Arrival at Kraghammer - Critical Role RPG Show: Episode 1

Sam: I have a forgery kit, a poisoner's kit-

Marisha: Forge some thieves' tools real quick.

Sam: Climbing gear?

And a whip.

Liam: I have one of the earrings, and I say:

Vax: Scanlan, what exactly is the purpose for this little escapade,

and will it be ending shortly?

Sam: Can I reply?

Matt: You can, through the message-based ear enchantment.

Scanlan: Just trust me, that I have no idea what I'm doing.

(all laugh)

Matt: So, do you wish to pick one of the doors?

Travis: Do it.

Laura: Do it! Try it! And then run away.

Sam: Yeah, I'm gonna try one!

Matt: Okay, you have disadvantage on this.

Sam: Of course I do.

Travis: I love how we're just watching this happen.

Vax: Pike will mourn your death.

Matt: So roll twice, and we'll consider this a -

We'll say just a straight dexterity check.

Sam: Eleven, plus… zero?

Matt: You futz with the door for a good minute,

trying to bend a piece of wire you had,

thinking to forge some tumblers,

and eventually get to a point where you hear:

(tink)

And it broke.

(all laugh)

Sam: I can't do two spells at once,

so I will give it give it up and I'll make my way to the door.

Matt: Okay. The door is currently closed.

Sam: I become un-invisible and I cast Dimension Door.

Matt: All right.

Matt: You- (Whoosh.) -blink through this small,

purplish arcane doorway,

it brings you directly outside.

You guys are waiting, Scanlan just pops into view, ‘Ah!’

Scanlan: It was crazy in there!

People were farting everywhere!

(all laugh)

Tiberius: Really, Scanlan.

Scanlan: It was not me. They're building a throne room,

there were some locked doors, man I wish you could have been there,

it was exciting, but ultimately pointless.

So let's go down to the mines!

(All laugh.)

Vax: I would like to stress again that

none of these dwarves are our enemies, at all.

Vex: Soon, I'm sure.

Vax: We just want to go have some words with Greyspine.

Grog: And that we do not have our healer, at present.

Vax: Well we do, but she's very distracted,

and is not feeling herself.

Vex: She's very quiet.

Scanlan: She wanted to stay at the inn this morning.

Vax: She's feeling awfully BAFTA today, so.

(All laugh.)

Scanlan: Let's make our way to the mines, shall we?

Grog: To the mines, then, yeah.

Laura: Yes.

Vax: Let's go get this drunk dwarf!

Matt: Yes, the bard was doing a lockpick with no lockpicks.

He was fashioning it from wire.

Exciting but pointless! All right.

So, you, you make your way to the edge of the centre ring.

You find that there are long spiral staircases that move

to the bottom, where there are elevators

that bring you to the bottom floor.

The elevators are chain based, like a ratchet-type system

with two carvers there, of course.

As you approach one, eventually you talk with them,

they lead you down there, but once again they give you

a look of, “Watch your back!”

Laura: We point at the ale and give him a thumbs up!

Matt: They nod, and let you pass.

As you continue downward into the lower area,

you can see the red stone that lets a lot

of the atmospheric glow of Kraghammer is used less and less

and a lot more central torches are now in place; sconces.

Almost like the stone itself is either just rarer

the further down you go or has less of an illuminating power

the deeper into the earth.

Laura: (whispering) Okay, now I'm nervous.

Matt: You eventually reach into the center part of town.

You now see from where you are standing a number of large structures

in the very, very center of the bottom part

of the city of Kraghammer.

You can see there is a giant domed temple

that is made of like gold and bronze in the center.

It looks almost like a gargantuan gazebo that has

doorways on each side that is currently closed off.

No guards at it though.

You do see a number of other buildings.

There is a large, large, heavy, heavy looking foundry

far off to the left of you that has a little bit of smoke

that's coming off of it, but most

of it looks to be filtered into a giant, metallic funnel

that is then placed into the rock.

Almost like all the smoke based exhaust is being funneled

outside of the mountain.

That is the closest; that's the foundry.

And then to the right of you, you wander a bit

and you can begin to see that part of the mountainside

to the far right has that look of a strip mine,

or like a large portion of the minerals has been pulled away

and is currently being mined further.

So that looks like probably

one of the better places to look in looking for the Greyspine Quarry.

You eventually make your way to the outside of the quarry.

You now look down into three large pits that just descend

deeply into the side of the mountain.

This mine has been going for quite

some time and a large chunk of this looks like

it may be being prepped;

almost like the mine is what's growing Kraghammer.

The more they mine into the mountain,

the more they fill the mined area

with further city construction.

It's this self perpetuating cycle of expanding the city downward.

Currently in the quarry,

you can see there are a number of large, stone, dwarven buildings

in the edge of it, one of which is the largest of them all,

looks like it's made more of a black and red, iron aesthetic;

some of it's been oxidized a little bit and has that rough

and tumble, iron feel.

And that one has the most guards around the base of it.

The carvers are gathered entirely around it.

Matt: Looking down into the center of the quarry, you can see

towards the bottom there are a number of tunnels that lead into

the hillside of Cliffkeep Mountains proper, surrounding Kraghammer.

Grog: Let's go where the guards are.

Vex: Let's walk towards the guards.

Vax: Let's just do this directly, I think.

Scanlan: Just swords out.

Keyleth: Wait wait, wait. Before we go up, I take the cask of ale

and I grow some pretty flowers on it, and I make a nice pretty

bow and I shine it up a little.

Vax: Good work, hippy.

Percy: You're making a fruit basket?

Keyleth: No, I’m just - it looks attractive now.

Percy: Like a fruit basket. It looks like a fruit basket.

Keyleth: It does not look like a fruit basket.

It's not that ostentatious.

Percy: It's the "Ale of the Month" Club.

Vax: In her defense, they probably don't see flowers too often.

It's a nice touch.

Percy: That is very fair.

Orion: I'm going to take this opportunity to cast Stoneskin on myself.

Matt: Okay. Stoneskin is placed on you.

Sam: Are you a dwarf still?

Taliesin: Are you a dwarf made of stone?

Matt: You have not turned Alter Self off.

You are still a dwarf.

Orion: Yeah, that's fine.

Matt: Oh, Stoneskin is a concentration spell, so yes,

that would eliminate the Alter Self spell.

Okay, so you revert back to your dragon form, robed self,

but Stoneskin is in effect.

Matt: You using your, what's it called again?

Marisha: Druidcraft. It's really creative.

Matt: Druidcraft! Thank you.

The Prestidigitation for hippies.

Portions of the wood begin to sprout from the outside of this dark

wood barrel and form these entangled ivy vines that eventually

embrace the entirety of this cask with little buds of dark,

ruddy flowers.

Something that would definitely appeal to a dwarven aesthetic.

Marisha: That's hot.

Matt: You approach the guards, of which there are

eight currently at the front.

Laura: Can I see which one of them; use my perception to see

which one of them looks maybe the most interested or weakest -

Matt: Would be more of an insight.

Laura: Insight! Which one of them looks most interested in our party.

Matt: Yeah, go ahead and roll.

Laura: Oh, good. I thought that was a 1 but it's not.

It was a 13.

Matt: 13? Okay. Strangely enough they are fairly

distracted and after a rather long,

uneventful morning most of them are just used to being in armor

and waiting for business to go down.

There are a few along the edges that look a little more alert,

and one of them is looking occasionally down into the quarry.

Just keeping an eye on the established area.

Laura: Which one looks like the newest?

Matt: The newest of the bunch would be the one

that's on the far left that is looking down into the quarry as well.

He has a shaved head, has a small brownish beard

that looks like he's just starting to grow out

into a nice, long tuft.

Either it got shaved in some, I don't know,

terrible college dwarf accident.

You know part of his entry into some fraternity.

Grog: Dwarf culture. Dwarf Sigma Sigma.

Matt: It's a fairly thick tuft of unkempt brown beard

that goes about that far out.

It's just starting to be pulled in like tiny little scruffy braids.

It's not quite there and he probably gets a lot of shit for it

from the other dwarves.

