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Key & Peele - Consequences

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    [school bell rings]
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    [indistinct chatter]
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    OKAY, STUDENTS, SETTLE DOWN.
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    SETTLE DOWN.
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    THAT INCLUDES YOU,
    MR. RODRIGUEZ.
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    DO YOU WANT TO TAKE THE MILK
    CARTON OFF OF YOUR HEAD?
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    THANK YOU SO MUCH.
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    WE HAVE A SPECIAL GUEST TODAY.
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    HE'S FROM THIS NEIGHBORHOOD,
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    AND HE'S A FORMER GANG MEMBER,
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    AND HE'S COMING HERE
    THIS MORNING TO TALK TO YOU
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    ABOUT LIFE CHOICES.
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    SO, PLEASE, GIVE A WARM
    CENTRAL HIGH SCHOOL WELCOME
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    TO DONNIE HERRERA.
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    [applause]
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    - I USED TO BE JUST LIKE YOU...
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    [melancholy piano music]
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    JUST LIKE YOU, YOU, YOU, YOU.
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    USED TO CLOWN AROUND...
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    MAKE FUN OF THE PRINCIPAL...
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    PUT MILK ON MY HEAD,
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    JUST LIKE YOU, RODRIGUEZ.
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    AND THEN...
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    I GOT HIT WITH AIDS.
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    CONSEQUENCES.
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    GOT INTO SOME
    REAL TROUBLE, BOY.
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    STOLE FROM MY MOM AND DAD...
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    STOLE FROM MY OWN SISTER!
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    AND THEN ONE DAY...
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    A PIANO FELL ON MY HEAD.
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    - WHAT?
    - CONSEQUENCES.
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    - I FEEL LIKE
    HE MISSED A STEP THERE.
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    - GAVE ME 88 CONCUSSIONS,
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    ONE FOR EACH KEY.
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    YOU'D THINK I'M LEARNING,
    BUT, NO.
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    SEE, I'M JUST LIKE YOU.
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    I GOT BACK OUT THERE,
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    STARTED MAKING
    SOME REAL CRIMES, HOMEBOY.
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    OH, YEAH.
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    OH, YEAH.
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    AND THEN...
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    I GOT TRAMPLED
    BY A HERD OF BUFFALO.
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    - WHAT?
    - CONSEQUENCES.
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    - OKAY, DONNIE,
    I THINK WE'VE HAD ENOUGH.
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    - NOT DONE WITH MY STORY!
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    I WAS LIKE YOU!
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    I DECIDED IT'D BE COOL
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    TO HANG OUT
    WITH SOME OF THE TOUGH KIDS.
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    MM. YOU KNOW
    WHO I'M TALKING ABOUT.
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    THEY WERE HANGING
    ON THE STREETS LATE AT NIGHT.
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    MORE THAN
    CIGARETTE SMOKERS, HOMES.
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    AND THEN...
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    ONE DAY I GOT SHOT
    OUT OF A CATAPULT.
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    - THAT'S IT.
    OKAY.
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    - INTO THE MOUTH OF A DRAGON!
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    - STUDENTS, EVERYTHING YOU'VE
    HEARD HERE TODAY IS A LIE.
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    - I DON'T LIE ANYMORE.
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    - YOU'RE ALL EXCUSED.
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    - LOOK AT ME!
    - PLEASE, I APOLOGIZE.
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    - I SHOULDN'T EVEN BE HERE!
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    - THANK YOU, AURELIO.
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    I APOLOGIZE, DENISE.
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    - SO I GOT REALLY DEEP
    INTO CRIME.
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    I DID A DRIVE-BY AT MY OWN
    DAUGHTER'SQUINCEAÑERA!
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    YEAH, SHOT UP EVERYBODY--
    DEAD, KILLED!
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    YEAH!
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    YEAH!
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    THEN I GOT SUCKED
    INTO A WORMHOLE.
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    CONSEQUENCES.
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    - THAT'S IT. OKAY.
    EVERYBODY GO.
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    - I WAS IN ANOTHER DIMENSION,
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    TRIED TO INTRODUCE
    MY OWN PARENTS TO EACH OTHER.
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    ALMOST FAILED.
    ARM WAS DISAPPEARING.
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    - I'VE HAD IT.
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    - I INVENTEDJOHNNY B. GOODE■
    AT MY PARENTS' PROM,
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    AND AT THE LAST MOMENT,
    THEY KISSED, AND IT CAME BACK.
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    - THE FASTER WE GET AWAY
    FROM HIM, THE BETTER.
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    - BUT NOBODY BELIEVE ME!
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    WHERE'S MY CRACK?
    WHERE'S MY CRACK?
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    OH.
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    [booming crash]
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    OH!
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    CONSEQUENCES!
Title:
Key & Peele - Consequences
Description:
more » « less
Video Language:
English
Duration:
03:45

English subtitles

Revisions

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