WEBVTT 00:00:07.834 --> 00:00:11.154 I believe that we are responsible 00:00:11.155 --> 00:00:14.584 for creating the moments of joy in our own lives. 00:00:15.459 --> 00:00:18.376 We can't take credit for a beautiful sunrise, 00:00:18.377 --> 00:00:21.336 but we can take credit for being there to see it. 00:00:22.042 --> 00:00:23.124 We can take credit 00:00:23.125 --> 00:00:27.500 for the decisions that we made that allowed us to experience that moment. 00:00:28.334 --> 00:00:31.751 You decided to leave house early. You decided to go for a hike. 00:00:32.709 --> 00:00:35.520 But making good decisions is really hard. 00:00:36.042 --> 00:00:39.001 It's something I've struggled with my entire life. 00:00:39.667 --> 00:00:42.917 When I was young, I was diagnosed with Attention Deficit Disorder. 00:00:43.751 --> 00:00:46.960 At the time, there was not a lot known about the condition, 00:00:46.961 --> 00:00:50.501 and there were no resources, not to mention that there was no Internet. 00:00:50.751 --> 00:00:56.792 So the few tools that I could find were either too rigid or too complicated. 00:00:56.793 --> 00:00:59.400 They didn't work the way that my mind worked. 00:01:00.709 --> 00:01:03.918 A big misconception about ADD is that we can't focus. 00:01:04.584 --> 00:01:06.460 In my experience, I could focus. 00:01:06.959 --> 00:01:10.501 I was just focusing on too many things at the same time. 00:01:12.708 --> 00:01:14.333 So, over the next 25 years, 00:01:14.334 --> 00:01:19.459 I silently made it my mission to design my own resources. 00:01:22.709 --> 00:01:25.876 Over time, I actually outgrew my ADD, 00:01:26.667 --> 00:01:29.645 but I found the methodologies I'd developed 00:01:29.646 --> 00:01:32.646 remained relevant, incredibly helpful 00:01:32.656 --> 00:01:35.168 so I shared them with a couple of my friends. 00:01:35.169 --> 00:01:39.459 I was really surprised to find out that they too found it helpful. 00:01:40.091 --> 00:01:41.192 Who knew? 00:01:41.193 --> 00:01:42.390 I designed it for myself, 00:01:42.510 --> 00:01:45.470 I'd never assumed that it would work for other people. 00:01:45.471 --> 00:01:48.875 But with that in mind, about three years ago, 00:01:48.876 --> 00:01:51.376 I built a website and shot some videos 00:01:51.377 --> 00:01:53.758 to teach the system to others, 00:01:53.759 --> 00:01:57.171 in hopes that it might help them the way that it helped me. 00:01:57.542 --> 00:01:59.959 I called the system "The Bullet Journal." 00:02:02.000 --> 00:02:06.791 If you search for the Bullet Journal on YouTube or Instagram today, 00:02:06.792 --> 00:02:10.541 you will find hundreds of thousands of examples 00:02:10.542 --> 00:02:12.708 of how people have adopted the Bullet Journal 00:02:12.709 --> 00:02:15.501 to help them deal with challenges in their own lives. 00:02:16.459 --> 00:02:20.126 Those tutorial videos have been seen over 5 million times. 00:02:20.393 --> 00:02:21.834 It's incredible. 00:02:24.167 --> 00:02:28.583 I just wished that I'd had this knowledge when I was that young struggling kid. 00:02:28.584 --> 00:02:30.708 That's why I'm very excited to be here today 00:02:30.709 --> 00:02:33.208 to share some of what I've learned with you. 00:02:35.417 --> 00:02:38.417 We're going to talk about how to declutter your mind, 00:02:39.083 --> 00:02:41.715 how to cultivate your curiosity, 00:02:44.678 --> 00:02:47.641 and how to remain focused over time. 00:02:48.281 --> 00:02:51.127 These practices will help you close the gap 00:02:51.128 --> 00:02:55.043 from leading a distracted life to leading one of intention. 00:02:56.179 --> 00:02:59.259 And all begins with reflection. 00:03:00.542 --> 00:03:06.125 Studies suggest we have over 500,000 thoughts 00:03:06.126 --> 00:03:08.106 every single day. 00:03:10.602 --> 00:03:13.231 Remember, as a kid, my biggest problem was 00:03:13.232 --> 00:03:16.251 I was focusing on way too many things at the same time. 00:03:16.851 --> 00:03:18.611 Doesn't that some familiar though? 