Historieätarna S01E01 - Stormaktstiden

My name is Lotta Lundgren, and this is Erik Haag

In this show we will be "wallraffing", lending our bodies to six different eras in Swedish history.

We will figure out how it felt to live in another time than our own.

What were your thoughts? How did you sleep? What did you smell like and what did you feel?

But most of all, what kind of food was on the plate?

"The age of great power"

This week we will live in "the age of great power". We will try the lives of the nobility,

the freemen and the farmers, balance our four bodily fluids, go to war

and drink incredible amounts of beer. And we get no other food than what was eaten in the 17th century.

But we start the weeks experiment by getting dressed.

- Tadaa
- Oh, the noble man!

- Was it in here you had a blood stain? Yeah, that feels a bit uncomfortable actually.

- Yeah, this place is haunted.
- Alright... Well, I'll take these off then!

Lotta and me are kickstarting this week in the nobility, a very small group,

only 0,5 % of Swedens population at that time.
Like, as many swedes as there are physiotherapists in Sweden today.

But we're not just doing this because the nobility have money and funny clothes,

but because it is here where the 17th century ideas and ideals really start to flourish.

- This is kind of the style they had? Sort of like a mentally ill four year old picked the outfit?

- Men these days were supposed to be like peacocks.

- The ideal was that you were flat.
- Flat tits like this you wont even get

during a mammography.
Every eras dream woman is always

a body that is something different than what it actually is.

-Every body is to be pressed and stuffed and squeezed, pulled back and built up.

-And here we'll put this little roll.

-Does this count as manly clothing?
-This is extremely manly.

This is like the mans time to shine.
-Like Maria Montazami?

-A noble man is no noble man without his sword.
And a pearl earring,

in you right ear.
- Oh, like a cop hater?

Those in the nobility who had a a lot of money, they had a wig.

-There, okay, now you have the right silhouette for the end of the 17th centrury.

A straight, flat silhouette, cone shaped. It shows a youthful character.

- Alright, now you look god, but you would have been pretty disgusting.

Cause you didn't wash yourself perticularly often, you smelled bad.

And of course you had lice.
- It itches when you talk about lice!

But it could also be because it's hot in this wig.
But now I'm done, right?

I'll just walk around this....

-Oh. Oh but you look nice!
What are you laughing at?

- Well that you're going to look like this all week.
- But I've got a lot of... sort of...

these things...
-I'm so proud of you.

This was the size of Sweden the first half of the 17th century, our kings name

was Gustav II Adolf, his job is to start and win wars.

The rest of the swedes are divided into four classes; Nobility, priests, freemen and peasants.

These classes must be kept apart at all costs. Eg; The farmer may not dress or eat

like the nobility, or the whole society would go to shit.

-The greatest challenge with the food this week is working with ingredients

that aren't fresh. It all has to be baked, boiled or seared for a long time.

Seared food, that was only for people with a lot of money.

The common people probably never had seared or grilled food, you had boiled food.

-This is Magnus Nilsson, he owns the restaurant Fäviken. He dries and leavens

and has no issues with wierd ingredients, but we still say he doesn't understand

how massive this undertaking of his is, cooking for us for a week.

-This is your week in front of you.
Or at least the fresh ingredients.

-It doesn't look very... juicy?
-No

-What's this?
-Um, that is a dried duck - Oh, of course

Maybe we should take the time to say that this is not make-belief,

this is authentic.
-Yes, it actually is. It was just like this.

DRIED HAM & SALTED PORK

CAPERCAILLIE & FILEDFARE

SPICES OF THE WEEK
CINNAMON, GINGER, CLOVE, NUTMEG

-Is it tasty food?
-Um, well, the ingredients are pretty tasty.

But I think a lot of the cooking techniques won't really fit our modern flavour preference.

Some of it well be more or less inedible, to be honest.

-Which one will be the most disgusting?
-You'll have to wait and see!

-Exciting.
But when we have eaten this food,

how will we feel after a week?
-I'm not very concerned about the food,

because it's pretty good. It's well rounded, meat and fish and even fresh fruit.

What troubles me is all the alcohol. Massive amounts of beer.

The way I see it, you'll be drunk most of the time. Fall over and say silly things.

And your liver will be in distress. Alcohol is a clinical and societal problem.

-But we're only drinking beer because we can't drink the water, right? Why?

-Yeah, water is scarse and it is not clean, that's where many diseases spread.

But the most difficult thing for me and Lotta will probably be that we can't drink coffee,

why can't we drink coffee?
-There is no coffee yet.

