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From Bombs to Bread | Aala El-Khani | TEDxManchester

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    Good morning.
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    Worldwide, over 1.5 billion people
    experience armed conflict.
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    In response, people are forced
    to flee their country,
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    leaving over 15 million refugees.
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    Children, without a doubt,
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    are the most innocent
    and vulnerable victims ...
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    but not just from
    the obvious physical dangers,
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    but from the often unspoken effects
    that wars have on their families.
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    The experiences of war
    leave children at a real high risk
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    for the development
    of emotional and behavioral problems.
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    Children, as we can only imagine,
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    will feel worried, threatened and at risk.
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    But there is good news.
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    The quality of care
    that children receive in their families
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    can have a more significant
    effect on their well-being
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    than from the actual experiences of war
    that they have been exposed to.
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    So actually, children can be protected
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    by warm, secure parenting
    during and after conflict.
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    In 2011, I was a first-year PhD student
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    in the University of Manchester
    School of Psychological Sciences.
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    Like many of you here,
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    I watched the crisis in Syria
    unfold in front of me on the TV.
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    My family is originally from Syria,
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    and very early on,
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    I lost several family members
    in really horrifying ways.
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    I'd sit and I'd gather with my family
    and watch the TV.
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    We've all seen those scenes:
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    bombs destroying buildings,
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    chaos, destruction
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    and people screaming and running.
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    It was always the people screaming
    and running that really got me the most,
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    especially those
    terrified-looking children.
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    I was a mother to two young,
    typically inquisitive children.
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    They were five and six then,
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    at an age where they typically
    asked lots and lots of questions,
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    and expected real, convincing answers.
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    So, I began to wonder
    what it might be like
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    to parent my children
    in a war zone and a refugee camp.
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    Would my children change?
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    Would my daughter's bright,
    happy eyes lose their shine?
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    Would my son's really relaxed and carefree
    nature become fearful and withdrawn?
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    How would I cope?
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    Would I change?
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    As psychologists and parent trainers,
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    we know that arming parents
    with skills in caring for their children
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    can have a huge effect
    on their well-being,
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    and we call this parent training.
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    The question I had was,
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    could parent training programs
    be useful for families
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    while they were still in war zones
    or refugee camps?
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    Could we reach them
    with advice or training
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    that would help them
    through these struggles?
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    So I approached my PhD supervisor,
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    Professor Rachel Calam,
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    with the idea of using my academic skills
    to make some change in the real world.
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    I wasn't quite sure
    what exactly I wanted to do.
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    She listened carefully and patiently,
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    and then to my joy she said,
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    "If that's what you want to do,
    and it means so much to you,
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    then let's do it.
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    Let's find ways to see if parent programs
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    can be useful for families
    in these contexts."
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    So for the past five years,
    myself and my colleagues --
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    Prof. Calam and Dr. Kim Cartwright --
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    have been working
    on ways to support families
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    that have experienced
    war and displacement.
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    Now, to know how to help families
    that have been through conflict
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    support their children,
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    the first step must obviously be
    to ask them what they're struggling with,
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    right?
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    I mean, it seems obvious.
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    But it's often those
    that are the most vulnerable,
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    that we're trying to support,
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    that we actually don't ask.
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    How many times have we just assumed
    we know exactly the right thing
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    that's going to help someone or something
    without actually asking them first?
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    So I traveled to refugee camps
    in Syria and in Turkey,
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    and I sat with families, and I listened.
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    I listened to their parenting challenges,
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    I listened to their parenting struggles
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    and I listened to their call for help.
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    And sometimes that was just paused,
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    as all I could do was hold hands with them
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    and just join them
    in silent crying and prayer.
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    They told me about their struggles,
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    they told me about the rough,
    harsh refugee camp conditions
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    that made it hard to focus
    on anything but practical chores
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    like collecting clean water.
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    They told me how they watched
    their children withdraw;
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    the sadness, depression, anger,
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    bed-wetting, thumb-sucking,
    fear of loud noises,
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    fear of nightmares --
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    terrifying, terrifying nightmares.