00:03:19.709 --> 00:03:22.999 As an adult, that's just known as being busy. 00:03:23.000 --> 00:03:27.083 But being busy doesn't mean that you're being productive, right? 00:03:27.084 --> 00:03:29.333 A lot of time, being busy just means 00:03:29.334 --> 00:03:32.417 you're in a state of being functionally-overwhelmed. 00:03:34.292 --> 00:03:38.080 And a lot of this is due to the overwhelming amount of choices 00:03:38.081 --> 00:03:40.595 that we have to make in our modern life. 00:03:42.876 --> 00:03:46.752 Freedom of choice is absolutely your privilege, 00:03:47.125 --> 00:03:49.125 but it's a privilege that comes at a cost 00:03:49.918 --> 00:03:52.460 because for every one of these choices that we make, 00:03:52.967 --> 00:03:54.637 we have to make a decision. 00:03:55.197 --> 00:03:57.583 And every decision requires us to focus. 00:03:58.042 --> 00:04:01.668 And focus costs us our two most valuable resources: 00:04:01.864 --> 00:04:04.734 our energy and our time. 00:04:05.584 --> 00:04:08.583 We don't like to think about how to invest our energy and time 00:04:08.584 --> 00:04:10.185 because it's really stressful. 00:04:10.918 --> 00:04:12.794 "What do I want to do with my life?" 00:04:12.795 --> 00:04:14.751 It's a very overwhelming question. 00:04:16.125 --> 00:04:19.149 It's like going shopping when you're super hungry 00:04:19.151 --> 00:04:21.269 but you have no idea what you want to eat. 00:04:21.271 --> 00:04:22.789 Have you ever done that? 00:04:22.790 --> 00:04:25.502 You walk in, and there is a million different options, 00:04:25.517 --> 00:04:27.259 you're immediately overwhelmed, 00:04:27.260 --> 00:04:29.876 so you just start picking all sorts of random junk. 00:04:30.417 --> 00:04:32.709 Most of it will end up in your pantry of shame. 00:04:33.626 --> 00:04:36.544 The rest will go bad in the fridge. It's always a waste. 00:04:36.751 --> 00:04:38.626 But you've vowed to do better next time 00:04:38.627 --> 00:04:41.128 as you pick up the phone to order pizza again. 00:04:44.626 --> 00:04:49.502 Decision fatigue is a real condition, and it can lead to decision avoidance. 00:04:49.900 --> 00:04:51.917 Rather than dealing with these thoughts, 00:04:51.918 --> 00:04:55.168 we just start stuffing them into the back of our mental pantry 00:04:55.169 --> 00:04:58.334 until we have no more room left to think clearly. 00:04:58.918 --> 00:05:03.124 That can cause an incredible amount of anxiety and stress 00:05:03.125 --> 00:05:05.626 because we feel like we're losing control. 00:05:06.250 --> 00:05:10.959 We're overwhelmed. We need room to think and to focus. 00:05:11.649 --> 00:05:13.176 So how do we create room? 00:05:15.375 --> 00:05:19.334 Like when you cleaning a pantry, we have to start by taking everything out. 00:05:20.626 --> 00:05:24.085 We have to externalize our thoughts to declutter our mind. 00:05:25.167 --> 00:05:29.709 A good way that I found to do this is to create a mental inventory. 00:05:31.083 --> 00:05:33.083 Simply take a sheet of paper and a pen, 00:05:34.375 --> 00:05:36.500 write down the things that you need to do, 00:05:36.918 --> 00:05:41.210 the things that you should be doing, and the things that you want to do. 00:05:43.584 --> 00:05:46.834 Holding thoughts in your mind is like trying to grasp water -- 00:05:47.177 --> 00:05:48.798 it's nearly impossible. 00:05:49.334 --> 00:05:52.960 But by writing down our thoughts, we can capture them clearly 00:05:52.983 --> 00:05:54.941 so we can work with them later. 00:05:55.542 --> 00:05:58.542 So now we have this mental inventory; now what? 00:05:59.613 --> 00:06:00.791 This mental inventory 00:06:00.792 --> 00:06:02.916 will actually give you a pretty clear picture 00:06:02.917 --> 00:06:06.292 as to how you're investing both your time and your energy. 00:06:06.923 --> 00:06:10.696 So the next step is to ask yourself, "Why?" 00:06:11.918 --> 00:06:15.292 Why am I doing these things? It's a simple question. 00:06:15.293 --> 00:06:18.278 But you don't have to dive down some existential rabbit hole; 00:06:18.279 --> 00:06:23.401 simply ask yourself, "Does it matter or is this actually holding me hostage?" 