-
Hello, Jay.
-
Primus, do you notice anything
different about the aliens today?
-
Great Caesar's ball sack!
-
The zoo keepers have stolen
my seed and created ali-mens.
-
There's gotta be a better explanation,
and probably a better name.
-
There is another explanation!
-
Merchandising!
-
Great Caesar's ball sack.
-
Look at me!
-
I'm the human who never shuts
it up and always tries to escape!
-
(Horf) I'm a fool, look at me!
-
You insult me, jailor, and I--
-
(grunts)
-
Rome is falling.
-
Zoo visitors are buying many units.
-
It's a very well-made product.
-
(reading) Made in China?
-
Wow, they really are in every market now.
-
Rome rises again.
-
This item is also popular.
-
Probably because the dramatic human
-
is also in the daily mating shows.
-
I'm flattered.
-
Do not be too flattered.
-
There were requests for you to execute
more than only one sexual position.
-
But the inverted Trojan Horse
is my favorite.
-
Well, I'm open to something new.
-
I suppose we could
try the Greasy Catapult
-
or the Reverse Slave Girl.
-
That could be stimulating.
-
Or perhaps the Centaur Replunger.
-
Or Wookie Style?
-
(Horf) But we have a bigger problem.
-
Most human merchandise
is not selling well.
-
Ah!
-
We have the apathetic human's
pretentious spectacles.
-
Are your glasses even prescription?
-
They do seem like an affectation.
-
Really?
-
Like your cigarette holder?
-
Yeah, there aren't any
cigarettes here, Rita.
-
You're smoking air!
-
Be kind.
-
Smoking is an addiction.
It's tough to beat.
-
Shut it up!
-
We also have the innocent
human's pearl necklace.
-
(laughter) He just gave June
a pearl necklace, man!
-
Earl.
-
The idiot human's stupid shirt,
one size fits some.
-
Wolfbang was my metal band on Earth, man!
-
Awesome!
-
Unawesome.
-
We have sold only five stupid shirts!
-
We didn't sell even one on Earth, man.
-
Shut it up!
-
We also have the intellectual human's
constantly disapproving frown.
-
What?!
-
Observe.
-
(buzzing)
-
What a wonderful piece of technology.
-
I don't like it.
-
And the annoying human
who talks too much
-
is a little dolly that talks too much.
-
(doll) No way!
Absolutely not.
-
Okay, come on.
That is not cool.
-
(doll) That is not cool.
-
(laughter)
-
That dolly is awesome.
-
I agree.
-
The whiny quality of the dolly's
voice is very accurate.
-
Can we at least call it an action figure?
-
Yeah, more like "inaction" figure.
-
(doll and man) Okay, that's enough.
-
- (giggling)
- Oh, your sales must increase.
-
So be more interesting, humans!
-
Or you will all be in a mating show.
-
(whirring)
-
I've discovered something called BDSM.
-
OMFG.
-
Horf, come on, isn't a zoo
supposed to have the species
-
behaving normally and naturally?
-
Not if they're boring!
-
Okay, so you want us
to just act crazy and stupid
-
like a bunch of clowns,
like this is some kind of circus.
-
What is this "circus" you speak of?
It sounds interesting!
-
(circus music)
-
I'm so sorry, guys.
-
(honking)
-
I am humiliated, but amazed
you can juggle on a unicycle.
-
Yeah, riding a unicycle basically says,
-
"Hey, world.
I'm a total f*ckwad."
-
Yeah, what're you doing anyway?
-
I think Horf got confused
about the lion tamer role.
-
- (whips)
- (shrieks)
-
Holler your name, dude!
-
My name's Lionel
and I don't know how I got here.
-
(shrieks)
-
Thanks, Lionel.
-
(Lionel) I think I peed a little!
-
Is it bad that I'm totally enjoying this?
-
(June) Well, I'm really not enjoying this.
-
And this beard is so itchy!
-
You guys have it easy, man!
These boots ain't made
-
for the high-wire, man!
-
Shut it up and traverse the wire!
-
All right, I'm goin' already, man!
-
Ridiculous.
-
I'm embarrassed for them.
-
So what new position shall
we use in the mating show?
-
Perhaps the Cleveland Caesar?
-
Well, I thought I was supposed
to be the dominate one!
-
(muffled screams)
-
Yargh!
-
- (shrieking from above)
- No!
-
Lionel broke my fall,
but I don't think neither of us
-
doin' too good.
-
(Horf) Blast!
-
The idiot human is damaged.
-
Discount his merchandise by 20%.
-
[Captioned by Subtitle YouTube]