And that means trouble, because you, like all swedes, are addicted to caffeine,

and you will get headaches, everything from mild to migraine,

irritation, you'll just feel generally bad.

What did the nobility have for lunch on a normal Monday?

And which of these 130 rooms is the dining room?

NOBILITY LUNCH

-Lotta, where are we eating?
-What?

-Oh, OK. I was in there waiting.
Where are the drinks?

-Here you have a snaps, to have before, during or after lunch.

Just a shot like this, instead of a shot glass.

-Now I have massive expectations on this food.

INTESTINE STEW

This is one of the few dishes you'll eat that actually contains fresh ingredients.

-STOP! Did you hear that? We will barely eat any fresh food all week!?

And that's because almost all food has to be preserved. Storage food. Resume

It's this intestine stew, which has kidney from lamb, heart, liver, braised to a

sort of gruel, with just a bit of this sweetened, german wine and some grains.

And then there are a few rooster heads in the mix as well.

We are eating things people ate if you were really rich and successful in Sweden,

400 years ago.
-I'm going to try this kidney.

-It wasn't that tasty to me. Nah, tastes a lot like stable to me. Like cows fur.

-Cows fur?
I think it's time for these rooster heads!

-Ok, but, like, how?
-Oh you just eat them straight up.

Oh fuck... There was some kind of... like hard shit... Cheers!

-As a woman in the 17th century nobility I can be someones wife, mother,

the housekeeper and that's it. I belong to my dad until I marry,

then I belong to my husband.
(ERIK)- LOTTA! Have you seen my slippers?

-I'm not alllowed to get an education, intelligence is not something women have.

(ERIK)-I FOUND THEM! I was wearing them all along.

-But I have to be great at hosting parties, and play the lute.

(Erik)- I've lost them again.
- Do you want to join?

-Oh, yeah, god, sorry. I just got a bit thirsty.

Tonight Lotta and Erik will have a menu with a variety of dishes, most of them from a book

called "The Counts Brahe's winterbook", recipes typical for this era.

What I'm doing here is placing these oysters in with this sort of rice pudding.

Oh fuck me that's disgusting.

Health, not taste, is focus at this times fine dining. Not strange

considering how sick people were, and what little could be done about it.

"Humorism" was the prevalent teaching, according to which

you should eat to balance the four bodily fluids. The body was seen sort of like a

sack of skin with fluids, where blood, mucus, yellow and black bile

were wobbling around inside. Too much or too little of any fluid was no good.

But this could be remedied with food! We are having a healthy dinner,

with our permanent companion, Rickard Tällström.

DRIED REINDEER WITH EAST INDIAN SPICES

PIDGEON IN WINE AND VINEGAR

BOILED GOAT IN BLACKCURRANT
-Two of the dishes are fiery,

two are subduing, according to humorism.
-My guess is that the oysters...

- They should be subduing, right?
-Yeah, and then I think the goad in jam,

silly as it may sound, is also subduing?
-Yes, that is correct.

According to humorism wild meat is fiery and the sweets, the berries and the oysters are subduing.

-When was this decided?
-Well as an idea it came during antiquity,

that certain foods could treat imbalance in your body. During the age of Great Power

it became important to relate to the balance of society, eating to be in balance,

ensuring that the societal classes are not mixed. What do you think?

-I think that one was disgusting.
-Melon, oysters, nettles and rice.

This was not put together to be tasty, that's obvious to me.

-But it was really nice, this very salted pork, with pidgeon.

Kippis

-What are we doing here?
-We're here to take care of our personal hygiene.

Our hygiene must be taken care of without water. In the 1600's water was

thought to carry diseases. And if you got wet you body could liquify and rot away.

You brush youre teeth with one of these little sticks.

It was believed that cavities came from small worms that lived in your mouth.

And how to treat that? Well, you rinse your mouth with vinegar.

-Vinager?!
.Yup, and that's what we're doing now.

-You can't possibly?

-It really hurts my lips.
-Oh, it stings!

-Take some beer! Why did you do that?

-It hurts so much!
-That was day one, and I feel pretty good.

You get a bit... tired from eating wierd food all the time.

-I've eaten rooster head, lamb kidney, some other intestine, uhm, pidgeon...

Duck, I think? And I'm not used to eating this many animals in one day.

I feel very crowded inside.
-Our dietary consultant, she warned us

that if you drink alcohol instead of water like we do, it could lead to people becoming violent.

But I haven't seen anything like that with Lotta. I think she's a bit more of a chatterbox,

but not violent, it hasn't been unpleasant yet.

The captains logbook, day two! I am dehydrated and nauseous after last nights healthy dinner.

