Neil Hilborn - "OCD" (Rustbelt 2013)
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0:08 - 0:11The first time i saw her
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0:11 - 0:13everything in my head went quiet.
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0:13 - 0:16All the tics, all the constantly refreshing images
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0:16 - 0:16just
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0:16 - 0:18disappeared.
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0:18 - 0:19When you have Obsessive Compulsive Disorder
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0:19 - 0:22you don't really get quiet moments.
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0:22 - 0:23Even in bed, i'm thinking
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0:23 - 0:25"did i lock the door yet? did i wash my hands yet? did i lock the door yet? did i wash my hands yet?
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0:25 - 0:26But when i saw her,
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0:26 - 0:29the only thing i could think about
was the hairpin curve of her lips -
0:29 - 0:34or the eyelash on her cheek, the eyelash on her cheek,
the eyelash on her cheek. -
0:34 - 0:36i knew i had to talk to her.
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0:36 - 0:40i asked her out 6 times in 30 seconds.
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0:40 - 0:41She said yes after the 3rd one,
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0:41 - 0:43but none of them felt right
so i had to keep going. -
0:43 - 0:46On our first date i spent ore time
organizing my meal by color -
0:46 - 0:50than i did eating or talking to her.
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0:50 - 0:52But she loved it.
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0:52 - 0:55She loved that I had to kiss her goodbye 16 times or 24 times because it was Wednesday.
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0:55 - 1:00She loved that it took me forever to walk home because there are lots of cracks on our sidewalk.
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1:00 - 1:02When we moved in together, she said she felt safe,
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1:02 - 1:09like, no one would ever rob us
because I definitely locked the door 18 times. -
1:09 - 1:13I'd always watch her mouth when she talked when she talked when she talked when she talked when she talked.
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1:13 - 1:15When she said she loved me,
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1:15 - 1:16her mouth would curl up at the edges.
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1:16 - 1:18At night she'd lay in bed
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1:18 - 1:22and watch me turn on the lights off & on & off & on & off & on & off & on & off & on & off & on & off.
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1:22 - 1:27She closed her eyes, and imagined the days and nights were just passing in front of her.
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1:27 - 1:32Some mornings, I'd start kissing her goodbye but she'd just leave cause I was making her late from work.
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1:32 - 1:36When i stopped at a crack in the sidewalk,
she just kept walking. -
1:36 - 1:39When she said she loved me, her mouth was a straight line.
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1:39 - 1:41She told me I was taking up too much of her time.
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1:41 - 1:44Last week she started sleeping at her mother's place.
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1:44 - 1:46She told me that she shouldn't have let me
get so attached to her, -
1:46 - 1:48that this whole thing was a mistake,
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1:48 - 1:52but how can it be a mistake that I don't have to wash my hands after I touch her.
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1:52 - 1:54Love is not a mistake.
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1:54 - 1:57It's killing me that she can run away from this
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1:57 - 1:58and I just can't.
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1:58 - 1:59I can't go out and find someone new,
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1:59 - 2:02because I always think of her.
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2:02 - 2:03Usually, when I obsess over things,
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2:03 - 2:06I see germs sneaking into my skin,
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2:06 - 2:08I see myself crushed by an endless procession of cars...
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2:08 - 2:13and she was the first beautiful thing I've ever got stuck on.
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2:13 - 2:17I want to wake up every morning
thinking about the way she holds her steering wheel, -
2:17 - 2:19how she turns shower knobs like she's opening a safe,
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2:19 - 2:26how she blows out candles, blows out candles, blows out candles, blows out candles, blows out candles, blows out candles, blows out
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2:26 - 2:28[ stamps foot ]
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2:28 - 2:31Now, I just think about who else is kissing her.
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2:31 - 2:34I can't breathe, cause he only kisses her once...
he doesn't care if it's perfect. -
2:34 - 2:37I want her back, so bad.
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2:38 - 2:41I leave the door unlocked,
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2:41 - 2:44I leave the lights on.
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2:44 - 2:45[ applause ]
- Title:
- Neil Hilborn - "OCD" (Rustbelt 2013)
- Description:
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Neil Hilborn, performing during Individual Finals at the 2013 Rustbelt Regional Poetry Slam. Clean subtitles.
- Video Language:
- English
- Team:
- Captions Requested
- Duration:
- 02:52
Kevin Hall edited English subtitles for Neil Hilborn - "OCD" (Rustbelt 2013) | ||
terrys2 edited English subtitles for Neil Hilborn - "OCD" (Rustbelt 2013) | ||
Radical Access Mapping Project edited English subtitles for Neil Hilborn - "OCD" (Rustbelt 2013) |