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Some People Are Boycotting Bud Light | The Basement Yard #394

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    Welcome back to the - I'm not even gonna
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    (Laughing) Come on! Sell it a little
    bit
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    -Welcome back to the Basement Yard-
    -You know I've gotta get into energy
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    -mode Well, no, no, you don't.
    -I do! I gotta fucking
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    I saw you out of the corner of my eye
    doing this
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    Do it again.
    One more time?
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    Do it again. I'll just start doing
    the intro,
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    and you do what you were doing
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    Okay take two, trash-
    cut that all out.
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    nonono keep that in
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    -Nono cut it all out
    -No keep it in!
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    Joe
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    -Start saying all those racial slurs
    -KEEP IT IN!
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    ok alright alright
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    I said welcome back to the-
    and you started doing that
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    (Laughing) I started crumping!
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    (Laughing) Stupid fuck
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    That's my version of crumping
    By the way, this?
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    -I don't think that's what they do
    - I don't - THEY?
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    I meant like the-
    (SHOUTING)
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    -(Shouting) The crumping community!
    -(Laughing) The crumping?
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    (laughing) I just meant like-
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    -The crumping community at large
    -Yeah yeah! like
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    -at large
    -Are they still out there?
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    Of course, underground though
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    I feel like crumping has gone way
    underground
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    Did we talk about that
    recently where it was like
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    those movies back in the day
    were like
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    gangsters and they
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    would meet up in a fucking
    basement and dance battle?
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    What movie was it I recently
    watched? It wasn't stomp the yard it was
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    it was one of those-
    the one with Chris Brown in it
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    Stomp the (RE?) Yard
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    Stomp the Yard, ok
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    and it was like these hardcore
    fucking GANG-BANGERS
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    and they're like I'm gonna
    get you on the fucking dance floor
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    And they'll be like
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    And like do that in front of the
    person's face
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    and they're fucking
    trying to fight em in
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    -the middle of a dance
    -Yeah, exactly
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    -Very insane
    -Yeah, I don't know
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    No-one was like
    hardcore crumping
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    -Where we were from
    -Not at all
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    Not even softcore
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    Softcore crumping?
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    Watch Beeps
    Ope, excuse me
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    Little bitch!
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    -What the hell was that?
    -My Apple watch is not
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    quiet, hooooo boy!
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    That sounded like-you're
    fucking..
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    Ope, the cake is ready!
    (Laughter)
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    What was I gonna say
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    Did you know any, like, dancers
    growing- I knew one
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    and i went to a uh
    I dated a girl that was like a dancer
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    Who?
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    (Mutters) I'm not gonna
    First and last year?
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    Just one of them?
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    Forever
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    -Ok (Laughter)
    -Ok alright that
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    -that narrows it down.
    -She was dancer?
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    that narrows it down
    Yeah! She went to dance
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    Oh I didn't, I don't kow
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    And it was tough because I
    expected like
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    -She was doing a ballet type thing
    -The classicals
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    Then there were other people
    that were doing "hip-hop"
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    -Right
    -Oh my god
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    A little, a little weird for me
    to s-
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    Like it's weird to watch people
    hip hop dance!
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    -Ok.
    -In like a serious setting
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    Oh like, wait it was in the same show?
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    YES
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    People did like showcases
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    It was like ballet and then
    let's do hip-hop
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    Yeah it was like one like they would
    do like fucking
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    -You know a song like a nice sweet
    -Swan song
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    -Yeah! Something cool
    -The Black Swan?
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    -Mmm Well, careful.
    -What's that called?
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    Is that it?
    It is black swan
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    Swan lake is the name of the
    show, Black Swan is the movie
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    Oh ok
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    And then the next
    they'll be like
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    "Alright that was so beautiful!"
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    And then like next they'll be like
    you know, here come white greek
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    girls from a story of Queens
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    (Laughter)
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    And it'll be like fucking-
    Hip-hop!
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    Yeah! Or it'll be like they're
    dancing to Furgy
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    Like Fabulish- or
    Furgalishess
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    Fabulicious
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    Fabulous was another
    song of hers, wasn't it?
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    Glamorous
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    (Singing) Glamorous
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    -Anyway I was thinking
    -(Singing) Fabulous
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    You know why I remember
    that song really well?
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    Welcome back to the
    Vash moon
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    Glamorous?
    Yeah, there was
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    A you.... you and like
    THE BOYS
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    I'm not gonna like this am I?
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    No you were it- it's just a story
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    I don't know if you remember it
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    You and the BOYS
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    Who are the BOYS?
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    -Danny, Dom-
    -Oh the BOYS
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    -Da BOYS!
    -Got it
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    Came to pick me up from school
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    When I was at back loriet once
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    It was when that weirdo rearranged
    the letters and was like
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    (Mocking) "The school of Cool Cats!"
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    -Remember that dumb idiot?
    -(Laughter) O-K
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    (Stammers)
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    -We came to pick you up
    -You came to pick me up
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    Cause that was a thing
    it's like
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    -You
    -Pick your BOYS up
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    You pick your BOYS up
    from school! -Yeah
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    It was cute! Yeah.
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    And then like you could
    show off your boys to like
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    other boys.
    -Right
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    -(Stammers)
    -Like check out my neighborhood boys!
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    And then it's a meeting of the boys
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    Aren't these boys so cool?
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    But the boys also always kind of
    butt heads because it's like
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    -Yo I'm his boy! (x2)
    -I'm his boy!
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    (From Both) You're his schoolboy (x2)
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    -I'm a neighborhood BOY!
    -Yeah yeah yeah!
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    And we were walking home
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    And I was listening to the Glamorous
    song
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    Like I think it was playing an actually
    on my next tilt
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    Cause I had it as a ring
    Ludicrous was part of a ring-tone
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    (Laughing) You're ring-tone was
    Glamorous!?
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    Take it easy
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    (Stammering)
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    The LUDA part of it
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    -Got it
    -And he - and part of it goes
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    "If you ain't got no money take your
    broke ass home"
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    And I remember I was walking
    and we were listening to it
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    And you were like you happened
    to be looking at me
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    So of course I was performing
    (Laughing)
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    And then, I was just like to myself
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    I was like (singing) if you aint got
    no money take your broke ass home
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    I remember that
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    And you fucking lost it
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    Because you smacked your ass so hard
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    -You were like BROKE-ASS HOME
    -Well, you know
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    -If you go for it (x2)
    -I was like what is this kid doing?
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    I actually do remember that now
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    Do you?
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    I do, us and DA BOYS
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    It was (Exclaims)
    DA-DA BOYZ!
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    I know, (laughs)
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    DA BOYZ!
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    And how are you doing?
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    I'm not, too well actually
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    Today, this morning, I walked
    my dog
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    And he took a poooop
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    Again with the poop talk Joey
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    -Ah, it's not my poop it's my dog's poop!
    -Not very etiquettely sound
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    Dog's shit
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    Mhmm
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    But there's a reason why I'm
    bringing it up
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    So my dog--Every time you bring
    up dog shit there's a reason Joey
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    Just want to make that very clear
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    (Sighs) Anyway (Laughter)
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    This morning I was walking my dog
    and he poops
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    And I pick it up
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    Bare-hand?
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    Why would I do that
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    I don't know well you're
    a little wild lately
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    No, I might as well be bare-handed
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    You're bare-knuckle brawler pick
    up your dog's shit?
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    No! I (Stammers) put a bag on my hand
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    Went- Picked it up....
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    Hole in the bag
    (GASP)
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    Shit hand
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    I had shit hands
    (Laughter)
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    For the whole walk
    How far, how far were you from home?
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    (Laughter)
    Why did you say that?
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    I was like a block and a half
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    So you, so what did you do?
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    I went like this on the concrete
    Slaps table
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    And I was like- I didn't have
    a TON of shit on my hand
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    My question was gonna be like
    consistency of the shit
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    Was it like, did it leave
    residue on your hand?
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    (Affirmative noises)
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    -Visible residue?
    -Visible
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    Well- not INVISIBLE?
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    -Well can I ask you a question?
    -Ask me
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    If you had touched it and your thumb
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    Or your hand had touched it
    but it didn't leave poop markings
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    on your hand. Would you take it
    that serious?
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    Yes
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    Oh ok good, good good.
    I just want to make sure
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    No (Stammers) so I wiped my
    hand on the concrete
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    And just walked home like this
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    Did you scrape-EW-
    Did you scrape your hand?
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    Basically-I didn't, I mean I didn't
    rub it against the concrete
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    So you just walked home like
    you were fucking like raising your hand?
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    Like I'm like scrubbing it for surgery
    it's like
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    But I was very pee-ed off
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    Oh well I would assume so
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    And I just yelled at him
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    It was your dog's fault
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    Well it was the bag's fault
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    -But he was the one
    -You had to blame an organic being
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    -in the area
    -I had to yeah
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    Not you
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    Something with a heart beat was
    getting screamed at
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    and it wasn't gonna be me
    (Laughter)
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    It's his fault
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    -Yeah -That you were not smart enough
    to check the bag first
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    Well I don't che- it's fresh out
    of the pack!
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    So, sue the company
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    Now I'm, now you're getting somewhere
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    Big Billionaire Joe-
    Yeah!-
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    Is gonna sue the company for
    everything they're worth
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    Is gonna sue the doggy bag industry
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    Because I mean this could be a
    huge law suit
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    You gotta imagine you're not the only
    person that's
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    accidentally raw-dogged a dog's shit!
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    Yeah I know
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    You gotta imagine- ah man I had a
    good fucking line there
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    And I FUCKED it up. It's alright
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    You were gonna say I was, I was
    getting raw-dogged?
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    I was gonna say "Like you weren't the only
    one that was raw-dogging your dog's raw"
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    That was the line you thought that was so
    sick?
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    (Laughter) That was the one?
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    (Mocking) "You were raw-dogging your
    dog's raw"
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    Yeah well you know you don't win em all
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    (Mumbling Noises)
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    To get in the middle of---
    yeah that's right
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    That's exactly the same thing-
    Damn that hurts though
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    Yeah it was not cool and then I
    also had this thought too right?
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    So I got dog shit on my hand and
    when I got to my apartment
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    I went straight to the sink and I like
    you know soap and water
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    -Soap and water yeah yeah
    -I'm washing my hands Aaand
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    I then I guess now it hit me
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    And I'm-I remember washing my
    hands and going
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    "Soap is incredible"
    (Laughter)
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    Cause I was going like bro all I have to
    do is put this liquid and go like this
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    and they're CLEAN?
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    Yeah- did you wash your doorknob?
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    My doorknob?
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    Yeah that you got into your-
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    Bro the hand stayed in the air
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    -It stayed back here
    -I didn't use it to do anything
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    You were basically like Kane
    looking to fucking choke slam somebody
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    Yeah, no, um, but, I was like
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    I was like "Wow"
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    Like I'm washing my hands and I'm going
    like "Wow soap is like nuts"
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    Like how do we have diseases? If we have
    soap it kills the germs!
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    Well guess what Joey? Things are
    stronger than soap.
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    I don't think so, 99.9 bro?
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    Alright, lemme ask you a question then
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    -Yeah, well wait hold on
    -No!
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    I meant sicknesses-OK-
    not like you know
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    There are certain sicknesses guess what?
    stronger than soap
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    What?
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    You think if you get fucking like a little
    -FLU?
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    bit of like, you know
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    STUFF, on ya? Like bad stuff? Ya know?
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    -I'm not gonna say it
    -Cum?
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    -No, well sure
    -Wait what were you talking about
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    I was gonna-there's another one
    3 letters in there
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    Cum
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    (Giggles) Well no
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    Blood?
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    It could be transmitted through blood
    as well
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    You think if people were like
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    "Let's just wash it with soap we're
    gonna be all good"
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    Oh AIDS
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    Well n- that's 4 letters
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    AID?
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    Something leads into that one
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    HIV
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    There it is, ok
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    (Laughing) You had to walk me there
    babe
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    Well I did-
    -I know
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    I led you to the water you were just too
    dumb to fucking sip.
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    Can you, can-can soap kill
    HIV? I don't know
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    No- Let me watch this
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    No-nono!
    -Nono
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    I'll do it!
    Ok go
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    No (Laughing)
  • 9:56 - 9:57
    No but I'm saying is this
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    Let's just say you put HIV in
    a petri dish right?
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    Like we get it, we have it
    concentrated right here
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    And you put a little Meyer's Soap
    in there
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    Ya know the organic kind that
    smells good
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    Those Doctor Brenner's ones
    that like
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    When you wash your body it's all cold
    and clean
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    Yeah it's like icy hot
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    Yeah-But if you put that in there
    nothing happens?
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    It doesn't like fight it? There's no
    fight?
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    I-I I would- I'm gonna go a little bit
    of a - of a little bit of a stretch here
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    I'm gonna go on a little bit of a stretch
    here
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    Cause people know how- how
    scientifically I guess inept we are?
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    Yeah-But I'm gonna confidently
    say that ain't gonna do it.
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    -No?
    -I don't think so.
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    I mean I know that you like
    if you're transmitting (giggles)
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    I mean I know that you got it
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    Once you're- You can't you can't just
    drink a bunch of soap
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    and you fixed your body
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    I think I believe if I'm not
    mistaken I knew someone that worked
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    At a club for years and got pricked
    with a needle
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    -And...
    -In a club?
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    There were like checking bags and
    stuff like that
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    Or they were going in someone's bag
    to grab something
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    -Got pricked with a needle
    -Just had a needle
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    It was uh a performer
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    -That clearly had a needle on them
    -Ok
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    I don't know why you're making
    it seem like this is out of the blue
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    -Who the fuck carries needles into clubs?
    -People that are addicts Joey
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    -That's what I was getting at!
    -I was saying like a syringe?
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    There's to my understanding
    there's a 'cocktail' they call it
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    Of pills -Yeah- that you could
    take every day for like 3 months
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    That'll completely wipe it,
    an early detection
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    What, (Mumbles) Really?
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    Early detection-my understanding
    I don't wanna speak, ya know
  • 11:21 - 11:23
    (Stammering)
  • 11:23 - 11:26
    What did that have to do with soap?
  • 11:26 - 11:28
    I don't know if soap is in those
    cocktails
  • 11:28 - 11:32
    I think (Laughter) in truth like
    I don't think soap can do it
  • 11:32 - 11:36
    -I'm not saying it could cure anything
    -Can I ask you a serious question?
  • 11:36 - 11:39
    But like it prevents a lot and then
    also think about this right?
  • 11:40 - 11:42
    Airborne illnesses like the flu
  • 11:42 - 11:45
    It could stain the air, air particles
    whatever
  • 11:46 - 11:50
    Why haven't we (Laughs) This is
    so stupid
  • 11:50 - 11:52
    Why haven't we made like an air soap?
  • 11:52 - 11:53
    You know what I'm saying?
  • 11:53 - 11:56
    I think we have you ever see those
    movies where people step into chambers
  • 11:56 - 11:58
    And it goes "SKSSSSSS"
  • 11:58 - 12:00
    Yeah but like why isn't it like accessible
    Like if-
  • 12:01 - 12:02
    Let's say I was sick right?
