Who are you, really? The puzzle of personality
-
0:01 - 0:04What an intriguing
group of individuals you are ... -
0:06 - 0:07to a psychologist.
-
0:07 - 0:08(Laughter)
-
0:08 - 0:12I've had the opportunity
over the last couple of days -
0:12 - 0:14of listening in on some
of your conversations -
0:15 - 0:17and watching you interact with each other.
-
0:17 - 0:20And I think it's fair to say, already,
-
0:20 - 0:25that there are 47 people in this audience,
-
0:25 - 0:27at this moment,
-
0:27 - 0:32displaying psychological symptoms
I would like to discuss today. -
0:32 - 0:33(Laughter)
-
0:33 - 0:36And I thought you might
like to know who you are. -
0:36 - 0:37(Laughter)
-
0:37 - 0:39But instead of pointing at you,
-
0:39 - 0:42which would be gratuitous and intrusive,
-
0:43 - 0:46I thought I would tell you
a few facts and stories, -
0:46 - 0:49in which you may catch
a glimpse of yourself. -
0:50 - 0:54I'm in the field of research
known as personality psychology, -
0:54 - 0:58which is part of a larger
personality science -
0:58 - 1:03which spans the full spectrum,
from neurons to narratives. -
1:03 - 1:05And what we try to do,
-
1:06 - 1:07in our own way,
-
1:07 - 1:10is to make sense of how each of us --
-
1:11 - 1:12each of you --
-
1:12 - 1:15is, in certain respects,
-
1:15 - 1:16like all other people,
-
1:17 - 1:18like some other people
-
1:19 - 1:21and like no other person.
-
1:23 - 1:26Now, already you may
be saying of yourself, -
1:26 - 1:28"I'm not intriguing.
-
1:30 - 1:35I am the 46th most boring person
in the Western Hemisphere." -
1:36 - 1:38Or you may say of yourself,
-
1:38 - 1:40"I am intriguing,
-
1:41 - 1:45even if I am regarded by most people
as a great, thundering twit." -
1:45 - 1:46(Laughter)
-
1:46 - 1:52But it is your self-diagnosed boringness
and your inherent "twitiness" -
1:52 - 1:57that makes me, as a psychologist,
really fascinated by you. -
1:57 - 2:00So let me explain why this is so.
-
2:00 - 2:04One of the most influential approaches
in personality science -
2:04 - 2:06is known as trait psychology,
-
2:06 - 2:11and it aligns you along five dimensions
which are normally distributed, -
2:11 - 2:18and that describe universally held aspects
of difference between people. -
2:19 - 2:22They spell out the acronym OCEAN.
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2:22 - 2:25So, "O" stands for "open to experience,"
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2:25 - 2:28versus those who are more closed.
-
2:28 - 2:31"C" stands for "conscientiousness,"
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2:31 - 2:34in contrast to those with a more
lackadaisical approach to life. -
2:34 - 2:39"E" -- "extroversion," in contrast
to more introverted people. -
2:39 - 2:42"A" -- "agreeable individuals,"
-
2:42 - 2:45in contrast to those
decidedly not agreeable. -
2:46 - 2:48And "N" -- "neurotic individuals,"
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2:48 - 2:51in contrast to those who are more stable.
-
2:52 - 2:56All of these dimensions have
implications for our well-being, -
2:56 - 2:58for how our life goes.
-
2:59 - 3:01And so we know that, for example,
-
3:01 - 3:06openness and conscientiousness
are very good predictors of life success, -
3:07 - 3:11but the open people achieve that success
through being audacious -
3:11 - 3:13and, occasionally, odd.
-
3:14 - 3:18The conscientious people
achieve it through sticking to deadlines, -
3:18 - 3:22to persevering, as well as
having some passion. -
3:24 - 3:28Extroversion and agreeableness
are both conducive -
3:28 - 3:30to working well with people.
-
3:31 - 3:34Extroverts, for example,
I find intriguing. -
3:34 - 3:37With my classes, I sometimes
give them a basic fact -
3:37 - 3:40that might be revealing
with respect to their personality: -
3:40 - 3:45I tell them that it is virtually
impossible for adults -
3:45 - 3:49to lick the outside of their own elbow.
-
3:49 - 3:51(Laughter)
-
3:51 - 3:52Did you know that?
-
3:54 - 3:58Already, some of you have tried
to lick the outside of your own elbow. -
3:58 - 3:59But extroverts amongst you
-
4:00 - 4:02are probably those
who have not only tried, -
4:02 - 4:05but they have successfully
licked the elbow -
4:05 - 4:06of the person sitting next to them.
-
4:06 - 4:07(Laughter)
-
4:07 - 4:09Those are the extroverts.