But he seems to generally be looking at you guys.

Vax:: Okay, work your magic.

Grog: Yeah, do your thing… fuck these dwarves up.

Vex: No, well, I was just - I just wanted to know -

Scanlan: What are we trying to do?

Vex: We brought this gift. Um, hello!

And we just address all of them, maybe, right now, yeah?

Percy: She is better at this,

I am just going to let her do this.

Vex and Scanlan: Hello, hi!

Tiberius: Greetings and salutations!

Matt: The other guards reach back and grab their weapons.

One of them looking to you.

Tiberius: Oh, you don't need that.

Vex: I look over at the shaved-head one

and I hold his gaze for a little bit.

Vax: I give Vex a little push forward.

Dwarven guard: All right, what's your business?

Vex: Oh, yes, well... we are here to speak with Nostoc.

We brought a gift for him that's quite remarkable actually.

Matt: They curl up around the apparent barrel that Grog's holding.

They look wary of Grog but once they make note

of the barrel they all -

Guards: Ooooh.

Grog: Right? It’s the shit.

(all laugh)

Dwarven guard: I’ve heard of this,

but I have not seen anyone actually drink it.

There were long standing rumours that this even existed.

Vex: It exists.

Scanlan: And it's for Nostoc.

Dwarven guard: This is a Balgus original?

Vex: Yes.

Dwarven guard: Signed by himself I see on the burned, emblazoned wood.

I'll go talk to him!

Matt: And he heads inside of the building,

the doors close behind him.

The other guards encroach, keeping a very keen eye,

each one having a bead on the rest of your group.

About two minutes pass before he comes back,

opens the door and goes:

Dwarven guard: Nostoc will see you briefly,

but you best bring the gift.

I think that's what's holding his interest.

Vex: Of course.

Tiberius: Wonderful!

Dwarven guard: Inside, please.

Matt: And him and one other guard flank you guys as you enter,

making sure that you are not left without that appearance.

As you are led into the center of this portion

of the mine's main structure,

a series of long hallways, you can see there is this general smell

of soot and ash and broken stone dust in the air.

A hint of brimstone-ish kind of a smell.

It's not very pleasant, it's very well worn and pungent

for those of you who spend most of their time on the surface.

As you enter there is a general dust in the air,

a little light seems to peek through from the torches

that are placed up along the wall.

You can see this general haze amongst the interior here.

It is definitely a work environment at the base of an underground

dwarven establishment used to mine.

You are led further down the hallway.

It curves to the left and you are brought

into a large dwarven study.

You can see there are books on the walls,

a series of ledgers and paper stacks

on a large desk and at the center

there sits a dwarf with fiery red hair cut very short,

almost like a buzz-cut on the top,

with a long, long, long beard that is not braided

but just kept very smooth and very… not curly, not bunched,

it's a very straight beard.

He is very clean cut, he already has this

intimidating dark glare.

As you walk into the room he goes:

Nostoc Greyspine: Okay, you brought me a drink.

You have my attention.

What brings you to the mines?

Scanlan: We should have talked this through before.

Percy: Well, several things actually.

Several things bring us to the mine.

My name of course is

Percival Fredrickstein Von Musel Klossowski de Rolo III.

Everyone: You can call him Percy!

Matt: He raises his finger and goes:

Nostoc: You have not paid for your pleasantries yet.

Vex: Oh, of course, of course. Grog, if you would.

Liam: Tap that motherfucker!

Travis: I am assuming he had a goblet on the table.

Matt: As you pour it up he pulls under his desk

and pulls up a goblet.

As you fill it -

Nostoc: Top it off! Thank you!

Now put on the side of the desk!

Scanlan: Wait! Mister Greyspine -

Oh, okay, all right.

Matt: Puts it down.

Nostoc: (satisfied sigh)

Vex: Is it as amazing as we've heard?

Nostoc: It's pretty fucking good.

Matt: He takes another long drag, just -

while making sure you all watch him do this.

This goes on probably a little longer, the pageantry

of him drinking this in front of you is definitely a power play,

and he is establishing some sort of unspoken dominance in the room.

Eventually he finishes his tankard,

sets it down under the desk again.

Nostoc: Right… so. Where were we?

Percy: We were here to call upon your expertise.

We imagine that we are not the first strangers to

Kraghammer to come through -

Vex: -  in the last few weeks.

Percy: - in the last few weeks.

We believe one of our compatriots had some dealings with you,

perhaps not as… pleasant as the dealings we are hoping to have.

Scanlan: A lady, in fact.

Vex: A halfling.

Matt: At which point, as you say that,

he gets this grin to his face and goes:

Nostoc: Aye, I know of the one you speak.

Vex: Yes.

Nostoc: She is a strong-headed one, that one.

Percy: Yes.

Nostoc: She stepped on a few toes around this place.

Tiberius: Oh, is she clumsy?

Nostoc: One could say that, aye.

You say you are compatriots of hers?

Percy: We are here to mend any broken bridges, so to speak.

Keyleth: Or broken toes, if you will.

Nostoc: She certainly left a mess in her wake.

There's this strange vision quest she kept talking about.

It brought her into atmospheres…

portions of this city, portions of my business

that she has no right trespassing on.

She went against carver rules,

she broke away from partial arrest

and she went screaming down into the caverns of our mines

without my permission, blade drawn

on some crazed suicide mission.

Vex: You know what? We'll go after her.

We'll bring her out.

We'll get her out of your mines.

Nostoc: Great. I'd like that actually.

Vex: Good!

Percy: And we'd be happy to clear out anything unpleasant

that we happen to find in there in the meantime.

Tiberius: How did she look?

Grog: What?

Nostoc: She looked small and angry.

She seemed to have some weight to her.

She was a strong lass.

Tiberius: So not a looker is what you are saying.

Keyleth: That's not very nice.

Matt: And he gives you this strange look and goes:

Nostoc: I will not discuss the physical aesthetics of a halfling.

Sam: The dwarf is a feminist.

Vex: How much would this task be worth to you?

Obviously we are doing you quite a favour

and we brought you quite a gift!

Scanlan: This cost us a thousand gold.

Tiberius (quietly to Scanlan): Did it?

Nostoc: Obviously this lass means a lot to you, doesn't she?

Vex: No, no, no, but I know she is probably

wreaking havoc on your mines.

Vax: We've come to correct the wrongs

that she's done and come to bring her home.

Keyleth: It also sounds like there are some other

terrible things wreaking havoc on your mines.

Nostoc: There is nothing going on, we're fine.

We have everything under control,

we don't need your help for that.

If you want to find your friend,

go find her! If she is still alive.

If not, take her corpse back and leave.

Percy: It's not help, sir.

We are simply respecting you as a businessman.

And as a businessman I am sure

that you would disagree with unceremonious charity

whether it would be to give it or receive it.

We are making sure that our dealings with you

are fair and balanced.

Nostoc: I appreciate your offering.

You have bought your time.

Now, if you are here to go find your friend I’ll let you pass.

You may pass into the mine.

But - if at any moment you cross over

to any sort of thieving bullshite -

Matt: Looks over at you.

Nostoc: - I recommend that you fall down the same path

your friend likely did and get killed real quick.

I don't take kindly to those who cross on my business.

Percy: I doubt that we could find anything of more value

that what we have already brought you.

Vax: We are here to right wrongs and I promise you,

our business is finding her and returning home.

Nostoc: Then go.

Vex'ahlia: Is that our business?

Grog: Yeah, we are here to right wrongs and right lefts.

Percy: And write comment cards.

Marisha: Wait, before we dive into this mountain -

we know that there's ghouls and god knows what else down there.

Shouldn't we find out?

Tiberius: Yes we should. Maybe some arcane house could tell us

how to deal with these things.

Vex'ahlia: Yes, yes, yes, yes.

Do we have permission to enter within the next few days?

Obviously we might need to be prepared.

Tiberius: Yes do we have badges that we wear over -

so that they know -

Nostoc: I'll speak with the men. They’ll let you down.

If you come back, good on you.

I think our business here is done.

Percy: Yes.

Tiberius: Very good!