  • 12:02 - 12:05
    Because Big Soap doesn't want everyone
    to be clean
  • 12:05 - 12:06
    I know that's what I'm saying!
  • 12:06 - 12:08
    Then Big Medicine doesn't make their
    money Joey!
  • 12:08 - 12:10
    Well yeah Big Pharma
  • 12:10 - 12:12
    Big- Whoah- I said Big Medicine
    you're going after Big Pharma
  • 12:12 - 12:13
    That's the same thing
  • 12:13 - 12:16
    Well yeah, but I don't wanna be
    using their actual name
  • 12:16 - 12:18
    The Government, you know what I'm
    saying?
  • 12:18 - 12:19
    It's like Voldemort - yeah
  • 12:19 - 12:20
    -Don't say their full name
    -We don't say
  • 12:20 - 12:21
    They Who Shall Not Be Named
  • 12:21 - 12:22
    Yeah (Giggles)
  • 12:22 - 12:25
    But like you know what I'm saying
    like if I had the flu
  • 12:25 - 12:27
    Like people would just like oh just
    leave your windows open it'll clear out
  • 12:27 - 12:31
    But like what if I had a spray
    that I could just spray (Laughs)
  • 12:31 - 12:32
    Well yeah if you had like
  • 12:32 - 12:33
    So-Air Soap!
  • 12:33 - 12:36
    If there was just something you
    could just like SKKKS
  • 12:36 - 12:37
    And it just, you're good
  • 12:37 - 12:41
    Wait why did you shoot into your neck?
    I was thinking-Did you see Glass Onion?
  • 12:41 - 12:41
    Yes
  • 12:41 - 12:44
    They do that in that movie do you remember
    at the beginning?
  • 12:44 - 12:45
    Oh yeah that's right
  • 12:45 - 12:46
    (Grunts) yeah I, I don't
  • 12:46 - 12:51
    I'm sure there's something out there but
    again Big Medicine, Big Soap
  • 12:51 - 12:53
    -They don't want us to know about it
    -I know
  • 12:53 - 12:54
    Can I ask you a question?
  • 12:54 - 12:56
    And I really want you to be honest with me
  • 12:56 - 12:57
    I'm - ok
  • 12:57 - 12:59
    Do you think like
  • 12:59 - 13:01
    when, when if you have a tickle
    in your throat
  • 13:01 - 13:02
    -Yeah
    -A little tickle
  • 13:02 - 13:04
    -I hate that
    -I hate it because
  • 13:04 - 13:05
    Then I'm dead in a week
  • 13:06 - 13:08
    -Oh no just cause I have to cough forever
    -Oh yeah
  • 13:08 - 13:10
    -You have a tickle in your throat
    -Yeah
  • 13:11 - 13:15
    Do you believe that like drinking like
    carbonated beverages
  • 13:15 - 13:18
    -Does anything good for it?
    -I don't know probably
  • 13:18 - 13:20
    Because in my head
  • 13:20 - 13:21
    It hurts when I swallow it
  • 13:21 - 13:23
    I've convinced myself
  • 13:23 - 13:26
    If I have a tickle in my throat
    if I just drink a seltzer like
  • 13:26 - 13:29
    -Something with a just like a BITE
    -SHARP, something SHARP
  • 13:29 - 13:30
    It's gonna kill it!
  • 13:30 - 13:32
    -Yeah cause it'll like
    -Cause it'll just fuck it up!
  • 13:32 - 13:34
    Or, it'll scratch it for me
  • 13:34 - 13:36
    Well not just scratch it
    but like it'll the bubbles will
  • 13:36 - 13:39
    lift it and then get it down
    and then its gone
  • 13:39 - 13:42
    Well what do you think a tickle is
    that you could lift it?
  • 13:42 - 13:43
    -I don't know
    -It's just a feeling!
  • 13:43 - 13:45
    -But in my head
    -You can't lift a feeling Frank
  • 13:45 - 13:47
    In my head like if I have a tickle
    in my throat I'm like
  • 13:47 - 13:49
    yo I'm just gonna drink
    seltzer and I'll be good
  • 13:49 - 13:52
    I understand that because I'm
    like the bubbles will scratch it for me
  • 13:52 - 13:55
    Not just scratch it but like they'll
    fucking kill whatever's back there
  • 13:55 - 13:57
    Cause that's a powerful drink!
  • 13:57 - 13:58
    I don't think there's anything to kill
  • 13:58 - 14:00
    Well I, I think that-
    It's like trying to kill a twitch!
  • 14:00 - 14:01
    If it's an early onset of a tickle Joey!
  • 14:01 - 14:04
    If it's an early onset of like a
    cold or something
  • 14:04 - 14:05
    Oooooh-
    -You know what I'm saying?
  • 14:05 - 14:08
    Ok, I said that soap (giggles)
  • 14:09 - 14:12
    Might be able to like kill a disease
  • 14:12 - 14:14
    If it's on a table, not if it's in a body
  • 14:14 - 14:17
    If it's on a table though, put some
    soap on it.
  • 14:17 - 14:20
    You think seltzer's gonna prevent
    a cold?
  • 14:20 - 14:23
    Oh I'm not, I'm not saying I'm smart here
  • 14:23 - 14:26
    I'm just saying, I'm, I'm asking if you've
    ever thought that
  • 14:26 - 14:28
    I, I don't think about it like like
  • 14:28 - 14:29
    Stopping a cold-
    Because Seltzer
  • 14:29 - 14:31
    is like you know like, like, like
  • 14:31 - 14:34
    The Roman soldier of drinks
    like it gets in there
  • 14:34 - 14:35
    and it just fucking clears the way
  • 14:35 - 14:36
    Yeaaaah
  • 14:36 - 14:38
    And I'm wondering if you've ever thought
    that
  • 14:38 - 14:41
    Because I've convinced myself that
    if I'm not feeling well
  • 14:41 - 14:43
    just a bottle of ginger ale will just
    do the trick
  • 14:43 - 14:44
    Well my mom used to say that
  • 14:44 - 14:47
    like when my tummy was Bo-obly-
    -when you got a little tummy upysetty
  • 14:47 - 14:50
    (Laughs) Why did you do that?
  • 14:50 - 14:55
    Um I would drink a seltzer and then
    I mean I would drink a ginger ale
  • 14:55 - 14:57
    Well Like-
    -And then I just felt the same
  • 14:57 - 14:58
    Well no-
    What kind of a (Laughing)
  • 14:58 - 15:02
    Like Schweps and fucking
    Canada Dry it's
  • 15:02 - 15:03
    high fructose corn syrup but
  • 15:04 - 15:05
    Ginger
  • 15:05 - 15:07
    As, as a, as a root-
  • 15:07 - 15:07
    Right
  • 15:07 - 15:10
    Does have medicinal properties for like
    upset stomachs
  • 15:10 - 15:12
    Do you wanna hear something really
    interesting?
  • 15:12 - 15:13
    Sure
  • 15:13 - 15:14
    Two things actually
  • 15:14 - 15:18
    One, didn't know what an avacodo was
    untill I was like 16
  • 15:18 - 15:20
    Swear to god I'm in the same boat.
  • 15:20 - 15:21
    Also
  • 15:21 - 15:23
    -Ginger, like real ginger
    -Yeah
  • 15:24 - 15:25
    24?
  • 15:25 - 15:27
    -Oh my god that's old Joey
    -Old!
  • 15:27 - 15:29
    -That's, that's 2016
    -I like
  • 15:29 - 15:31
    -Dude there--Ginger was not around
    -Oh
  • 15:31 - 15:33
    My family never had ginger in the house
  • 15:33 - 15:36
    Turmeric? 3 years ago.
    (Laughing)
  • 15:36 - 15:39
    Like, these powders as things that
    are just like---
  • 15:39 - 15:41
    You only cooked with salt-
    Have you ever seen real tumeric?
  • 15:41 - 15:43
    -Yeah
    -Like the root?
  • 15:43 - 15:44
    Yeah yeah same with ginger
  • 15:44 - 15:45
    I-I love both of them
  • 15:45 - 15:46
    I-Bro....
  • 15:46 - 15:48
    -Very spicy
    -Yeah
  • 15:48 - 15:50
    -It's a spicy meatball-
    -Yeah (Laughing)
  • 15:50 - 15:52
    Well it's because in your house
  • 15:52 - 15:53
    God Bless your mother
  • 15:53 - 15:54
    -You were
    -Yeah
  • 15:54 - 15:58
    Pretty hell-bent on only cooking
    with salt and pepper there was no spice
  • 15:58 - 16:00
    Don't even fucking start this and talk
    shit about my
  • 16:01 - 16:02
    amazing cook mother
  • 16:02 - 16:04
    Uh-Your mom is legitimately
  • 16:04 - 16:07
    And I say this with much praise
  • 16:07 - 16:10
    One of the best cooks I have met in my
    entire life (Laughing)
  • 16:10 - 16:11
    She is really good
  • 16:11 - 16:12
    But take it easy, alright?
  • 16:12 - 16:13
    -Yeah
    -Um (Laughing)
  • 16:15 - 16:18
    No I-I didn't... bro avacados?
  • 16:18 - 16:19
    Came out of nowhere!
  • 16:19 - 16:21
    -Absolutely out of nowhere!
    -Bro!
  • 16:21 - 16:23
    It was like 2000 and 10?
  • 16:23 - 16:25
    And people were like -avocados!
  • 16:25 - 16:28
    And I was like "woah woah woah
    where have these been forever"
  • 16:28 - 16:30
    Later, way later than that
  • 16:30 - 16:30
    Also, kale
  • 16:31 - 16:32
    Not a thing
  • 16:32 - 16:33
    -Kale--Bro I'm conv-
    -Kale!
  • 16:33 - 16:35
    If someone told me kale was invented
    in 2017
  • 16:35 - 16:36
    -I'd be like yep.
    -Yeah
  • 16:36 - 16:38
    - Absolutely 100%
    -It's like we just we found it
  • 16:38 - 16:40
    One day someone just said kale
    chips
  • 16:40 - 16:42
    And I've never heard of kale since
  • 16:42 - 16:42
    It's insane
  • 16:42 - 16:44
    And I don't know where it came from
  • 16:44 - 16:46
    It it's Big-Big-Big Salad
  • 16:46 - 16:47
    Big Leaf!
  • 16:47 - 16:48
    (Laughing) Big Leaf yeah!
  • 16:48 - 16:50
    That's what it - Big Leafy Green!
  • 16:50 - 16:52
    -Big Leafy Green is at it
    -Yeah
  • 16:52 - 16:52
    Oh
  • 16:53 - 16:53
    Oh
  • 16:53 - 16:55
    Welp, well Ant's wearing
    a dildo on his head (laughing)
  • 16:55 - 16:56
    -There's all kinds of stuff going on
  • 16:56 - 16:58
    Can't say dildo now we're
    demonetized!
  • 16:58 - 17:00
    You thought that was gonna
    demonetize us?
  • 17:01 - 17:01
    (Laughing)
  • 17:01 - 17:04
    Oh Keith's got a purple one!
    Keith's got a dildo on his head now
  • 17:04 - 17:05
    I don't know what's happening outside
    on these walls
  • 17:05 - 17:06
    But this is what goes on
  • 17:06 - 17:09
    I gotta say I'm actually pretty
    proud of Keith for wearing that
  • 17:09 - 17:12
    because I did not anticipate a
    fucking falop-phalic shape
  • 17:12 - 17:13
    to be anywhere near his mouth
  • 17:13 - 17:14
    It's not a phallic shape it's a
    straight up
  • 17:14 - 17:16
    rubber dick on his head
  • 17:16 - 17:18
    Silicone but who's counting?
  • 17:18 - 17:19
    Silly cone?
  • 17:19 - 17:19
    Sillicone
  • 17:19 - 17:21
    I thought you said silly cone (laughs)
  • 17:21 - 17:22
    -Silly cone!
    -Um yeah
  • 17:22 - 17:23
    Dude I swear to god avocados-
  • 17:23 - 17:25
    Dude speaking of silicone sorry
  • 17:25 - 17:28
    Your turn (Laughter)
  • 17:29 - 17:30
    Go ahead!
  • 17:30 - 17:33
    Nonono, the floor is yours...
    Chief!
  • 17:33 - 17:35
    It's not even a good story (laughing)
  • 17:35 - 17:38
    Yeah no no, go! (laughing)
  • 17:39 - 17:41
    Your turn (laughing)
  • 17:42 - 17:44
    Um, I was gonna say-
    (bursts with laughter)
  • 17:44 - 17:46
    This is so stu-
  • 17:46 - 17:48
    -I hate that I'm forced to say it now
    -I, nonono now you need
  • 17:48 - 17:51
    to complete the story so the world can
    see what you interupted me for
  • 17:51 - 17:53
    The silicone it reminded me of
  • 17:53 - 17:58
    my dad filled in like the cracks of our
    window in the bathroom with silicone
  • 17:58 - 18:00
    and one day I sat there and I just
  • 18:01 - 18:02
    picked all of it out
  • 18:02 - 18:05
    and he was mad at at me
    and that's the whole story
  • 18:05 - 18:09
    (Clapping)
    Awesome!
  • 18:09 - 18:15
    We are all better human beings for having
    listened to that stupid fucking story
  • 18:15 - 18:18
    (Laughter)
    -Wait to go!
  • 18:18 - 18:21
    -Go ahead tell me, tell me-
    -All I was gonna say was
  • 18:21 - 18:22
    -Avocado, came out of nowhere
    -Yeah
  • 18:22 - 18:24
    -Kale came out of nowhere
    -Yes
  • 18:24 - 18:26
    Everything being
    buffalo chicken flavor
  • 18:26 - 18:27
    -Came out of nowhere
    -MMMMMM
  • 18:27 - 18:29
    Not complaining about it
  • 18:29 - 18:30
    But definitely came out of nowhere
  • 18:30 - 18:32
    Buffalo chicken pizza...
  • 18:32 - 18:34
    Big blowup, big ol' blowup
  • 18:35 - 18:36
    Big BLBLOW up?
  • 18:36 - 18:37
    (Laughs) Big blow up
  • 18:37 - 18:39
    -They came out of nowhere
    -(indiscernible mocking noises)
  • 18:39 - 18:41
    (Laughing) I had - Dog give
    big old bread bowl
  • 18:42 - 18:44
    What else came out of nowhere back then?
  • 18:44 - 18:46
    There was so much stuff
  • 18:46 - 18:48
    Like, that I feel like I wasn't
  • 18:48 - 18:51
    Maybe I should open the door and be
    like "Hey guys you know it's cool"
  • 18:51 - 18:54
    -We're recording a show in here
    -We're not recording anything you pieces
    of fuck!