00:06:25.959 --> 00:06:30.835 We burden ourselves with unnecessary responsibilities all the time. 00:06:31.353 --> 00:06:33.124 We're so distracted by all the things 00:06:33.125 --> 00:06:35.334 that we should be doing and we could be doing 00:06:35.335 --> 00:06:37.412 but we completely forget to ask ourselves, 00:06:37.413 --> 00:06:41.292 "Why are we doing these things? Do I even want to be doing those things?" 00:06:41.959 --> 00:06:44.376 But now we have a mental inventory to remind us. 00:06:45.667 --> 00:06:50.585 So, for every item on this inventory, ask yourself two questions. 00:06:51.542 --> 00:06:54.150 One - "Is it vital?" 00:06:54.151 --> 00:06:58.663 Is this item vital, this task vital; think rent, taxes - that kind of thing. 00:06:59.910 --> 00:07:02.491 Two - "Does it matter?" 00:07:03.292 --> 00:07:07.101 Does it actually matter to you or to someone that you love? 00:07:07.709 --> 00:07:10.376 If the answer is no to both of those things, 00:07:10.377 --> 00:07:14.959 you've just identified a distraction, and you can cross it off your list. 00:07:15.626 --> 00:07:20.377 For every item you cross off your list, you're becoming less and less distracted. 00:07:22.626 --> 00:07:27.167 OK, so now, your mental inventory is divided by the things you have to do, 00:07:27.168 --> 00:07:31.293 and the rest is probably related to things that you aspire to -- your goals. 00:07:32.459 --> 00:07:36.085 The key to setting goals is to set yourself up for success. 00:07:36.417 --> 00:07:38.250 And the best way I found to do that 00:07:38.251 --> 00:07:43.460 is to take your goals and to break them down into small actionable projects. 00:07:43.928 --> 00:07:46.417 If you don't know how to cook, but you want to learn, 00:07:46.418 --> 00:07:48.959 don't start by tackling an incredibly complicated meal 00:07:48.960 --> 00:07:50.276 for six people. 00:07:50.277 --> 00:07:52.314 Even if you don't make a total mess, 00:07:52.315 --> 00:07:54.750 the experience will have been so unpleasant 00:07:54.751 --> 00:07:57.626 that you run the risk of ruining your curiosity 00:07:57.627 --> 00:07:59.432 about cooking all together. 00:08:01.417 --> 00:08:07.626 Natural curiosity is incredibly important because it's genuine, it can't be faked. 00:08:08.667 --> 00:08:10.500 These small projects allow us 00:08:10.501 --> 00:08:13.626 to cultivate our curiosities and help them grow; 00:08:13.627 --> 00:08:17.668 maybe even help some of them blossom into fully-fledged passions. 00:08:18.167 --> 00:08:20.191 At the very least, 00:08:20.192 --> 00:08:23.667 we learn more about ourselves, about the things that we want. 00:08:24.542 --> 00:08:26.751 So what do these small projects look like? 00:08:27.792 --> 00:08:30.084 For one, they have to have no barriers to entry. 00:08:30.199 --> 00:08:31.374 What does that mean? 00:08:31.375 --> 00:08:33.541 You don't have to wait on anybody or anything; 00:08:33.542 --> 00:08:35.044 you can get started right away. 00:08:35.751 --> 00:08:41.893 Two - they have to have a very clearly defined list of actions and tasks. 00:08:42.832 --> 00:08:46.501 And three - it should take less than a month to complete. 00:08:47.167 --> 00:08:50.750 If you estimate your project will take more than a month, that's fine. 00:08:50.751 --> 00:08:52.709 Just break it into two smaller projects. 00:08:52.710 --> 00:08:56.691 These projects don't even have to be part of some big epic goal. 00:08:56.692 --> 00:08:59.706 They can be self-contained micro goals. 00:09:00.584 --> 00:09:05.333 The goal really here is to be able to indulge your curiosity, 00:09:05.334 --> 00:09:09.584 try it on for size and see if it fits so you don't waste time. 00:09:11.501 --> 00:09:14.460 Unfortunately, time is not a renewable resource. 