Matt: At which point you hear muffled in the distance

a loud ringing of a very loud bell.

At which point he kinda perks up a bit.

Nostoc: Our business here is done.

Please, shove off.

Scanlan: Which way do we go?

Matt: He looks over to the two other guards who are up front.

The two carvers say, “This way.”

Liam: While he is talking I take a flask out of my cloak and

approach the barrel and surreptitiously pour

a little bit of it into the flask.

Matt: Sleight of hand check.

Sam: Oh Jesus. You’re stealing beer?!

Orion: No, no, because we have to give it to those guards.

Sam: Fuck those guards, I can kill them all.

Travis: Roll, roll, roll you bastard, roll.

Laura: Can I talk to good old Nostoc while he's doing that?

Matt: He currently does not seem like

the talkative type at the moment,

you can certainly try.

Taliesin: I am going to make a fumble.

I am going to attempt to assist a slight of hand

with a bit of a fumble.

Matt: He has already rolled it.

Laura: Damn it. I am going to fall down.

In front of Nostoc.

Sam: Oh!

Liam: 13.

Sam: No chance.

Laura: I am going to fall down in front of Nostoc.

Liam: 13.

Marisha: Come on!

Taliesin: He is distracted by a bell.

Matt: As you fill your flask...

(all groan)

Matt: You hear this loud - (clears throat) -

Vex: Ow, ow, oh my ankle.

(all laugh)

Vex: It hurts so very much.

Matt: This is the first time you have witnessed

the pristine, delicate yet well trained palm of a dwarven hand

go straight to its forehead.

(all laugh)

Vax: I carry the flask up to his cup and refill it and say,

“In my kingdom when a deal is set we drink together.

And I would like, not much, but to just pour us all a drink

and agree, surely this cask is weeks worth of-”

Nostoc: Get out of my office.

Sam: Let’s just go.

Marisha: Take the flask.

Vax: I can see it is a cultural difference, my apologies.

Tiberius: Stop it. Just go! What are you doing?

Liam: You’re one to talk!

Orion: I am on the earring.

Matt: At which point, a second and a third bell starts going off

and the guards that are waiting for you guys -

they start leading you outside

and as you make your way outside the main building,

you can now hear voices shouting, down the quarry below.

Laura: I lean down to one of the guards and say:

Vex: What is that bell for?

Dwarf Guard: Something is flushing out of the quarry.

Laura: Flushing, what does that mean?

Dwarf Guard: We don't know.

Matt: At which point some of the guards are

motioning each other to follow and some of them

start going down to one of the tracks that leads down

to one of the nearest quarry below.

Taliesin: Just try and like practically usher

our guards in that direction,

since they seem to want to go in that direction.

Let’s see if we can push them in that direction.

Matt: Okay, you guys follow down towards the quarry,

you ask the guard that question and he goes:

Guard: I don't know, we have had quite a few

interesting things come through.

Vex: Like what? Oh, like what?

Travis: He already said.

Matt: He kinda swallows and says:

Guard: Things I can't describe.

Percy: Well, we can certainly help, lead on.

Marisha: Is there anybody running out?

Matt: Not yet. As you head halfway down the quarry walkway,

you begin seeing dwarves start running out

of one of the large quarry tunnels.

Marisha: I grab one of them.

Matt: Well, they are quite a distance from you.

You are still walking down the side.

They’re a good 100 feet from you.

Marisha: Okay.

Matt: They start running at you, you see blood

streaking down one of their faces.

Grog: Yes!

Matt: They're charging out, one of them has a weapon and is limping,

and you start seeing small green scampering things rushing through.

1, 2, 3, 4, 6, 10, goblins come rushing out of the tunnel.

Marisha: Oh, shit!

Scanlan: Aah, I don’t like these guys.

Marisha: Don’t you have a family history or something?

Laura: We should attack them! I string my bow.

Matt: The three dwarves that are running out, one of them gets

hacked down by one of the goblins and jumps on them

and is tearing his neck.

Taliesin: I take a shot. Right now.

Laura: I take a shot. I shoot it!

Matt: Okay, both you guys roll -

Liam: I throw a dagger.

Matt: You throw a dagger?

Liam: Yeah.

Matt: Three of you, roll for attack.

Taliesin: 19.

Laura: 15.

Orion: Is there a clear area with just a bunch of goblins running?

Matt: There is an open, almost like a funnel towards the tunnel.

Orion: I’m gonna throw a little fireball, right there.

Where those guys are.

Matt: Okay, so you guys you all hit from this distance

because goblins are puny little things.

They are still a little small to see but you are all

pretty well trained and pretty honed with your aim.

You fire, simultaneously, gunshots echo through the hallway,

arrows, flying dagger, you see three goblins

just fall off a nearby dwarf who goes:

Dwarf: Unh, thank -

Matt: - at which point a large fireball explodes,

killing off about 10 or so of the goblins.

And probably 2 of the dwarves.

Tiberius: I am sorry about that.

Matt: At which point, the guards kinda stopped.

Scanlan: Did you do that?

Tiberius: Yeah.

Scanlan: Fuck.

Matt: And they they start looking around and

they see you pull out your weapons and they all

take a step back and realise

they don't want to die either.

Guard: Well go, if you’re going to help, go!

Percy: We run straight in.

Matt: With you guys charging in, you can now see

a handful more goblins are rushing out.

They are like running really fast, sprinting -

Keyleth: I throw Entangle up, in the distance

where they’re coming from.

Matt: Okay, what’s the radius on that?

Marisha: Like a hundred feet.

Matt: That's the range. What is the radius?

Marisha: Oh, 20 foot radius.

Matt: 20 foot radius. Okay.

So you find a portion of the central part

where the things exit from the tunnel and

you see these strange reddish vines begin

to protrude and to begin to grab

nearby goblins and pull them up in this massive,

weird vine creature.

At which point you hear - (stomp stomp) - and you now see two

larger ogre-like creatures come storming out.

Keyleth: Oh, shit!

Tiberius: Wonderful!

Laura: Ogres?

Matt: Everyone roll initiative.

(all cheer)

Marisha: Oh, fuck. Goddammit.

Orion: Fuck yeah.

Travis: Take it!

Matt: All right, do we have initiatives 25 to 20?

Taliesin: 27.

Marisha: Holy shit! You rolled a 20?

Taliesin: I rolled a 20 plus 7.

Orion: 21.

Laura: Oh I didn't roll yet. Wait, wait! I didn't roll yet.

Matt: Okay, 21 you said?

Orion: I have 21.

Matt: 21 for Tiberius.

What did you get?

One?

Awww.

Marisha: Oh, I rolled a 2.

Liam: Well, wait. It's 6 with the plus.

Scanlan: Fellows. I don't like goblins.

Laura: 18.

Matt: You now see Scanlan, who’s usually a jovial individual,

his eyes begin to tense with fury.

Scanlan: I don't like goblins.

Keyleth: Is there anything that you know?

Scanlan: No, they will all die. Don't spare any of them.

Travis: Copy that.

Laura: 18.

Matt: All right, so we have -

Travis: 18 too.

Taliesin: 27!

Laura: What?!

Travis: Yeah, buddy.

Taliesin: I have 27 initiative.

Matt: 15 to 10? 10 to 5? 6.

Taliesin: Wow, oh my god.

Sam: I got a three.

Matt: Okay. (laughs) All right.

Marisha: 4.

Liam: It was a sudden attack, man.

Sam: We weren't ready.

Matt: You got a 3.

Marisha: To be fair I just cast entangle. It kinda works.

I'm distracted holding entangle.

Matt: Yeah, it's fine. All right.

And then we have Scanlan.

I'll get you guys in placement here,

as your bear is currently back at the inn.

Laura: He is still?

Matt: Unless you wanted to bring him along.

Taliesin: I thought we brought him along.

Laura: Well, I thought I brought him.

I should have mentioned that.

Matt: All right, we'll say you brought him along.

Laura: Okay.

Matt: That's fine.

Laura: I'm sorry, I should have emphasized that more.

Matt: Do keep in mind... That's all right.

Those of you going first we're going to keep you on the field here.

Laura: Oh, god.