  • 18:54 - 18:56
    Real professional podcast you fucking
    idiots! (Laughing)
  • 18:56 - 18:57
    Yeah but I don't know
  • 18:57 - 18:59
    Uh there was other shit that
    kind of came out of nowhere
  • 18:59 - 19:02
    But anyway, this all started
    because I grabbed my dog's shit
  • 19:02 - 19:04
    -Yeah well that's alright
    -And
  • 19:04 - 19:08
    I actually something happened to me
    that I think you would really appreciate
  • 19:08 - 19:10
    You know me Joey
  • 19:10 - 19:11
    You know me
  • 19:11 - 19:13
    I show, a part of way I show
    love, my love language
  • 19:14 - 19:15
    Is I make fun of people
  • 19:15 - 19:16
    We-our friend group
  • 19:16 - 19:17
    We've been doing it our
    (Motorboat noises) lives
  • 19:17 - 19:19
    We've literally done it for
    20 years now
  • 19:20 - 19:22
    And, I'm a big proponent of like
  • 19:22 - 19:25
    If you can dish it out you better
    be able to take it
  • 19:25 - 19:25
    Ok
  • 19:25 - 19:27
    And you've told me before I've
    had some
  • 19:27 - 19:30
    Some clapbacks that hit a little
    too close to home
  • 19:30 - 19:30
    Uhhh yeah
  • 19:30 - 19:33
    -A little (Laughing) sometimes
    -You're pretty relentless I would say
  • 19:33 - 19:37
    Well, listen don't poke the king
    if you're not ready for the claws
  • 19:37 - 19:37
    you know what I'm saying?
  • 19:37 - 19:39
    Not an expression, Frankie, not one!
  • 19:39 - 19:40
    That's not one
  • 19:40 - 19:43
    -Don't poke the bear, I'm sorry
    -Don't poke the bear
  • 19:43 - 19:44
    Don't come for the king
  • 19:44 - 19:45
    If you come for the king you best--
  • 19:45 - 19:47
    You don't come for the king
    if you're gonna miss
  • 19:47 - 19:49
    (Stammers) Ok yeah
  • 19:49 - 19:52
    -So, I was joking around with Miles yesterday
    -Yeah
  • 19:52 - 19:55
    So, Miles, for those you guys that don't
    know him, my stepson
  • 19:55 - 19:59
    Fucking incredible -- such a kind young
    man
  • 19:59 - 20:01
    But, I've always told him like bro listen
  • 20:01 - 20:03
    If you're gonna like if you're gonna joke
    with people
  • 20:03 - 20:05
    Make sure they can take it
  • 20:05 - 20:08
    And if they're getting to you like
    clap right back at them!
  • 20:08 - 20:08
    You know what I mean?
  • 20:08 - 20:10
    Be a little relentless if you need
    to be relentless
  • 20:10 - 20:12
    -Ya know? (laughing)
    -You're telling him to do this?
  • 20:12 - 20:15
    I-Well I'm telling him, I'm
    telling him in a responsible setting
  • 20:15 - 20:17
    Because he's also the sweetest
    fucking kid on the planet
  • 20:17 - 20:19
    He literally one day he caught
  • 20:19 - 20:21
    There was a fly with a damaged
    wing
  • 20:21 - 20:22
    That I think I actually killed
  • 20:22 - 20:26
    And, he-he fed it and nurtured
    it and then it died and he was
  • 20:26 - 20:27
    in tears.
  • 20:28 - 20:29
    He fed a fly?
  • 20:29 - 20:31
    Yeah, that's how sweet this
    fucking kid is
  • 20:31 - 20:32
    What do you feed flies?
  • 20:32 - 20:33
    Cantaloupe
  • 20:34 - 20:35
    Oh it was a fruit fly
  • 20:35 - 20:37
    No it was a fly, a house fly
  • 20:37 - 20:39
    -It was- Flies eat anything literally shit
    -That's true
  • 20:40 - 20:41
    -Um, but
    -Ok
  • 20:41 - 20:44
    So one day - er yesterday we were
    going back and forth at each other
  • 20:45 - 20:45
    And he goes
  • 20:47 - 20:48
    You look like diarrhea
  • 20:48 - 20:50
    And I'm like I look like diarrhea?
  • 20:50 - 20:51
    Damn dude that's racist!
  • 20:51 - 20:54
    Well- ok
    (Laughter)
  • 20:54 - 20:56
    Like you know what? Actually
  • 20:57 - 20:59
    Ok, I didn't even think about it like that
  • 20:59 - 21:01
    -"You look like diarrhea"
    -Yeah!
  • 21:01 - 21:04
    And then I'm like "Alright well
    you look like" you know "a fart"
  • 21:05 - 21:05
    And he goes
  • 21:06 - 21:07
    This is his response he goes
  • 21:07 - 21:10
    "You look like a fart that just came
    out of someone's butt
  • 21:10 - 21:11
    and is in the wind"
  • 21:12 - 21:13
    I was like oh that kind of hurt?
  • 21:13 - 21:14
    (Laughing) -What?
    -And then
  • 21:14 - 21:16
    Yeah well this is the best part
  • 21:17 - 21:18
    So then I'm like alright
  • 21:18 - 21:19
    I joke with him
  • 21:19 - 21:20
    And we were going to see the Mario
  • 21:20 - 21:22
    Super Mario Brothers movie
  • 21:22 - 21:24
    And I go, "You know who you like?"
  • 21:24 - 21:27
    "You look like someone that's
    not going to the movies today"
  • 21:27 - 21:30
    And he goes- Bro,
    snaps fingers like this
  • 21:30 - 21:31
    I-I watch his face go like this
  • 21:31 - 21:32
    He goes -
  • 21:32 - 21:34
    You know what you look like?
  • 21:34 - 21:35
    (Laughter)
  • 21:35 - 21:37
    And I go oh shit!
    (Clap)
  • 21:37 - 21:38
    I didn't-
  • 21:38 - 21:39
    You know what you like?
  • 21:39 - 21:41
    Pussy (Laughing)
  • 21:41 - 21:42
    I go, I go
  • 21:42 - 21:45
    You know what you look like
    you look like someone who's not
  • 21:45 - 21:46
    going to the movies today
  • 21:46 - 21:48
    And he goes you know what you
    look like?
  • 21:48 - 21:50
    You look like someone that's not
    gonna be a stepdad anymore
  • 21:50 - 21:53
    (Laughter)
  • 21:53 - 21:54
    (Laughter)
    OH MY GOD
  • 21:55 - 21:57
    (Laughter)
    What?
  • 21:58 - 22:00
    -I'm like-
    (Laughing)
  • 22:00 - 22:01
    -My mouth drops
    -He said that?
  • 22:01 - 22:02
    Yeah bro!
    (Laughing)
  • 22:02 - 22:03
    My mouth dropped
  • 22:03 - 22:04
    Becca's mouth dropped
  • 22:04 - 22:05
    We started dying laughing
  • 22:05 - 22:07
    And I went up to him and I just
  • 22:07 - 22:09
    gave him the biggest fattest
    wettest dap
  • 22:09 - 22:10
    Wettest?
  • 22:10 - 22:13
    I was washing the dishes
    (Laughter)
  • 22:14 - 22:16
    And I said I was like Bro
  • 22:16 - 22:18
    Fucking good on you dude!
  • 22:18 - 22:20
    What does that mean is he gonna
    like kill you?
  • 22:20 - 22:23
    I don't know! But whatever
    it was, that's what I'm talking like
  • 22:23 - 22:25
    And that was such a proud dad
  • 22:25 - 22:26
    That's such a weird thing to be
    proud of
  • 22:26 - 22:28
    -It's like oh you took it too far thank u
    -But in that moment
  • 22:28 - 22:29
    I was like "YESSS"
  • 22:30 - 22:32
    like I've done something to
    this kids life
  • 22:32 - 22:33
    That's incredible
  • 22:33 - 22:34
    Bro he fucking like
  • 22:34 - 22:35
    BANG. Like
  • 22:35 - 22:37
    (Laughing) -You know what you look like?
    -Like
  • 22:37 - 22:38
    Like fucking like, Hitman sytle
  • 22:39 - 22:41
    Fucking bullet in the back of
    the head
  • 22:41 - 22:43
    Really wish that went
    one more round
  • 22:43 - 22:44
    Yeah well, no (Laughs)
  • 22:45 - 22:46
    I said to Becca I-I
  • 22:46 - 22:48
    Like afterward we were
    dying laughing about it
  • 22:48 - 22:50
    And I was like, "I could've went back"
  • 22:50 - 22:51
    And she's like "I know"
  • 22:51 - 22:53
    (Laughing) I could've went back!
  • 22:53 - 22:55
    Just like, "I'm gonna go have sex
    with your mom"
  • 22:55 - 22:56
    (Laughter)
  • 22:57 - 22:58
    You know who you look like?
  • 22:59 - 23:01
    Nah I'm not gonna I can't,
    I can't do it
  • 23:01 - 23:02
    -He might see this one day
    -Yeah that's too much
  • 23:02 - 23:04
    But bro I was so proud in that
    moment because
  • 23:05 - 23:06
    That's so funny
  • 23:06 - 23:06
    I saw me!
  • 23:07 - 23:09
    And like it's mome- it's so
    stupid but like
  • 23:09 - 23:10
    it's moments like that
  • 23:10 - 23:12
    Like as a stepfather
  • 23:12 - 23:13
    Like all you want to do is
    have like an impact
  • 23:13 - 23:15
    a positive impact on this
    child's life
  • 23:16 - 23:17
    In that moment
  • 23:17 - 23:19
    Him absolutely tearing
    me to shreds
  • 23:19 - 23:22
    In front of my wife,
    also his mom
  • 23:22 - 23:24
    And my fucking two daughters
  • 23:24 - 23:26
    -The kid won
    -The kid won
  • 23:26 - 23:27
    And I could-- I couldn't-I went
  • 23:27 - 23:28
    We went to the movies
  • 23:28 - 23:29
    I got him anything he
    fucking wanted
  • 23:29 - 23:30
    Yeah he needed to get a
    fucking Slushee
  • 23:30 - 23:33
    I was like - Nah no Slushee
    those shits are dogshit
  • 23:33 - 23:34
    We got Buncher-Crunch
  • 23:34 - 23:36
    We got FAT-OL popcorn
  • 23:36 - 23:37
    in the collector's tin
  • 23:37 - 23:39
    Buncher-Crunch?
  • 23:39 - 23:40
    He-His choice man
  • 23:40 - 23:42
    I said I was like "Bro go pick
    whatever you want"
  • 23:42 - 23:43
    Cookie dough though
  • 23:44 - 23:45
    He picked it
  • 23:45 - 23:46
    I'm saying, like
  • 23:46 - 23:47
    What would you get though?
  • 23:47 - 23:49
    What do you usually get when
    you go to the movies?
  • 23:49 - 23:49
    Milk-Duds
  • 23:50 - 23:51
    Uh-huh
  • 23:51 - 23:54
    Or.... Nerd's Gummy Clusters
  • 23:54 - 23:56
    Those are good
  • 23:56 - 23:57
    They are back baby!
  • 23:57 - 23:59
    You don't like the big frozen
  • 23:59 - 24:01
    The fro- you wanna bring fro- you
    wanna bring
  • 24:01 - 24:04
    -Ice cream into the movies Joey?
    -Nono like the slushies that they have
  • 24:04 - 24:05
    No, because they're mostly air!
  • 24:06 - 24:07
    I want a slush puppy
  • 24:08 - 24:10
    Yeah those are more wet
  • 24:10 - 24:10
    Yeah!
  • 24:12 - 24:14
    (Laughter)
    -That's where
  • 24:14 - 24:16
    That's what I want!
    (Laughter)
  • 24:16 - 24:17
    You're head was just bouncing - "yeah!"
  • 24:17 - 24:18
    That's what I want Joey!
  • 24:18 - 24:19
    Damn
  • 24:19 - 24:19
    Oh and by the way
  • 24:19 - 24:22
    Hypothetically if I were to have
    found a slush puppy on ebay
  • 24:23 - 24:25
    Would we be able to get it in
    here in the studio?
  • 24:26 - 24:27
    Hold on
  • 24:30 - 24:31
    -Yeah
    -Ok
  • 24:31 - 24:32
    But like
    (Laughter)
  • 24:32 - 24:34
    What did- What is required?
  • 24:34 - 24:36
    Well- Damn that would be so sick
  • 24:37 - 24:37
    Yeah!
  • 24:37 - 24:38
    If we had a slush puppy machine?
  • 24:38 - 24:40
    I just wanna know like now that
    I am the
  • 24:40 - 24:42
    Chief Fun Officer of Sant A Gauto Studios
  • 24:42 - 24:45
    Am I allowed to make like stupid
  • 24:46 - 24:47
    Purchases the way that you do?
  • 24:48 - 24:50
    (Chuckling) What do I do?
  • 24:50 - 24:53
    A clock out there that just says
    "Irrelevant" or whatever it says
  • 24:53 - 24:54
    I took- (Laughing)
  • 24:54 - 24:55
    What does it say?
  • 24:55 - 24:56
    -It says irrelevant
    -Irrelevant yeah
  • 24:56 - 24:57
    There you go
  • 24:57 - 24:58
    Um
  • 24:58 - 25:00
    -No I-
    -An espresso machine
  • 25:00 - 25:02
    that has been used probably 0 times?
  • 25:02 - 25:03
    No Greg uses that all the time it is
  • 25:03 - 25:05
    It sounds like a car
    (Laughing)
  • 25:05 - 25:07
    -It literally is that loud
    -Ok
  • 25:07 - 25:08
    Its so loud
  • 25:08 - 25:08
    Ok (stammers)
  • 25:08 - 25:12
    Multiple phallic dildo shaped toys
  • 25:12 - 25:14
    All of these things were free
    by the way
  • 25:14 - 25:16
    -That you're naming
    -The espresso machine?
  • 25:16 - 25:17
    That was like his Mom's
  • 25:17 - 25:18
    or something
  • 25:19 - 25:21
    How does Mom get us a Slush
    Puppy machine dawg?
  • 25:21 - 25:23
    No she had one she was like
  • 25:23 - 25:23
    gonna get rid of it he's like
  • 25:23 - 25:25
    "I'll just take it and put it
    in the studio"
  • 25:25 - 25:26
    Oh damn alright well
  • 25:26 - 25:27
    -Yeah and then the clock
    -I just--
  • 25:27 - 25:28
    I gave to him as a gift
  • 25:28 - 25:30
    Yeah and then he hated it
    because it sucks
  • 25:31 - 25:31
    Well no it broke
  • 25:32 - 25:33
    and then he got it fixed
  • 25:33 - 25:35
    -And then he realized it sucks
    -And then (chuckles) And then
  • 25:35 - 25:37
    He's like "Oh I'm just gonna bring
    it to the studio"
  • 25:37 - 25:38
    I'm gonna just bring it to the studio
  • 25:38 - 25:38
    Yeah
    Yeah
  • 25:38 - 25:41
    Well, there you go I-I-I had to share
    that with you
  • 25:41 - 25:43
    because that's one of my favorite stories
  • 25:43 - 25:45
    (Sighs) That is a really good one
  • 25:45 - 25:47
    Um let's get to some ads here folks
  • 25:47 - 25:49
    The first one being Liquid IV
  • 25:49 - 25:52
    What did I forget to bring to the studio
    for Frankie today?
  • 25:52 - 25:53
    Liquid IV
  • 25:53 - 25:56
    But what did I steal from his personal
    collection and put in a bottle?
  • 25:56 - 25:58
    (Unanimous) -Liquid IV!
