How to lead an intentional life | Ryder Carroll | TEDxYale

This talk was given at a TEDx event using the TED conference format but independently organized by a local community. Learn more at http://ted.com/tedx

Being busy doesn't always mean being productive. Ryder Carroll shares the story of how a system he developed to manage his childhood attention deficit disorder now helps people worldwide achieve their goals with greater efficiency and satisfaction.

Ryder Carroll is a digital product designer and inventor of the Bullet Journal. He was born and raised in Vienna, Austria, but now lives in Brooklyn, NY. He enjoys serving as the Lead Designer at Idean in New York City. He's been featured by the LA Times, The Wall Street Journal, Fast Company, Bloomberg, Vogue, and Mashable.

I believe that we are responsible

for creating the moments of joy
in our own lives.

We can't take credit
for a beautiful sunrise,

but we can take credit
for being there to see it.

We can take credit

for the decisions that we made
that allowed us to experience that moment.

You decided to leave house early.
You decided to go for a hike.

But making good decisions is really hard.

It's something I've struggled
with my entire life.

When I was young, I was diagnosed
with Attention Deficit Disorder.

At the time, there was not
a lot known about the condition,

and there were no resources,
not to mention that there was no Internet.

So the few tools that I could find
were either too rigid or too complicated.

They didn't work the way
that my mind worked.

A big misconception about ADD
is that we can't focus.

In my experience, I could focus.

I was just focusing on
too many things at the same time.

So, over the next 25 years,

I silently made it my mission
to design my own resources.

Over time, I actually outgrew my ADD,

but I found the methodologies
I'd developed

remained relevant, incredibly helpful

so I shared them
with a couple of my friends.

I was really surprised to find out
that they too found it helpful.

Who knew?

I designed it for myself,

I'd never assumed
that it would work for other people.

But with that in mind,
about three years ago,

I built a website and shot some videos

to teach the system to others,

in hopes that it might help them
the way that it helped me.

I called the system "The Bullet Journal."

If you search for the Bullet Journal
on YouTube or Instagram today,

you will find hundreds
of thousands of examples

of how people have adopted
the Bullet Journal

to help them deal with challenges
in their own lives.

Those tutorial videos
have been seen over 5 million times.

It's incredible.

I just wished that I'd had this knowledge
when I was that young struggling kid.

That's why I'm very excited
to be here today

to share some
of what I've learned with you.

We're going to talk about
how to declutter your mind,

how to cultivate your curiosity,

and how to remain focused over time.

These practices
will help you close the gap

from leading a distracted life
to leading one of intention.

And all begins with reflection.

Studies suggest we have
over 500,000 thoughts

every single day.

Remember, as a kid, my biggest problem was

I was focusing on way too many things
at the same time.

Doesn't that some familiar though?

As an adult, that's just known
as being busy.

But being busy doesn't mean
that you're being productive, right?

A lot of time, being busy just means

you're in a state of being
functionally-overwhelmed.

And a lot of this is due to
the overwhelming amount of choices

that we have to make in our modern life.

Freedom of choice
is absolutely your privilege,

but it's a privilege that comes at a cost

because for every one
of these choices that we make,

we have to make a decision.

And every decision requires us to focus.

And focus costs us
our two most valuable resources:

our energy and our time.

We don't like to think
about how to invest our energy and time

because it's really stressful.

"What do I want to do with my life?"

It's a very overwhelming question.

It's like going shopping
when you're super hungry

but you have no idea what you want to eat.

Have you ever done that?

You walk in, and there is
a million different options,

you're immediately overwhelmed,

so you just start picking
all sorts of random junk.

Most of it will end up
in your pantry of shame.

The rest will go bad in the fridge.
It's always a waste.

But you've vowed to do better next time

as you pick up the phone
to order pizza again.

Decision fatigue is a real condition,
and it can lead to decision avoidance.

Rather than dealing with these thoughts,

we just start stuffing them
into the back of our mental pantry

until we have no more room left
to think clearly.

That can cause an incredible amount
of anxiety and stress

because we feel like we're losing control.

We're overwhelmed.
We need room to think and to focus.

So how do we create room?

Like when you cleaning a pantry,
we have to start by taking everything out.

We have to externalize our thoughts
to declutter our mind.

A good way that I found to do this
is to create a mental inventory.

Simply take a sheet of paper and a pen,

write down the things that you need to do,

the things that you should be doing,
and the things that you want to do.

Holding thoughts in your mind
is like trying to grasp water --

it's nearly impossible.

But by writing down our thoughts,
we can capture them clearly

so we can work with them later.

