Get rid of the unnecessary to get down to basics | Colin Wright | TEDxINSA

Colin Wright is an author, entrepreneur, and full-time traveler who moves to a new country every four months based on the votes of his readers. He is the author of over thirty books, is the co-founder of Asymmetrical Press, and through his blog, Exile Lifestyle, Colin reaches over two-million people each year with his writing about lifestyle, travel, and personal fulfillment.
In a talk full of individual experiences, he will show you how easily you can get rid of the superfluous to focus on your true needs and become more free.

This talk was given at a TEDx event using the TED conference format but independently organized by a local community. Learn more at http://ted.com/tedx

The slideshow is haunted,
so I'm going to just put this here -

(Laughter)

and just go with this.

Hello, thank you so much!

So, my name is Colin Wright.

I am very, very fortunate
to live a very unusual lifestyle.

I move to a new country
every four months

and do my best to live like a local,

and that country is decided on
by my blog readers,

they vote on what country I move to.

(Laughter)

And while there, I write books -

I write books for a living,
I'm an author -

and I write books about travel,
and about business, and philosophy,

relationships, science-fiction novels -

kind of whatever is interesting
to me at the moment.

And I feel very, very fortunate
to be able to pursue these interests,

these many interests of mine
that I geek out about all the time,

and to be able to do this for a living,
to share with other people for a living.

And the reason that I'm able to do this
is not happenstance,

it was a very intentionally
cultivated lifestyle.

I'd like to talk to you
about that idea of intentionality,

but first, I want to talk
to you about a shirt.

And it's a shirt that we all have,

probably, I'm guessing
most of us have this shirt.

It's the shirt that,
when you wake up in the morning,

and you go into your dresser, you know,
and you open up the shirt drawer,

you take it out and you
look at it, maybe try it on,

it doesn't quite go
with everything else that you're wearing,

it's shaped a little weird,
maybe it's a little boxy, a little short,

like the sleeve is a blousy, weird shape,
it doesn't quite fit you,

it's not a good fit for you

and what you're trying
to get out of a shirt.

So you fold it back up,
and you put it back in the drawer,

maybe put some other shirts on top of it,

so you don't have
to deal it again for a while.

(Laughter)

It sucks, because it's
a really nice shirt,

you spent a little bit of money on it,
but it doesn't quite fit you,

and so maybe someday, maybe someday
you will wear this shirt, but not today.

(Laughter)

And about seven years ago,

I found myself going
through that shirt routine

where I go in, take out
the shirt and look at it.

But on that day, I didn't follow through
with the rest of the routine.

On that day, I crushed it in my hand,
said, "Not today, shirt!"

(Laughter)

And I threw it on the floor.

What had changed?

Well, I realized, on that day,
seven years ago,

that I was ostensibly successful,

I was doing really well professionally,

I was running a branding studio
out of Los Angeles,

and I was a young person
making a great deal of money

and experiencing professional success.

And like a lot of young people

who make a great deal of money
for the first time in their lives,

I bought a lot of stuff.

And I filled my townhouse with stuff,
and I filled my drawers with stuff,

so I had all this excess clothing.

And holding up that shirt

really made apparent something
that I was thinking for a while.

Because I was thinking
of re-calibrating my life,

to try to move away

from the "work hard all the time to make
as much money as possible" lifestyle

that I was enjoying in some ways,
but was not truly fulfilling,

it wasn't allowing me
to do the things I wanted to do.

I was thinking, maybe
I can figure out a lifestyle,

a way that I could travel,

a way that I could
go out and see the world,

all these places I was hearing about.

But I don't know if you know anything
about the American education system,

we don't learn much about other countries.

(Laughter)

I was really hoping to get out,
see some of these other countries,

and see the real people there
rather than what you hear on "Fox News."

(Laughter)

And so, I was looking at all this stuff,
and suddenly, these things that I saw

as a representation
of how well I had done,

seems like anchors.

They were a bunch of anchors,
holding me back,

because I had to do something with them,

and they made sense in this space
while I was living there,

but if I wanted to travel,

I would have to do something
with all of this stuff.

And so I was thinking, well maybe
I'll get a smaller apartment,

just for the stuff.

You know, my shirts and things
can have their own place,

and I'll just pay for that
while I'm traveling,

so there will be this weird
common stuff apartment,

somewhere in the United States,

as I travel.

Or maybe just a storage space,
somewhere that I can keep my stuff.

But looking at that shirt -

this valuable shirt, it was nice, it was
a really somewhat expensive shirt -

and in that moment, I felt like Pharaoh,

I felt like I was burying myself
with my riches.

