I'm Uncomfortable! (And So Can You!)

Being uncomfortable is terrible and should be avoided... you know... if you never ever want to get better at anything, ever.

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Ashley Wylde is a queer and gender nonbinary writer, activist, and travel enthusiast. Wylde publishes YouTube videos weekly on her channel Ashley’s Wylde Life, and is the creator of The Gender Tag Project, a project exploring the complex ideas of sex, gender roles, gender identity, and gender expression, which has inspired over 750 individual videos responses.

Her work on The Gender Tag Project also sparked an invitation to speak at TEDxCSU 2016, and she continues to give speeches and facilitate workshops on the subject to university audiences.

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Hi everyone, my name is Ashley Wylde and

welcome to my channel, Ashley's Wild Life!

(music)

This week I want to talk about something

that's really fundamental to the way

that I think about the world and the way

that I approach my life.

There's a lot of talk about what is

desirable in the realm of comfort vs discomfort

and a lot of people say that
they don't want to be uncomfortable

and, hey, you know, I think that's fair.

Being uncomfortable's not fun,
that's part of why it's uncomfortable,

but there is a detail missing
somewhere in that equation

that I want to try to address.

The only place that growth
can come from is discomfort.

Think about going to the gym:

You break down your muscles
and then they grow back stronger.

You intentionally subject yourself
to physical discomfort

in order to become stronger physically.

It's pretty much the same with
emotional or mental discomfort.

There are things and situations
that are uncomfortable,

but sometimes avoiding them
means avoiding growth.

In my life I work really hard to

combat my tendency to avoid discomfort.

Discomfort avoidance is something I work

really hard to dismantle and undermine.

I don't like being uncomfortable,

I don't like being emotionally
uncomfortable,

I don't like being challenged
in my beliefs or ideas

I don't like it,
because it doesn't feel good,

but it helps me grow and I as a person

am individually committed
to my personal growth.

So, even though i don't enjoy it,

I welcome discomfort, because if you're

uncomfortable, you're learning something.

Those are some of my thoughts
about comfort and discomfort.

I don't know, maybe that
made sense to you,

maybe I'm a ramblin fool, who knows.

Six of one, half a dozen
of the other I guess.

Thank you all for watching and I'll see

you next Monday. Bye-bye!