I think you're all saying "food, food, food", when is it going to be about

something interesting, like war? Yes it will, because we will meet with a war historian.

But first, breakfast! I want bacon and eggs.

NOBILITY BREAKFAST

RYEBREAD

OAT PORRIDGE
-Good morning. - Morning

-Beer.
- Is it?

-Warm beer.
-No really? Oh. Yummy.

-And we've gotten some sort of porridge.

-Really good actually. I think this feels very healthy, very al dente.

I feel like this is where our modern healthy breakfast is born.

This will go, this will stay
-It's kind of yucky and nice that the beer is warm.

-Yeah, cause it's so cold here.
-And it was a lot colder,

you should be lucky to get 14 degrees in a castle, in the 1600's.

-Now Erik will be happy, we are finally going to talk about war! With historian, Bo Eriksson.

-But it's kind of fun that Sweden, who feels like a small country in Europe today,

was number one or at least, maybe, number two, maybe?

-Haha, no, we were number one, we set the agenda, but I still think it's a terrible century.

The civilian loss amongst the people exposed to the Swedish army was vast,

we're talking hundreds of thousands of people.
-Yeah, Erik, did you hear that?

-This is King Gustaf II Adolf, I want to say Hero King!

The Hero King that made Sweden a great power. Sadly, Gustaf was slain

in the battle of Lützen 1632. But despite this Sweden continued to grow,

all the way in to the 18th century.
-Who was part of this so called army?

-It's partially the military, the soldiers, and then there were the camp followers.

And amongst those we find the civilian. The soldiers brought their women,

their children. It was a society in miniature. And imagine, this is 40'000 people.

Some even say that the greatest torment for the civilians in Germany

were the camp followers.
-I'm trying to understand how these marriages

would work?
-But like, all respect to the gender perspective,

but if we have a situation where Sweden is a super power during a short period of time,

wouldn't it be interesting to just like explain how Sweden could be so successful?

-Yes. Firstly, the moving artillery. was an expert at... No this is actually interesting!

-Sure...
-It was smaller cannons, that you could move

during the battle, and that was new.
The second part was the shock factor fire power,

that was the Swedes biggest weapons.
-The catholics shat their pants!

-Ha, yes, but so did probably the Swedes, since it was an incredible noise.

Anyway. You had three rows who fired at the same time.

One one laying on the ground
(Are you listening, Lotta?!)
one sitting and one standing.

-Imagine the shock!
-Yes! And imagine hundreds of those!

And then your opponent is approaching and BANG, you fire.

-So that was the Swedish style?
-That was a winning concept, yes.

-So this is like our camp now?
-Yes, let's say a few miles outside of Lützen.

-But Bo, could you say that it's 50% women and 50% men?

-But like hold it, Lotta, seriously, if this is a war camp, shoudn't Bo and I secure it?

-Yes! Should I stand guard while you dig?
It was more important to get up than down.

-Interrupted again, completely in accordance with the 17th century. Women in wars

had no say. I myself could have been one of the camp followers

and my job would have been to cook. Today we're lucky, I've got some elk meat.

So where do you get like ingredients and stuff to cook?

It's not like you find a supermarket in the middle of Lutsen?
-No, and that's...

-LÜTZEN!
-Haha... even the horse was laughing there.

No, but when passing villages you had to take what was at hand.

But not only food was taken, you pillaged, murdered and raped.

-You can't make an omelette without breaking a few eggs.

-Well, yeah, but what happened was that the hens eventually... ran out.

CAMP FOOD

-And this is to my own little hero.

ELK AND TURNIPS IN BEER

-Yum! If this is what was served in the camp you kind of wish you had been there!

-Yeah! Except the plague and all the rapes
-Haha well yes, except those.

-But when talking about the age of Great Power, such a unique time in Swedish

history, what should be said to not... pass it off compelety?

-I think it should be said that this was the worst time in Swedish history.

When the army came to a village, plundering, what happened to the survivors?

Well they joined the killers, to those who killed their parents.

It was about survival, a deeply tragic chapter in Swedens history, which has been

romanticised. But I think it's time to tell the truth, this should never happen again.

-As a general I could take a vacation from fighting, visit a buddy with a castle maybe

to do some partying and dancing.

-Erik as a dance partner is, ehm... I suspect that Erik is considerably heavier

than the average 17th century man, and I think there will be problems.

-Right foot!
-Left.
-Left?

-Dance was very important. It was exercise, culture and flirting,

and fun! At least they thought so back then.
Not being able to dance

was a social handicap that could damage your career and reputation.

