0:00:00.000,0:00:01.450
- [Brian] I don't know.

0:00:01.450,0:00:03.100
I'd be a lot better off if[br]I would have studied more

0:00:03.100,0:00:04.700
when I was growing up, you know?

0:00:05.570,0:00:06.810
But you know where it all went wrong

0:00:06.810,0:00:09.510
was the day they started the spelling bee.

0:00:09.510,0:00:10.950
'Cause up until that day, I was an idiot,

0:00:10.950,0:00:13.017
but nobody else knew, you know?

0:00:13.017,0:00:15.870
Then the spelling bee day popped up.

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"All right kids, up against the wall.

0:00:18.270,0:00:20.210
"It's time for public humiliation.

0:00:21.090,0:00:24.150
"Spell a word wrong, sit down[br]in front of your friends."

0:00:24.150,0:00:25.570
You know, that's great for little egos.

0:00:25.570,0:00:27.930
"Hey, look at me, I'm a moron.

0:00:27.930,0:00:30.240
"I wasn't even close.

0:00:30.240,0:00:32.619
"I was using numbers and stuff."

0:00:35.690,0:00:37.440
That's why I admired that[br]kid who spelled it wrong

0:00:37.440,0:00:39.830
on purpose so he could sit down, you know?

0:00:39.830,0:00:40.670
He knew he wasn't gonna win

0:00:40.670,0:00:42.470
so why stand there for three hours?

0:00:42.470,0:00:45.980
First round, cat, K-A-T, I'm outta here.

0:00:49.330,0:00:51.980
Then as he passed you, "Haha,[br]I know there's two Ts."

0:00:56.950,0:00:58.050
I remember my teacher asked me,

0:00:58.050,0:01:00.810
"Brian, what's the I before E rule?"

0:01:01.854,0:01:03.200
"Huh.

0:01:03.200,0:01:08.200
Um, I before E always."

0:01:10.070,0:01:12.290
"What are you, an idiot, Brian?"

0:01:12.290,0:01:13.123
"Apparently."

0:01:14.990,0:01:17.200
So she explains it, "No[br]Brian, it's I before E

0:01:17.200,0:01:19.830
"except after C, and when sounding like A,

0:01:19.830,0:01:22.630
"as in neighbor and weigh,[br]and on weekends and holidays

0:01:22.630,0:01:24.690
"and all throughout May,[br]and you'll always be wrong

0:01:24.690,0:01:25.940
"no matter what you say."

0:01:27.749,0:01:30.030
"Oh, that's a hard rule.

0:01:30.030,0:01:32.400
"That's a rough rule."

0:01:35.470,0:01:36.490
Plurals were hard too.

0:01:36.490,0:01:38.540
"Brian, how do you make a word a plural?"

0:01:39.591,0:01:41.010
"Oh.

0:01:41.010,0:01:42.770
"You put a S.

0:01:42.770,0:01:45.191
"You put a S at the end of it."

0:01:45.191,0:01:46.024
"When?"

0:01:47.442,0:01:48.275
"Huh.

0:01:49.380,0:01:51.880
"On weekends and holidays."

0:01:54.550,0:01:56.470
"No Brian, no. Let me show you."

0:01:56.470,0:01:58.320
So she asked this kid who[br]knew everything, Irwin.

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"Irwin, Irwin, what is the plural for ox?"

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"Oxen. The farmer used his oxen."

0:02:04.640,0:02:05.671
"Brian?"

0:02:05.671,0:02:06.504
"What?"

0:02:07.516,0:02:09.681
"Brian, what's the plural for box?"

0:02:09.681,0:02:10.514
"Boxen.

0:02:14.720,0:02:17.100
"I bought two boxen of donuts."

0:02:21.222,0:02:22.280
"No, no, Brian. No.

0:02:23.720,0:02:24.553
"Let's try another one.

0:02:24.553,0:02:26.390
"Irwin, what is the plural for goose?"

0:02:26.390,0:02:31.390
"Geese. I saw a flock of geese."

0:02:32.080,0:02:33.043
"Brian?"

0:02:33.043,0:02:33.876
"What?"

0:02:34.770,0:02:36.570
"What's the plural for moose?"

0:02:39.710,0:02:43.640
"Moosen! I saw a flock of moosen!

0:02:44.960,0:02:47.700
"There are many of 'em, many, much moosen,

0:02:47.700,0:02:50.800
"out in the woods. In the[br]woodes, in the woodsen.

0:02:50.800,0:02:53.880
"The meese wanted food.[br]Food is to eat nizzit.

0:02:53.880,0:02:56.526
"The meese wanted food[br]in the woodingizzit.

0:02:56.526,0:02:58.448
"In the food in the woodingizzit."

0:02:58.448,0:03:02.720
"Brian, Brian, you're an imbecile."

0:03:04.588,0:03:05.588
"Imbecilen."

0:03:06.890,0:03:08.080
"What are you, speaking German, Brian?"

0:03:08.080,0:03:10.320
"German. Germane! Jermaine Jackson!

0:03:11.260,0:03:12.580
"Jackson Five, Tito!"

0:03:12.580,0:03:14.428
"Brian, what the hell[br]are you talking about?"

0:03:14.428,0:03:16.690
"I don't know. I don't know really."