So now we have
this mental inventory; now what?

This mental inventory

will actually give you
a pretty clear picture

as to how you're investing
both your time and your energy.

So the next step is
to ask yourself, "Why?"

Why am I doing these things?
It's a simple question.

But you don't have to dive down
some existential rabbit hole;

simply ask yourself, "Does it matter
or is this actually holding me hostage?"

We burden ourselves with
unnecessary responsibilities all the time.

We're so distracted by all the things

that we should be doing
and we could be doing

but we completely forget
to ask ourselves,

"Why are we doing these things?
Do I even want to be doing those things?"

But now we have
a mental inventory to remind us.

So, for every item on this inventory,
ask yourself two questions.

One - "Is it vital?"

Is this item vital, this task vital;
think rent, taxes - that kind of thing.

Two - "Does it matter?"

Does it actually matter to you
or to someone that you love?

If the answer is no
to both of those things,

you've just identified a distraction,
and you can cross it off your list.

For every item you cross off your list,
you're becoming less and less distracted.

OK, so now, your mental inventory
is divided by the things you have to do,

and the rest is probably related to things
that you aspire to -- your goals.

The key to setting goals
is to set yourself up for success.

And the best way I found to do that

is to take your goals and to break them
down into small actionable projects.

If you don't know how to cook,
but you want to learn,

don't start by tackling
an incredibly complicated meal

for six people.

Even if you don't make a total mess,

the experience
will have been so unpleasant

that you run the risk
of ruining your curiosity

about cooking all together.

Natural curiosity is incredibly important
because it's genuine, it can't be faked.

These small projects allow us

to cultivate our curiosities
and help them grow;

maybe even help some of them blossom
into fully-fledged passions.

At the very least,

we learn more about ourselves,
about the things that we want.

So what do these small projects look like?

For one, they have to have
no barriers to entry.

What does that mean?

You don't have to wait
on anybody or anything;

you can get started right away.

Two - they have to have a very clearly
defined list of actions and tasks.

And three - it should take
less than a month to complete.

If you estimate your project will take
more than a month, that's fine.

Just break it into two smaller projects.

These projects don't even have to be
part of some big epic goal.

They can be self-contained micro goals.

The goal really here is to be able
to indulge your curiosity,

try it on for size and see if it fits
so you don't waste time.

Unfortunately, time
is not a renewable resource.

You can't make time.
You can only take time.

It's our responsibility to take the time

to identify the things that interest us,
to figure out ways to pursue them

because project after project,
goal after goal,

we will learn what we want to eat,

and we'll have acquired all the skills
that we need to prepare a beautiful meal.

We'll go from this state
to something more along these lines.

But it takes time.
And it takes dedication.

Please, raise your hands

if you've ever accomplished the goal
that you set for yourself.

Congratulations.

(Laughter)

Now please, raise your hands again,

if by accomplishing a goal
it was like a dream come true,

it was exactly like you thought
it was going to be.

All right. Not as many hands. Why is that?

It's because time has passed.

You've learned new things,
your circumstances have changed;

you're not the same person anymore.

This mental inventory is like a map

and as we navigate our lives,

we have to dedicate ourselves

to a habit of keeping that map updated
with all the new things that we discover.

If we don't, our map becomes inaccurate,
and we start to go off course, we drift.

And all of sudden, the distractions
start leaking back into our lives.

Even if it's only five minutes a day,
just five minutes a day,

we have to dedicate
ourselves to a practice

that allows us to keep
our mental inventory updated.

Over time this skill, this practice

will also provide you
with a lot of personal data,

and that data can provide
profound insights into your life:

what have you tried,
what have you not tried,

what should you do more of,
what's working, what's not.

I've been doing this for years,

and it's shown me just how much power
I actually do have in shaping my life.

It's allowed that young
struggling kid with ADD

to stand on this stage today
in front of you.

It's also allowed this adult
to get through the speech,

but we're almost there.

OK, so, to recap:

reflect - declutter your mind
by creating a mental inventory,

get rid of what doesn't matter;

ideate - figure out ways
to pursue the things that interest you

by creating small actual projects;

dedicate - get into a daily practice
of keeping your mental inventory updated.

Reflect, ideate, dedicate.

Rid yourself of the things
that don't matter,

so you have the time and the energy
to focus on the things that do.

I'll help you go
from leading that busy life

to leading an intentional life,
to close that gap.

An intentional life is the one
that you want to live

not the one that you endure.

The intentional life has the power

to grant you more of those
beautiful moments in the sun.

Thank you.

(Applause)