    -Liquid IV!
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    Uh we love Liquid IV here uh it is a
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    category winning hydration brand fueling
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    Um
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    Ok? Cause that was very fancy
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    You know things that you need
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    There's essential vitamins
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    And vitamin C
  • 26:20 - 26:23
    Uh, 3 times the electrolytes of
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    And you just pop open the little
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  • 26:26 - 26:28
    You know some water and you
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  • 26:28 - 26:29
    And you drink it
  • 26:29 - 26:31
    And they have incredible flavors
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    And they're always making new ones I feel like
  • 26:32 - 26:35
    My favorites are the strawberry
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    Keith was actually telling me he
    was like
  • 26:38 - 26:39
    "Did you get the st-"
  • 26:39 - 26:40
    Is that the strawberry lemonade?
  • 26:42 - 26:43
    YES
  • 26:43 - 26:45
    (Laughing) The strawberry lemonade
  • 26:45 - 26:47
    It's delicious that's why I was
    savoring that swallow
  • 26:47 - 26:48
    -Can I smell it?
    -Uh oh
  • 26:49 - 26:50
    Let me smell it
  • 26:51 - 26:53
    Let daddy get a whiff
  • 26:53 - 26:56
    Oh wow, definitely will
    have one of these later
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    But yeah they're great
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    Go get them
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    They're great to have when uh
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    But you can grab your
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    or get 20% off when you go to
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    That's 20% off anything you order
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    When you shop
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    using the promo code BASEMENT
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    Go get yourself some
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    It's like a treat, honestly
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    They're great!
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    But yeah, so go get it
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    And a you know hydrate yourself
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    Next here we have Stitch Fix
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    Stitch Fix is great because it's like
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    Without having to endlessly scroll through
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    You go on their site you take their style
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    And it's like
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    And you have your own personal stylist
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    You take their style quiz you let
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    What your fit is, you know
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    So you can get dressed and go!
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    And right now Stitch Fix is
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    Off of their first fix at
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    That is StitchFix.com/BASEMENT
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    Today, so, if you're thinking about
    stepping your style game up
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    And you want a second opinion on stuff
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    And I mean why wouldn't ya?
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    StitchFix.com/BASEMENT
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    Go get it folks
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    -That's all I'm gonna do for now
    -(Stammering)
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    And then you're gonna throw it over
    to me.
  • 28:26 - 28:29
    You're gonna alley oop that ball over
    in my court and guess what?
  • 28:29 - 28:30
    I'm gonna tell you about the Patreon
    (laughing)
  • 28:30 - 28:33
    Patreon.com/TheBasementYard
    (Claps) FOLKS
  • 28:33 - 28:35
    Not only did we have a record
    breaking March...
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    But we are already surpassing
    where we got to in March
  • 28:39 - 28:41
    With the amount of patrons and
    thank you so much
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    We really appreciate it!
  • 28:43 - 28:45
    patreon.com/TheBasementYard
    is the best way to support us!
  • 28:46 - 28:47
    We tell you that all the time
  • 28:48 - 28:50
    Do-do you have a couple bucks
    handy?
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    Do-do you wanna be a patreon
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    A patron and see a bunch of
    exclusive stuff?
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    Well guess what?
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    Patreon.com/TheBasementYard
  • 28:57 - 28:59
    You sign up for that first tier
    you get these weekly episodes
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    ONE week in advance
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    And then that second tier well
    that's ooooo
  • 29:02 - 29:05
    Where you get those exclusive
    Friday only episodes
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    Where Joe and I scream obscenities'
    at each other
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    But a little-a little more- a little more
    dirty
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    A little more raunchy
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    And guess what? Join today
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    Let's get to 19,000 baby
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    (Laughing)
  • 29:23 - 29:24
    The end of there
  • 29:25 - 29:27
    The next thing I have written on here
    is peanut butter
  • 29:27 - 29:28
    -Peanut butter, yes
    -What was that again?
  • 29:28 - 29:29
    So
  • 29:29 - 29:31
    I had a question for you because
    (Clears throat)
  • 29:31 - 29:34
    the TSA, who are the cops in the sky
  • 29:34 - 29:36
    -Well are they?
    -Well...
  • 29:36 - 29:38
    MMMM They're the cops in the airport
  • 29:38 - 29:40
    What's it-what does TSA stand for?
  • 29:40 - 29:41
    T-uhhh
  • 29:41 - 29:44
    -Travel
    -Trav-Travel Security Agency
  • 29:45 - 29:47
    Safety? Is it safety?
  • 29:47 - 29:49
    They're not- are they security?
    (Stammering)
  • 29:49 - 29:51
    Travel ssssecurity Agency
  • 29:52 - 29:54
    -What does TSA stand for?
    -Say the exact same thing again?
  • 29:54 - 29:54
    Yeah (Chuckles)
  • 29:54 - 29:56
    Transit?
    It's gotta be Transit
  • 29:57 - 29:58
    Transit
  • 30:00 - 30:01
    Transit?
  • 30:01 - 30:02
    Not Transit
  • 30:02 - 30:03
    Travel?
  • 30:03 - 30:04
    No
  • 30:05 - 30:06
    Trans is close
  • 30:07 - 30:08
    Transcontinental
  • 30:08 - 30:09
    T- No
  • 30:10 - 30:13
    Traaaaaaaaaaaaaaaansgender
    no
  • 30:14 - 30:16
    Transportation
  • 30:16 - 30:19
    Transportation...Safety--NO!
  • 30:19 - 30:22
    Security--Yay--Administration
  • 30:22 - 30:22
    -Boom
    -BAM!
  • 30:23 - 30:25
    Transportation Security Administration
    didn't know that
  • 30:25 - 30:27
    Recently ruled that
  • 30:28 - 30:30
    According to them peanut butter
    is a liquid
  • 30:30 - 30:33
    And-And before you say anything
  • 30:33 - 30:36
    I want to know where you stand
  • 30:36 - 30:37
    I know that's what you were gonna say
  • 30:37 - 30:40
    But I wanted to make sure you didn't
    interrupt me from introducing this
  • 30:40 - 30:41
    You feel good?
  • 30:41 - 30:45
    So.... Joe do you believe that peanut
    butter is a liquid?
  • 30:45 - 30:46
    It's not a liquid.
  • 30:46 - 30:47
    It's too... thick.
  • 30:47 - 30:49
    -It's a spread
    -How is it not a liquid?
  • 30:49 - 30:51
    Because it- Because it doesn't run
  • 30:51 - 30:54
    Yes it does it runs you ever see
    hot peanut butter?
  • 30:55 - 30:56
    Yeah if you heat it up!
  • 30:56 - 30:57
    Ok welp well there you go Joey!
  • 30:58 - 30:58
    Liquid!
  • 30:59 - 30:59
    No!
  • 31:00 - 31:00
    Liquid!
  • 31:00 - 31:02
    Is lava a liquid?
  • 31:03 - 31:03
    It runs
  • 31:04 - 31:05
    Yeah so does peanut butter
  • 31:05 - 31:08
    Wha-How did you just oh that doesn't
    even make sense what you just said!
  • 31:08 - 31:09
    Absolutely it does
  • 31:09 - 31:10
    Lava isn't peanut butter!
  • 31:10 - 31:12
    Lava, well Lava is not peanut butter
  • 31:12 - 31:14
    You could take a jar of peanut butter
    and do this
  • 31:14 - 31:15
    How is that a liquid?
  • 31:16 - 31:19
    Yeah! It's not gonna move but if
    you let it sit there it will
  • 31:19 - 31:20
    It'll poop out
  • 31:20 - 31:23
    -It's-It's a viscous. It's a thick boy
    -Yeaaaah!
  • 31:23 - 31:26
    -Or girl- or however peanutbutter
    -How all of our
  • 31:26 - 31:31
    -I support every every single way that
    the peanut butter identifies itself
    -Brothers and sisters of the earth
  • 31:31 - 31:34
    If you let peanut butter do its thing
    it's gonna run
  • 31:34 - 31:35
    It's not gonna run
  • 31:35 - 31:37
    It's just a thick liquid - a thickquid
  • 31:38 - 31:39
    It aint
  • 31:39 - 31:40
    It is though!
  • 31:40 - 31:41
    -But like if it's thick enough
    -So
  • 31:41 - 31:43
    So what's a - gimme a classic liquid
  • 31:44 - 31:44
    Water!
  • 31:44 - 31:47
    Ok! What's the difference between
    water and peanut butter
  • 31:47 - 31:49
    outside of the thickness?
  • 31:51 - 31:55
    (Stammers) Every possible property
    are different
  • 31:55 - 31:59
    MMMM Maybe the chemical compositions
    are a little different
  • 31:59 - 32:01
    But that doesn't mean I can't classify
    it as a liquid
  • 32:01 - 32:02
    It can
  • 32:03 - 32:04
    I just did it
  • 32:04 - 32:04
    I don't think so
  • 32:04 - 32:06
    What's next? Jelly's a liquid?
  • 32:06 - 32:07
    Yes
  • 32:08 - 32:10
    Is Jello a liquid?
    -Yes
  • 32:10 - 32:12
    It's just a cold liquid that's
    gotten hard!
  • 32:12 - 32:15
    Leave Jello at room temperature
    what happens?
  • 32:15 - 32:16
    It becomes waaateeeerrr
  • 32:17 - 32:18
    (Stammers) Does it?
  • 32:18 - 32:19
    Yeah that's why you have to
    refrigerate it
  • 32:19 - 32:20
    When's the last time you made Jello?
  • 32:20 - 32:21
    St. Patricks Day for me
  • 32:22 - 32:23
    (chuckles) You made Jello?
  • 32:23 - 32:24
    It's orange baby
  • 32:25 - 32:26
    Oh you gotta make green
    what are you doing?
  • 32:26 - 32:28
    Orange is the best flavored
    Jello
  • 32:28 - 32:29
    Mmkay
  • 32:29 - 32:30
    Um....
  • 32:31 - 32:32
    -Y-Yeah
    -Yeah I know
  • 32:33 - 32:36
    That's weird - that's probably the only
    thing where orange is like superior
  • 32:37 - 32:38
    MMMM Icepop
  • 32:39 - 32:40
    Orange Icepop
    -No
  • 32:40 - 32:42
    If you have like those ---
    the pushy
  • 32:42 - 32:43
    Flavor ice?
  • 32:43 - 32:44
    Flavor ice - orange
    -No
  • 32:44 - 32:46
    Or pink, or lightblue
  • 32:47 - 32:48
    It's blue and pink
  • 32:49 - 32:50
    Orange is up there too
  • 32:50 - 32:51
    EHHHHHHHH
  • 32:52 - 32:54
    If you have those ones that
    look like a double-sided dildo
  • 32:54 - 32:55
    That you break in the middle
  • 32:56 - 32:57
    Those are edible?
  • 32:59 - 33:01
    I thought those were like wax
  • 33:03 - 33:04
    You like those?
  • 33:04 - 33:06
    Yeah, cause guess what?
  • 33:06 - 33:07
    Sugar!
  • 33:08 - 33:08
    Yeah...
  • 33:09 - 33:11
    I didn't I didn't know
  • 33:11 - 33:12
    Not at all
  • 33:12 - 33:13
    I didn't know
  • 33:13 - 33:15
    They're too hard to open too
  • 33:15 - 33:18
    I just I don't like that the little
    like one side gets
  • 33:18 - 33:19
    like the nipple tip.
  • 33:19 - 33:21
    And you need to like you know like
  • 33:21 - 33:22
    You know like
  • 33:22 - 33:25
    It's like birthing an ice pop through this
    little fucking orifice
  • 33:25 - 33:27
    It's not as stretchy as say a 'gina
  • 33:27 - 33:30
    Yeah exactly 'gina's are super stretchy
  • 33:30 - 33:31
    I don't know if
  • 33:33 - 33:36
    I can support your stance on peanut
    butter not being a liquid
  • 33:36 - 33:37
    Because it is a liquid
  • 33:38 - 33:39
    It is liquified peanuts!
  • 33:39 - 33:42
    Also how many people are traveling with
    peanut butter that this is like an issue?
  • 33:43 - 33:44
    I-Yeah-People are weird for peanut butter
  • 33:44 - 33:45
    They love peanut butter!
  • 33:45 - 33:47
    Peanut butter is one of those things that
  • 33:47 - 33:48
    like people make it their whole personality
  • 33:48 - 33:49
    It's a culty condiment
  • 33:49 - 33:51
    It is a culty condiment it absolutely is
  • 33:51 - 33:53
    It is a condiment or just like a spread?
  • 33:53 - 33:54
    I think it's a little bit of both
    -I agree
  • 33:54 - 33:58
    I think condiments and spreads could
    be interchangeable
  • 33:59 - 34:00
    Yes, intersex
  • 34:00 - 34:01
    There's a fluidity between
  • 34:01 - 34:02
    -A spectrum
  • 34:02 - 34:04
    A spectrum that we need to respect
    -Yes
  • 34:04 - 34:06
    That we that yes that we-
  • 34:06 - 34:07
    I don't have a problem with it!
  • 34:07 - 34:08
    Me neither
  • 34:08 - 34:09
    You sure about that?
  • 34:09 - 34:10
    -Yes I'm very sure
    -Because you're sitting here
  • 34:10 - 34:12
    saying that peanut butter can't
    identify as a liquid
  • 34:12 - 34:16
    -I Actually I am saying that
    -You are saying that!
  • 34:16 - 34:19
    -And it's a little-
    -But I will say that it begins and ends
  • 34:19 - 34:21
    with peanut butter and it doesn't bleed
    out-
  • 34:21 - 34:22
    -Jelly is a liquid
  • 34:22 - 34:23
    Jelly?
  • 34:23 - 34:24
    Jelly
  • 34:25 - 34:27
    It's just a liquid that's got a little
    lumpies
  • 34:28 - 34:29
    (Laughter) Got a lumpies?
  • 34:29 - 34:30
    A lumpy
  • 34:30 - 34:33
    Um, (clap) peanut-but peanut butter
  • 34:33 - 34:37
    But-But Peanut!
    Peanut butter is way thicker
  • 34:37 - 34:38
    -Than a jelly
    -It is thicker
  • 34:38 - 34:39
    You're not wrong it's thicker
  • 34:40 - 34:42
    But you can get some runny
    as shit peanut butter
  • 34:42 - 34:44
    Cause guess what's in peanut butter?
    Oil
  • 34:44 - 34:45
    Yeah
  • 34:45 - 34:46
    And oil is a liquid right?
  • 34:47 - 34:48
    Yes
  • 34:48 - 34:49
    There you go
  • 34:49 - 34:50
    But it's mixed in
  • 34:50 - 34:52
    Yeah it's mixed in and that makes it
    part of it
  • 34:52 - 34:56
    They like everyone's like in the party
    together which makes peanut butter...
  • 34:56 - 34:57
    Liquid
  • 34:58 - 34:59
    Why'd you say peanut bUHtter
  • 34:59 - 35:00
    Peanut bUHtter
  • 35:00 - 35:02
    bUHtter (laughter)
  • 35:02 - 35:04
    Peanut BUHtter
  • 35:04 - 35:04
    Um......
