Scientists Find Skeleton Of Nature's First Sexual Predator

Paleontologists believe the intact skeleton could shed light on the bizarre fetishes of this pervert dinosaur.

The scientific community is buzzing
following the announcement that archaeologists

in Argentina have uncovered the first complete skeleton

of the world`s oldest sexual predator.

According to the team of archaeologist

the discovery of a full skeleton of Pervatasaurus Leroy,

the first dinosaurs species known to stalk another

not for food but for sexual satisfaction

, could quote ‘…shed light on any number of

mysteries surrounding this ancient lecherous creature’

Joining us now from Argentina is the lead paleontologist on the dig,

Dr. Andrew Vaughn.

Hello.

Dr. Vaughn, the pervatasaurus looks a bit like the tyrannosaurus Rex

Are they two related?

Yes. They`re both members of the Thereped suborder,

but the pervatasaurus is smaller and much much creepier

Now, how did you and your team make this monumental discovery?

Oh, well, the skeleton was discovered in a dank,

subterranean cave far away from any of the other dinosaur fossils we excavated.

And the large number of well-preserved footprints

suggested the pervatasaurus spent the majority of its time there in a cave

just pacing back and forth alone.

So it was basically a solitary creature.

Oh, for the most part, yes.

The pervatasaurus seemed to only approach other dinosaurs

when they were in large groups which allowed the pervatasaurus

to stealthily creep between their bodies and rub himself against them.

It`s incredible.

All of my research indicates that it really liked mud and slick surfaces

and would often submerge half of its body in mud

while groping its own genitals and mumbling to himself.

Now, it was long thought, it was my understanding at least,

that the pervatasaurus was a carnivore.

Oh, that was a misconception.

By studying pervatasaurus fossilized faeces which we found neatly stacked

in a symmetric piles in a cave we discovered

that the pervatasaurus was in fact a herbivore.

So it was a scavenger of sorts then?

Oh yes. We have discovered drag marks near several caves

indicating the pervatasaurus likely lured smaller dinosaurs back to its cave,

but the lack of skeletons suggests

the pervatasaurus didn`t kill or eat them

but only watch them as it masturbated.

Well it`s remarkable! Thanks for being with us, Dr. Vaughn.

Congratulations on your find.

Thank you.

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