-Today we say that all people have equal value, and their own personality.

In the 17th century it was the opposite. People had a different value

depending on their class, and the same personality as everyone else in that class.

The emotional, passionate type could only exist here, in the nobility.

-Should I perhaps... - Or if I go....
-But that might be... -Or maybe you should...?

The Age of Great Power in Sweden is all about honor. People are easily offended

and your honor must constantly be guarded from gossip and bullshit.

Amongst the crimes that went to court, defamation was one of the most common.

We are having dinner with Erik Falk, he is an expert in insults. To honor him

we are using a classic 17th century trick. We have ordered a surprise dinner!

But first, some Fieldfare for a starter!
FIELDFARE IN CINNAMON SAUCE

There you go, Lotta. So the scull should be cracked, like a crayfish

and then you suck the nice stuff out from inside of the head.

-Are you really doing that? Cracking the skull?

-Yeah. It was nice.
- I think it is really tasty.

-Isnt't that surprising?
-It is very, very tender!

-Erik, explain to me, honor is really in the center during this time. What is "honor"?

-The honor is your badge of identity, your credibility, this honor

that by no means should be violated. It was a crime to insult someone or slander him.

-Say something that would be considered as slander?

-Well, if Lotta thought you were too flamboyantly dressed, she might say

"wigfin", maybe. Or peacock. Or long heron.
-Try once, to say long heron.

-Ok. Long heron! How does he feel?
- He's offended.

-During this time very few people in Sweden know how to read and write?

-Yes! And in a verbal culture, words hurt more somehow.

If you call me a thief, it feels like I become a thief, and people start believing it.

-Amongst the worst things you could say was to liken someone to an animal, right?

-Yes! And do you know which the worst animal to be likened to was?

-A badger from a cartoon!
-No, a dog.

-And so it is time for the surprise.
-Shall we start with these 17th century

kinder eggs for adults? A fish in bread, is my guess.

-It's like something is going to fly out of it now, isn't it?

-Hah, it seems to be some kind of mince. Meatloaf! Fun!

-Why were they doing it like this, Lotta?
-When we get something that looks

like a fish, but it is meat, that is incredibly funny to the 17th century person.

Are you having fun, over there?
-Oh yes. But we're trying not to laugh.

-But if you imagine a situation where someone is writing something demeaning

about someone else, in regards of their profession

and that this person is talking like an animal, for an example.
-That's terrible!

That someone talks like an animal!
-But if, if someone did write like that

about someone, could you imagine that having deadly consequences?

Because of something like that? Like "you're talking like a badger in a cartoon"?

-Ehm, that is not totally implausible.

-ALEX SHULMAN! Come out!
Is it there? Ah.

This is a print out from Alex Shulmans blog. "I'm annoyed with how Erik Haag

says 'like this' all the time. Why does he do that? I'm annoyed with all of him,

he talks like you imagine a badger from a cartoon."

Why would you even write that about someone?
-Hi! Erik.

-Yeah I heard you shouting from the street, my daughter woke up.

-Oh, my apologies. And give my best to Amanda! Ok?

This was on your blog!
-Ok, I don't remember it?

"Annoyed with all of him... he speaks the way you'd imagine a badger in a cartoon does."

Haha, well yeah that is true. I'd say that's fairly well put. You speak strangely? You do!

I feel offended! I demand redress! Duel, I say!
-How long is it going to take, kind of, Erik?

-This is Thibault, he's an expert at duelling. Cheers, by the way.

If I want to challenge Alex to a duel, since he has offended me, how do I do that?

-If you have glove, you can...
-I do!!

-Yeah, exactly!
-But I can decline, right?

I can say no thanks?
-You can, yes, but it was very unusual.

-Where is this broadcasted, which channel?
(Producer) -SVT

-SVT? OK, then I'm in. -This could be very quick.
-I accept, or whatever you call it.

What if I stabbed you in the throat so that you got a normal voice?

-Yeah, imagine. Or if I chopped your hands off so that you couldn't write shit about people.

-En garde
-You can back out now if you want.

-Ouch!
-First blood, Erik, victor!

-Redress!
-That was quick.

-Erik Haag doesn not speak strangely, he does not annoy me and he does not speak

like he's in a cartoon.
-A badger.

-After a couple of fun but fuggy days in the nobility it is now time to step down.

As a warm up we are meeting with children of freemen. And then we too will become freemen.

Hello everyone. Pleasure. My name is Lotta.
Hi, I'm Erik. We are guidance counselors

from the 17th century.
-Yes, and we are here to talk about you future.

