-
-These are our favorite
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"Jokes of the Week."
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[ Cheering, whistling,
and applause ]
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According to sources,
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former National Security Advisor
John Bolton
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told conservative donors
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he thinks President Trump
is mentally unstable,
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but I'm sure Trump
will clear up that misconception
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with 150 tweets at 3:00 am
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[ Laughter ]
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Senator Mitt Romney
was seen today
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drinking chocolate milk
during the impeachment trial
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and then, right after,
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he failed a breathalyzer test.
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[ Laughter ]
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State lawmakers in Kentuck
have proposed a bill
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that would require schools
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to start teaching sex ed
in kindergarten.
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Said a Kentucky first grader
"Oh, man,
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that really would've
been helpful
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before my wedding night!"
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[ Laughter and ohhs ]
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Republican Senator Mike Brau
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this weekend said that he hope
impeachment will serve
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as a learning experience
for President Trump, saying,
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"I think he'll
put 2 and 2 together."
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Because if there's
one thing we know
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about a man who has
bankrupted three casinos,
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it's that he's good at math.
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[ Laughter and applause ]
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A New York woman has admitte
that she is responsible
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for sending her boyfriend
to the emergency room
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24 times last year
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by secretly putting pesticides
in his food.
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When he asked the doctor wha
to take for that, she said
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"The hint."
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[ Laughter ]
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♪♪♪♪
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[ Cheering and applause ]