  • 35:05 - 35:06
    No I don't (sighs)
  • 35:06 - 35:08
    Listen I know there's some scientific
    answer out there
    -Maybe some like
  • 35:08 - 35:10
    Maybe s- Maybe like the organic ones
  • 35:10 - 35:13
    -Cause you ever open an organic and
    -Like teddy's? it has it all floating at
  • 35:13 - 35:15
    -The top?
    -Yeah and you're like this is soaking wet
  • 35:15 - 35:17
    peanut butter in here
    -Yeah I gotta admit I wasn't a big chunky
  • 35:17 - 35:20
    guy and then I had Teddy's All Natural
    and I became a chunky boy
  • 35:21 - 35:22
    Really?
  • 35:22 - 35:24
    In multiple ways I became a chunky boy
    but like
  • 35:24 - 35:25
    (chuckles) for that peanut butter
  • 35:25 - 35:29
    I don't I don't like I'm not crazy about
    chunky peen buh
  • 35:29 - 35:33
    Big PB has a hold- it's being basically
    monopolized
  • 35:33 - 35:35
    (Hiccup) By Skippys and Jiff
  • 35:35 - 35:37
    Well I usually- I- I mean...
  • 35:38 - 35:39
    You go - you tell me what you do
  • 35:39 - 35:41
    I buy like
  • 35:41 - 35:45
    Wait, just before you say anything
    don't tell me you buy the 2 in 1
  • 35:45 - 35:47
    it's peanut butter and jelly in the same
    jar
  • 35:49 - 35:51
    What am I white trash?
  • 35:51 - 35:52
    Ok I just wanted to make sure
  • 35:52 - 35:54
    -Dylan does that confirmed
    -Does he really??
  • 35:54 - 35:55
    Confirmed Dylan's white trash
    -EW!
  • 35:55 - 35:57
    I don't know if he does that I remember
    he defended it once
  • 35:57 - 35:59
    I don't know if he's doing that I might be
    making up stuff and misremembering
  • 35:59 - 36:01
    But nonetheless (laughs)
    -We just drop Dylan
  • 36:02 - 36:06
    I buy like I don't buy the Skippy's or
    whatever
  • 36:06 - 36:11
    I buy like the- just a version of that
    just has - literally just peanuts and oil
  • 36:11 - 36:13
    Yeah you don't buy like you know it's like
  • 36:13 - 36:15
    Fucking sugar and stuff like that
    -Yeah yeah yeah
  • 36:15 - 36:16
    -I just it's literally peanuts and oil
    -That's what-
  • 36:16 - 36:19
    Yeah, smart, that's what you should do
    absolutely
  • 36:19 - 36:22
    But sometimes you open those and it's
    like - UGH - so much oil
  • 36:22 - 36:23
    I have to say
  • 36:23 - 36:25
    You ever do almond butter?
  • 36:25 - 36:26
    Um, no
  • 36:26 - 36:29
    Bro.... impossible to spread-
    it's quicksand!!
  • 36:30 - 36:30
    Is it really?
  • 36:30 - 36:32
    Dude literally almond butter is
    quicksand
  • 36:32 - 36:35
    Is it like oobleck when people mix it
    together like- fucking like
  • 36:35 - 36:36
    corn starch and water?
    -NO!
  • 36:36 - 36:38
    And like you hold it here and it's a ball
    and then you let go
  • 36:38 - 36:39
    And it just fucking melts
  • 36:39 - 36:40
    I used to love that
  • 36:40 - 36:41
    I-I, me too
  • 36:41 - 36:46
    Um, no, it's like just fucking
    it's, it's, it should be less
  • 36:46 - 36:48
    like less- That is a solid basically
  • 36:48 - 36:49
    Really?
  • 36:49 - 36:50
    Yeah I don't, I'm not crazy about it
  • 36:50 - 36:51
    I didn't know that alright
  • 36:51 - 36:53
    Or maybe the one that I got I don't know
  • 36:53 - 36:55
    Yeah I can't do it I can't do like
    the alternatives like
  • 36:55 - 36:57
    You ever have Ezekiel bread (?)
  • 36:58 - 37:00
    I'm not eating bread from the Bible
    so fucking no
  • 37:00 - 37:05
    Dude, Ezekiel bread is like what
    I imagine a mummy tastes like
  • 37:05 - 37:08
    Bro my mom once she was like
    I'm gonna bring you this really delicious
  • 37:08 - 37:12
    sprouted bread. And I was just like "Mom
    I'm going to secede from the family"
  • 37:12 - 37:14
    (Laughter)
  • 37:14 - 37:17
    Don't you fucking ever give me any
    disgusting bread that basically
  • 37:17 - 37:18
    is like chewing sand
  • 37:18 - 37:20
    Dude I took yeah that's what happened
    it's like
  • 37:20 - 37:23
    I took the bread out of the packaging
  • 37:23 - 37:24
    Shit everywhere
  • 37:24 - 37:25
    Yeah I can't do that
  • 37:25 - 37:26
    There's like seeds and beads
    -Listen
  • 37:26 - 37:27
    And fucking I'm like dust
  • 37:27 - 37:28
    -What is this shit?
    -The soup-Imma
  • 37:28 - 37:31
    It's bread is bread it's not good for you
    because it's bread
  • 37:31 - 37:34
    But there's, there's, there's a tier
    to breads
  • 37:35 - 37:36
    -Ok
    -Yeah
  • 37:37 - 37:38
    Sour dough is up there
  • 37:39 - 37:40
    Hell yeah
  • 37:40 - 37:42
    Italian, seeded italian
  • 37:43 - 37:45
    MMMM
    -Like a fat hard crunchy loaf?
  • 37:45 - 37:47
    That you break open and it's just
    warm and wet
  • 37:47 - 37:49
    ye-Yeaaaah
  • 37:49 - 37:51
    I would rather not seeds but I'm
    with you
  • 37:52 - 37:53
    See, ok fine
  • 37:54 - 37:56
    White bread classic
  • 37:57 - 37:59
    I haven't had white bread in a while
  • 37:59 - 38:00
    I love white bread
  • 38:00 - 38:01
    Like wonder bread?
  • 38:01 - 38:03
    No but like wonder bread is
    high fructose corn syrup in it
  • 38:03 - 38:05
    So you don't wanna , you don't wanna
    mess with it
  • 38:05 - 38:06
    I know but that's good bread
  • 38:06 - 38:08
    Uh-Yeah but it's because you're
    drinking high fructose corn syrup
  • 38:09 - 38:09
    (Mocking noises)
  • 38:10 - 38:10
    You don't want that
  • 38:10 - 38:12
    You want like-You want like
    good white bread
  • 38:12 - 38:13
    What's good white bread?
  • 38:13 - 38:15
    Like country style white bread that
    you can get from like
  • 38:15 - 38:16
    a decent farmer's market
  • 38:17 - 38:19
    White bread that has no problem
    with whole wheat bread
  • 38:19 - 38:22
    Well we want white bread that's
    going to be just like
  • 38:22 - 38:24
    It accepts all other types
    -All the other breads
  • 38:24 - 38:26
    If-If you putted it in the pantry And-
  • 38:26 - 38:28
    It doesn't think it's better than anyone else
    -It's not
  • 38:28 - 38:29
    It's not on a higher shelf
  • 38:30 - 38:31
    They all share the same shelf
  • 38:31 - 38:32
    Exactly
  • 38:32 - 38:33
    All bread is welcome
    -Right
  • 38:33 - 38:36
    Doesn't collapse under the pressure
    of other breads being held up
  • 38:36 - 38:39
    There is, there is some breads though
    that will say
  • 38:39 - 38:41
    That think they are the superior
    bread
  • 38:41 - 38:42
    Like Texas Toast!
  • 38:44 - 38:46
    Ohhh God that's bad though
    (Laughing)
  • 38:48 - 38:50
    Damn I haven't had Texas Toast
    in a while
  • 38:50 - 38:51
    Nah Texas toast grilled cheese
  • 38:51 - 38:53
    where you're basically biting into
    a whole loaf?
  • 38:53 - 38:55
    Yeah you're eating a cake!
    (Chuckling)
  • 38:55 - 38:56
    I'm fucking fine with it
  • 38:56 - 39:00
    Texas toast bro it's like
    fucking a fat fucker like this
  • 39:00 - 39:01
    Yeah, yeah baby
  • 39:01 - 39:03
    And then you put like a bunch of cheese
    on it, maybe some ham?
  • 39:04 - 39:05
    I had- I had - I had-
  • 39:05 - 39:06
    You put ham in your grilled cheese
  • 39:06 - 39:07
    Nooo, because no
  • 39:08 - 39:11
    I've had Texas Toast stuffed French Toast
  • 39:11 - 39:12
    Holy shit!
  • 39:12 - 39:13
    You ready for what it was stuffed with?
  • 39:14 - 39:14
    Tell me
  • 39:14 - 39:15
    Cream cheese
  • 39:15 - 39:15
    What?
  • 39:15 - 39:16
    Watch this
  • 39:16 - 39:18
    Nutella, one more time...
  • 39:19 - 39:20
    Frosted Flakes
  • 39:21 - 39:22
    Frankie....
  • 39:22 - 39:23
    That's why I look like this
  • 39:24 - 39:25
    (Laughing)
  • 39:25 - 39:27
    How do you say no to that?
  • 39:27 - 39:28
    That sounds ridiculous
    -It was
  • 39:28 - 39:30
    Where did you get that? Were you at a
    birthday party or something?
  • 39:30 - 39:32
    (Laughing) you're like a clown show?
  • 39:32 - 39:34
    (laughing) were you like Chuck E Cheese
  • 39:34 - 39:36
    Where did you get this thing?
  • 39:37 - 39:37
    Diary queen?
  • 39:38 - 39:41
    It's actually at a hotel in Los Angeles
    when I got it
  • 39:42 - 39:44
    You ate that in a hotel?
  • 39:44 - 39:46
    They had like a breakfast restaurant
  • 39:47 - 39:48
    (Laughing) You were in Vegas
  • 39:49 - 39:50
    Yeah! Nono LA, L.A.
  • 39:50 - 39:53
    Oh L.A. I thought you were in Vegas
  • 39:53 - 39:55
    Bro if I was in Vegas you best believe
  • 39:55 - 39:56
    I'm crushing some French Toast
  • 39:56 - 39:58
    That's the exact cure you need after
  • 39:58 - 40:00
    Drinking from 10 AM to 4 PM
  • 40:00 - 40:02
    I went to the buffet once when
    I was in Vegas
  • 40:03 - 40:05
    The amount of eggs I ate was alarming
  • 40:05 - 40:08
    What are buffet eggs?
    Because they're not eggs
  • 40:08 - 40:09
    I don't know
  • 40:09 - 40:10
    (chuckling) They are not-
    -I'll tell you this
  • 40:10 - 40:13
    I hate a whole fucking like
    -I did too!
  • 40:13 - 40:15
    A full square foot of them
  • 40:15 - 40:19
    I kid you not, for some reason they were
    giving them away
  • 40:19 - 40:21
    By the fucking square foot
    -Yeah
  • 40:21 - 40:24
    They'd be like here's a fucking cubic
    foot of eggs and I was like
  • 40:24 - 40:25
    "Woah"
  • 40:25 - 40:27
    It's like Jesus this is like fucking
    I'm picking out carpet
  • 40:27 - 40:28
    They're good....
  • 40:29 - 40:31
    ....But bad at the same time
  • 40:31 - 40:31
    -You know what I'm saying?
    -Yeah
  • 40:32 - 40:34
    Also here's I'm gonna ask you a real
    question
  • 40:34 - 40:37
    You go to a nice hotel
    -yeah
  • 40:37 - 40:39
    They have a continental breakfast
  • 40:40 - 40:42
    Doesn't the cereal taste better from there?
  • 40:43 - 40:46
    Like in those little packets?
  • 40:46 - 40:47
    Oh like in the little boxes?
  • 40:47 - 40:49
    In the little- not just the little boxes
    but like
  • 40:49 - 40:51
    in the little like plastic ones that have
    the paper on top?
  • 40:52 - 40:54
    Doesn't it just taste better in there?
  • 40:54 - 40:57
    It's It's not that It's the fucking
    cold milk
  • 40:57 - 40:58
    OHHHHHHHH
  • 40:58 - 41:00
    I love cold milk
  • 41:00 - 41:02
    Bro, cold home milk-you can't
    replace it
  • 41:02 - 41:04
    DON'T DON'T- Don't with your fucking
    -I'm not
  • 41:04 - 41:07
    High-horse go I'm just ours is just
    as good (clap)
  • 41:07 - 41:08
    If not better!
  • 41:08 - 41:09
    It's not, you know it!
  • 41:09 - 41:12
    The only thing that sucks about almond milk
    and maybe this does happen but idk
  • 41:12 - 41:13
    It's almond milk
  • 41:13 - 41:14
    Nonono, it's good
  • 41:15 - 41:17
    Like regular milk?
  • 41:17 - 41:20
    When it's so cold and then you poor it in
  • 41:20 - 41:22
    And sometimes you get little ice flakes!
  • 41:23 - 41:26
    Um... that's just called frozen milk
    (Chuckles nervously)
  • 41:26 - 41:30
    I know but sometimes the flakes come out
    and like it's really cold today!
  • 41:30 - 41:32
    (Laughing) I fucking love it bro
  • 41:32 - 41:35
    Like sometimes I'll have like Cheerios
    or something - Honey Nut
  • 41:35 - 41:37
    And then I'm pouring
    -Oh god
  • 41:37 - 41:39
    Honey Nut Cheerios is a good cereal
    don't even fucking get me started here
  • 41:39 - 41:42
    It is good but like what are you
    trying to do like not have a heart attack?
  • 41:42 - 41:44
    (Laughing)
  • 41:44 - 41:46
    It's not good for you're cholesterol
    -Yes it is!
  • 41:46 - 41:48
    The regular ones that taste like you're
    eating the box
  • 41:48 - 41:50
    Honey Nut Cheerios is good for cholesterol
  • 41:50 - 41:51
    I jus bought it the other day because
  • 41:51 - 41:53
    I was told my LDL's are high
  • 41:54 - 41:58
    (Chuckles) You think you're gonna change
    your life with Honey Nut
  • 41:58 - 42:00
    Bunch of- Three boxes of Cheerios
  • 42:00 - 42:01
    (Laughing) 3 boxes?
  • 42:02 - 42:05
    You're gonna be the spokesman
    you're gonna be in the bee costume
  • 42:05 - 42:06
    going like "I saved my life"
  • 42:06 - 42:10
    I bought 3 boxes of Cheerios I bought
    Fruity, the Berry ones
  • 42:10 - 42:12
    The apple cinnamon, Woah
  • 42:12 - 42:14
    Those are MMM no don't buy that!
  • 42:14 - 42:16
    Whoah
    -Get the apple jacks!
  • 42:16 - 42:19
    And (Stammers) Apple Jacks is not gonna
    help me live!
  • 42:19 - 42:21
    None of them are gonna Frank
  • 42:21 - 42:22
    None of them are gonna
  • 42:23 - 42:24
    Just oatmeal baby
  • 42:24 - 42:26
    I can't do oats,
    -Just do it!