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    These families had been through
    what we had been watching on the TV.
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    The mothers --
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    almost half of them
    were now widows of war,
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    or didn't even know
    if their husbands were dead or alive --
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    described how they felt
    they were coping so badly.
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    They watched their children change
    and they had no idea how to help them.
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    They didn't know how to answer
    their children's questions.
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    What I found incredibly astonishing
    and so motivational
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    was that these families were
    so motivated to support their children.
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    Despite all these challenges they faced,
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    they were trying to help their children.
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    They were making attempts
    at seeking support from NGO workers,
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    from refugee camp teachers,
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    professional medics,
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    other parents.
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    One mother I met had only been
    in a camp for four days,
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    and had already made two attempts
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    at seeking support
    for her eight-year-old daughter
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    who was having terrifying nightmares.
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    But sadly, these attempts
    are almost always useless.
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    Refugee camp doctors, when available,
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    are almost always too busy,
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    or don't have the knowledge or the time
    for basic parenting supports.
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    Refugee camp teachers and other parents
    are just like them --
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    part of a new refugee community
    who's struggling with new needs.
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    So then we began to think.
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    How could we help these families?
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    The families were struggling with things
    much bigger than they could cope with.
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    The Syrian crisis made it clear
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    how incredibly impossible it would be
    to reach families on an individual level.
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    How else could we help them?
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    How would we reach families
    at a population level
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    and low costs
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    in these terrifying, terrifying times?
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    After hours of speaking to NGO workers,
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    one suggested a fantastic innovative idea
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    of distributing parenting
    information leaflets via bread wrappers --
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    bread wrappers that were being delivered
    to families in a conflict zone in Syria
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    by humanitarian workers.
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    So that's what we did.
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    The bread wrappers haven't changed
    at all in their appearance,
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    except for the addition
    of two pieces of paper.
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    One was a parenting information leaflet
    that had basic advice and information
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    that normalized to the parent
    what they might be experiencing,
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    and what their child
    might be experiencing.
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    And information on how they could
    support themselves and their children,
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    such as information like spending
    time talking to your child,
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    showing them more affection,
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    being more patient with your child,
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    talking to your children.
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    The other piece of paper
    was a feedback questionnaire,
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    and of course, there was a pen.
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    So is this simply leaflet distribution,
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    or is this actually a possible means
    of delivering psychological first aid
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    that provides warm,
    secure, loving parenting?
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    We managed to distribute
    3,000 of these in just one week.
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    What was incredible was
    we had a 60 percent response rate.
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    60 percent of the 3,000
    families responded.
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    I don't know how many
    researchers we have here today,
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    but that kind of response
    rate is fantastic.
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    To have that in Manchester
    would be a huge achievement,
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    let alone in a conflict zone in Syria --
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    really highlighting how important
    these kinds of messages were to families.
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    I remember how excited and eager we were
    for the return of the questionnaires.
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    The families had left
    hundreds of messages --
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    most incredibly positive and encouraging.
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    But my favorite has got to be,
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    "Thank you for not forgetting
    about us and our children."
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    This really illustrates
    the potential means
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    of the delivery of psychological
    first aid to families,
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    and the return of feedback, too.
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    Just imagine replicating this
    using other means
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    such as baby milk distribution,
    or female hygiene kits,
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    or even food baskets.
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    But let's bring this closer to home,
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    because the refugee crisis
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    is one that is having an effect
    on every single one of us.
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    We're bombarded with images daily
    of statistics and of photos,
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    and that's not surprising,
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    because by last month,
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    over one million refugees
    had reached Europe.
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    One million.
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    Refugees are joining our communities,
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    they're becoming our neighbors,
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    their children are attending
    our children's schools.
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    So we've adapted the leaflet
    to meet the needs of European refugees,
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    and we have them online, open-access,
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    in areas with a really high
    refugee influx.
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    For example, the Swedish healthcare
    uploaded it onto their website,
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    and within the first 45 minutes,
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    it was downloaded 343 times --
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    really highlighting how important it is
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    for volunteers, practitioners
    and other parents
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    to have open-access,
    psychological first-aid messages.