Matt: A number of goblins that are currently held over here.

Sam: 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10.

Laura: They're easy. Goblins are easy.

Orcs, orcs are not.

Travis: Yeah, those are mine.

Liam: Ogres.

Laura: Ogres?!

Matt: All righty. So top of the round, Percy you're up.

Percy: I'm sitting down and I'm busting out Bad News.

Marisha: Bust out Bad News!

Matt: Okay. So Percy stops just as he gets to the quarry,

a little bit elevated, and he pulls out

from a small sack on his back this large elongated contraption,

this weird construction that looks similar to

the Pepperbox he usually carries,

but much larger and cumbersome.

He sets it up on the ground with a small stand at the front

and preps itself with a visual point.

Percy: Ogre.

Matt: Ogre back here?

Percy: Yup.

Matt: All right, go ahead and roll for your attack with Bad News.

Marisha: Have you used it before?

Taliesin: Nope, first time.

Matt: His own tinkered construction, Bad News.

Taliesin: That's a... 30 attack.

Matt: Yup, that'll do it. Go ahead and roll damage.

Marisha: Does that critical for you?

Taliesin: 19 actually might.

Matt: Natural 19?

Taliesin: Natural 19.

Matt: Yeah, that should critical for you.

Taliesin: That does critical for me.

I've never criticaled with this either.

What does that mean?

Matt: That means the damage dice you double.

Taliesin: Oh, perfect.

Matt: So, roll for damage, double that,

and add your modifier after that.

Marisha: Come on, come on, come on!

Big money, no whammies.

Yeah! Hell yeah!

Taliesin: 22, 23, 24, 25, 26.

27 points of damage.

Travis: Get after it, big man!

Marisha: Is that doubled?

Taliesin: That's doubled.

Matt: All right, so.

You guys hear this cacophonous (explosion),

this large blasting sound, a flash of blue energy and sparks

shoot out the back of the weapon.

It actually lifts Percy off the ground for a second

and he shifts himself from the sheer blast.

Laura: Woah!

Taliesin: I built a sniper rifle.

Matt: This streaking, heated bullet, almost reddish, white hot,

goes cascading through the air,

plunges into the side of the ogre's shoulder

with a smattering of blood splattering against the cave behind it.

It's actually moved back a step and has to catch itself.

Slams its club into the ground.

That ends your turn?

Taliesin: I can't do anything after that.

That's just reload.

Matt: All right, Tiberius you're up.

Orion: I move within 60 feet of those big fellows.

Taliesin: Bad News travels far and fast.

Marisha: Nothing travels faster.

Matt: This is the entanglement by the way.

Laura: Oh, okay.

Orion: Right before there.

Matt: Everything there is kinda fighting from the entanglement.

Orion: Great.

Matt: Most of these goblins are currently inside of it.

Orion: I'm gonna shoot a Scorching Ray at the big guy.

Matt: Both of them?

Sam: He said he moved - he moved within 60 feet of them.

Matt: So, you moved up to here? All righty.

Marisha: And they're all entangled, yeah?

Orion: That's good right there.

Marisha: Still have Entagle up.

Matt: These guys here are entangled.

These front goblins are not.

Scorching ray you said at which ones?

Orion: Actually, oh there's a bunch of those dudes, aren't there?

I'm gonna do a fireball instead.

Right in the center of the juiciness where

I can get a couple little guys and both the big guys.

Matt: All right, so I'd probably about there would be where you'd want it.

Orion: I'm gonna do that, and I'm gonna spend

two sorcerer points immediately to do quickening spell

and do another spell right after that.

Matt: Okay. So as you rush up, you pull back your hand

and you see the arcane red energy begin to flow in your palm.

You then throw the beam out, and it arcs, slams into the center,

and explodes hitting each of these five goblins

and the two ogres.

What's your DC on your spell?

Orion: My DC on my spell is...

Matt: Top of your spell page. On the right.

Orion: Oh! Wait. Oh! Seventeen, sorry.

Matt: Seventeen, okay. Wow! The two ogres actually make their saving throws.

Laura: Ugh!

Marisha: Boo!

Matt: They got eighteen and a nineteen.

Travis: Roll crappier, ogres!

Matt: The goblins, however, all disintegrate.

Laura: All of them?

Matt: There's no way they're gonna survive the damage you -

they just (poof noise).

You see this hint of a red ash mist just go, "Eee!"

where they once were, and they are all turned to black nothingness.

However, roll damage for the ogres.

They get half damage 'cause they made their reflex save.

Orion: Yeah.

Matt: So 8d6 damage.

Sam: 8d6.

Sam: Seven. Eight, nine, ten, eleven, twelve, thirteen,

fourteen, fifteen, sixteen, seventeen, eighteen,

nineteen, twenty one, twenty two, twenty three,

twenty four, twenty five, twenty six, twenty seven!

Travis: What?

Matt: Twenty seven, so half that.

Matt: Okay, so as the blast of fire dissipates,

you can see one of the ogres is now burnt on half of its chest.

Laura: Yeah, he is.

Matt: Looking a little rough.

There's blood streaking down from the side of his face

where the shrapnel got thrown at him.

And the other ogre’s looking okay.

Tiberius: He's a large creature isn't he?

Matt: Yes.

Orion: I'm gonna use my second spell and do Telekinesis

and pick one up and try to hurl him into the other one.

Matt: Okay.

Which one? The one left here?

Orion: The one that's beaten up already.

Sam: I'm hard right now!

(all laugh)

Matt: He does fail his saving throw.

Laura: That's just your flute.

Sam: Yes.

Matt: So you lift him up in the air and throw him into that.

Travis: Strangely aroused by your flute.

Matt: That ogre is knocked prone by the impact.

All: Yeah!

Matt: The other one is also knocked prone.

(all cheer)

Matt: Before just (splat noise) into the wall,

both of them slam to the ground.

Marisha: With my vines, I make sure my vines really grapple him.

Orion: I turn to Grog:

Tiberius: They're all yours buddy!

Matt: Go ahead and roll 2d6 impact damage for the force of the throw.

Tiberius: Sweet! Impact damage?

Orion: Ten.

Matt: Ten damage to each of them?

Orion: Yeah.

Matt: All right. Both of the ogres are now on the ground - (grunts) -

reeling from the impact.

That brings us to Grog and Vex going simultaneously.

Grog: Ladies first.

Laura: Oh! Well, all right.

I'm gonna cast Hunter's Mark on the most damaged one.

Matt: Okay, that'd be this one here.

Laura: All right. And then I'm going to shoot lightning arrow.

Matt: All right. Do you want to move a little closer?

Laura: Yes, I do.

Matt: All right.

Matt: So, that would put you right there.

Laura: All right, cool.

I'm gonna shoot lightning arrow at them.

Matt: Okay. So, you pull out your arrow and as you pull it back,

a little bit of energy courses through your fingers,

strikes through your arrow.

You can now see this crackling energy as

you're pulling it taut in your bow.

You let it loose. Go ahead and roll for attack.

Laura: Okay! Twenty one!

Matt: Twenty one hits.

Laura: All right. And then I do... something else.

1d8. Right?

Matt: Yep. You do the damage of the arrow

plus the damage of the spell.

Laura: Holey-moley! So that's this.

Thirteen for the arrow and then 4d8 for the spell.

Laura: Eight. Four- twelve. Plus three, fifteen. Seventeen!

Matt: Seventeen. Okay. The ogre that's been beaten,

blasted by the fireball, it's getting up - (grunt).

It grabs its club, and it begins to get up on one leg

as the lightning arrow slams into its chest.

You can see it hits.

Looks down for a second,

and then the charge pulses through its entire torso.

As it does, it screams out, "Argh!" into the cavern,

its whole muscle system locks tight

and it falls forward again, onto its chest,

smoke rising off of its whole upper area,

unmoving, on the ground.

He is gone.

Travis: Dang! Come on now!

Marisha: Fuck him up.

Laura: Yes! And then the other one takes 2d8

if he fails his saving throw.

Matt: Which, with a one, he does.

Laura: Yes! Oh, he fails it so good.

