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(car engine sounds)
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SHUT UP
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Car Seller (Anthony): Sup'?
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Ian: Hi, I'm here for the car.
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I saw your car on the ad.
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I'm interested.
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Car Seller: Alright, dog.
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Just go 'round the side right here, and I'll drive it out alright?
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Ian: Ok.
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Ian: "Her ball"?
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Ian: What the hell is "her ball" supposed to mean?
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Car Seller: Oh, dog, dude, dude let me go get some of the letters, they fall off.
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Yeah, let me go get 'em.
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Car Seller: The Fireball, ha ha!
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First, check out the decals, they're fireballs, that's where the car gets the name, they cost about 800 dollars each.
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They give you 100 horsepower, each fireball.
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Car Seller: You think this is black paint?
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No, it was forged by engineers, inside a volcano, in the lava.
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Car Seller: The spoiler, do you think how much extra speed you can get with this thing?
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The car won't go flippin-floppin, whatever, it won't do it!
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Ian: You call that a spoiler?
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It's uh, it's a binder and...2 cups taped together.
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Car Seller: Look, the performance speaks for itself.
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Looks don't matter in this case.
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Car seller: Time for the interior, I'm going to let you sit in the drivers seat, So you feel how an actual race car driver, actually feels.
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All right, lets fire up this bad boy.
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(Ian Starts Car) Woohoo, feel the baby roar!
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Ian: Dude, what the hell was that?!
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Car Seller: It's a security measurer so that when thieves try to take your car, it'll stall and they can't get away fast.
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See what I mean?
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Ian: So I can't drive fast, and this is a fast car?
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car seller: No, no,no!
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I-It just doesn't start fast, so that people can't steal it.
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Ian: Right, all right well, whatever, lets just go.
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car seller: Alright, go ahead, start the car.
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Let's get out of here.
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Look in the back, we got a refrigerator that I got installed.
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How's that baby lookin', you want some cold refreshments?
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Ian: Well, it's just looks like, uh, a cooler back there, dude.
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Car Seller: No, dude, that's a refrigerator.
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HOLY CRAP! WE'RE GOING SO DAMN FAST, BRO!!!!
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Ian: It says we're going only about 25 miles per hour.
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car seller: Dude, in this car, you gotta multiply everything by 10.
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We're going at least 200 miles an hour.
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Check this out, take your hands off the steering wheel and close your eyes, let the car's computer do the driving for you.
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Ian: Ok, if you say so.
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Car Seller: Oh sh--t!
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Ian: Is this computer working?
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Because like, this thing seems like it's swerving back and forth.
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Car Seller: Yeah bro, this computer's doing perfect.Alright you do the driving now, the computer can only handle so much.
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Ian: Uh, ok.
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Uh, where did the spoiler go?
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Car Seller: Oh, dude, it retracts itself into the trunk, so that you can get more speed when you're going at uh, when you're going pretty fast.
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Car Seller: So, what d'ya think, bro?
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Only 800 bucks!
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Ian: You know, it's not that great of a car, I mean...Oh what the hell is that!?
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Ian: Oh my God, is that a cupholder?!
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Ian: I'll take it!