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    In 2013, I was sitting on the cold,
    hard floor of a refugee camp tent
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    with mothers sitting around me
    as I was conducting a focus group.
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    Across from me stood an elderly lady
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    with what seemed to be
    a 13-year-old girl lying beside her,
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    with her head on the elderly lady's knees.
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    The girl stayed quiet
    throughout the focus group,
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    not talking at all,
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    with her knees
    curled up against her chest.
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    Towards the end of the focus group,
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    and as I was thanking
    the mothers for their time,
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    the elderly lady looked at me
    while pointing at the young girl,
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    and said to me, "Can you help us with...?"
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    Not quite sure what she expected me to do,
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    I looked at the young girl and smiled,
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    and in Arabic I said,
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    "Salaam alaikum. Shu-ismak?"
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    "What's your name?"
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    She looked at me really
    confused and unengaged,
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    but then said, "Halul."
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    Halul is the pet's name
    for the Arabic female name, Hala,
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    and is only really used
    to refer to really young girls.
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    At that point I realized that actually
    Hala was probably much older than 13.
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    It turns out Hala was a 25-year-old
    mother to three young children.
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    Hala had been a confident,
    bright, bubbly, loving, caring mother
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    to her children,
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    but the war had changed all of that.
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    She had lived through bombs
    being dropped in her town;
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    she had lived through explosions.
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    When fighter jets
    were flying around their building,
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    dropping bombs,
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    her children would be screaming,
    terrified from the noise.
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    Hala would frantically grab pillows
    and cover her children's ears
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    to block out the noise,
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    all the while screaming herself.
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    When they reached the refugee camp
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    and she knew they were finally
    in some kind of safety,
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    she completely withdrew
    to acting like her old childhood self.
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    She completely rejected her family --
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    her children, her husband.
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    Hala simply could no longer cope.
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    This is a parenting struggle
    with a really tough ending,
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    but sadly, it's not uncommon.
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    Those who experience
    armed conflict and displacement
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    will face serious emotional struggles.
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    And that's something we can all relate to.
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    If you have been through
    a devastating time in your life,
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    if you have lost someone
    or something you really care about,
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    how would you continue to cope?
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    Could you still be able
    to care for yourself and for your family?
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    Given that the first years
    of a child's life are crucial
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    for healthy physical
    and emotional development,
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    and that 1.5 billion people
    are experiencing armed conflict --
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    many of whom are now
    joining our communities --
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    we cannot afford to turn a blind eye
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    to the needs of those
    who are experiencing war and displacement.
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    We must prioritize
    these families' needs --
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    both those who are internally displaced,
    and those who are refugees worldwide.
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    These needs must be prioritized
    by NGO workers, policy makers,
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    the WHO, the UNHCR
    and every single one of us
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    in whatever capacity it is
    that we function in our society.
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    When we begin to recognize
    the individual faces of the conflict,
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    when we begin to notice
    those intricate emotions on their faces,
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    we begin to see them as humans, too.
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    We begin to see
    the needs of these families,
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    and these are the real human needs.
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    When these family needs are prioritized,
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    interventions for children
    in humanitarian settings
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    will prioritize and recognize the primary
    role of the family in supporting children.
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    Family mental health
    will be shouting loud and clear
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    in global, international agenda.
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    And children will be less likely
    to enter social service systems
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    in resettlement countries
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    because their families
    would have had support earlier on.
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    And we will be more open-minded,
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    more welcoming, more caring
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    and more trusting to those
    who are joining our communities.
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    We need to stop wars.
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    We need to build a world where children
    can dream of planes dropping gifts,
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    and not bombs.
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    Until we stop armed conflicts
    raging throughout the world,
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    families will continue to be displaced,
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    leaving children vulnerable.
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    But by improving parenting
    and caregiver support,
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    it may be possible to weaken the links
    between war and psychological difficulties
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    in children and their families.
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    Thank you.
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    (Applause)
Title:
From Bombs to Bread | Aala El-Khani | TEDxManchester
Description:

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Video Language:
English
Team:
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Project:
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Duration:
14:20

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