  • 42:26 - 42:28
    Literally Becca made a thing
    of oats the other day
  • 42:28 - 42:30
    And I stared at it and I started to gag
  • 42:30 - 42:32
    Did I tell you- Dietary fiber
  • 42:32 - 42:35
    Well you could like replace it with other stuff
  • 42:35 - 42:38
    Like apples are high dietary fiber I've
    been eating apples a lot
  • 42:38 - 42:38
    Dates
  • 42:38 - 42:39
    I love dates!
  • 42:39 - 42:40
    Chia seeds
  • 42:40 - 42:41
    I don't care for those
  • 42:41 - 42:43
    Well just put em in a smooth ya don't
    even know they're there
  • 42:43 - 42:45
    Watch this- I still hate them
  • 42:45 - 42:46
    (laughs) "Watch this"
  • 42:46 - 42:48
    Don't care for them
  • 42:48 - 42:49
    But I love cold milk
  • 42:50 - 42:50
    Cold milk is good
  • 42:51 - 42:52
    My dad told me a story---
  • 42:53 - 42:53
    I don't care!
  • 42:54 - 42:56
    (Laughing)
  • 42:56 - 42:57
    (Laughing) No my dad
  • 42:57 - 42:59
    Told me a story that when he was in
    high school
  • 42:59 - 43:03
    And they had football camp, the kids
    like
  • 43:03 - 43:05
    You would have camp or whatever
    -Oh no
  • 43:05 - 43:07
    And then for a water break
    -Ohhhh nooo
  • 43:07 - 43:11
    You would go over and it was like
    they had a big thing of water
  • 43:11 - 43:16
    But they also had a huge steel thing
    of ice cold milk
  • 43:16 - 43:18
    Yeah but no, you know what I'm saying?
  • 43:19 - 43:20
    But like- OHHH
  • 43:20 - 43:21
    And I was like at the moment he told me
    that
  • 43:21 - 43:23
    "You're literally disgusting"
  • 43:23 - 43:25
    You know how much of a try hard
    you need to be to be like
  • 43:25 - 43:30
    I'm not gonna drink water in practice,
    Coach! Give me a fucking milk
  • 43:30 - 43:33
    They were giving out milk like fucking
    crazy---Well that's---STRONG BONES
  • 43:33 - 43:34
    Remember when they sold us that?
  • 43:34 - 43:37
    Big Milk was telling us it's like
    yo you have this you're gonna be
  • 43:37 - 43:38
    like good for life
    -yeah
  • 43:38 - 43:39
    You're not gonna be in----
    -BIG MILK MUSTACHE
  • 43:39 - 43:42
    Big Milk Mustache was a big-
    Stone cold had a Big Milk Mustache
  • 43:42 - 43:44
    Damn I miss milk
  • 43:44 - 43:45
    Just come back!
  • 43:46 - 43:49
    You're one of those freaks that buys
    the boxed, fucking, almond milk
  • 43:50 - 43:52
    Which I can't, I can't support
    -Yeah
  • 43:53 - 43:56
    But I don't really have milk like that
    -I don't either
  • 43:56 - 43:57
    I could just use it for smoothies that's
    it
  • 43:58 - 43:59
    I don't either, we have it in the house a
    lot
  • 43:59 - 44:02
    Because you know the kids take bottles
    and like eat cereal and stuff like that
  • 44:02 - 44:04
    But... I can't... like...
  • 44:04 - 44:07
    Just eat milk (chuckles) Eat milk?
  • 44:07 - 44:09
    I know I can drink I can definitely
    crush milk
  • 44:09 - 44:12
    Oh dude you know I used to come back
    from the park from when we were younger
  • 44:12 - 44:15
    And I would just go over and grab a
    gallon of milk and just start
  • 44:15 - 44:16
    chugging it out of the gallon
  • 44:16 - 44:19
    Oh were you one of those idiots that
    opened the fridge and grabbed
  • 44:19 - 44:22
    the milk gallon or like the carton
    of fucking orange juice
  • 44:22 - 44:22
    and drank out of it?
  • 44:23 - 44:23
    Yep
  • 44:24 - 44:25
    That's why you are the way you are
  • 44:26 - 44:27
    I used to do that all the time
  • 44:27 - 44:29
    My mom would be livid
  • 44:29 - 44:31
    You watched way too many like
    Mighty Ducks and
  • 44:31 - 44:33
    Fucking movies in the 90's
  • 44:33 - 44:34
    Cause that's all they did
  • 44:34 - 44:36
    They'd get home and they'd just
    fucking swing it open
  • 44:36 - 44:38
    Just grab milk and chug it
    -Yeah
  • 44:38 - 44:39
    I hate that
  • 44:39 - 44:39
    Can't do it
  • 44:40 - 44:41
    1 time my mom went to go
    grab it out of my hands
  • 44:41 - 44:42
    Cause I was chugging the milk
  • 44:42 - 44:43
    She's like "What are you"---
  • 44:43 - 44:44
    And then I dropped it
  • 44:44 - 44:45
    Fucking milk everywhere
  • 44:45 - 44:45
    Her fault!
  • 44:46 - 44:47
    Yeah I know I blamed her
    ---You gaslit her
  • 44:48 - 44:49
    I did I said look what you've done
  • 44:49 - 44:52
    Look what you've done you and our
    dumb ass dog Charlie!
  • 44:53 - 44:54
    He didn't exist
  • 44:54 - 44:56
    Oh that's right at the time but like
  • 44:56 - 45:00
    You were saying like I'm gonna blame
    someone else for me fucking up
  • 45:00 - 45:02
    And you know 15 years or something
    Mom
  • 45:02 - 45:05
    Yeah... and that's kind of what happened
  • 45:05 - 45:07
    Peanut Butter - Liquid
  • 45:08 - 45:10
    It's a spread
  • 45:10 - 45:12
    I don't- Yes it's a spread but liquids can
    be spreads!
  • 45:13 - 45:13
    It's a gray area
  • 45:14 - 45:15
    It's so is butter a liquid?
  • 45:16 - 45:17
    No
  • 45:17 - 45:19
    Butter is a - It's just a hard
  • 45:19 - 45:20
    It can be though
  • 45:20 - 45:21
    It's just a it's a harder liquid
  • 45:22 - 45:23
    Yeah
  • 45:24 - 45:25
    Ok
  • 45:26 - 45:29
    Solved - ok we have- we have more
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  • 45:29 - 45:32
    The first one being Stamps.com
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    Stamps.com all you need is a computer
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    the basically the entire post office
    at your finger tips
  • 45:39 - 45:41
    I was gonna say your fingernails
    (Chuckling)
  • 45:41 - 45:44
    Well those are at the tips
    That is true
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    But with Stamps.com
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    You can not only save time
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    Or like you know whatever
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    You're also saving money
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    They have huge carrier discounts
    up to 84% off USPS and UPS rates
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    Plus Stamps.com automatically tells you
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    Um so it is great to if you have a small
    business or something like
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    This is what you're gonna wanna be using
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    I know a lot of people who use Stamps.com
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    And I've had them all sign up with our
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    But yeah! So sign up with the promo code
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    that includes a four week trial
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    which is good. Uh just go to Stamps.com
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    Click on the microphone at the top
    of the page
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    And enter the code BASEMENT alright?
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    So again that is Stamps.com
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    Click on the microphone at the top of the
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    And enter the code BASEMENT
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    And you'll get that 4 week trial
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    Alright so go check out Stamps.com
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    And we also have Simply Safe here
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    And backed by 24/7 professional monitoring
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    It is a home security system
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    Very easy to set up
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    It only costs It's like under a dollar
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    That's how much it costs
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    And it's gonna keep your home
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    24/7 professional monitoring
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    You can lock your- you can lock
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    Access your cameras
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    And arm or disarm your system
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    But it's great and in an emergency
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    So it's nice to know that someone's
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    And you can customize the perfect system
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    There's no safe like Simply Safe
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    And lastly here we have
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    They have both branded and artistic
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    They have over 1 million designs
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    They're like a one of a kind metal
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    For your wall
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    only takes 20 seconds
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    There's no need for drilling in your walls
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    And they deliver their products worldwide
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    In only 4-5 business days
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    It's a perfect alternative for standard
    paper posters that often get damaged
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    And it doesn't leave marks on the wall
    which is a huge thing also
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    And I like convenience to be able to just
    Boom put it up there
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    I love- they also have a lot of cool stuff
    on their site, so if you go on their site
  • 48:21 - 48:23
    I like the ones that's like of animals
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    They have really nice ones of animals
    and like foxes and stuff
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    That's one of my favorite animals
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    You can use the link in the description
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    Or go to Displate.com/BASEMENTYARD
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    And use the code BASEMENT at checkout
    to get 22% off for 1-2 Displates
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    Or 33% off for 3 or more
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    Again the code is --
    I mean the site is
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    Displate
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    .com/BASEMENTYARD
  • 48:50 - 48:52
    And use the promo code BASEMENT
    at checkout
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    Ok? So there you go folks
  • 48:54 - 48:56
    Our next sponsor is Etsy
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    Etsy is great I love shopping on Etsy
  • 48:59 - 49:01
    Especially when the holidays come round
    and for birthdays
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    It's always the first website I go to
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    When looking for gifts for other
    people
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    Or something that I just want
    in my apartment as well
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    There is beautiful items that are made
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    on this website. And there's a bunch
    of things that you can buy
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    Jewelry, furniture, art, and more
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    For all budgets any occasion
    Like I said
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    Usually when occasion rolls around
    if it's ya know Valentines Day
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    Or it's Christmas or someone's
    birthday I will go on Etsy
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    And see what's out there
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    There's wonderful things
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    I know I've bought a wallet for
    one of my friends
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    That was made out of like
    a baseball jersey on this site
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    from an independent seller there
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    So really cool items you can get
    really cool gift-side
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    Gift ideas
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    And if you're NEW to Etsy you can use
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    For home style and gifts
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    Shop Etsy.com
    Etsy has it
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    Again use the code NEW
    for 10% off your first purchase
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    If you're a new Etsy shopper
  • 50:06 - 50:10
    And I guess to sort of
    wrap up
  • 50:10 - 50:12
    Well you gotta end with a bang
  • 50:12 - 50:13
    With a bang
  • 50:13 - 50:14
    (Stammering) To end with a
  • 50:14 - 50:18
    (God tier rap)
  • 50:18 - 50:21
    Is that what it is?
    Those are the lyrics
  • 50:21 - 50:22
    That's one of them
  • 50:22 - 50:23
    Kid Rock
  • 50:23 - 50:25
    Our boy!
    Back in the goose!
  • 50:25 - 50:26
    Your boy actually
  • 50:26 - 50:26
    Your boy
    -No
  • 50:27 - 50:28
    You and him you said like
  • 50:28 - 50:29
    If I'm ever gonna go to Detroit
  • 50:29 - 50:33
    I know exactly why and it's
    Kid Rock guy (Laughs)
  • 50:33 - 50:35
    Kid Rock back in the news
  • 50:35 - 50:37
    Guy is super pissed that
    -He's upset
  • 50:38 - 50:40
    Bud Light came out
  • 50:40 - 50:42
    And Bud Light's like Jesus
    Christ to these people
  • 50:42 - 50:45
    To this people too I'm a
    Bud Light fan
  • 50:45 - 50:47
    You're a Miller Lite guy
  • 50:47 - 50:49
    I love Miller Lite I also
    Like Bud Light!
  • 50:49 - 50:52
    I have no quarrels with
    either I'm all for all beer
  • 50:52 - 50:54
    I'm......
    -Except for non-alcoholic
  • 50:55 - 50:55
    Shut up!
  • 50:56 - 50:58
    (Chuckles)
    I need it in a bottle though
  • 50:58 - 50:59
    Oh you could do a bottle!
  • 50:59 - 51:01
    You could do cans the aluminum
    bottle cans though
  • 51:01 - 51:03
    I hate th-those are my least favorite
  • 51:03 - 51:04
    Really? I'm kind of
    -Yeaaaah
  • 51:04 - 51:06
    about them
    -Aluminum bottle?
  • 51:06 - 51:07
    Yeah well-
    -Like at a baseball game?
  • 51:07 - 51:08
    I don't like it
  • 51:08 - 51:11
    Well I don't like the fact it's 40
    dollars for a beer at a baseball game
  • 51:11 - 51:12
    Well that's a different story
  • 51:12 - 51:13
    You know....
  • 51:14 - 51:15
    But yeah so Kid Rock....
  • 51:16 - 51:18
    He recently was in the news because
  • 51:19 - 51:24
    Bud Light they partnered with a
    trans influencer
  • 51:24 - 51:26
    Trans or drag? I don't know
  • 51:26 - 51:27
    Trans.
  • 51:28 - 51:30
    Ok I didn't I didn't know I'm asking
  • 51:30 - 51:30
    Trans.
    -Ok
  • 51:32 - 51:34
    And.... PISSED!
  • 51:34 - 51:36
    Yeah like what?
  • 51:36 - 51:38
    It's like UGHH you're fucking WHAT?
    Supporting?
  • 51:38 - 51:41
    So he went and purchased Bud Light
  • 51:41 - 51:42
    Hysterical
  • 51:42 - 51:43
    A bunch of them
  • 51:43 - 51:44
    Like not a little!
  • 51:44 - 51:45
    4 cases?
    -Yeah
  • 51:45 - 51:49
    Like probably about a hundred and twenty
    cans - bottles
  • 51:49 - 51:53
    And then he made a video with his hat
    on backwards and it said MAGA right?
  • 51:53 - 51:54
    It did say it absolutely said MAGA
  • 51:54 - 51:58
    Can we just agree on something?
    I just wanna agree on something
  • 51:58 - 52:01
    Wherever you stand on the political
    spectrum or wherever
  • 52:02 - 52:08
    You-like how can you watch that video
    and not go this is the corniest thing!
  • 52:09 - 52:10
    I have ever seen in my life
  • 52:10 - 52:13
    It reminds me of those kids
  • 52:13 - 52:14
    -That like will
    -Would wear cut off gloves!
  • 52:14 - 52:19
    -Wear cut off gloves and take videos of
    like "This is me doing a double kick-flip
  • 52:19 - 52:21
    And then going on my way to fuck your mom"
  • 52:21 - 52:23
    Yeah and you're like bro what is this?
  • 52:23 - 52:26
    This is Monster Energy, energy here
  • 52:26 - 52:29
    Listen I am all for different forms of expression
  • 52:29 - 52:33
    I think we need to acknowledge
    that this one just sucked
  • 52:33 - 52:35
    He turns around and he's like
    I've got a message
  • 52:35 - 52:37
    LOUD AND CLEAR (kkona)
  • 52:37 - 52:37
    By the way
  • 52:37 - 52:39
    From Detroit
    -Yeah
  • 52:39 - 52:41
    Not the South
    -Right
  • 52:41 - 52:45
    And then he takes out a gun
    and he shoots a bunch of Bud Light
  • 52:46 - 52:50
    I believe it was an automatic weapon
    -It was an automatic weapon
  • 52:50 - 52:52
    It was an automatic weapon and he was just
    shooting at a Bud Light
  • 52:52 - 52:55
    And like he shot it up - Gotta say,
    good shot
  • 52:55 - 52:57
    I thought it was kind of cool
    -I don't think...
