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Brian Regan - Stupid in School

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    - [Brian] I don't know.
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    I'd be a lot better off if
    I would have studied more
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    when I was growing up, you know?
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    But you know where it all went wrong
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    was the day they started the spelling bee.
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    'Cause up until that day, I was an idiot,
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    but nobody else knew, you know?
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    Then the spelling bee day popped up.
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    "All right kids, up against the wall.
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    "It's time for public humiliation.
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    "Spell a word wrong, sit down
    in front of your friends."
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    You know, that's great for little egos.
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    "Hey, look at me, I'm a moron.
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    "I wasn't even close.
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    "I was using numbers and stuff."
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    That's why I admired that
    kid who spelled it wrong
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    on purpose so he could sit down, you know?
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    He knew he wasn't gonna win
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    so why stand there for three hours?
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    First round, cat, K-A-T, I'm outta here.
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    Then as he passed you, "Haha,
    I know there's two Ts."
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    I remember my teacher asked me,
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    "Brian, what's the I before E rule?"
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    "Huh.
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    Um, I before E always."
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    "What are you, an idiot, Brian?"
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    "Apparently."
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    So she explains it, "No
    Brian, it's I before E
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    "except after C, and when sounding like A,
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    "as in neighbor and weigh,
    and on weekends and holidays
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    "and all throughout May,
    and you'll always be wrong
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    "no matter what you say."
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    "Oh, that's a hard rule.
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    "That's a rough rule."
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    Plurals were hard too.
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    "Brian, how do you make a word a plural?"
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    "Oh.
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    "You put a S.
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    "You put a S at the end of it."
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    "When?"
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    "Huh.
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    "On weekends and holidays."
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    "No Brian, no. Let me show you."
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    So she asked this kid who
    knew everything, Irwin.
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    "Irwin, Irwin, what is the plural for ox?"
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    "Oxen. The farmer used his oxen."
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    "Brian?"
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    "What?"
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    "Brian, what's the plural for box?"
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    "Boxen.
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    "I bought two boxen of donuts."
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    "No, no, Brian. No.
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    "Let's try another one.
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    "Irwin, what is the plural for goose?"
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    "Geese. I saw a flock of geese."
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    "Brian?"
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    "What?"
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    "What's the plural for moose?"
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    "Moosen! I saw a flock of moosen!
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    "There are many of 'em, many, much moosen,
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    "out in the woods. In the
    woodes, in the woodsen.
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    "The meese wanted food.
    Food is to eat nizzit.
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    "The meese wanted food
    in the woodingizzit.
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    "In the food in the woodingizzit."
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    "Brian, Brian, you're an imbecile."
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    "Imbecilen."
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    "What are you, speaking German, Brian?"
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    "German. Germane! Jermaine Jackson!
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    "Jackson Five, Tito!"
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    "Brian, what the hell
    are you talking about?"
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    "I don't know. I don't know really."
Title:
Brian Regan - Stupid in School
Video Language:
English
Duration:
03:19

English subtitles

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