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(crowd clapping)
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♫ piano introduction ♫
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Hey, uh, Kate Monster, you're a monster right?
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Yeah!
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And you know Trekkie Monster my neighbour,
he's a monster.
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Right.
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So, are you two like, related?
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What?! Princeton! I find that racist!
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Oh! Oh! I'm sorry! I was just asking!
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Well! It's a touchy subject! No!
Not all monsters are related!
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Oh.
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You know you should be much more careful when
you're talking about the sensitive subject of race!
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Yeah... well.. Well, look who's talking!
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What do you mean?
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Well, you're the one who's always complaining
because your students are always cursing!
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Yeah, well they get that from rap.
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Ha ha ha ha!
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♫ You're a little bit racist ♫
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♫ Well you're a little bit too! ♫
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♫ I guess we're both a little bit racist ♫
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♫ Admitting it is not an easy thing to do... ♫
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♫ But I guess it's true ♫
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♫ Between me and you, I think ♫
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♫ Everyone's a little bit racist, sometimes
Doesn't mean we go around committing hate crimes ♫
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♫ Look around and you will find
No one's really color blind ♫
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♫ Maybe it's a fact
We all should face ♫
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♫ Everyone makes judgements
Based on race ♫
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Now not big judgments, like who to hire
or who to buy a newspaper from
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Nooo...
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No, just little judgments, like thinking that Mexican
busboys should learn to speak freaking English!
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Right!
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Everyone's a little bit racist, today.
So, everyone's a little bit racist, okay!
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Ethinic jokes might be uncouth,
But you laugh because they're based on truth.
-
Don't take them as personal attacks.
Everyone enjoys them - so relax!
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All right, stop me if you've heard this one.
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Okay!
-
There's a plane going down and there's only
one parachute. And there's a rabbi, a priest...
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And a black guy!
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Whatchoo talkin' 'bout Kate?
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Ooh...
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You were telling a black joke!
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Well, sure, Gary, but lots of people tell black jokes.
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I don't.
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Well, of course you don't, you're black!
But I bet you tell Polish jokes, right?
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Well, sure I do. Those stupid Polish people!
Ha ha ha ha!
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Hey guys! What are you laughing about?
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Racism!
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Cool!
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BRIAN! Come back here!
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You take out lecycuraburs!
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What's that mean?
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Um, recyclables.
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Ha ha ha ha!
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Hey, don't laugh at her!
How many languages do you speak?
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Oh, come off it, Brian!
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♫ Everyone's a little bit racist ♫
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I'm not!
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Oh no?
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Nope!
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♫ How many Oriental wives have you got? ♫
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What? Brian!
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♫ Brian, buddy, where you been?
The term is Asian-American! ♫
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I'm sorry honey! I love you!
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And I love you!
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But you're racist too.
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Yes! I know.
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♫ The Jews have all the money
And the whites have all the power ♫
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♫ And I'm always in taxi-cab
With driver who no shower! ♫
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Me too!
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Me too!
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I can't even get a taxi!
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♫ Everyone's a little bit racist, it's true.
But everyone is just about as racist as you! ♫
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♫ If we all could just admit
That we are racist, a little bit ♫
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♫ And everyone stopped being so PC
Maybe we could live in - harmony! ♫
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Evlyone's a ritter bit lacist!
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(crowd cheering)
