"INAUGURATION DAY" — A Bad Lip Reading of Donald Trump's Inauguration

Politicians CAN say what they're actually thinking...

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It's not so important

Oh surprise!

I have some pretzels for you!

Melania, do you know what you just said?

Wow, you're cheery

Me?- I'm always like this

Oh yeah, sure

You're certainly not gonna be

When can I see you walk away?

You're bad company

I can't wait

You suckkk

Now's your chance.... call it off

You can be a funny weiner, can't you?

I'm important

You want to be me, don't you

Quite a figure, quite a figure

No

Looks like we have a problem

Yeah, leave it to me

We're gonna squeeze him

Hadouken!

Hadouken to your face

Ha-ruh-buh-buh-buh

Ghhaaaa

Ah! Are you wearing a big boy shirt?

Yeah, I prolly never will again

Help.

I'm gonna barf

You ever wash that wig?

You got me again George! Good one

That is a zinger!

I like your nail polish, but not too much

Now I pretend I like you

But I hate you... inside

You're a creep

I think you're old like dirt

Repeat after me:

I make grease pellets in my sweat

I make grease pellets in my sweat

I was disappointed they didn't find the continent of Atlantis yet

I was disappointed they didn't find the continent of Atlantis yet

The new kid smells like falafel and wants to shave my mustache

The new kid smells like falafel and wants to shave my mustache

So did Aunt Belinda

So did Aunt Belinda

Shake hand

You crushed it

You think?

Nope, I'm teasing you, you looked depressed

I don't feel good

Now raise your shrunken hand and repeat after me:

I gotta get a grip, you saw me squat

I gotta get a grip, you saw me squat

You think i won't fling three eggs at you?

You think i won't fling three eggs at you?

The goldfish of pre-teens never had a chance

The goldfish of pre-teens never had a chance

I personally have puked at a cage fight

I personally have puked at a cage fight

Then I chewed an awful lot of cheese

Then I chewed an awful lot of cheese

And I stored it in my gut

And I stored it in my gut

What's your name?

Together we will builf a bar in rural Connecticut

And we will make it a bar with a nanny

And we will make it a bar called "Brown Lady"

And we will make it a bar that has stuff in it

And extra good leather

[singing] "When you want to make a bad day a greater day"

"Then come to Brown Lady!"

Now let's party!

No music, just me

You know what I want later?

A hamburger and Milk Duds

And not fish

Good old fun

Yay?

I'm also gonna need you to scrape my bunions

Yes good

The guy's the boss, you know, so...

Just remember who brought you here

Thank you, my prince

Thank you

I WIN!

You know, you might want to clean my car after this

I mean, now I really wouldn't call it yours, right?

You gotta go back to the Jetta

Pretty dorky!

At least I still know how to drive

I do not. I don't do it.

It's why I got a big truck

Gonna figure out a way to bury your stuff fast

I'm burying your junk already

Yeah, well that's my past

The kids made me a shiv, and I mean, I'm not afraid to use it

Eyes up front

You got a blade?

Look straight ahead.