I had all of this valuable stuff,
sitting there in my home,

that I wasn't doing anything with.

I wasn't using the shirt.

I wasn't using
most of the stuff that I had,

it was sitting there,
collecting dust, as I hoarded it

so that nobody else could have it.

And it only hit me just then.

And so I crumpled the shirt,
thew it on the floor,

shouted at it for some reason,
I'm not sure why -

(Laughter)

I was more upset with myself
than the shirt.

And then I went through
the rest of my drawer.

And I held up each object and said,
"Is this valuable to me?"

Not "Is it just valuable?",

because almost everything
is valuable to someone,

"Is it valuable to me?"

And in the case of my clothing,
it was really easy.

I could say, "Have I worn this
in the last month?"

And if not, it went on the floor.

I went through the entire drawer,
pulled out all the shirts I hadn't worn,

went through the next drawer,
all of my pants,

went through the closets,
all of my jackets and my shoes,

went through the office,
all of the computers -

I had a bunch of spare computers,
for some reason.

(Laughter)

All the extra tools, and notebooks,
and art supplies,

all of these things I went through to see
what I was actually getting value from.

Very little of it.

Like 95 percent of everything I owned
was there on the floor.

And the pile was so big,

I had to take an entire room
in my flat to store it all.

I had a room full of stuff I wasn't using
that I was hoarding like Pharaoh.

There is a word for this -

not for hoarding, not for that,
there's many words for that,

none of them good -

but there's a word for what I was doing,

iteratively going through my life

and questioning the things
I took for granted.

It's called intentionality.

And intentionality, it's not a scary word,

it's something that we build up,
I think, very often,

but all it means is
doing things on purpose.

And that does require
that you have a purpose,

that you have some kind of goal,
off on the horizon.

Once you have that, once you understand

what you want to achieve,
where you want to go,

acting intentionality just means

looking at all the different aspects
of your life and saying,

"Does this help me get there?"

So, getting rid of those things

was a step that helped me
get to where I wanted to be.

And intentionality is something
that applies to all aspects of your life.

When we apply it to the things,
the possessions in our lives,

we tend to call this
minimalism, very often -

that's kind of the common moniker
for it these days, which is great -

and all minimalism is,

is focusing on the core,
what's important -

whatever that happens to mean to you -

and getting rid of the excess,

getting rid of all the stuff
that doesn't matter

so that you free up more time,
energy, and resources

to spend on the things that do matter.

So it's a reallocation of your efforts,
and attention, and your money, basically.

So if I spend less
on the things that don't matter,

I have more to spend
on the things that do matter.

It's an incredibly simple thing,

and yet it's something
that we tend to forget

because there's a lot of messages
telling us that to be someone,

we have to own this thing,
we have to own this brand,

we have to stand with this group
and be represented by this tribe.

And it's obviously not true,

we're never more ourselves

than when we're buying
and surrounding ourselves

with exactly the things that serve us,

that give us value
and nothing more than that.

But that's not very lucrative

for these companies that have things
that they want to sell a lot of.

So you have to pay a lot of attention
and really focus on intentionality

in order to remember this
as you're making purchases.

Now, the same thing
applies to relationships.

And this is something that a lot of us
don't think of, like ever,

because it's not polite, frankly.

(Laughter)

Because, just as
intentionality with your stuff

means going through
your things and saying,

"Which of these is valuable,
and which of them is dead-weight?",

going through your relationships
and doing the same

means looking at them and saying,

"Which of these is the most vitally
important relationships in my life?

Which of these is just good?"

You know, friendships
and relationships of convenience,

the person you sit next to at work,

that you happen to go to school with,

who happens to live next door -

valuable relationships,

maybe not the things
that should have all of your time,

they're great in context,
but these are not your best friends,

these are not your significant others,
these are not your family.

And then there is
those relationships that drain us,

that are actually
net-negatives on our lives,

and we tend to invest a lot in these

because it's not polite
to step out of a friendship,

to step away from a family member,
to give them less of your time

if they are actively harmful
to you and your life,

if they are a toxic relationship.

Being intentional
with your relationships, though,

it means really being
truthful with yourself and saying,

"Is this a person who deserves more
of my time, and intention, and energy?"

Do they?

And if not, if the answer is no,

free up that time, take it and give it
to the people who truly do,

the people who really add to your life,
who really make you feel better,

who help you get to where you want to be.

That's the root of intentionality,
it's doing it on purpose,

forming relationships
and maintaining relationships on purpose,

and making sure those really, really
truly valuable people in your life

get the attention from you
that they deserve.

Now, the same applies to work.

This is also a very
unpopular thing to say.

Because we judge our work
and our success within work

based on usually just one metric:
how much money are you making?