  • 52:57 - 52:59
    I would should stuff!
  • 52:59 - 53:05
    I don't think like us like little libby
    boys and girls and however we identify
  • 53:05 - 53:07
    would be able to shoot that well he
    shot pretty good
  • 53:07 - 53:08
    Dude I'm a good shot
  • 53:08 - 53:10
    I'm a good shot too don't get me wrong,
    BITCH!
  • 53:10 - 53:12
    (Laughing)
  • 53:12 - 53:15
    I'm saying like he just turned around and
    was just like on it
  • 53:15 - 53:20
    Nah I'm fucking those beers up
    (Machine gun fire noise)
  • 53:20 - 53:21
    Which the....
    -Guns are fun
  • 53:22 - 53:24
    Well- (Laughing)
  • 53:24 - 53:25
    Careful.....
  • 53:26 - 53:27
    Careful
  • 53:27 - 53:29
    In controlled environments
    -Careful
  • 53:32 - 53:33
    -Boy....
    -That's funny
  • 53:33 - 53:34
    Yeah (Chuckling)
  • 53:34 - 53:36
    Yeah Well (Laughs)
  • 53:36 - 53:38
    I think can we also say this?
  • 53:38 - 53:39
    (chuckles)
  • 53:39 - 53:44
    I, I'm with you here as well
    wherever you fall on the
  • 53:44 - 53:45
    political spectrum, go for it
  • 53:46 - 53:49
    Hats are not the best way of
    branding
  • 53:50 - 53:52
    Your political-
    -Are you kidding I feel like it worked
  • 53:53 - 53:54
    Extremely well for Donald Trump
  • 53:54 - 53:57
    Nonono- It did I'm saying I don't
    think like
  • 53:57 - 54:01
    No-one sees someone with a hat
    and goes here comes a rational person
  • 54:01 - 54:02
    They go "Awww fuck"
  • 54:02 - 54:03
    With a hat?
  • 54:03 - 54:05
    Yeah bro hat's just give off
    like
  • 54:05 - 54:06
    If you saw someone walking
  • 54:06 - 54:07
    I know, I know what I'm doing!
  • 54:08 - 54:08
    You're wearing a hat
  • 54:08 - 54:10
    I'm wearing a sports hat you're
    wearing a sports hat
  • 54:10 - 54:12
    But like if my hat said like
    "I love Jesus"
  • 54:12 - 54:14
    You're thinking like this guy SUCKS
  • 54:14 - 54:17
    (Laughing)
    Not because I love Jesus
  • 54:17 - 54:18
    Because I love him enough to wear
    a hat
  • 54:18 - 54:19
    Oh so you think
  • 54:20 - 54:24
    Hats, if it's not a brand or like a sports
    team
  • 54:24 - 54:25
    Like if you're trying to send a message
    via hat
  • 54:25 - 54:27
    -Send a message via hat? All for it
    -Yeah, yeah
  • 54:27 - 54:27
    I get it
  • 54:27 - 54:29
    All for....--
    -Or like bumper sticker?
  • 54:29 - 54:30
    Dude what are we doing
  • 54:30 - 54:33
    Bumper stickers have never made
    me go "yeaaah"
  • 54:33 - 54:35
    They've made me go "FUCK this
    person"
  • 54:35 - 54:36
    Yeah
  • 54:36 - 54:38
    And I've judged that car and
    the individual driving it
  • 54:38 - 54:39
    Well that's because like
    (Stammers)
  • 54:39 - 54:45
    Fucking uh, bumper stickers are either
    like a wild political take
  • 54:45 - 54:48
    Or it's like I fucked I just left
    fucking your mom or something
  • 54:49 - 54:49
    And it's like (bruh)
  • 54:49 - 54:52
    Or they're trying to be like super funny
    and like cute
  • 54:52 - 54:53
    You know what I'll mean
  • 54:53 - 54:56
    And it'll be like you know like
    "My children are furbabies"
  • 54:56 - 54:59
    And it's like I wanna strangle you
    so fucking hard
  • 54:59 - 55:01
    Yeaaah it's just annoying
  • 55:01 - 55:03
    I just I don't think that--
    -Or the one that says baby on board
  • 55:03 - 55:06
    but it says "Bitch on board"
    "My wife's a bitch on board"
  • 55:06 - 55:07
    Or something like that
    (Laughter)
  • 55:07 - 55:08
    You know like I don't know
  • 55:08 - 55:09
    (Laughter)
  • 55:09 - 55:10
    People that--
    -OH MY GOD!
  • 55:10 - 55:12
    I saw one recently
  • 55:12 - 55:13
    Take 2 your turn!
  • 55:13 - 55:13
    Yes
  • 55:14 - 55:16
    (Laughing) You know we talked
    about this before
  • 55:16 - 55:18
    You know how people have their
    whole family in like little
  • 55:18 - 55:18
    stick figures
  • 55:18 - 55:20
    Yeah I don't mind those
    but ok
  • 55:20 - 55:22
    You don't-You don't
  • 55:22 - 55:23
    I don't hate them
  • 55:23 - 55:23
    You don't have it?
  • 55:23 - 55:24
    I don't
  • 55:24 - 55:25
    Ok--
    But I don't hate them
  • 55:25 - 55:26
    Why don't you hate them?
  • 55:26 - 55:27
    Because I just don't
  • 55:28 - 55:28
    But why?
  • 55:29 - 55:33
    Because I have no feeling or
    desire or care about them
  • 55:33 - 55:34
    Because I'm a dad
  • 55:34 - 55:37
    But I'm forced to know how many
    people are in this family
  • 55:37 - 55:40
    Yeah, so you know when you drive
    into them recklessly
  • 55:40 - 55:41
    How many people you're potentially
    killing
  • 55:41 - 55:43
    Fair, but I saw one
  • 55:43 - 55:45
    When you use your big ol'
    fucking Range Rover
  • 55:45 - 55:47
    (Laughing)
  • 55:47 - 55:49
    You're driving like this
    "Here comes me!!"
  • 55:49 - 55:50
    I'm Joe!
  • 55:50 - 55:54
    On my way to talk to fucking
    people about podcasts
  • 55:54 - 55:56
    (chuckles) Shut the fuck up
  • 55:56 - 55:59
    But I saw one and it was just a T-rex
  • 56:00 - 56:01
    And then feet
  • 56:01 - 56:02
    Kill em.
  • 56:02 - 56:03
    I was like-
    -That's when
  • 56:03 - 56:07
    You use those, listen-
    -It's like all my family was eaten
  • 56:07 - 56:08
    by a T-Rex
    (quietly) Fuck you
  • 56:08 - 56:10
    You know what you do?
    You know what you do?
  • 56:10 - 56:11
    You pull up next to them
    -Yes
  • 56:11 - 56:13
    Confirm it's only the driver
    in the car
  • 56:14 - 56:16
    Fall back, and then kill them
  • 56:17 - 56:18
    Run them off the road-
    -Ram em?
  • 56:18 - 56:20
    Run them off the road, make sure
  • 56:20 - 56:22
    Because it yeah I've seen one that's like
  • 56:23 - 56:26
    You know it's like Luke Skywalker
    And then like fucking
  • 56:27 - 56:27
    Vader?
  • 56:27 - 56:29
    No like uh Lea
  • 56:29 - 56:31
    Which again like brother sister weird
  • 56:31 - 56:31
    Come on :/
  • 56:31 - 56:33
    And then it's like 3 Ewolks
  • 56:33 - 56:35
    And it's like this this has gotten
    too out of hand
  • 56:35 - 56:37
    Also they're not even
    they don't even end up together!
  • 56:37 - 56:38
    Spoiler alert!
  • 56:38 - 56:40
    Cause they're brother and sister
  • 56:40 - 56:41
    I know but they kiss
  • 56:41 - 56:42
    They do, very weird
  • 56:42 - 56:43
    And they knew didn't they?
  • 56:43 - 56:45
    No not at the time no-
    -EWWWW
  • 56:45 - 56:46
    She kissed him to make Han jealous
  • 56:47 - 56:49
    I know but like there's no addressing
    that in the movies?
  • 56:49 - 56:50
    I was like I'm fucking
  • 56:51 - 56:52
    I can get whoever I want
  • 56:52 - 56:54
    You know don't worry about me
  • 56:54 - 56:55
    You know he's got a hog
  • 56:55 - 56:57
    Bro. Harrison Ford?
  • 56:58 - 56:59
    Guy's carrying around a shaft.
  • 56:59 - 57:01
    And he also is a good looking old man.
  • 57:01 - 57:04
    He is he is he's got that one earing thing
    going on
  • 57:04 - 57:05
    Does he??
  • 57:05 - 57:05
    He's got earrings
  • 57:05 - 57:07
    I hope that one day I can do that
  • 57:07 - 57:09
    He doesn't give a fuck
  • 57:09 - 57:12
    I hope that one day I can pull off
    like an old man dangly earring
  • 57:12 - 57:13
    I want a dangly earring
  • 57:13 - 57:15
    I brought it up and Becca
    -Like Barry Bonds
  • 57:15 - 57:16
    Becca instantly -
  • 57:16 - 57:17
    Bro well you need to do a couple things
    to be Barry Bonds
  • 57:18 - 57:18
    Steroids
  • 57:18 - 57:20
    Backwards Baseball Jersey
  • 57:20 - 57:22
    Backwards Baseball Cap
  • 57:22 - 57:23
    Dangly Earring
  • 57:24 - 57:25
    That'd be fire
  • 57:25 - 57:26
    You could do it
  • 57:26 - 57:27
    A backwards jersey
  • 57:28 - 57:29
    No, regular baseball jersey
  • 57:30 - 57:31
    You just said backwards jersey
  • 57:31 - 57:32
    I am, then I misspoke I apologize
  • 57:32 - 57:34
    I was like Jesus what fucking year
    is this?
  • 57:34 - 57:35
    That's Barry Bonds!
  • 57:35 - 57:37
    Giants jersey, backwards hat
  • 57:37 - 57:42
    And just a fucking taken BP with a single
    fucking earing?
  • 57:42 - 57:44
    With a bat that looks like it's this long
  • 57:44 - 57:46
    Yeaaaah, yeah absolutely
  • 57:47 - 57:48
    Damn that's fucking cool as fuck
  • 57:48 - 57:49
    I gotta say
  • 57:51 - 57:51
    Kid Rock
  • 57:53 - 57:54
    Strange way of getting his message
    out there
  • 57:54 - 57:57
    I think obviously it lands with certain people
  • 57:57 - 57:59
    But hey man ummm
  • 57:59 - 58:04
    Do you??? Bud Light has always supported
    to my understanding
  • 58:04 - 58:07
    people in the LGBTQIA+ community
  • 58:07 - 58:09
    So why, like what now? Why
    are you getting upset now?
  • 58:09 - 58:11
    Um I don't know
  • 58:11 - 58:14
    I've seen people make videos like
    I'm switching to Coors (kkona)
  • 58:14 - 58:17
    Like Coors is like nah we're also
    like supportive of gay stuff
  • 58:17 - 58:21
    Yeah, Coors is like, We're from
    Colorado
  • 58:21 - 58:22
    What do you think happens here?
  • 58:22 - 58:23
    (LAUGHTER)
  • 58:23 - 58:25
    One of the most liberal fucking
    places
  • 58:26 - 58:31
    I just I guess I don't understand
    what he was
  • 58:31 - 58:34
    Dude there's such a thing in the
    market right now
  • 58:34 - 58:36
    We need to make a straight Christian
  • 58:36 - 58:38
    fucking YEAH-AH beer! (kkona)
  • 58:38 - 58:41
    Which is hysterical because
    Christians are just like no alcohol.
  • 58:41 - 58:48
    They need to make like a drink that's like
    a straight beer
  • 58:49 - 58:52
    Like a what's super straight?
  • 58:52 - 58:54
    Fucking, like---
    --Eagle tits!
  • 58:54 - 58:56
    Yeah (Laughing)
  • 58:56 - 58:58
    Bald Eagle Tits (laughing)
  • 58:58 - 58:59
    And that's the name of the beer
  • 58:59 - 59:00
    You know how you go to Target?
  • 59:00 - 59:04
    And it'll be like the women's soap sec-
    like area
  • 59:04 - 59:07
    And it'll be like milk and honey and
    osimanthius
  • 59:07 - 59:09
    and fucking stuff like that
  • 59:09 - 59:10
    And you go to the guys
  • 59:10 - 59:15
    And it's like fucking bars and it's like
    BEER! WHISKEY! OPPRESSION!
  • 59:15 - 59:17
    That's what it smells like!
    -Yeah
  • 59:17 - 59:19
    SAWDUST!
    -Yeahhaha
  • 59:19 - 59:20
    It's like why do you want to smell
    like that?
  • 59:21 - 59:23
    This one has actual pieces of saw dust
    in it!
  • 59:23 - 59:27
    Yeah yeah yeah it's like buy our fucking
    soap in here are rocks from actual
  • 59:27 - 59:29
    Pompeii victims
  • 59:29 - 59:29
    And it's like bro
  • 59:30 - 59:33
    Actually there is there is a comedian
  • 59:33 - 59:34
    His name is Eric Dawlson
  • 59:35 - 59:38
    And he had like a funny video
    that he put on his Instagram
  • 59:38 - 59:41
    Talking about this where it's like
    they have to trick men into
  • 59:41 - 59:43
    washing themselves so it's like
  • 59:43 - 59:45
    MOUNTAIN MAIN SOAP!
    (Chuckles)
  • 59:45 - 59:47
    And it's like Look! it's cool it's
    for boys
  • 59:47 - 59:50
    Yeah you go through and there's
    one I remember seeing
  • 59:50 - 59:52
    It just says on the bottle it says,
    "THICK"
  • 59:52 - 59:54
    And I was like (Laughter) huh?
  • 59:54 - 59:55
    That's enough to get the guys
  • 59:56 - 59:58
    It's like that's how stupid men are
  • 59:58 - 59:58
    Listen
  • 59:59 - 60:00
    I
  • 60:01 - 60:01
    It's beer
  • 60:02 - 60:03
    Like what's the idea
  • 60:03 - 60:05
    If you're allowing people to
  • 60:06 - 60:09
    Support eac- Like isn't this the idea
    of like going against the first amendment?
  • 60:09 - 60:13
    They're using their voice to support
    someone in a marginalized community.
  • 60:13 - 60:14
    Like, let them fucking Why are you
  • 60:14 - 60:16
    Like if you're getting fucking upset about it
  • 60:16 - 60:19
    I think that says a little bit, a little
    tiny bit more about you
  • 60:19 - 60:25
    I mean, I think it's hysterical, that like
    people can have the time to get worked up
  • 60:25 - 60:27
    Like what are we doing?
  • 60:27 - 60:30
    Can you set up a little table with your
    beer on it
  • 60:30 - 60:32
    -Wait until they fight
    -Record a cool little video!
  • 60:32 - 60:34
    Yeah (Laughing)
    -It's like YO come on!