-
4:09 - 4:13Let me deal in a bit more detail
with extroversion, -
4:13 - 4:16because it's consequential
and it's intriguing, -
4:16 - 4:19and it helps us understand
what I call our three natures. -
4:19 - 4:23First, our biogenic nature --
our neurophysiology. -
4:23 - 4:26Second, our sociogenic or second nature,
-
4:26 - 4:30which has to do with the cultural
and social aspects of our lives. -
4:31 - 4:38And third, what makes you
individually you -- idiosyncratic -- -
4:38 - 4:41what I call your "idiogenic" nature.
-
4:41 - 4:42Let me explain.
-
4:45 - 4:48One of the things that characterizes
extroverts is they need stimulation. -
4:49 - 4:54And that stimulation can be achieved
by finding things that are exciting: -
4:54 - 4:58loud noises, parties
and social events here at TED -- -
4:58 - 5:01you see the extroverts
forming a magnetic core. -
5:01 - 5:03They all gather together.
-
5:03 - 5:04And I've seen you.
-
5:04 - 5:07The introverts are more likely
to spend time in the quiet spaces -
5:08 - 5:09up on the second floor,
-
5:09 - 5:13where they are able
to reduce stimulation -- -
5:13 - 5:17and may be misconstrued
as being antisocial, -
5:17 - 5:20but you're not necessarily antisocial.
-
5:21 - 5:24It may be that you simply realize
that you do better -
5:25 - 5:30when you have a chance
to lower that level of stimulation. -
5:31 - 5:35Sometimes it's an internal
stimulant, from your body. -
5:35 - 5:40Caffeine, for example, works much better
with extroverts than it does introverts. -
5:40 - 5:43When extroverts come into the office
at nine o'clock in the morning -
5:43 - 5:46and say, "I really need a cup of coffee,"
-
5:46 - 5:47they're not kidding --
-
5:47 - 5:49they really do.
-
5:50 - 5:51Introverts do not do as well,
-
5:51 - 5:54particularly if the tasks
they're engaged in -- -
5:55 - 5:56and they've had some coffee --
-
5:56 - 5:59if those tasks are speeded,
-
5:59 - 6:01and if they're quantitative,
-
6:01 - 6:05introverts may give the appearance
of not being particularly quantitative. -
6:06 - 6:07But it's a misconstrual.
-
6:07 - 6:10So here are the consequences
that are really quite intriguing: -
6:10 - 6:12we're not always what seem to be,
-
6:12 - 6:16and that takes me to my next point.
-
6:16 - 6:19I should say, before getting to this,
-
6:19 - 6:21something about sexual intercourse,
-
6:21 - 6:24although I may not have time.
-
6:24 - 6:26And so, if you would like me to --
-
6:27 - 6:28yes, you would?
-
6:28 - 6:29OK.
-
6:29 - 6:30(Laughter)
-
6:30 - 6:31There are studies done
-
6:31 - 6:36on the frequency with which
individuals engage in the conjugal act, -
6:37 - 6:41as broken down by male, female;
introvert, extrovert. -
6:41 - 6:42So I ask you:
-
6:42 - 6:44How many times per minute --
-
6:45 - 6:47oh, I'm sorry, that was a rat study --
-
6:47 - 6:49(Laughter)
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6:50 - 6:52How many times per month
-
6:55 - 6:58do introverted men engage in the act?
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6:58 - 7:003.0.
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7:00 - 7:02Extroverted men?
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7:02 - 7:03More or less?
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7:04 - 7:05Yes, more.
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7:06 - 7:085.5 -- almost twice as much.
-
7:09 - 7:12Introverted women: 3.1.
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7:12 - 7:13Extroverted women?
-
7:13 - 7:17Frankly, speaking as an introverted male,
-
7:17 - 7:19which I will explain later --
-
7:19 - 7:20they are heroic.
-
7:21 - 7:237.5.
-
7:24 - 7:26They not only handle
all the male extroverts, -
7:26 - 7:28they pick up a few introverts as well.
-
7:28 - 7:30(Laughter)
-
7:30 - 7:33(Applause)
-
7:37 - 7:41We communicate differently,
extroverts and introverts. -
7:43 - 7:44Extroverts, when they interact,
-
7:44 - 7:49want to have lots of social encounter
punctuated by closeness. -
7:49 - 7:52They'd like to stand close
for comfortable communication. -
7:53 - 7:55They like to have a lot of eye contact,
-
7:55 - 7:56or mutual gaze.