- I want to be a doctor.
Veterinarian, dancer, archeologist, actress.

Look at these children, so full of hope. Had they been children of freemen, they would

have been born into a guild, that could not be changed. They never had to worry

about what to become when they grew up.
First journeyman, and then same as daddy.

-Yeah, we have a message to you from the 17th century, that we think can be of use to you.

FORGET YOUR DREAM

-So, thank you for having us. We will visit all students in the Uppsala region these weeks.

Now it's time to try the life of a freeman. The labor office for cultural workers

is yet to be invented, so I have to work as a brushmaker.

-Damn, this is going to be a good one. Fuck... like damn, hell, this is great.

Lotta is going to sell fish.
-I'm selling this one!

Free competition has not broken through yet, instead there are the previous mentioned

guilds that determine how many craftsmen that can work within the same field.

Here's that balance again that's so important in the 1600's.

If there's a good amount of craftsmen in the same field, they can live a great, wealthy life.

-How much is it?
-Um... Well... 2000 SEK?

-Here's how it is, I get to the office and then I make my... brushes.

It was the same yesterday, and tomorrow I will also be here. Making my brushes.

-The third day continues. It feels more free being a freeman rather than in the nobility.

Now we're leaving work and are off to sea!

-What part could you say that the boat was playing in the lives of these people?

-Boats had about the same roll to the 17th century people as the highway does today.

-So you could say that without the boat Sweden stops?
-Yes, definitely

-But what were all the boats carrying?
-Soldiers, soldiers, soldiers.

And weapons, cannons and horses, of course. That's the reason why these large ships

were being built, to participate in war.
-Are you driving today, or...?

-Eh, no.
-No, you travel by boat!

But that's the thing, you can't be too drunk at sea either!

-It's like normal beer?
-It's sort of like an easter brew. 14%!

PORRIDGE WITH PEAS AND SALTED HERRING

-Is it like extra yucky food now because it's boat-themed?

-No, I wouldn't say that. On ship at this time it was not the most important thing

that the food taste nice, it was rather that everyone got their measure.

-Yeah, I've heard that.
-And the food was heavily salted.

And you drank a substantial amount of beer-. I've read somewhere that every crew member

was given three litres of beer per day. And that was neccesary with this very salty food.

Bread was very important, and it was very hard. So what you did was first was

to tap it like this against something hard, so that larvae and other bugs fell out.

And then it was good if you had a beer or something to dip the bread in,

so you got to keep the few teeth you had left.

Damn. Watch it, lift your ass! Watch it, watch it!

The kitchens of most townies were so small and bad, that they had to make due

with ready made meals. These fast food places were called "walk-kitchens"

and could be found in ordinary houses, where men and women greeted people who

came there to eat, or did take away. As 17th century hipsters we are going to

eat at the walk-kitchen that's supposedly the best right now.

BEANS AND SALTED PORK ON BREAD

-It tastes like brown beans and pork, on a sandwich.

-Nah, not really though? It's a very dominant taste of turnips.

-I scraped my turnips off.
-Yes, but they're like poached in with it.

-It's like completely impossible to eat with this fucking fork!

I am actually pretty pleased that I got to have this hair color as a freeman. Fun to try.

And I can tell you that it's true; blondes have more fun.

After half the week I've actually gotten used to starting my day with two beers.

It's funny how that helps against tiredness and doubts regarding this whole experiment.

-Yes, and so ends our day as freemen. The food was a bit too salty for my taste,

tomorrow out trials continues in a differenct class.

-Day four. Today we, and Björn Gustavsson, will live the life of the common people,

as farmers in the countryside. What farmers do? Well they work

from sunrise to sunset. Children start working at the age of six,

and there is nothing strange about that. There are no schools anyway

unless you're noble or the son of a priest. The one born as a farmer

lives and dies as a farmer, that's just the way it is. Class journeys are forbidden.

-It's strange, the sausage. It's completely gone. The big sausage.

-Really? The one that was going to last us all winter? That's too bad.

So this is Björn. He's also a farmer, poor thing, but he's also a child with special talents.

-A big, long sausage that we had. You know the one. Come here, let me smell you.

-It's a witch! She's a witch!
-What are you talking about?

-I've found a witch here!

-If there's anything you remember from history class it is probably the witch burnings

The fires burned for 100 years, and I feel like... one of those who got burned

must have been a real witch?

How did you know who was a witch? Who said that Lotta was a witch?

-You let children testify, and often they were beggar children know as "wise boys" .

And behind this was the idea that some people were born clairvoyant.

So they pointed and said "I've seen this at the witches abode, that's a witch"

And people believed them.
-But who were these witches?

