< Return to Video

If Google Was a Guy (Part 2)

  • 0:04 - 0:06
    (Google) Next! I said next!
  • 0:06 - 0:09
    If Google was still a guy
  • 0:09 - 0:11
    -Why am I alive?
    -Okay...
  • 0:11 - 0:14
    -Cream cheese is cheese?
    -Wait, do you still want to know about--
  • 0:14 - 0:19
    ~Avocado pit huge why?
    -Okay, don't speak in these weird haikus.
  • 0:19 - 0:21
    -How to tell if pregnant?
    -Oh boy...
  • 0:21 - 0:23
    -How to tell if--
    -If pregnant?
  • 0:24 - 0:25
    JENNIFER!
  • 0:25 - 0:28
    -Local mosque, Seattle.
    -NSA, don't mind me.
  • 0:29 - 0:31
    How to pronounce "do-gah-coin"?
  • 0:31 - 0:33
    -According to Google maps, there's a number--
    -Security.
  • 0:33 - 0:34
    -Can you please not black mail?
    -Just...
  • 0:35 - 0:37
    -Oh, excuse me...
    -Oh, no, no...come on in.
  • 0:38 - 0:41
    Today is Jackson Pollock's birthday
    so we're celebrating
  • 0:41 - 0:44
    -his particular style of painting.
    -Why fart smell?
  • 0:44 - 0:47
    Not the most important painters
    of all time, and you want to know
  • 0:47 - 0:49
    why farts smell, so there you go!
  • 0:49 - 0:50
    Flight to Washington.
  • 0:50 - 0:52
    Bank transfer all money to dogecoin how?
  • 0:53 - 0:54
    -Okay, Glass.
    -(snickers)
  • 0:54 - 0:57
    Search "avoid being bullied
    for wearing Google Glass"!
  • 0:57 - 0:58
    (cracks up)
  • 0:58 - 1:02
    -Flight to Washington state.
    -I knew you made that mistake.
  • 1:02 - 1:04
    -F-F-F-F-F-F-F-F-F--
    -I think your F key is stuck!
  • 1:04 - 1:05
    F-F-F-F-F...
  • 1:05 - 1:07
    Why longitude shaped like an orange slice?
  • 1:08 - 1:10
    -You are so wrong, dumb ass!
    -We'll see.
  • 1:11 - 1:14
    Groundhogs Day or Groundhog Day.
  • 1:14 - 1:17
    -Groundhog Day.
    -OOOH!
  • 1:18 - 1:19
    Haircut place bowl cut.
  • 1:19 - 1:21
    -Terror pictures.
    -Oh...
  • 1:22 - 1:24
    Oh, sorry.
    Terrior pictures.
  • 1:24 - 1:26
    Oh! (chuckles) Okay...
  • 1:28 - 1:30
    (laughing in delight)
  • 1:30 - 1:32
    -Hey, man, let me do my job, alright?
    -Fuck you!
  • 1:32 - 1:34
    Can sue for screen door injured?
  • 1:35 - 1:37
    Where to buy pet Russian dolphin?
  • 1:37 - 1:39
    Why do my farts smell?
  • 1:39 - 1:40
    -Tent...
    -Doing a little camping, huh?
  • 1:41 - 1:43
    -Tentacle hentai.
    -OH COME ON!
  • 1:52 - 1:56
    Open for business, everyone!
    Come on in, it's awesome in here!
  • 1:57 - 1:59
    Soon...they'll come soon. Heh.
Title:
If Google Was a Guy (Part 2)
Description:
more » « less
Video Language:
English
Team:
Captions Requested
Duration:
02:01

  • Sara Huang

    Could someone please do a QA of my English subtitles? I think they are alright, but there were a couple of areas where the audio was difficult to hear and I could use a second pair of ears to see if my subtitles are as accurate as they can be. Thanks!

  • Claude Almansi

    Thanks a bunch for adding this video, Sara, and for subtitling it in English: you've understood several unclear passages that escaped me by ear, but I'll listen to it again tomorrow to check. I wish I knew Chinese so I could understand how you translated it - it must have been both tough and fun, I guess?

  • Sara Huang

    Heh. It's a hilarious video and I hope others have a fun time translating it. English is actually my first language; I'm an American but took on Huang as my surname after marrying at Taiwanese guy. I know a bit of Chinese, but it's subpar at best and I can't write at all :).

English subtitles

Revisions Compare revisions

Our website uses cookies for analysis purposes.