-
7:57 - 7:58We found in some research
-
7:58 - 8:01that they use more diminutive terms
when they meet somebody. -
8:02 - 8:05So when an extrovert meets a Charles,
-
8:05 - 8:07it rapidly becomes "Charlie,"
and then "Chuck," -
8:08 - 8:09and then "Chuckles Baby."
-
8:09 - 8:11(Laughter)
-
8:11 - 8:12Whereas for introverts,
-
8:12 - 8:17it remains "Charles," until he's given
a pass to be more intimate -
8:17 - 8:20by the person he's talking to.
-
8:20 - 8:23We speak differently.
-
8:25 - 8:30Extroverts prefer black-and-white,
concrete, simple language. -
8:32 - 8:36Introverts prefer --
and I must again tell you -
8:36 - 8:40that I am as extreme an introvert
as you could possibly imagine -- -
8:41 - 8:43we speak differently.
-
8:43 - 8:47We prefer contextually complex,
-
8:47 - 8:49contingent,
-
8:49 - 8:51weasel-word sentences --
-
8:51 - 8:52(Laughter)
-
8:52 - 8:53More or less.
-
8:53 - 8:55(Laughter)
-
8:55 - 8:56As it were.
-
8:56 - 8:57(Laughter)
-
8:57 - 8:59Not to put too fine a point upon it --
-
9:00 - 9:01like that.
-
9:02 - 9:03When we talk,
-
9:03 - 9:05we sometimes talk past each other.
-
9:06 - 9:08I had a consulting contract
I shared with a colleague -
9:08 - 9:11who's as different from me
as two people can possibly be. -
9:12 - 9:14First, his name is Tom.
-
9:14 - 9:16Mine isn't.
-
9:16 - 9:17(Laughter)
-
9:17 - 9:19Secondly, he's six foot five.
-
9:19 - 9:21I have a tendency not to be.
-
9:21 - 9:22(Laughter)
-
9:22 - 9:26And thirdly, he's as extroverted
a person as you could find. -
9:26 - 9:28I am seriously introverted.
-
9:29 - 9:30I overload so much,
-
9:30 - 9:35I can't even have a cup of coffee
after three in the afternoon -
9:35 - 9:38and expect to sleep in the evening.
-
9:38 - 9:42We had seconded to this project
a fellow called Michael. -
9:43 - 9:47And Michael almost brought
the project to a crashing halt. -
9:49 - 9:52So the person who seconded him
asked Tom and me, -
9:53 - 9:55"What do you make of Michael?"
-
9:55 - 9:57Well, I'll tell you
what Tom said in a minute. -
9:57 - 9:59He spoke in classic "extrovert-ese."
-
10:00 - 10:04And here is how extroverted ears
heard what I said, -
10:04 - 10:06which is actually pretty accurate.
-
10:06 - 10:10I said, "Well Michael does have
a tendency at times -
10:10 - 10:14of behaving in a way
that some of us might see -
10:14 - 10:19as perhaps more assertive
than is normally called for." -
10:19 - 10:21(Laughter)
-
10:22 - 10:23Tom rolled his eyes and he said,
-
10:23 - 10:26"Brian, that's what I said:
-
10:27 - 10:28he's an asshole!"
-
10:28 - 10:30(Laughter)
-
10:30 - 10:32(Applause)
-
10:34 - 10:35Now, as an introvert,
-
10:35 - 10:40I might gently allude to certain
"assholic" qualities -
10:40 - 10:41in this man's behavior,
-
10:41 - 10:44but I'm not going to lunge for the a-word.
-
10:44 - 10:46(Laughter)
-
10:47 - 10:48But the extrovert says,
-
10:49 - 10:51"If he walks like one, if he talks
like one, I call him one." -
10:51 - 10:53And we go past each other.
-
10:53 - 10:57Now is this something
that we should be heedful of? -
10:57 - 10:59Of course.
-
10:59 - 11:00It's important that we know this.
-
11:00 - 11:02Is that all we are?
-
11:03 - 11:05Are we just a bunch of traits?
-
11:06 - 11:07No, we're not.
-
11:08 - 11:10Remember, you're like some other people
-
11:11 - 11:13and like no other person.
-
11:13 - 11:16How about that idiosyncratic you?
-
11:16 - 11:20As Elizabeth or as George,
-
11:20 - 11:23you may share your extroversion
or your neuroticism. -
11:24 - 11:28But are there some distinctively
Elizabethan features of your behavior, -
11:28 - 11:30or Georgian of yours,
-
11:32 - 11:36that make us understand you
better than just a bunch of traits? -
11:36 - 11:39That make us love you?
-
11:39 - 11:42Not just because you're
a certain type of person. -
11:43 - 11:46I'm uncomfortable putting
people in pigeonholes. -
11:47 - 11:50I don't even think pigeons
belong in pigeonholes. -
11:51 - 11:53So what is it that makes us different?