That's what shows if you're successful,
the family's proud of you,

but really, at the end of the day,
that's just one metric.

Money is great!

I mean, I'm not anti-money.

You need it, you need to have a roof
over your head, food on your table,

to provide a basic level of security
for yourself and the people around you,

but if you're acting intentionaly,
if you're doing work on purpose,

that means that you're looking at
that bigger goal,

that place that you want to be,

and questionning every choice
that you make within your profession,

saying, "Does this help me get
to that place where I want to be?

That place where I am more myself
than I have ever been before,

where I'm incredibly happy,
where I'm fulfilled on a deeper level,

and I feel like I'm doing work
that is valuable,

not just to me in the paychecks' sense,
but to somebody beyond me,

I feel like I'm contributing in some way."

And once you're able to question that,

you've looked at the three core
components of a healthy lifestyle -

and each and everyone of us

has a different idea
of what the ideal lifestyle is,

a different idea of the people
that we want in our lives,

the things that we want to have
surrounding us,

because if you buy the right things,
things actually can earn you happiness,

money can buy happiness
if you buy the right things -

the people in our lives
and the work that we do day-to-day.

These are all things that,
when in aggregate,

allow us to live a lifestyle
that when you look at it, it's you;

this is something that represents me.

The lifestyle that I live,
the incredibly bizarre lifestyle

where I travel around
and write all kinds of books,

my readers vote on where I go,
what's that about?

It's strange, but it looks just like me!

And the people who know me well
look at it and say,

"Oh yeah, that's totally Colin!
That makes perfect sense."

And ideally, each and everyone of us

can look at our lives
and say the same thing.

These people I surround myself with,
this stuff that I own,

this work that I'm doing,

this is an accurate
representation of who I am.

That's the ideal.

And each and everyone of us
should be proud

to have our own individual path
toward that greater goal,

toward that purpose.

When you start
to live your life intentionaly,

it can look a little weird to people.

You're getting rid of your stuff, maybe.

It looks very strange to some people.

You may be buying more intentionaly,
buying fewer things,

hanging out with fewer people -

that can be a little bit awkward
to have that discussion -

and maybe taking on work
that isn't just lucrative,

it's not earning you as much,

it doesn't have the same
prestigious job title.

At the end of the day,
you may experience some push-back,

people may try to dissuade you

from moving in the direction
that you want to move in.

And that's okay, you know.

These are not people
who are horrible people,

these are people that are actually
very well-meaning people,

because if you look at the standard path
that we're offered,

pretty much from birth up until we die,

this is the path, this is where you start,
and then you do this, this, and this,

and then victory, you end up
at that finish line, at some point.

That path is like a great big highway,
it's an autobahn, okay?

It's well paved, it's well-lit,
there's a lot of signs everywhere

telling you exactly
how to get there, to this goal.

And if you start moving
toward a different goal,

you've moved off that well-lit path,
maybe there's potholes,

maybe it's not paved,
maybe it's like a little goat road,

like, you're just swerving off to the side,

very few people are taking this,
so they don't even bother to put up signs.

Maybe your lifestyle choice is so obscure,
nobody's done it before,

and so you're like carving your way
through the woods

to try to get to some unknown path.

And so the people in your life
will look at that and say,

"What the actual hell are they doing?

(Laughter)

I'm concerned for them!
Where will they end up?

There's so many risks
associated with this."

And they're totally right!

Because people who care about you,

they want more than anything else
for you to be happy and secure.

And when you start acting intentionaly,

when you start questioning
everything in your life

and living on purpose, your purpose,

it can look very unsecure,
it can be less structurally stable,

so it makes sense
that they would question that,

and that they should question
what you're doing

and give you that valuable feedback.

But at the end of the day,
all you can do to convince them,

to show them that this is something
that's important to you,

that you're not going to take
ridiculous risks,

you're just trying to be happy,
you're trying to be more you,

is to show them the benefits,

tell them what you're up to, certainly,

but then show them
with the way that you live,

that you are happy,
that you're making smart decisions,

that this is something
that allows you to feel fulfilled

in a way that that highway never could.

And if they don't get it, that's okay.

Everybody has a different path,
they have theirs and you have yours.

And try to forgive,
don't hold it against them.

Not everybody has the opportunity
to take that step back,

and look at their life,
and then question everything.

It's not a luxury
that all of us are afforded.

But whichever direction you start heading,
whichever life choice you make,

do your best to be happy,
do your best to be fulfilled,

do your best to lay signs for other people
who might follow behind you

so that they can do the same.

And ultimately, however you live,
do your best to live on purpose.

Thank you very much.

(Applause)