-It was often women, and often women who were lonely, widows and such.

-The single ladies, as per usual. Recognizable.

-But if you think of Lotta, for example. First she's completely unknown

and then POOF she's all over television. There has to be something wierd behind that?

-Haha, yes, but there isn't, you see.

-Alright, this will be great, god damn!
There. Great. Let's go Bengt! But why...

-You didn't light it for real, right?

-Light controlled the life of the common people. Nothing happened during darkness,

and at first light you got up, went to work, work work, witch burning, lunch.

Todays lunch is a soup that was considered a delicacy at this time.

CABBAGE SOUP & PIKE LIVER

-There's a little side dish here. Pike liver with some onions.

-Utterly terrible.
-Totally edible!

-Bengt likes it!
-Well, now I got the after taste...

-It gets to you, doesn't it!
-This is something you would give to the cat.

But it's described as a delicacy in the 1600's?

-This is before electricity, it's very dark. Are we afraid? Are we scared of the dark?

-You are very scared of the dark, and night was the time that you imagined that the dead

were leaving their graves and lots of folk lore creatures were out and about.

So you were not often outside after nightfall. And if you were you always had a light.

Which of course led to the myth that there were whisps, when you saw a flickering light.

-When you saw someone else?
-Yes, you saw a light in the distance,

and thought "is it a human or a will o the whisp?"

-Probably a whisp.

-A good way of getting out of being burned seems to be to get married.

In the neighbouring village I found this man. Or, well, my dad found him, and

his field is next to ours so now we can sow and harvest together, smooth!

...and love her in sickness and in health...
-Yes.

-Ehm. I hereby pronounce you husband and wife.

Congatulations.

Now we're married, and can eat!
The fact that different people hold different

value should naturally be reflected in the food.
The priest gets the best food,

second best is for the bride and groom. The guests have the same food as usual, but more.

You can see that we've made an effort, because we're serving Björn

a super luxurious fresh fish!

PERCH WITH APPLE & CURRANTS

PORRIDGE WITH BUCKWHEAT AND CREAM

PORRIDGE WITH RYE AND BERRIES
-I dont want to sound spoiled, but

you could think it's a bit measly with just porridge on your wedding day.

-It's a very creamy porridge we've been given, Erik.

-The luxury is the white porridge, white is so rare. Clean linen, white food, rice pudding,

that is the absolute best you have.
-But if this is feast food, what is every day food?

-The biggest difference is the amount of food. We can get absolutely stuffed.

-I think the priest wants to share his perch. Is that alright?

-Definitely. The priest eats differently from us, and gets wine instead of the coarser beer.

-But you didn't take any of this is the middle?
-No, um, I tasted...

-Oh have some now! That's what this show is about!

-Yeah, taste that now! In the middle, that stuff from the gut.

-Mm. Yummy.

Skål!

-Porridge, gruel, cabbage soup. Apparently this is what 95% of Sweden ate.

Somehow it's kind of sad, you're eating it and thinking that you're eating it every day,

three, four times a day, a whole life.
95% of the Swedes got nothing else.

Now I'm super tired. Bye.

Fifth day. We are back in the nobility, that's where it all goes down anyway.

We are living in a castle again, beer for breakfast and today

we shall be cured of our ailments.
-I'm on bed rest because of my tummy affliction.

-In the 17th century it was believed that sickness was due to an imbalance

of your bodily fluids. So what do you do when someone has a stomach ache?

ELDER FLOWER LEAVES IN OIL AND BEER VINAGER

-Now we will cure you from the shits!
-Haha, is that what I have?

-Yes.
-Hehe, sure, all the signs were pointing to that...

Wha...what is this?
-Elder flower leaves with beer vinager.

How does it taste?
-Like grass. Do you have anything to

chase it with?
-Mm, I've got this.

-What is it?!
-It's tiny christmas...

-But what is it?!
-It is warm beer with a few spices floating around...

-But this also helps with....
-The shits, yes.

-I thought we could read a bit more about other diseases and cures, from this time.

-Yeah, interesting!
-Malaria... malaria, as one gets...?

-It was quite common in Sweden.
-Really?!

-Yes, Sweden had not been properly irrigated, so large parts were under water.

So malaria mosquitos liked it a lot in Sweden.
-Well, that's alright, cause all you had to do

was eat pepper, mustard and onion to cure it.
And here's that thing you've got issues with,

gasses! Then you should take anisseed and cumin in warm beer. That's what I just had?

