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Sweetheart, this scene is fantastic. The novel is gonna be awesome.
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Great.
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Now you just need people to buy it.
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Yes, that's why I have to finish it first.
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Of course.
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Listen.
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Girl looks at guy. Guy looks at girl.
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He hesitates. She waits.
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What would you do?
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Well I don't know darling. You're the author.
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I only have two degrees and five MBAs.
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I almost would've said you were 'posh'.
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I'm just stuck on the love scene.
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You're stuck?
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That happens sometimes.
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What would you say to the guy to be romantic?
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Um....
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I think I'm pregnant.
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I told you to "be romantic". Not ruin his life.
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But it's true. I think I'm pregnant.
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You! Pregnant?!
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Yes, me.
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If you were my mother or my neighbour I wouldn't tell you.
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Just hold on a second. How could that have happened?
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Well it usually occurs when the sperm penetrates the ovary, makes contact with a mature egg, comes together with the cell and fertilizes it.
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Errr, it does all of that?
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Yes, every now and then.
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But, but you're on the pill.
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Do you remember that evening we got carried away with the mojitos?
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When the policemen came to get you down off the lampost?
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Yes, well I think that instead of taking the pill , I swallowed my right contact lens.
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I couldn't find it for the life of me.
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A contact lens got you pregnant?!
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Something like that.
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And you are completely sure?
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Not completely, I'm gonna take a test.
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A pregnancy test?!
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I dunno what scares me more - to find out I'm pregnant or to find out that you're the father.
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There's another man?!
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No darling. There are certain genes...
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SingingasongaboutMadrilenianstew.
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Good morning.
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Pepa, don't add too much pork fat. You know that it makes me feel ill.
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Take it easy sweetheart.
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Excuse me ma'am, but is that not what makes your husband feel ill?
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Rubbish! Morcilla and chorizo make him feel worse.
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And why is it called "Madrilenian" stew?
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Well,to give it a name. This is eaten all over the world. ALZAK (?) took it to Japan, and all the Chinese became wide-eyed in wonder.
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The Chinese? In Japan?
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You heard me.
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SingingasongaboutMadrilenianstew.
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Do you know the secret to cooking the perfect stew?
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Singing to it?
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Not at all! That's what you do to your plants. Look.
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Chickpeas from Fuentesaúco. Morcilla from Burgos. Chorizo from Cantimpalos. And tap water.
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Look.
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What should I look at?
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In which countries do they do THAT?
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In my country.
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In your country? ??But the *** is radioactive.
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I'm Bulgarian.
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Really? Well would you look at that. I didn't think you were vulgar at all.
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Pepa! How's that stew coming along?
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??That man thinks the sun shines out of his arse??
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Well just you wait and find out!
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Ma'am, but that is...
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Shh! You be quiet now, you're a foreigner.
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??***??
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But you're going to eat it ma'am.
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No my dear, I won't. I'm on a diet.
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Singingasongtothestew.
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And are you sure it changes colour?
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Yessss.
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If I were pregnant, would that make you happy?
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????????????????
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But it could be wonderful, couldn't it?
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No. ...... ?????
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My mother had a difficult pregnancy.
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My mother's was worse.
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How much did you weigh...
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76kg
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when you were born?
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Ohhh. I don't know. I was very young.
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I was 3.5kg...and 8kg...???????
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That must've hurt like a bitch.
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What are you talking about? Luci was anesthetized when her labour pains started.
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Is she a member of the Labour party?
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Labour pain is what you experience when you give birth.
