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[Ridgewood--Queens]
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["New York Close Up"]
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["Jamian Juliano-Villani Gets to Work"]
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It's a very simple routine:
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I come in,
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reheat my coffee,
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go on the computer, look at stuff,
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clean my brushes,
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and then I get to work.
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I've not had time off since I started,
which is crazy.
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Once you have a deadline
it's like impending doom.
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It's like a pimp!
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Constantly, like you owe someone something.
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Stress assassinates creativity.
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If you make a bad painting
in your job as an artist,
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it's like the worst.
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It's mortifying.
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It's like having chocolate all over your face
or something--
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and you're going to some gala.
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You're only as good as your last painting--
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which sucks--
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but, you know, it's kind of the truth.
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I was growing up in the middle of nowhere,
New Jersey,
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and I just wanted to get out of New Jersey
and get to New York immediately.
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New York is where it seemed like all
the artists went to be artists.
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["Painters Painting"]
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I was watching "Painters Painting"--
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Stella and Rauschenberg
and blah blah blah,
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and they're all in New York, you know--
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sitting on ladders, covered in paint.
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For me, as a teenager, it was amazing.
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"That's..."
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"That's it!"
You know?
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Now, I romanticize it less
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because coming to New York
and starting to be in the art world thing--
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it's insane!
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I've had a million shitty jobs.
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Overnight shift diner waitress.
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I worked at a group home.
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Taught gymnastics.
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Kindergarten teacher.
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I organized books for a marine
who was obsessed with ships.
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I was commuting back and forth
from working at a restaurant in New Jersey
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so I could get my first apartment in New York.
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I was basically painting on top of my bed,
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staying up every other night to paint.
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Slowly, I got a slightly bigger room--
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and then I got a slightly bigger room.
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Three years ago,
I actually got my first real studio ever.
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That was like Christmas, every day.
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--Terrible.
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The paintings, I think, are...
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They're tricky.
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You need to make them better,
make them weirder,
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make them smarter,
make them dumber.
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You just paint a snowman
in the desert...
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That's it? Really?
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Like, there's no other step, you know?
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It's like some stupid one-liner?
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I have a sense of humor
and a really light way to approach something.
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Just come up with a joke,
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and then from there,
how can you offset that
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so it's like
psychological or personal?
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It's like ping pong,
back and forth, back and forth,
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until it's just
all these things going like this,
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negating itself.
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A lot of weird decisions just happen here
by myself
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in the middle of the night.
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But also a lot of it is talking to other people.
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If you have all these different voices
coming in,
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it's less of a one-person lecture.
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[Ajay Kurian, Artist]
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Across the hall is Ajay,
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who is an amazing artist.
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Man, he saved my ass so many times
with so many shows.
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"Uh, can you give me a minute
and we could like, um..."
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"You could just give me moral support please? Thanks."
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--I'm thinking like a very very, super light,
pale teal kind of colors.
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--Blue, or very very pale purple.
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--Purple is probably better?
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--Like cool purple.
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[KURIAN]
--Like lavender, or?
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[JULIANO-VILLANI]
--Cool ass purple.
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[KURIAN]
--I could see that.
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[JULIANO-VILLANI]
--Right.
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--Or like a...
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[KURIAN]
--Is that a vase or a mirror?
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[JULIANO-VILLANI]
--Who the fuck knows?
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--It will be a mirror.
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[KURIAN]
--Okay.
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[JULIANO-VILLANI]
--Hmm...
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--Fuck.
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One of my friends was telling me,
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"Just put some crap in there,
no one can tell."
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I was like, "Thanks, jerk!"
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[Inhales sharply]
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But I can definitely tell.
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Because these are supposed to be confident.
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I just turned 30.
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I mean, I chainsmoke--
like, you know, a pack and a half a day.
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I drink a lot.
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My sleeping habits are terrible.
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I eat garbage.
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This is just a vessel,
you know what I mean?
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Past couple of years, I had so much stamina
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and just kept on working and pumping.
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And now, it's like, when it actually matters,
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I got to make sure I still have it.
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I think the main pressure is
maintaining integrity
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and making work that you feel good about--
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even under pressure,
which is really difficult.
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I really want to push the paintings--
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and I don't know how yet,
but hopefully I'll figure it out
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and make them something
that they aren't yet.
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I know I'm going to make some, like,
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embarrassing, bad sculptures
or videos or something.
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But, like, fuck it,
I got to do it,
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now is the time--
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while I have the energy.