This is like a combo where they take a lot of diseases and lump them together,

worms in your body, head ache, evil eye, jaundice, sleeplessness, laziness or

for the alcoholic, guess that the cure is?
Warm beer! It's good for everything.

-While I'm locked up in the castle with my lute and my lacing Erik can come and go as he pleases.

-There's been a change of plans, they called from daycare and said that Diana is sick.

She's been throwing up. So I'll take care of her.

Today, children are children and adults are adults. In the 17th century

it was the opposite, children were like tiny adults and adults were like big babies.

In the nobility you put your kid in a corset and then you had someone else raise it,

while you were waiting for them to grow up and be the same as yourself.

It came as a surprise to Fredrik Lindström that we would do this interview in

my kids', who just came down with stomach flu, tiny, tiny sofa.

Show Fredrik your autograph!
-No. -No? Alright.

Could you imagine a 17th century dad staying home with a sick child?

-Parents dressed the way you are didn't really raise their children in that sense.

Other people did that. And then they met them on formal occasions or parties,

but there was no real daily contact.
-Hold it in front of the camera! Show it. Why not?

Tell them what it is then? If you... It's Eric Saades autograph. For real.

-A situation would not look like this, she would not have the chance to say no.

This is a much more individualistic style of parenting than...

-Than the 1600's? I would just have taken...
-No, well

-For real!
-She would have been afraid of you.

-Oh you don't have to Diana. But the point Fredrik is trying to make is that

in the 1600's, you wouldn't have dared fuss around like this.

-No, but in the 1600's! But now, now you don't have to! You don't have to!

-No but imagine that you're a child who sees your parents very rarely,

your parents are more like Eric Saade is to her, something mythical you want to take part of.

So this opportunity when you're asking her to perform a task, that would be a chance for her

to spend some time with you, and she'd be very keen to do so.

-And now, what is it like now`
-Now she's taking you for granted,

she knows you wont go to war in Wästfalen for three years and not be around.

She's counting on you being here tomorrow too.

-My head hurts a lot. Like really a lot.
-It will pass on Monday.

Today is the last day, and we're going to town to do something typical for the 17th century nobility:

Drink beer and spend money.

-DRIVE!

-A noble man could not have too many parties, too many castles, bowties on their shoes

no matter if your numbers were in the red or not.

Back then, as now, it was a matter of identity. A noble man who didn't lead that lifestyle

was no noble man. Now me and Erik will look over our finances.

THE LUXURY TRAP
1600's EDITION

-Do you think you know where you are, budget wise?

-Yeah, no, yes, ehm, no, well... No, it's not something we think about much, no.

-Can't say I understand the question.
-Accomodation. How much does it

cost to live here every month?
-There is no rent, but just the upkeep on

a place like this, that is a lot, that is 7000 dalers, just for maintenance.

-Let's get it up here.
-We have a really large house, yeah!

-Yes, and that costs money. Food then, what do you have to say about that?

-Food is very important to us. We think food is allowed to be expensive.

That's a thing, one of the things, that we want to spend money on.

-Clothes, this is where I start getting really concerned. I've looked over your

accounts, and it's like five beaver hats from England just this month.

Who needs five new beaver hats?
-He does!

-People who see those hats, they shit their pants out of jealousy!

-You're bringing yourselves down, don't you get it? It's time to be serious about this.

One of the toughest categories to me are "fireworks and hair".

-And then it came. The Reduction. To save Swedens economy after the

expensive wars, the king forces the nobility to hand over our goods and lands to the state.

We who owned almost two thirds of Sweden, now barely own one third. Fucking socialists!

-This is 45 thousand dalers every month. How much do you bring in?

-What is your income? Where is the money coming from?!

-You're putting out 45 000, where are they coming in?

-I... I think I speak for both Lotta and me when I say that you boys have done a great job.

And that we would like to give something back to you. So how about

becoming our guests for say, 14 days? And we have a big party?

And let me tell you, beaver hats to both of you! You did a great job!

-So, what do we do now? Well, we finish with a great feast!

-Today is probably the most difficult day, food wise, for Lotta and Erik and their guests

because today almost all food is cold. It's the same flavors, sweet and spicy.

And at this time for a banquet there was no time to serve the 15 dishes we are having

warm, as we would have today. This was prepared a couple of days before, little by little

and then you served it all cold.
This is a dish for later tonight, a piglet.

This is a capercaillie hen, plucked and baked whole in the oven.

The the feathers have been placed back on the wings of the bird, which was quite popular

during the age of Great Power. Sometimes you'd even put the bird carcass back into it's skin.