-
11:54 - 11:59It's the doings that we have
in our life -- the personal projects. -
11:59 - 12:01You have a personal project right now,
-
12:01 - 12:04but nobody may know it here.
-
12:06 - 12:07It relates to your kid --
-
12:07 - 12:10you've been back three times
to the hospital, -
12:10 - 12:11and they still don't know what's wrong.
-
12:13 - 12:15Or it could be your mom.
-
12:16 - 12:18And you'd been acting out of character.
-
12:18 - 12:20These are free traits.
-
12:22 - 12:25You're very agreeable,
but you act disagreeably -
12:25 - 12:28in order to break down those barriers
of administrative torpor -
12:29 - 12:30in the hospital,
-
12:30 - 12:32to get something
for your mom or your child. -
12:34 - 12:35What are these free traits?
-
12:35 - 12:38They're where were enact a script
-
12:38 - 12:41in order to advance
a core project in our lives. -
12:42 - 12:44And they are what matters.
-
12:44 - 12:46Don't ask people what type you are;
-
12:47 - 12:49ask them, "What are your core
projects in your life?" -
12:50 - 12:51And we enact those free traits.
-
12:51 - 12:53I'm an introvert,
-
12:53 - 12:57but I have a core project,
which is to profess. -
12:58 - 12:59I'm a professor.
-
13:00 - 13:02And I adore my students,
-
13:03 - 13:05and I adore my field.
-
13:05 - 13:10And I can't wait to tell them
about what's new, what's exciting, -
13:11 - 13:14what I can't wait to tell them about.
-
13:14 - 13:15And so I act in an extroverted way,
-
13:15 - 13:17because at eight in the morning,
-
13:17 - 13:19the students need a little bit of humor,
-
13:19 - 13:22a little bit of engagement
to keep them going -
13:22 - 13:24in arduous days of study.
-
13:24 - 13:26But we need to be very careful
-
13:26 - 13:29when we act protractedly out of character.
-
13:31 - 13:35Sometimes we may find
that we don't take care of ourselves. -
13:37 - 13:42I find, for example, after a period
of pseudo-extroverted behavior, -
13:42 - 13:44I need to repair somewhere on my own.
-
13:46 - 13:49As Susan Cain said in her "Quiet" book,
-
13:49 - 13:52in a chapter that featured
the strange Canadian professor -
13:52 - 13:54who was teaching at the time at Harvard,
-
13:55 - 13:57I sometimes go to the men's room
-
13:57 - 14:01to escape the slings and arrows
of outrageous extroverts. -
14:01 - 14:02(Laughter)
-
14:02 - 14:09I remember one particular day
when I was retired to a cubicle, -
14:09 - 14:10trying to avoid overstimulation.
-
14:11 - 14:16And a real extrovert came
in beside me -- not right in my cubicle, -
14:16 - 14:18but in the next cubicle over --
-
14:18 - 14:21and I could hear various
evacuatory noises, -
14:21 - 14:23which we hate -- even our own,
-
14:23 - 14:26that's why we flush
during as well as after. -
14:26 - 14:27(Laughter)
-
14:28 - 14:33And then I heard
this gravelly voice saying, -
14:33 - 14:35"Hey, is that Dr. Little?"
-
14:35 - 14:37(Laughter)
-
14:39 - 14:45If anything is guaranteed
to constipate an introvert for six months, -
14:45 - 14:47it's talking on the john.
-
14:47 - 14:48(Laughter)
-
14:48 - 14:50That's where I'm going now.
-
14:51 - 14:52Don't follow me.
-
14:53 - 14:54Thank you.
-
14:54 - 15:03(Applause)
- Title:
- Who are you, really? The puzzle of personality
- Speaker:
- Brian Little
- Description:
-
What makes you, you? Psychologists like to talk about our traits, or defined characteristics that make us who we are. But Brian Little is more interested in moments when we transcend those traits — sometimes because our culture demands it of us, and sometimes because we demand it of ourselves. Join Little as he dissects the surprising differences between introverts and extroverts and explains why your personality may be more malleable than you think.
- Video Language:
- English
- Team:
closed TED
- Project:
- TEDTalks
- Duration:
- 15:15
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Brian Greene edited English subtitles for Who are you, really? The puzzle of personality | |
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Brian Greene edited English subtitles for Who are you, really? The puzzle of personality | |
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Camille Martínez accepted English subtitles for Who are you, really? The puzzle of personality | |
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Camille Martínez edited English subtitles for Who are you, really? The puzzle of personality | |
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Camille Martínez edited English subtitles for Who are you, really? The puzzle of personality |