(all laugh)

Matt: So, go ahead a roll damage for other ogre.

Laura: Two... ten.

Matt: Ten damage. Nice. So as he falls to the ground, the arc

arcs over to the other one who drops his club for a second.

Picks it up angrily.

Laura: I can reassign my Hunter's Mark to him now?

Matt: You can.

Laura: Yes.

Matt: Yes, all right That brings us to...

Laura: Oh, my Hunter's Mark!

I didn't do my Hunter's Mark damage.

But it doesn't matter. He's dead.

Matt: It doesn't matter. You killed him.

Laura: All right, cool.

(all laugh)

Matt: So you just ultra killed him!

(valley girl voice) He is so dead. Oh my god.

This ogre is done.

(normal voice) All right. So the other ogre's angry.

It's now the goblins' turn.

These goblins rush up. They are just dashing forward.

Marisha: (valley girl voice) Oh my god, Becky, they are so dead.

Taliesin: (valley girl voice) They’re just like, dead.

Matt: This one moves around, and this one runs around to there.

No attacks.

Everyone make an insight check.

Sam: Insight check? Oh shit.

Marisha: What happened? Why are we doing this?

Taliesin: I literally get a 1.

Travis: (sings) Natural 20!

On an insight check.

Marisha: 20 total. 20.

Laura: 22.

Sam: 4.

Matt: All right.

Taliesin: Natural 1.

I'm really not paying attention.

Matt: You're dealing with the fact that

you just fired your gun for the first time

and it kinda burned your hands a little.

You're like "Ugh!"

Sam: Grog.

Matt: Grog -

Travis: Recites poetry.

(all laugh)

Matt: Grog is familiar with one thing:

fear in the eyes of his enemies.

Looking at these goblins, they're not charging to attack.

The attacks seem to be instinctual.

They are -

Marisha: They're running.

Matt: Running.

Marisha: Oh no!

Matt: They are scared.

Laura: Yes!

Matt: They are fleeing from something.

Sam: From the ogres?

Travis: Something behind the ogres.

Laura: Oh no.

Scanlan: May I make a request that you kill them anyway?

Grog: It's like playing croquet at this point, so yes.

(all laugh)

Matt: Grog, it's your turn.

Grog: I would like to RAGE!

And I would like to move to the right

of all those stinking goblins!

Matt: Right over here?

Travis: Yeah, a little more to the right,

yeah a little more,

yeah keep going,

all the way flanking it there -

yeah, yeah.

Matt: All righty.

Grog: Yeah, and then I would like to give them

the cleanest shave possible with my greataxe.

(all laugh)

Matt: All right. Go ahead and roll for attack on the first one.

Laura: Oh yeah, that's a good one!

Travis: Eighteen plus 8… that's 26?

Matt: That definitively hits.

Travis: Word.

Matt: Go ahead and roll damage.

Travis: Oh, damage, crap.

Liam: (sings) Decapitation!

Travis: 2 plus the 4...

13!

Matt: 13? Okay. So, as you rush up, you bring your axe

into the first goblin to your right - (whoosh) - clean.

You don't even feel resistance.

Travis: Hey!

Matt: You hear this little (wheeze) sound as this being is bisected.

Grog: Oh, that was cute.

Matt: Its head and upper torso just rolling off

to the side before rolling to a stop.

However, the inertia of your axe still keeps through

to the one on the other side of you.

Go ahead and roll for your second attack on that.

Travis: 21!

Matt: Also hits, go ahead and roll damage.

Travis: Oh, that's… was 8 plus 7 is... 15!

Matt: As you cleave through the first goblin, you swing around,

another goblin looks up at you, scared,

and pulls a dagger out with its gnarled tongue, (hisses),

at which point the ax embeds itself

straight into its face.

Its angry face goes, "G-agh!" and

just falls slack against your blade.

You lift backward,

and it's stuck to the edge of your axe.

(all laugh)

Matt: Just limply dangling against-

you shake it off a little bit.

Grog: Double prizes! Yeah!

Matt: Great. That ends your turn.

The thing about Rage is that you can use your bonus action

for a third attack.

Travis: No.

Matt: If you wanted to do a frenzy action,

but you don't need to.

That brings us to the ogre's turn.

The ogre gets up, let's see if it makes

its saving throw for an attempt to get out.

It does with an 18.

However, the ogre - it gets about that far,

it’s going to make a double move.

Laura: Double move?!

Taliesin: He's running.

Marisha: I still have entangle up.

Matt: I know. He managed to resist it.

Laura: He saved against it.

Travis: He was on the ogre track team in college.

Matt: It's a big ogre.

Marisha: Poop.

Matt: All right, the ogre takes his full turn

to get up in melee with you guys.

It does not have its attack since

it used its full movement there.

And once again you see as it's lumbering forward,

it also has this look in its eye of desperation.

Sam: Oh crap.

Matt: Now it is Vax's go.

Liam: My sister's right in the face of the ogre, correct?

Matt: Correct.

Liam: Excellent. So, I'm going to take a run towards my sister,

since she's right close to him, he's distracted,

so I'm going to turn just as I get to her,

so my back presses against hers and swing around

and sneak attack two daggers up in his belly.

Vex: We've practiced this, I turn.

(all laugh)

Matt: All right. So as you dodge to the side

just this blur of shadow and speed,

you just coast up to the side of your sister,

dagger both plunge towards the side

of the ogre, go ahead roll for an attack.

Liam: All right. One.

And then the other one I do a poison dagger,

gets a (singing) 20!

Travis: Oh, put it on him brother!

Matt: All right.

Liam: That is dagger of venom, 1d4 - 3, plus 2 is 5,

and then is the sneak attack damage go with - ?

Matt: Yeah it does because you have another ally adjacent to it.

Liam: Right, fine.

Matt: You don't get advantage on the attack roll

but you can still do the sneak attack.

Liam: Critical hit, too, as well, wouldn't it?

Matt: Yeah! You can multiply the sneak attack damage.

Liam: So 5, plus- and the double goes to the sneak attack damage?

Matt: It does. Modifiers don't double,

but any dice you roll double.

Liam: 9, 15...

Matt: In my game.

(clicks tongue)

Liam: So 30 plus, uh, 5, 35.

Travis: Damn!

Matt: 35 damage.

Orion: Yeah!

Liam: Plus poison.

Matt: The poison's not going to factor in.

Liam: Okay.

Matt: You swing past her, both blades

jam right into the side of its rib cage.

You hear it howl out in pain.

As it does, you twist the daggers

in a way where both blades are now

going in two different directions,

and you carve out a section of its entire abdomen.

All: Ugh!

Matt : As you do, the flesh, almost like whale blubber,

just - (splat) - sloughs off the sides of it.

Organs spill out, intestines, and it kinda looks down

and tries to pull them back in.

(panicked groaning)

At which point you see the color draining from its face,

and you just kinda lean up and kick it down.

The ogre - (groans) - and falls to the ground lifeless...

destroyed.

(all laugh and cheer)

Taliesin: You gave him just enough time to regret

everything that had ever happened.

Matt: Yes.

Taliesin: Well done... bad life choices.

Matt: That brings us to Keyleth.

Marisha: (as the ogre) I didn’t call mom enough.

I should’ve called mom.

Matt: There are two goblins left.

Marisha: Okay. I do a quick sprint jog up kinda up towards Grog

and go (boof) and bring up a big stone wall.

Right where that entrance is.

Matt: Right here?

Marisha: No. Like, right where things are pouring out.

Matt: Right, here?

Marisha: Yeah.

Matt: All right, Wall of Stone.

Marisha: Wall of Stone... boom.

Matt: All right.

A giant wall of stone now completely seals off

that part of the mine.

Tiberius: You closed it off?

Keyleth: I closed it off.

We don't know what’s in there,

we should talk about this for a second,

and I bought us some time.

I'm sure it’s going to try to beat

through that door in a  second.

Matt: I'm going to say that you moved

up to there with your movement.

All right, I’d say probably over here,

not right next to the goblins and

that will give you enough range.

Okay, so the all of stone - (boom)

Marisha: Are there any guards around still?

