Simplifying humility and integrity | Joe Sabini | TEDxUniversityofNevada

Humility, integrity and hypocrisy are words people use a lot without really understanding what they mean. In this brief talk, Joe Sabini provides a simple way to understand each concept and explains how they relate to each other.

Joe Sabini has lived in Reno, Nevada, for his whole life. After graduating at Reno High School, he has gone on to attend the University of Nevada, Reno. He is currently pursuing his undergraduate degree in the College of Business. Joe brings humor and thoughtfulness to all aspects in his life. He currently is found as the Lighting Designer for a local Creative Team at Grace Church Reno and assists in media and networking needs. In his free time, he finds passion in music and live productions and has performed all over the United States, including Carnegie Hall. He looks forward to traveling frequently to Australia along with other parts of the world on trips with the Love Does Team.

This talk was given at a TEDx event using the TED conference format but independently organized by a local community. Learn more at https://www.ted.com/tedx

Raise your hand if you lie.

(Laughter)

Now, right now, if your hand is down,

you're probably a bigger liar

than the person nearest to you
with their hand up.

(Laughter)

But it's OK, we all lie. Don't worry.
I lie all the time. Ask my mom.

(Laughter)

But the problem is that little things
turn into big things,

because how we do anything
is how we do everything.

So if you lie now, it's going make
lying later way easier,

but if you tell the truth now,
the truth comes way easier later.

But it's difficult because today
we're flooded with definitions

like honesty and hypocrisy and humility,

and maybe we don't even know
what they actually mean,

because if you google them,
on the surface, the definitions are easy,

but when you put them into practice,

they don't work.

Humility is unique,

because when you have humility,
people don't notice.

That's the most important
thing about humility.

It is nobody notices but you.

(Laughter)

Nine times out of ten,
if you ask someone if they have humility,

the answer will be yes

simply because they think
they're being honest.

But it's not honesty, it's not meekness,
it's not belittling yourself.

Humility is not thinking less of yourself.

Humility is thinking of yourself less.

Right?

So...

It's funny, someone was asking me and I
was trying to tell them about humility.

And the most important thing is
when you work in your groups,

your teams, your leadership,
wherever you are,

your ministry of your church,

nobody notices.

But it doesn't work
unless you have integrity.

Integrity is when you align
your actions with your beliefs.

The Latin adjective "integer"
means "whole" or "one."

Think of it like that. That's where
the word "integrity" comes from.

I think of it as a pizza,

so if you cut the pizza,
you separate the pieces out,

but it leaves a missing part
in the center.

When you don't have a center,
you don't have a point of reference,

you lose your integrity,

and it leaves you asking a question

like, "Why do I feel this way?
What am I missing?"

And oftentimes, we try to use beauty,
fame, money, success and popularity

to bring the pieces back together,

but it just doesn't work.

It leaves you confused and wondering,
you know, ''Why do I not feel important?''

But the thing about integrity
is that it leads to hypocrisy.

If you don't align your actions
with your beliefs,

you kind of become a hypocrite.

You know, acting has always been
a passion of mine.

I like the theater, the lights, the sound.

And in high school,

I was studying for a vocab test
and the word was "hypocrite,"

and the Greek root suggests
something along the lines

of an image of a person who wears a mask

and pretends to be someone
he or she is not

in a theatrical production.

And when I think about that,
I think we all have masks,

and maybe we don't
even know what they are,

like our social media or our internet
or the things we post.

But the theatrical production
is just our lives.

Do you post things
about what your life is like,

or do you post things about what you want
people to think that your life is like?

Do your tweets start with "I,"

or do your tweets start
with "We did this?"

It's all something to consider.

It's like the movies, you know,
Iron Man, Batman.

They all start out with a mask
in the beginning of the movie,

but by the end of the movie,

we figure out who they are.

You know, the person is revealed

and it's because they're missing
the humility side of the equation.

You know, I think
for humility and integrity,

one thing I like to do at this -
I mean, I feel like I'm 12 up here -

but one thing I like to do is look up.

I look up to people,
I find mentors in people.

I can study off of teachers and people
who have built legacies.

One of the things I do is -
a person I looked up to is named Ellie.

And when I think about Ellie,

she 100% has no prejudice
against color, race, religion.

She can face the world without lies,
she can take blame without resentment,

She can even start
the day without caffeine.

But it's interesting because
as soon as I think I'm just like Ellie,

I remember that Ellie
is just my family dog.

(Laughter)

So, as soon as you think
you have humility and integrity

and you're not a hypocrite,

you're just as good as your dog
that sleeps on the floor.

And so, all this is to say -
I'm not bashing my dog, I love my dog.

We all love our dogs.

But the thing is that there's no levels
to humility and integrity.

You either have it and you practice it,
or you have it and you don't practice it.

There's no in between, no one's better.

If you're great at it,
you're as good as your dog.

And so, my idea today is to encourage us
to align our actions with our beliefs,

think of ourselves a little bit less,
others a little bit more,

and we'll know exactly who we are
and we'll know exactly what we want.

Thank you.

(Applause)