  • 60:34 - 60:35
    It's like wait a sec!
  • 60:36 - 60:39
    RED (Laughter)
  • 60:39 - 60:40
    You know
  • 60:40 - 60:41
    You set up your little art project
  • 60:41 - 60:43
    you're like I'm gonna shoot it
  • 60:43 - 60:44
    Yeah you know-
    -(Machine gun noises)
  • 60:44 - 60:46
    And listen, Kid Rock, first of all
  • 60:47 - 60:48
    Take it easy, ok?
  • 60:48 - 60:49
    Cowboy's a good song though
  • 60:49 - 60:50
    Uhhhh, is it?
  • 60:51 - 60:53
    1975 which one was that one?
    -What?
  • 60:53 - 60:55
    All Summer Long!
  • 60:55 - 60:55
    That's a slap!
  • 60:56 - 60:57
    It is a slap
  • 60:57 - 60:59
    Apparently an anti-gay slap
  • 60:59 - 61:00
    Yeah (laughing) But
  • 61:01 - 61:04
    Just slap the gays right in the face
    with that one
  • 61:04 - 61:07
    Now that I think about it in that song
    he never talks about like kissing bros
  • 61:07 - 61:09
    or jerking off his homies you know?
  • 61:09 - 61:10
    Yeah obviously
  • 61:10 - 61:12
    Well.... I've listened to it better
  • 61:12 - 61:14
    Now you see it in a different light
  • 61:14 - 61:16
    Well no I don't
  • 61:16 - 61:18
    We were smoking funny things
  • 61:18 - 61:20
    Oh, smoking penises
  • 61:20 - 61:20
    Penises (giggles)
  • 61:23 - 61:26
    He's gonna be so mad when he
    sees this (laughter)
  • 61:26 - 61:27
    Yeah
  • 61:27 - 61:28
    Kid Rock!
  • 61:28 - 61:29
    Listen dude
  • 61:29 - 61:30
    I love
  • 61:31 - 61:32
    Bob with the Bar!
  • 61:32 - 61:34
    I love 3 of your songs man
    (chuckles)
  • 61:34 - 61:37
    I love Bob with the Bar, All Summer Long
    and--
  • 61:37 - 61:41
    But I will say dude honestly if you're
    watching this (laughter)
  • 61:41 - 61:44
    I-I get it bro! If you don't
  • 61:44 - 61:47
    If you think it's whatever you don't
    have to drink the beer anymore
  • 61:47 - 61:49
    I think, I personally think it's stupid
  • 61:49 - 61:50
    But like you don't have to
  • 61:50 - 61:53
    But, making this video just-
  • 61:53 - 61:55
    It didn't do what-
    -It's not cool
  • 61:55 - 61:56
    It didn't do what you think it did
  • 61:57 - 61:57
    It really didn't
    -What
  • 61:57 - 62:01
    are you Mr. Rock, if I may
    (Laughter)
  • 62:01 - 62:05
    What are you think - So there are
    gay establishments
  • 62:05 - 62:09
    Bars, clubs. What do you think they
    serve there?
  • 62:09 - 62:10
    Probably cock
  • 62:11 - 62:14
    Well they're slaying it and servicing it
  • 62:14 - 62:16
    They're serving and serving you know?
  • 62:16 - 62:17
    Bud Light
  • 62:17 - 62:20
    But like wait until he finds out
  • 62:20 - 62:23
    What does he think like, there's a guy
    just dragging his dick across the top
  • 62:23 - 62:25
    of all the Bud Lights in the fucking
    assembly line?
  • 62:25 - 62:28
    I'm sure his opniion is
  • 62:28 - 62:32
    You know, they're supporting someone
    who is trying to basically
  • 62:32 - 62:33
    brainwash today's youth
  • 62:33 - 62:34
    Ohhhh
  • 62:34 - 62:37
    And fucking- I'm sure that's what the
    typical argument is
  • 62:37 - 62:40
    Where.... AHHH I don't think so
  • 62:40 - 62:42
    I absolutely do not
  • 62:42 - 62:45
    One thing I do wanna say, which I do
    think this could be the most important
  • 62:45 - 62:49
    thing that we get from this uh, video
  • 62:49 - 62:50
    Is that...
  • 62:51 - 62:53
    Like on a very serious note
  • 62:53 - 62:58
    He-like- Kid Rock looks like an old dog
  • 62:58 - 63:01
    (Laughter) He does!
  • 63:01 - 63:05
    Doesn't he look like a dog - the ones with
    the flappy ears?
  • 63:05 - 63:07
    He does oh my like droopy!
  • 63:07 - 63:08
    But it looks like he hides them in his
    hat!
  • 63:09 - 63:10
    Like a blood hound, he does!
  • 63:10 - 63:12
    But if he took his hat off I think that
    he would just have these long
  • 63:12 - 63:14
    dog ears.
    -Maybe that's why maybe he is
  • 63:14 - 63:18
    secretly a dog. Maybe Bob with the Bar
    is a song for dogs and he wrote it as
  • 63:18 - 63:20
    a dog. And if you play it backwards
  • 63:20 - 63:22
    No if you play it to like a dog they're
    like
  • 63:23 - 63:25
    They know what's going on
    -Bob with the Bar, you know?
  • 63:25 - 63:27
    It's like dog talk
    -Yeah exactly it's exactly what it is
  • 63:27 - 63:29
    Updrop the boogie!
  • 63:29 - 63:34
    Listen, if, if people are gonna sit there
    and criticize Bud Light for being gay
  • 63:34 - 63:39
    I'll drink Bud Light. I'll suck it down
    I don't care (Laughing)
  • 63:39 - 63:40
    I'm all about it!
  • 63:40 - 63:41
    What's the straightest beer now?
  • 63:42 - 63:43
    If we don't wanna drink gay
  • 63:43 - 63:45
    Bud Heavy-Oh but they're they're
    the dudes!
  • 63:45 - 63:47
    Oh Bud Heavy made? Oh no.
  • 63:47 - 63:50
    But well Bud Light and Bud, it's all in
    Heizer Bush!
  • 63:50 - 63:53
    Yeah well, he said fuck and Heizer bush
    too
  • 63:53 - 63:55
    Yeah he went after the whole crew!
    -The whole Bush!
  • 63:55 - 63:57
    He went fucking hit 'em up style!
  • 63:57 - 64:00
    (chuckling) Fuck Mama petite
    Fuck Biggie!
  • 64:00 - 64:03
    Fuck bad boy as a record label
  • 64:03 - 64:04
    Like he went after everybody
  • 64:04 - 64:07
    Uh, so I guess if not in house
  • 64:07 - 64:09
    So who's on the other side of Bud Light?
  • 64:09 - 64:10
    Coors?
    -Coors.
  • 64:10 - 64:11
    Are they, like?
  • 64:11 - 64:12
    But Coors heavy is not as Amer-
    It's not like as
  • 64:12 - 64:14
    The Banquet Beer
  • 64:14 - 64:15
    It's not
  • 64:15 - 64:18
    And also Beige is like, gay
  • 64:18 - 64:19
    What?
  • 64:19 - 64:20
    The can
  • 64:20 - 64:21
    Oh, eh
  • 64:21 - 64:24
    I mean, who else is there?
  • 64:24 - 64:28
    Miller but like I'm sure Miller supports
    people in the community as well!
  • 64:28 - 64:29
    Also what are you gonna do 4th of July?
  • 64:29 - 64:31
    Bud Light makes those cool American
    flag cans
  • 64:31 - 64:33
    Yeah! What are you doing?
    -You have to drink those
  • 64:33 - 64:34
    And you have to-
  • 64:34 - 64:36
    That's really a fork in the road for him
  • 64:36 - 64:38
    That's pretty - He's gonna see this like-
    I wanna be American!
  • 64:38 - 64:41
    I wanna be American but I don't
    wanna be gay! (Laughs)
  • 64:41 - 64:45
    I hope, I hope that for this 4th of
    July Anheuser Bush leans into it
  • 64:45 - 64:49
    And instead of the American flag
    they do the fucking Pride flag
  • 64:49 - 64:52
    Or they do the exclusive cans that
    are the trans flag.
  • 64:52 - 64:54
    The bi flag, like
  • 64:54 - 64:56
    Kid Rock he's gonna turn that
  • 64:56 - 64:57
    gun on himself! (Laughter)
  • 64:57 - 64:59
    What is he gonna do?
  • 65:01 - 65:04
    He's gonna bob with the bar that banged
    himself in the fucking temple!
  • 65:04 - 65:06
    Yeah (laughs) this is gonna happen
  • 65:06 - 65:07
    Dude I can't even imagine
  • 65:07 - 65:08
    Imagine all the beer
  • 65:09 - 65:13
    All beers are like "We support"
    "We're just gonna gay it"
  • 65:13 - 65:15
    So what are- what are racist
  • 65:15 - 65:19
    Fucking, homophobic pieces of shit
    gonna drink now?
  • 65:19 - 65:21
    Wait till they find out about vodka
  • 65:21 - 65:22
    Is that gay?
  • 65:23 - 65:25
    I don't know, but apparently beer is!
  • 65:25 - 65:26
    It feels it
  • 65:27 - 65:29
    Yeah I don't know
  • 65:29 - 65:32
    Throw them, throw them Schmitz Gay
    from SNL
  • 65:33 - 65:35
    Just show them that episode like
    YEAH (kkona)
  • 65:36 - 65:37
    And then they're like Well wait a se
  • 65:37 - 65:38
    (chuckling)
  • 65:40 - 65:41
    Yeah I don't know
  • 65:41 - 65:42
    God Bless though you know?
  • 65:43 - 65:43
    America stuff?
  • 65:43 - 65:46
    What would, what would be
    what would they believe
  • 65:46 - 65:47
    What would Kid Rock call the straightest
  • 65:47 - 65:51
    Like, alcoholic drink
    like not beer like Spirit
  • 65:51 - 65:51
    Whiskey.
  • 65:52 - 65:53
    Whiskey
  • 65:53 - 65:53
    Yeah
    Yeah
  • 65:53 - 65:59
    Cause whiskey is what you drink-
    -Whiskey came from the hands of the men
    that beat the gays!
  • 65:59 - 66:01
    fucking chill man (Laughter)
  • 66:01 - 66:06
    Whiskey is one of those drinks that you
    sit on a like a nice comfy couch
  • 66:06 - 66:08
    with your boy. And you drink it neat
  • 66:09 - 66:12
    in front of a fire place-
    -Well I don't know man
  • 66:12 - 66:13
    That's a little homoerotic
  • 66:13 - 66:17
    And there's a draft coming in and it
    makes us a little chilly
  • 66:17 - 66:19
    And we have to get under a blanket (kkona)
  • 66:19 - 66:22
    When you have to look your boy in the eyes
    and say "Give it to me dirty" (Kkona)
  • 66:22 - 66:24
    (Laughter) Give it to me NEAT
  • 66:24 - 66:26
    Clean it off!
  • 66:26 - 66:29
    I'd like some rocks in my-
    -I wanna polish that bottle
  • 66:29 - 66:31
    Let's polish that bottle off!
  • 66:32 - 66:33
    Yeah
  • 66:33 - 66:34
    Like alright, ok, there you go!
  • 66:34 - 66:36
    Kid Rock, Mr. Rock
  • 66:36 - 66:37
    Yeah
  • 66:37 - 66:38
    Don't kill us
  • 66:38 - 66:40
    This is a gay cup podcast by
    the way
  • 66:40 - 66:43
    So if you're watching right now Kid
    Rock you're gay!
  • 66:43 - 66:46
    (Laughter) Gotcha Bitch!
  • 66:46 - 66:47
    Dude you're so gay!
  • 66:47 - 66:48
    You're so gay Kid Rock!
  • 66:49 - 66:50
    Got you!
  • 66:50 - 66:52
    You didn't even realize you're
    just ingesting a bunch of gay content
  • 66:52 - 66:54
    Kid Rock kiss
  • 66:54 - 66:55
    What now?
  • 66:55 - 66:57
    (Uproarious Laughter)
  • 66:57 - 66:58
    You just kissed Kid Rock!
  • 66:59 - 67:00
    I just kissed you bro!
    What's up bro?
  • 67:00 - 67:02
    Damn what are gonna do?
    What are you gonna do about it?
  • 67:03 - 67:05
    Nahhh he's not ready
    Oh you were gonna take your shirt off?
  • 67:05 - 67:07
    He's not watching anymore
  • 67:07 - 67:08
    I'm a little embarassed of my body!
  • 67:08 - 67:11
    (Laughter)
  • 67:11 - 67:14
    Alright, well, there you go we've done it
  • 67:14 - 67:16
    This whole episode was just to get
    Kid Rock to kiss Frank
  • 67:16 - 67:21
    Guess what? Not sponsored by any
    beer
  • 67:21 - 67:22
    Yeah not yet!
  • 67:22 - 67:24
    We wanna support beer!
  • 67:24 - 67:25
    We wanna support the beer!
  • 67:25 - 67:29
    That's the only thing that made me upset
    about the whole collaboration was that
  • 67:29 - 67:32
    I didn't get the collaboration
  • 67:32 - 67:34
    Oh I've gotten collaborated-
    I've collaborated with Bud Light
  • 67:34 - 67:35
    -They're friends of mine
    What give?
  • 67:35 - 67:37
    They're friends of mine!
  • 67:37 - 67:37
    Bullshit!
  • 67:38 - 67:38
    Eh
  • 67:38 - 67:40
    Welp, that's all Frank where can they
    find you?
  • 67:40 - 67:42
    Can find me uhhhhhh
  • 67:42 - 67:45
    Just going into town on some Bud Light
    I guess
  • 67:45 - 67:46
    Ok
  • 67:46 - 67:49
    Just polishing it off
    -Just polishing
  • 67:49 - 67:50
    Just spit shining
  • 67:50 - 67:52
    Me and my friend playing footsy
  • 67:52 - 67:58
    Yeah it's like "Me and my boy in the
    back of a truck looking at the stars we're
    gonna fuck!"
  • 67:58 - 68:00
    That's Kid Rock's next song I'm telling
    you right now
  • 68:00 - 68:01
    Probably not
    -Probably not
  • 68:01 - 68:02
    F-alvers85 on Twitter
  • 68:02 - 68:04
    The Frank Alvers on all other forms of
    social media
  • 68:04 - 68:05
    Keep your eyes peeled
  • 68:05 - 68:06
    We got some good stuff coming out
  • 68:06 - 68:09
    On Patreon. Patreon.com/TheBasementYard
  • 68:09 - 68:11
    Joe, back to you!
  • 68:11 - 68:13
    (chuckles) Uh you can find me at
  • 68:13 - 68:16
    Joe Santigato on all social media and
    go follow the show on Tiktok and Instagram
  • 68:16 - 68:19
    and @ the basement yard on that and
    that is all, see ya guys next time
  • 68:19 - 68:20
    GAHHHH (happy punch)
  • 68:20 - 68:31
    End of Video
Title:
Some People Are Boycotting Bud Light | The Basement Yard #394
Description:
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Video Language:
English
Team:
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Duration:
01:08:31

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