Any dwarven guards.

Matt: They are all just watching you do this now.

They don't want to put their lives at risk,

and you guys seem intent on getting into the middle of this battle,

so they are just going to sit back and let you do it.

Marisha: I throw up my wall and turn around and I say:

Keyleth: What’s coming?!

Tell us! You know what’s coming!

What’s coming!?

Matt: Make an intimidation check.

Laura: Keyleth, you are so hard core.

Marisha: I'm not good at this.

Sam: You speak goblin?

Marisha: [sadly] Oh, four.

(all laugh and groan)

Taliesin: Make a pity roll.

Matt: A very gentle attempt at intimidation,

however, the message gets across.

The guards look at you, taken off guard.

Keyleth: We are about to die.

It is in your best interest to tell us.

Guards: We don't know! It’s been different things.

Strange abominations.

It’s hard to describe. They’re -

- put together.

Something’s making things down there.

Keyleth: What kind of things? From where?

Matt: As they’re talking you hear a (boom) against the stone.

Travis: I bring out my blade.

Matt: So, the stone cracks, and you can see a noticeable crack

and an audible - (cracking noise).

Liam: I'm running right now diagonally towards the wall

and I press against the wall.

Laura: Oh, good call.

I do the same thing on the other side.

Matt: Okay, so you come over here,

do you want to bring Trinket with you?

Laura: Yeah!

Matt: All right.

Taliesin: You're all so fancy.

Marisha: I cast Stoneskin on myself.

Vex: I’m stealthing, I’m stealthing.

Matt: Roll stealth both of you.

Orion: How tall are the walls? I mean the ceiling.

Mat: Oh, the ceiling right now is

the rest of Kraghammer for the most part.

Travis: Hundreds, hundreds.

Matt: Yeah, it is a huge ceiling.

Orion: I get within casting range.

Travis: What’s in the middle? Are those fires?

Matt: These are braziers here.

By the way, Stoneskin goes, this disappears.

Travis: The entanglement?

Matt: Yeah, the entanglement is gone.

But there are minecarts, some rocks,

there is a smashed cart over here

from when the ogre barreled through.

This is just a piece of stone

that rises about 15 feet,

and these are both braziers

for light in the center of the area.

So - it’s hundreds and hundreds of feet up.

You can look up to the very top of Kraghammer from here.

Orion: Okay, that’s fine.

Matt; So whatcha got?

Well, let’s see. So Keyleth.

That is your turn, Stoneskin and moving up.

So, anywhere else you want to go?

I mean, technically, right now we are not in combat.

Sam: Right. We are out of combat.

Matt: Briefly.

Travis: Yeah, we are waiting for the homecoming dance to start.

Taliesin: I'm breathing, taking aim at the wall,

just resetting everything.

Marisha: Can I move up behind that pillar?

Matt: Okay.

Taliesin: I'm staying far back at the moment.

Matt: So, back here.

Matt: Both of these goblins...

I'll just say that you guys end up taking them down.

It’s not even a question.

You step on them and crush them.

Travis: Are there any dwarves that we can say,

“Go get Ballsack and bring him down?”

(all laugh)

Matt: You can.

Laura: Oh yeah, Balgoos! Balgus.

Matt: Balgus? You just tell them,

"Get Balgus!" and they are like... "Who?"

Liam: Grab Ballsack!

Matt: Some of them have set crossbows up by the way.

They’re barreling down to get ready to fire

at whatever comes through.

BOOF! Another crack in the wall.

You can see the dust settle as the stone

cracks again and a large piece at the top tumbles off.

The stone wall’s probably not going to hold another impact.

Anybody else want to move anywhere?

Taliesin: Just taking aim.

Sam: I'll move up to the right near where Grog is.

And nobody has taken any damage yet, right?

All: No.

Matt: Not currently, no.

You guys have had a pretty clean sweep

into this battle, so far.

Sam: I can't inspire anybody here? Now?

Matt: You can inspire anybody.

Just give them a dice.

Sam: Can I inspire everyone?

Matt: You can spend all your uses to inspire as many people

as you have the uses of it.

Marisha: I still have mine that I haven't used yet.

Sam: I'll inspire Vex and Vax and Grog.

Matt: So, mark that you guys all have a d8 to expend on an

attack roll, or a saving throw.

Scanlan: (singing) I think you're really handsome and nice!

You're going to have inspiration dice!

(all laugh)

Travis: Thought you were gonna have a little -

Laura: I know, some beautiful song for us!

Wait, what for all of us? We all get a d8?

Matt: Each of you has to have a single d8 dice, inspiration dice.

The bardic inspiration is flowing through you

that you can use to add to an attack roll, not damage.

You can add it to an attack roll, a saving throw -

Scanlan: (plays tune on electric piano app)

(all laugh)

Matt: There you go. That’s what a shawm sounds like, apparently.

So you can use it on attack throw, a saving throw,

or an ability check. Any skill.

Tiberius, are you going to stay where you are,

are you moving anywhere?

Last chance.

Orion: Is that cover right there next to me?

Matt: Right over here? Yeah.

Orion: I'll get behind the cover.

Matt: Okay.

Orion: And I’m going to peek out and I'm gonna cast Blur.

Matt: Okay, Stoneskin goes away.

Orion: I can't do both?

Matt: Nope. They're both concentration spells.

Orion: Okay, I leave Stoneskin.

Matt: Okay, Stoneskin stays on.

At which point - (boom) - the stone breaks through

scattering across the ground.

You see immediately bursting through -

Travis: What the fuck is that?

Laura: What is it?

Matt: A bulbous, oversized, naga-like creature.

You've encountered a naga before, which is a large serpentine

creature with a humanoid head.

However, this one is swollen, it is bulbous.

The way it moves looks unnatural

and it has affixed to it not one,

not three, but five other different colored naga heads

that look to be stitched to its body.

Laura: Gross!

Matt: It is a seriously terrible abomination.

And as it just breaks through the stone -

(hisses and growls)

- all the heads rear back.

Marisha: Do naga heads do something if you look at them?

Matt: We're beginning back at the top of the initiative order.

Travis: Oh shit!

Laura: Wait wait wait! I got a question!

My Hunter's Mark, can I transfer it

to that thing or do I have to -

Matt: Correct, you can, yes.

Laura: Yes!

Matt: Because this still part of the encounter which that.

Laura: (Sings.) Sweet!

Matt: So that is now marked with the hunter's mark.

Percy, you're up first.

Taliesin: Do I have to take new aim or

can I have myself already trained on -

Matt: You've had a moment to train.

You haven't seen the creature until it just burst out

so it would take you a round to aim.

Taliesin: I'm taking my round to aim.

Matt: Okay, so you're aiming.

That brings us to Tiberius.

Orion: What did you just-

Taliesin: I just took aim. Took aim.

Just a gun.

Marisha: "Just" a gun.

Taliesin: This gun doesn't do anything fancy.

Just shoots really far, really hard.

Orion: Okay! I'll do a... Scorching Ray.

Matt: Scorching Ray, all right.

It makes a saving throw -

It does not!

Rolled a 2, so full damage on it.

Orion: So two for four... let's shoot two of them right now,

right, three of them?

Matt: It's an aimed ray attack?

Orion: Yeah.

Matt: Then you have to roll for the attack.

So, roll a d20 and add your -

Travis: Roll high, roll high.

Matt: Top of your spell page.

Laura: Big roll, big roll, big roll.

Matt: Top of your spell page.

Orion: Oh! That's 23.

Matt: 23? 23 hits.

Orion: Yes, okay.

Matt: All right.

Orion: And then that's two d6… that's 12.

Matt: Twelve points of damage to the naga.

All right. That brings us to -

Orion: Wait. I roll for the second shot, right?

Matt: Yeah.

Orion: Okay, and that's a natural 20.

(all cheer)

Matt: Okay.

Okay, so you fire one beam off - (exploding sound) -

and it slams into the side of one of the naga heads.

The second you bring back and as you do there's a

flicker of arcane instability.

His arm shakes as he releases the surge of scorching

energy as it blasts into the side of the naga.

