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SNL - Mike's Marbleopolis - Saturday Night Live

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    Marble columns...
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    Elegant, sturdy,
    and bursting with class.
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    Nothing says
    I've got money and power...
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    like
    marble columns.
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    How do I know?
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    Because I've been selling
    marble columns to rich people
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    for over
    10 years.
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    I'm talking
    millionaires.
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    You put marble columns
    in your house,
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    that place is gonna
    look like a mansion.
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    Transform your living room!
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    The bathroom!
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    Even your driveway!
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    How much you wanna bet the car
    pulling up to that driveway is a Rolls-Royce?
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    You gotta get yourself
    some marble columns.
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    You like eating
    breakfast?
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    How about eating breakfast
    in a kitchen with marble columns?
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    Ooh lala!
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    Now,
    that's a fancy meal!
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    You need a little help
    in the bedroom department?
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    Try some
    marble columns.
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    You could go in at it
    like the king and queen of France.
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    You gotta get yourself
    some marble columns.
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    You don't believe me?
    Just ask my daughter, Lexi.
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    Look at these columns.
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    Look at this one!
    Look at that one!
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    Can you believe it?
    You could stick these things everywhere.
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    They'll make your house
    look like a palace, like a castle.
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    People are gonna
    look at your house and go:
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    Who lives there?
    The pope?
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    What is that?
    The Playboy mansion?
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    It's ridiculous!
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    Imagine pulling up to your house
    and seeing these and going:
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    Oh my God!
    I live here!
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    How nuts would it be
    to own this one,
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    or that one,
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    or this one,
    or that one?
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    You gotta get yourself
    some marble columns.
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    The Romans had them
    and they didn't do too bad, right?
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    Hey, you know what?
    Take a good look at the White House.
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    Notice anything classy
    on the porch?
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    Columns!
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    So, come on down
    to Mike's Marbleopolis
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    and get yourself
    some columns.
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    Mike's Marbleopolis
    2941 Central Avenue in LUNBROOK
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    You gotta get yourself
    some marble columns.
Title:
SNL - Mike's Marbleopolis - Saturday Night Live
Description:

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SEASON 32: http://j.mp/19xapeb
SNL - Mike's Marbleopolis - Saturday Night Live

Nothing transforms your life like marble columns. Aired 04/21/07
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Video Language:
English
Duration:
03:10

English subtitles

Revisions

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