WatchMojo Debunks The Vegan Diet!

Want to learn how to make a video about interesting
vegan facts that subversively gives the vegan

movement a kick in its collective gonads?!
Great! Let’s get started.

Hi it's Emily from Bite Size Vegan and
welcome to a special vegan nugget.

Let's dive right in, shall we.

We’re going to use the stunning
case study of the recent video posted by WatchMojo,

the 7th largest YouTube channel with currently
over 10 million subscribers.

So, how do you make a deliciously
subversive anti-vegan video out of an

innocuous-sounding 5 fun facts premise?

Let's take a look.

First, call them “the most interesting and
original facts about veganism

that you might not have heard before.”

Even though you’re not actually using any
factual basis for your claims and parroting

many overly tired anti-vegan arguments in
the guise of “original fascinating facts!”

Second, use lots of clips from popular culture
with the majority doing the vegan mocking for you.

Simpsons: You don’t win friends with salad!
You don't win friends with salad!

27 Dresses: I used to be a vegan, but you know, it was too much of a hassle.

Oh god, I know, I mean even being a
vegetarian is a challenge.

Now let’s dig into the facts. Show you really
mean business by leading with a fact that’s

not even really about veganism and is a borderline
non-sequitor. “At least two independent

studies looking at fossil evidence suggest
that eating cooked foods, including meat,

helped our ancestors brains grow over millions
of years into the brains humans have today.”

Now just hope that people didn’t listen
to your own words that it was the process

of cooking, not the meat consumption, that
most aided in brain development,

a view also supported by Harvard
anthropologist Richard Wrangham.

Also don’t mention the fact that the human
brain runs primarily on glucose, not proteins

and fats, meaning higher starch consumption
primarily fueled our brain growth.

Ignore any articles, studies or scientists who point
to our ancestors largely vegetarian diets.

To really bring your point home, show a clip
from Gladiator, but for the love of all that

is holy, do not to mention any studies showing
that the gladiators were primarily vegan.

“They analyzed these gladiators. In this
case they looked at the bones of the gladiators

and they looked at the mineral content and
found they had a low zinc, high strontium

content, which indicated that their diet was
very, very vegetarian. In fact they called it vegan.

The galdiators.

And most of all, be sure not to actually cite
any studies supporting your claims

outside of a screenshot of an article.

By the way all the claims in this video have
citations in the blog post linked below.

And you thought I was just
pulling this out of my…

And don’t worry about the fact that what
our ancestors did or did not do has no bearing

on the choices we make today.
No one cares about logic.

For your next fact, offer up a statistic.

People f--king love statistics
and it makes you sound smart.

“Up to 6% of the United States is vegan and a large majority of non-meat eaters are women."

Good. Now throw in a comment that reminds
people just how f---ing awful being vegan is.

“It’s no surprise that vegans are
in the minority when it comes to their diet.”

And in case any men are considering veganism,
be sure to emasculate them with stats:

"Up to 74% of those who don’t eat meat, whether
they be vegetarians or vegans are female.”

And definitely don’t show them pictures
of these vegans.

Then to seal the deal, show a clip of such
a female vegan saying something outrageous,

“you should absolutely be forced to be vegan.”

Excellent.

For your next fact, back off a little bit
in case people are catching on

to your real aim and mention
something nice about veganism.

“Number Three: A vegan diet sees better results in weight loss attempts."

That’s nice.

Now that you have them lulled into a sense
of security, it’s time for the big guns.

“Number Two: A vegan diet may lead to an
increased risk of heart disease.”

Oh yes, my friend. You are going there. Before people
freak out, be sure to toss them something

marginally scientific-sounding. It’s safest
to stick with a widely held misconception

about veganism so they don’t have to do
much work to believe you.

“A vegan diet often lacks several key nutrients.”
Nailed it. Bring it home with some elaboration

and, if you can, a 3D rendering
of some medical stuff.

“such as omega 3 fatty acids and vitamin
b12, which leads to an increased risk of developing

blood clots or hardened arteries.”

Definitely don’t link to a playlist like
this with a medical doctor whose specialty

is clinical nutrition responding to every
major nutrient of concern when going vegan.

But be sure to give them a little credit in
a backhanded statement

that actually lends more credence to your cause.

"Research done at St. Michael's hospial in Toronto shows that a low carb vegan diet can

decrease the risk of heart disease
by as much as much as 10% over 10 years.”

Completely ignore the fact that a plant-based
diet is the only way of eating that not only

prevents but actually reverses heart disease.
Or that eating animal products raises your

cholesterol, the one true risk factor
for heart disease.

It's either plants or Lipitor, people.

And certainly don’t tell them about the
disgusting amount of peer-reviewed

studies linked on the blog post for this video
supporting this claim.

Then close it out this section with some vague
comment that allows the viewers to continue

eating exactly the way they are. “maybe
the takeaway is that when it comes to nutrition,

science will contradict itself eventually
and what was going to make you live forever

is now going to kill you and visa versa”
totally sidestepping, of course, that your

video is a shining example of the source of
such confusion.

Then, throw down the ultimate vegan trump
card “and I give up, give me a bacon milkshake.”

Because this is an original video, remember.
And no vegan has ever heard the bacon argument.

Genius.

Now in case anyone is still considering going
vegan, crown this masterpiece

with a fact that will shut them down before they start.

"Number one: The majority of people who attempt a vegan diet abandon it."

Make sure you make it sound like it’s really hard

not to torture and kill animals for food.

Also make sure not to say how the majority
of people who start an exercise program also quit,

because people may realize it’s not
the exercise or veganism’s fault – it’s the people.

Just say, “The most common reasons for getting
back on the meat train are problems like

boredom with veggie food options and finding it difficult to sustain a meat-free diet.”

And do not include this clip: “Because once
you rule out the flesh of animals’ bodies,

the secretions and objects that come out of
their orifices, there’s just really nothing left to eat."

Now wrap up this whole shebang with the most
shocking statement you can find from a vegan,

take it out of any context of course, and
show how insane they really are...

"you just gotta step the f—ck up or you really
don’t deserve to live on this planet.”

Really focus on this one shocking thing that one vegan said, and totally ignore the countless shocking

things that every non-vegan pays for and supports
with every bite they take.

And if someone has the nerve to respond to
your claims with facts, make sure to

hang on to your ambiguous
wording with a death grip.

And whatever you do, don’t tell the truth.

Now I don’t know what your motivation was
for making this video. We already know that the

American Egg Board, with the USDA’s approval, paid
$33,000 to popular food bloggers for positive

pieces on the wonders of eggs.
So maybe you got a little financial boost.

I hope you enjoyed this instructional video.
Please share this video in the comments of

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to debunk this propaganda

and if you want some actual information
on veganism, check out some of my videos

linked here and more below.
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Monday, Wednesday, and some Fridays.

Now go live vegan, don’t buy the propaganda,
and I’ll see you soon.

Dr. Greger: How about our number one killer?

The number one killer of men and women. The number one reason you and everyone you love will die...

...heart disease....

...can be prevented, arrested, treated and cured with diet alone.