Also does not make a saving throw again!

Roll full damage.

Travis: Holy shit, Tiberius.

Taliesin: Oh my god.

Orion: Twelve.

Matt: Twelve?

Orion: Yeah.

Matt: Multiplied? Or did you roll a 12?

Orion: I rolled a 12.

Matt: Twelve. Times two. 24 points of damage.

Orion: Oh! I'm terrible at math!

Stay in school, kids!

(all laugh)

Matt: All right, so it just blasts into

the side of the naga heads.

Marisha: This is a good time to note our charity, 826 LA.

Sam: Not yet. Don't donate yet.

Sam: Donate next week.

Matt: Next week, there's things that you can donate to then.

All right, so that brings us to the end of Tiberius' turn.

You want to move at all, are you staying where you are?

Tiberius: I’ll stay right here.

Matt: All right Grog's up next, you're up.

Travis: Ladies first.

Laura: Oh! Oh! Me! Okay, I'm gonna shoot -

oh God, I didn't realise I was going so fast.

Matt: What did you roll for stealth by the way?

Laura: What?

Matt: What did you roll for stealth by the way?

Laura: I rolled a 20 for stealth!

Matt: Then yeah, he has no idea you're there.

Laura: Sweet!

Matt: He just sees the bear going - (bear growl)

Laura: Okay. Trinket's gonna hang out because

I don't want to - you know.

I'm going to shoot Conjure Barrage -

No, I'm just going to  shoot him twice.

Matt: All right, go for it!

Laura: All right.

Matt: Arrow once, arrow twice -

(arrow noises)

- Legolas style.

Laura: I am going to do the fire arrow thingy at it.

Matt: Okay, so using your bowstring.

Laura: The blazing bowstring, thank you Tiberius!

Matt: That he created and crafted!

All right so as you pull the second arrow out you nock it.

As you let it go it bursts into flames

arcing halfway through the air.

Laura: Okay.

Matt: What was your to hit roll on that?

Laura: 21?

Matt: 21 hits!

Laura: Okay.

Oh wait, that's a -

4 plus 7 is 11.

Sam: Don't forget your inspiration!

Matt: Well inspiration dice is to hit.

Sam: Oh, okay.

Laura: 11.

Matt: So, 11 points of damage.

Laura: For the first one, plus for the blazing bowstring

I can turn any arrow into a flaming arrow,

doing additional 10 fire damage.

Matt: Awesome.

Laura: So I'll roll that right now.

Matt: There you go.

Laura: Which is this. Which is a 7!

Matt: So an additional 7, so 18 total damage and that arrow -

(impact sound)

in the side of its body.

One of the serpent heads reels back from the pain.

Laura: Yeah! Screw you, Naga!

Matt: It begins snatching at where the arrow's now protruding from it,

trying to break it off.

Laura: And then I'm gonna roll again!

That's a 24!

Matt: That hits, go ahead and roll damage.

Laura: Awesome. That's an 8.

Matt: Grog, you're on deck.

Grog: I'm ready!

Laura: 7 plus 7 is 14!

Matt: 14 damage, all right. Both arrows -

(arrow impact sounds)

- sink into it. Definitely piercing through the scales a little bit,

but not sticking too deeply into its body;

it's definitely a hearty creature.

Grog, you're up!

Grog: Right, I would like to run around the other side of the rock,

raging, spit flying out my of my mouth!

And I would like to use the Chain of Returning,

also crafted by Tiberius,

attach it to the end of the great axe,

and throw it, from where I am, at the snake.

Matt: Okay.

Tiberius: Yeah!

Matt: He comes running around, rears back,

and takes his double-handed great axe and just lobs it overhand.

The chain, that's wrapped around your wrist,

keeping it attached to you, in some degree.

Go ahead and roll for the attack.

Travis: 8, 9, uh, 17!

Matt: 17?

It just hits!

Travis: All right, nice. That is... 15.

Matt: 15 points of damage.

As the axe embeds itself pretty deeply into the torso.

Laura: Oh! I didn't do my Hunter's Mark.

Matt: Roll Hunter's Mark damage right now.

Laura: Thank you. Thank you, chatroom!

(all laugh)

Laura: 6!

Matt: 6? Awesome. 6 damage. All right.

Travis: This says, 'An athletics-strength check is required

to pull the weapon free, the DC12?'

Matt: So, go ahead and roll an athletics check.

Travis: 12.

Matt: Roll a d20.

Travis: Oh, a d20.

Matt: It's a DC12.

Travis: Shit. Balls. Taint. 5.

Matt: Plus...

Travis: Plus what? Plus-

Matt: Plus your athletics!

Travis: Oh! Oh! That's bound to be good. Uh... 7! It's 12!

Matt: 12 is the DC! So yeah!

Travis: (elated laughter)

Matt: You pull back the chain and as you do,

the blade is resisting,

it's stuck in the torso and it actually - (whoosh) - and flies back,

and you just barely catch it.

Grog: Oh shit!

Marisha: I love your joy sounds!

Grog: Meant to do that!

Meant to do that of course.

Matt: Now it's its turn.

Sam: Oh Jesus.

Laura: Oh no!

Matt: (Slithering noises.)

Laura: (Nervous noises.) Oh no!

Grog: Yeah, yeah, come on!

Sam: What? Why me? No, that's not me, that's not me.

Matt: For its size, when it moves,

it moves in a burst of lightning energy.

It's too fast for its corpulent form.

As it goes behind to Keyleth and Tiberius,

it makes an attack with each of its five heads.

Two on Tiberius, three on Keyleth.

Remember, you guys have Stoneskin, so I believe

you have resistance against damage, right?

Orion: Oh, yes, I do.

Matt: All right. So. Against Keyleth, it's a natural 20.

Group: Oh no!

Matt: That's a 12 plus 7, that's gonna be a 19 to hit?

Marisha: Yeah.

Matt: And natural 20 again.

Marisha: What the fuck!

Matt: So, 2 critical hits, and a hit on you -

Travis: What is this bullshit?

Matt: - and on Tiberius, that's a 22 to hit.

And a 13 to hit.

Orion: One does, one does not.

Matt: Okay, cool.

Matt: So, against Keyleth, you take -

Marisha: I'm glad I cast Stoneskin.

Matt: I know. So you take half damage for these. Which is fine.

Marisha: Yeah.

Matt: So, you're looking at - that's 2 plus 4, that's 6, damage halved,

you take 3 damage.

Oh, sorry. 3 multiplied by 2 because it's a critical.

So you take 6 damage from the first strike.

Laura: That's nothing! 6 damage.

Matt: Not too bad. You take 7 damage from the second strike,

and another 6 damage from the 3rd strike.

Actually, it would have been 6, 4 and 6.

Because you have resistance on the damage 'cause of Stoneskin.

Marisha: 6, 4 and 6?

Matt: Yes. However, make a constitution saving throw.

As venom from the fangs of the Naga begin to

pulse into your bloodstream.

Marisha: Ah, I should have taken the poison resistance.

He talked me out of it.

Taliesin: Yeah, I talked her out of it.

Marisha: What am I - constitution.

Matt: Yeah, constitution saving throw.

Marisha: Fuck!

Matt: Natural 1?

Natural 1 on the constitution saving throw.

Laura: Oh no!

Marisha: It's a bad day.

Matt: You feel this burning pain pulse into your bloodstream,

as your whole body doubles over from the pain.

Sam: Keyleth dies in episode 1.

Matt: You suffer 31 points of poison damage.

Marisha: 31, on top of the 6, 4 and 6?

Matt: Yep.

Travis: Are you okay?

Matt: The poison damage is not halved

because it is not a physical attack on your body.

Laura: Is Keyleth unconscious?

Sam: No, she's ok.

Matt: Tiberius you take 13 points of damage halved by Stoneskin

so you take a total of seven.

And also make a constitution saving throw.

What'cha got?

Orion: It's a 16.

Matt: 16, you manage to physically resist

the poison in your system.

You feel that slight tinge, the muscles tense,

but then your dragonborn form begins to just

shrug off the effect of the venom.

Orion: Can I turn to him and blow fire out of my nostrils?