-A proper baroque dinner was supposed to be a bit like and orgie. Crowded with

fanfares and drama, surprises and heart attacks. Over 50 dishes could be served,

and people sat for hours.
-Ok, last steps for the second service...

-Hi! Are there lots of people up there?
-No, like six-seven people maybe.

-It is not only in Ivanhoe you would hire a jester. It also happened here,

in 17th century Sweden.
-Lotta wants to say hi! LOTTA! The jester is here!

-Magnus? Magnus Betnér?
-No, uhm, he couldnt make it.

-Oh, ok, why didn't you tell me?
-This is the other jester. I told you before.

But this guy is really funny!
-Yeah, so... I'll show you. It can be like...

me slipping, like that.
-We're looking forward to it a lot,

but we'll come back to get you, ok?
But stand here at the ready, yeah?

-Tonight we have invited opera singer Malena Ernman, historian Bo Eriksson,

and author Thomas Lappalainen. They won't know what hit them because they

are here to be all dazed by our status and grandiose lifestyle.

FISH ASPIC

MEAT GALLERY
-So, first serving

DOVE PIE
aspics and pies.

FROG PIE
-I'll start then? -Yes, go ahead.

-Would you look at that.
-What what is? A trickery?

-It's supposed to be fun, I think. You're supposed to be surprised! Like an ice breaker.

-A meal should be like a show, other entertainment was scarce at this time.

Food should therefore be filled with all the fun you could imagine.

-The brown one tastes a bit like dog food smells.

-The salmon is relatively normal, flavor wise. The way salmon usually tastes.

-It should also be said that it is very cold. Ice cold.

-And not much salt or pepper.
-Can we get a little jingle?

-Cheers.
-Urban, it sounds like you're playing

the first part of "Helan går". What is the story behind that?

-"Helan går" came from when you had fanfares for every drink, and later grew to become

a song with lyrics.

-Hey listen, we've had som issues with the starter, we're moving you up

an hour, hour and a half or so. That's ok, right?
-Yeah!

-The department of dead, cold animals, full size.

WHOLE ROASTED PIGLET
-The piglet was roasted in the oven.

CROOKED PIKE
Boiled pike biting its own tail.

WHOLE ROASTED CAPERCAILLIE
-And the wild bird steak,

a capercaillie hen in this case.
-It tastes a bit sweet and salty and... musty.

-It smells like old scab.
-Yes, the flavor is not very important,

that is not the the thang, so to say.
-But what is the thing, then?

Is etiquette important?
-Yes. We're eating with knives, forks and spoons

No, no, you're doing great Erik! Finally someone with proper manners.

Because in the 1600's, this breaking point, the fork not an individual thing for eating.

You ate most likely with your hands, and the fork was placed by the dish.

You used it to take food from the serving dish to your plate. It got quite messy,

so the question is, what to you do with your greasy fingers?

-Well... you...
-No, you do not lick your fingers. Proper

etiquette says the thing you may not use is this, this is off limits.

You used bread. That's why there were bread next to you. So you wiped your fingers

on the bread like that.
-Listen, this is really silly,

but we're having such a great time up there so we've decided to cut you out all together.

But thanks. Thanks so much for coming. Really cool. We'll call you!

Because it did sound like a lot of your things were really funny.

-Dessert!

-A golden cake....
CAKE WITH GOLD LEAF

MARSIPAN FRUIT

SPICY WINE SOUP

SNOW MUSH WITH ROSEWATER
-Well I think this golden cake gave this

evening a golden finish! Tasted like cold. Sponge cake with a bit extra.

-Today I've had a pretty bad headache actually, I think it's because I'm not

allowed to drink coffee. Or because you drink a lot less when all you are allowed

to drink is beer. So today I've been suffering. Not a lot, but a little.

Because of the headache. So I have been given som painkillers. It feels a bit like cheating.

After having wallraffed with my body as a tool for a week I must say I thrived surprisingly

well in the 1600's. Drinking this much beer, for example, has not felt bad to me.

It's felt very natural to me. And the food was different, but not inedible in any way.

And this whole thing with wearing a wig felt, oddly enough, extra manly.

Overall I liked the whole think with wearing purple clothes, swords and bowties.

It is like this is an era of extra everything. And then the whole thing with not washing yourself,

that has not bothered me at all. I feel free! I feel more like a deer.

-First I thought that the 1600's was disgusting. It is difficult to only eat animals and

intestines all the time. Or only porridge and peas. But after a while

it was almost a bit nice to follow a template for how to act, and to think

"I had a nice enough life, or bad, because God intended it that way."

And now I'm thinking that our own era might be just as strange, we're just so used to it

we fail to see it.