00:09:15.250 --> 00:09:19.584 You can't make time. You can only take time. 00:09:20.542 --> 00:09:23.193 It's our responsibility to take the time 00:09:23.194 --> 00:09:27.334 to identify the things that interest us, to figure out ways to pursue them 00:09:27.542 --> 00:09:30.791 because project after project, goal after goal, 00:09:30.792 --> 00:09:32.958 we will learn what we want to eat, 00:09:32.959 --> 00:09:37.293 and we'll have acquired all the skills that we need to prepare a beautiful meal. 00:09:38.375 --> 00:09:42.792 We'll go from this state to something more along these lines. 00:09:43.209 --> 00:09:48.251 But it takes time. And it takes dedication. 00:09:50.792 --> 00:09:52.166 Please, raise your hands 00:09:52.167 --> 00:09:55.209 if you've ever accomplished the goal that you set for yourself. 00:09:57.004 --> 00:09:58.488 Congratulations. 00:09:58.489 --> 00:09:59.697 (Laughter) 00:10:00.250 --> 00:10:02.666 Now please, raise your hands again, 00:10:02.667 --> 00:10:06.958 if by accomplishing a goal it was like a dream come true, 00:10:06.959 --> 00:10:10.001 it was exactly like you thought it was going to be. 00:10:11.125 --> 00:10:15.165 All right. Not as many hands. Why is that? 00:10:16.561 --> 00:10:18.240 It's because time has passed. 00:10:18.626 --> 00:10:22.402 You've learned new things, your circumstances have changed; 00:10:22.403 --> 00:10:24.532 you're not the same person anymore. 00:10:26.956 --> 00:10:29.253 This mental inventory is like a map 00:10:30.375 --> 00:10:32.543 and as we navigate our lives, 00:10:32.544 --> 00:10:34.157 we have to dedicate ourselves 00:10:34.158 --> 00:10:38.627 to a habit of keeping that map updated with all the new things that we discover. 00:10:39.250 --> 00:10:45.126 If we don't, our map becomes inaccurate, and we start to go off course, we drift. 00:10:45.459 --> 00:10:49.126 And all of sudden, the distractions start leaking back into our lives. 00:10:50.334 --> 00:10:54.835 Even if it's only five minutes a day, just five minutes a day, 00:10:54.836 --> 00:10:58.166 we have to dedicate ourselves to a practice 00:10:58.167 --> 00:11:01.542 that allows us to keep our mental inventory updated. 00:11:02.609 --> 00:11:05.583 Over time this skill, this practice 00:11:05.584 --> 00:11:09.542 will also provide you with a lot of personal data, 00:11:09.543 --> 00:11:13.333 and that data can provide profound insights into your life: 00:11:13.334 --> 00:11:15.734 what have you tried, what have you not tried, 00:11:15.735 --> 00:11:18.585 what should you do more of, what's working, what's not. 00:11:19.209 --> 00:11:20.875 I've been doing this for years, 00:11:20.876 --> 00:11:25.043 and it's shown me just how much power I actually do have in shaping my life. 00:11:26.209 --> 00:11:29.168 It's allowed that young struggling kid with ADD 00:11:29.169 --> 00:11:32.251 to stand on this stage today in front of you. 00:11:32.751 --> 00:11:35.418 It's also allowed this adult to get through the speech, 00:11:35.419 --> 00:11:37.069 but we're almost there. 00:11:37.070 --> 00:11:39.372 OK, so, to recap: 00:11:41.652 --> 00:11:46.347 reflect - declutter your mind by creating a mental inventory, 00:11:46.348 --> 00:11:48.722 get rid of what doesn't matter; 00:11:50.918 --> 00:11:55.669 ideate - figure out ways to pursue the things that interest you 00:11:55.690 --> 00:11:58.278 by creating small actual projects; 00:11:59.918 --> 00:12:05.419 dedicate - get into a daily practice of keeping your mental inventory updated. 00:12:06.584 --> 00:12:09.809 Reflect, ideate, dedicate. 00:12:10.626 --> 00:12:13.085 Rid yourself of the things that don't matter, 00:12:13.086 --> 00:12:17.208 so you have the time and the energy to focus on the things that do. 00:12:18.125 --> 00:12:20.958 I'll help you go from leading that busy life 00:12:20.959 --> 00:12:25.616 to leading an intentional life, to close that gap. 00:12:26.417 --> 00:12:29.541 An intentional life is the one that you want to live 00:12:29.542 --> 00:12:32.635 not the one that you endure. 00:12:33.893 --> 00:12:36.374 The intentional life has the power 00:12:36.375 --> 00:12:41.223 to grant you more of those beautiful moments in the sun. 00:12:41.224 --> 00:12:42.510 Thank you. 00:12:42.511 --> 00:12:43.830 (Applause)