Matt: Sure.

Orion: That's what I do.

Matt: True dragonborn challenge.

That brings us to Vax.

Liam: Okay, I start jogging backwards.

Marisha: Took me down to 16 hit points.

Liam: And can I sneak attack while prone.

Matt: You're stealthed currently so you would

technically get a sneak attack

but you have to be in melee for you to get the other bonus.

So it would be sneak attack for this damage if you were to roll

or if you were to throw a dagger at it,

you would get the sneak attack.

Liam: Okay, so that means just one throw instead of two?

Matt: You can throw both daggers at it.

Liam: All right. I feel so inspired by Scanlan's bardic tunes -

Scanlan: (singing) Yeah!

Matt: You can add it after you make the roll by the way.

Laura: So if you do a really good roll then you don't need it.

Liam: Okay, 19 plus eleven is thirty.

Matt: And because you're a rogue isn't that critical for you?

Liam: Yeah. Oh, yeah.

Matt: Two criticals!

Liam: And the other one, the other one is a 16 plus, plus...

is a 26.

Matt: That also hits.

So you chuck both daggers out, they both arc around.

Liam:  I meant to say I was aiming at its eye,

the main head's eye.

Laura: No, you should've said that first.

Matt: For flavor it's fine. Just go ahead, it's fine.

Liam: All right, four.

Laura: Four!

Liam: Plus seven is eleven plus five...

18. 20. 20 times...

is 40 plus 4.

44, that's the first dagger?

Matt: Yeah, 44 damage.

Liam: 44.

Travis: Damn!

Matt: Rogues, man.

Marisha: Help me. Help.

Laura: That's just one dagger?

Liam: That's just one- 4 plus 2 is 6.

Is that sneak attack? No.

Matt: No, only one sneak attack per turn.

Liam: Okay.

Laura: 40 and then 6 on the other one.

Matt: All right, so one actually hit one of the heads,

one of the various naga heads directly into its face.

As it does  it goes through both eyes and you can see it begin

reeling from the attack.

It’s looking pretty rough actually.

Laura: Oh! Kill it!

Matt: You can see the stitches beginning to come apart at

some of the seams and you can see a black ichorous liquid

spill out from some of the suture marks.

Liam: And just a reminder the daggers, folks,

blink back to the belt on my waist.

(all laugh)

Matt: Because magic.

Magic rogue shit.

Matt: Keyleth, you're up.

Laura: Kill him, kill him!

Marisha: Okay, so I'm really upset, really hurting.

So out of anger I take my staff and I go - (bam) -

and I crack and do Thunderwave

pushing him back 15 feet.

Matt: All right.

Makes the saving throw.

But he gets pushed back, so he takes damage just half damage.

Marisha: Okay, 2d8. 6.

Matt: As you're setting up your gun

it gets slammed right point blank to you.

Marisha: Oh sorry.

Laura and Travis: No that's good!

Marisha: It takes 4 damage.

Matt: 4 damage, all righty.

Marisha: And then I'm going to turn into an eagle.

Sam: (laughs) As one does.

Matt: So we'll say for that, because I forgot to bring an eagle,

You're now a - (eagle sounds)

Marisha: And I -

I fly...

away.

Travis: Away.

(all laugh)

Orion: Away.

Keyleth: Far far away.

Tiberius: Where are you going?!

Laura: You got 4 damage, good job Keyleth.

Scanlan: Tell our story, Keyleth.

Marisha: And then I cry in the corner and

rock back and forth a little bit.

And that's my turn.

Matt: I forgot to mention you actually take half damage

for the saving throw for the venom

so you still would've taken

14 points of poison damage, so just mark that.

Orion: Okay.

Matt: It is half damage on a save.

Matt: All right, that brings us to Scanlan.

Sam: Can I bonus inspire myself?

Matt: Because you're Scanlan I'll say, yes.

(all laugh)

Matt: You have such a high opinion of yourself

that even you could inspire yourself.

So yes, why not.

Scanlan: (singing) It would help me to acquire some dice to inspire.

So I inspire myself first

and move 5 feet back so I'm on the same row as him.

Matt: There?

Sam: Not that far.

Matt: There.

Sam: Yes.

And them I'm going to cast Lightning Bolt at him.

Matt: Okay! Straight line that way?

Sam: Straight line, that way.

Matt: You don't have to roll to hit.

You just roll damage on that.

I make a saving throw.

Sam: Oh! I didn't even need to inspire.

Matt: What's your DC on the spell?

Top you your spell list.

Orion: 17.

Sam: Thank you.

Matt: 17? That's a failure on its saving throw.

Go ahead and roll 8d6.

Laura: 8d6?!

Kill him!

Matt: Bards. Gets spells from other classes.

Travis: If you kill, I will take a shit on this table.

Sam: 6, 7, 8, 9, 10 ,11, 12, 13, 14 -

Liam: It's gone.

Sam: 24!

Matt: 24 points of lightning damage.

Travis: No way.

Sam: Yes.

Marisha: Kill it, kill it.

Sam: (yells, turns into a sung note)

Matt: How do you want to do this?

(all yelling)

Marisha: Wait, wait! Is this the first time you've -

Sam: I've never killed anything before!

Travis: Never killed anything in two years!

Liam: Wait, wait.

For the people at home, we live to hear Matt say:

All: "How do you want to do this?"

Matt: I let the player describe their victory.

So, as you sing to yourself to bolster your arcane energy,

you release a sheer bolt of energy.

How do you want to do this?

Sam: The bolt of lightning begins in its tail and works its way up

through its spine,

slowly but painfully torturing it

as it slowly, slowly feels the effect

coursing through its evil body.

Matt: Because of your bardic ability to actually shape sound

from an arcane standpoint,

a lightning bolt should be an instant flash

of arcane energy, you actually cause it to crawl.

You control it as it begins to cascade up the torso

of this horrible abomination.

As it does you can see the bolts splinter and destroy

each suture wound as each of its begins to slough off

the rest of the torso until nothing is left but the single head

screaming into the air.

As the bolt makes its way up the neck,

its eyes burst out in a blast of energy.

Matt: And the body falls limp to the ground.

Sam: Can it have a lightning bolt shaped in an "S"?

Matt: A Scanlan shaped lightning bolt

is burned into the torso of the strange naga beast.

(all cheer)

Travis: Well done Scanlan, well done!

Matt: As the dust settles, the adrenalin still pumping

in your system Scanlan,

all the rest of the dwarves begin stepping down,

putting their crossbows down, looking down at the little gnome

that created a storm from its hands and one of them

pats him on the shoulder and goes:

Dwarf: Well - well done.

Scanlan: Thank you. Just promise me you'll tell Pike about this.

Dwarf: Okay?

Scanlan: Because it was really cool, right?

Dwarf: That was pretty cool.

Scanlan: Okay, good.

Matt: All the dwarves look into the tunnel that it came from

and the one that you spoke to earlier goes:

Dwarf: So… that's the kind of thing that's been coming out of there.

Vex: Lovely.

Keyleth: Thanks for the heads up.

Percy: That was really helpful.

Matt: We'll go ahead and leave the game there for the night.

(all cheer)

Matt: All right folks, well done.

Hope you guys had fun watching our first ever Critical Role.

That was a good time so we'll be here next week on Thursday.

7 o'clock though.

Laura: 7 pm.

Matt: Today was just a special early edition because

all of Geek and Sundry is going to SXSW.

Zac: Good Job, dude.

Matt: Dude, thank you, Zac.

Zac: This is fun, this is so much fun.

Marisha: Hell yeah!

Zac: This is the most fun I've had all week now

until I die of stress behind the camera.

Matt: Good! That's good.

Zac: So guys, I hate to end it so abruptly

but we're actually packing up the cameras

that are filming me now, our unit, everything, lights,

and getting on a plane and heading to SXSW.

We may stream tomorrow, we may not, we're flying blind,

we'll see what stuff looks like when we get there.

But thank you guys so much and we'll be back next week, 7 pm.

Matt: 7pm.

Zac: Next week guys, it’s gonna be great.

Matt: Thank you all for coming.