Advice for Empaths, Teal Swan with Host Amanda Flaker
-
Not SyncedAmanda: In terms of this interview what I wanted to do is just…
-
Not SyncedWell, I told you how I talked to my empath group about our conversation
-
Not Syncedwhere you were talking about when you were in China and the guy that you
-
Not Syncedworked with said to breathe in people’s energy.
-
Not SyncedThat’s a really interesting way of putting it. I’ve
-
Not Syncednever heard it put that way, and quite explicitly.
-
Not SyncedAnd some people were really triggered by that idea.
-
Not SyncedSo, I thought it would be awesome to have you talk more
-
Not Syncedspecifically about what that is.
-
Not SyncedTeal: Hell yeah. Let’s just jump right into it. I love it.
-
Not SyncedAmanda: And I have a lot of good questions for you too.
-
Not SyncedTeal: Fuck yeah!
-
Not SyncedAmanda: So you know that, first of all, one of the things we talk
-
Not Syncedabout in my group is the difference between an empath needing protection
-
Not Syncedand having discernment. And also one of the videos I did said that empaths
-
Not Syncedneed healing, not protection. How important it is to heal the emotional body.
-
Not SyncedAnd there’s certain things that we go over a lot. I work with so many empaths.
-
Not SyncedIt seems like there’s almost a glorification of unhealthy dynamics with empaths.
-
Not SyncedThat kind of perpetual martyr syndrome and perpetual victim syndrome.
-
Not SyncedAnd this “Oh, I’m so sensitive and everybody comes to me and I have to protect myself”.
-
Not SyncedIt just seems like a lot of empaths are really unhealthy and I think
-
Not Syncedthat is simply because we haven’t healed.
-
Not SyncedAnyway, so yeah, I know you and I have talked about this a lot.
-
Not SyncedBut I want to hear what your opinion is, not just opinion, your experience
-
Not Syncedwith being highly sensitive, with being empathic. You obviously went through
-
Not Synceda lot and have had to learn how to thrive. And be empowered as an empath,
-
Not Syncednot just be protected.
-
Not SyncedTeal: So, just start off? giggles
-
Not SyncedAmanda: Start off.
-
Not SyncedTeal: I think that, first, what needs to be said is that I’ve never met
-
Not Syncedan empath in my life that doesn’t suffer from serious boundary issues.
-
Not SyncedSo the real issue with us is not the empathicness, in and of itself.
-
Not SyncedIt’s the fact that we have serious problems with a sense of self.
-
Not SyncedSo, first we should be talking about what healthy boundaries are.
-
Not SyncedBut I think our major issue that we have is that we take this gift
-
Not Syncedand we assume that it has to come with the package of all these
-
Not Syncedunhealthy things, right?
-
Not SyncedAmanda: Right.
-
Not SyncedTeal: When it really, honestly doesn’t. It could be argued that
-
Not Syncedpart of what gets people to the place where they are even
-
Not Syncedempathic in the first place might be having poor boundaries
-
Not Syncedbecause of the family dynamic that they were in when they were
-
Not Syncedyounger. So, for example, a little girl says, “I don’t wan’t to do that.”
-
Not SyncedAnd mom says, “Oh, come on. Be nice now.” And so she learns to tear
-
Not Synceddown her separations. She learns to tear down her definition of
-
Not Syncedof what is true for her, or what’s right for her versus what is
-
Not Syncedright or true for other people. And that enables her to sense
-
Not Syncedwhat everybody else is feeling because they don’t sense the
-
Not Synceddifference between themselves and other people.
-
Not SyncedSo, that could be one of those contrasting experiences that we
-
Not Syncedopt into so we can develop this empathic behavior. But at the same time
-
Not Syncedit’s like our evolution is to develop to maintain that connection
-
Not Syncedwith people where the lines are blurred and we perceive oneness
-
Not Syncedmore so than other people, but simultaneously where we’re able to
-
Not Syncedhave a separate sense of self. Sort of like, this is where I
-
Not Syncedbegin and end. So, a lot of the issues with what to do to keep
-
Not Syncedourselves in a state of integrity as empaths has to do with
-
Not Syncedthis fact that we have no idea what a healthy boundary is.
-
Not SyncedWe think of boundaries like fences because what boundary we know.
-
Not SyncedAnd fences are really designed to keep other people out.
-
Not SyncedWhat I’d like to explain to people is that is not what a boundary is.
-
Not SyncedA boundary doesn’t really have anything to do with other people.
-
Not SyncedIt has to do with your sense of self.
-
Not SyncedIt’s almost like saying, “This is what’s true for me. This is what I like
-
Not Syncedand don’t want and don’t like. These are my emotions. This is what I am feeling.”
-
Not SyncedSo we have to have a sense of that and that’s how we know where we start
-
Not Syncedand where we end. We’re playing in this third dimension where we have this
-
Not Syncedillusion basically of separateness and it’s benefiting us to have this
-
Not Syncedillusion of separateness right now. and as long as we know it’s an
-
Not Syncedillusion, which we don’t have to help empaths with that aspect
-
Not Syncedbecause we know it’s an illusion. But we have to help empaths to feel
-
Not Syncedsafe to engage in that illusion sometimes. So, rather than a boundary
-
Not Syncedmeaning “This is what I’m going to let you do and not do to me”.
-
Not SyncedA boundary is about what I say “yes” to relative to myself.
-
Not SyncedSo, when you’re thinking about other people encroaching on you
-
Not SyncedI can say “no” to you, or I can say “yes” to me.
-
Not SyncedSo, sometimes saying “no” to you is saying “yes” to me.
-
Not SyncedWhere as other times me saying “no” to you is just that.
-
Not SyncedAmanda: Right
-
Not SyncedTeal: It’s me resisting you. And that’s going to do nothing, but
-
Not Syncedbring it closer, which is the number one argument empaths
-
Not Syncedprotecting themselves is that it is not possible to focus on
-
Not Syncedresisting something, which is what you’re doing when you’re
-
Not Synced“protecting yourself”. It’s like a shield. When I bring up
-
Not Synceda shield I am protecting myself, which means I am resisting
-
Not Syncedsomething that is coming at me. So you can’t focus at the
-
Not Syncedidea of protection while simultaneously creating the idea
-
Not Syncedof something that you need to protect yourself against.
-
Not SyncedAmanda: Exactly. So I’ve talked about this a lot, and one of the
-
Not Syncedbiggest things I always get people saying back to me, especially
-
Not Syncedpeople who are empathic and have other extra-sensory abilities as well,
-
Not Syncedis that the psychic realm is real and psychic attack is real and there’s
-
Not Synceda lot of really dangerous things out there. And to tell someone that they
-
Not Synceddon’t need to protect themselves is like giving them no armor against what
-
Not Syncedcould potentially be incredibly dangerous for them.
-
Not SyncedSo what would you say, especially in those sort of realms like the psychic
-
Not Syncedrealm, what would you say to that?
-
Not SyncedTeal: I would state that it is very dangerous to engage in those types of thoughts.
-
Not SyncedAs an empath you are more acutely aware of the oneness that exists, but the
-
Not Syncedmoment that you say you have to protect yourself against something you’re
-
Not Syncedignoring the fact that the aspect that you’re mirroring is actually yourself.
-
Not SyncedBasically we could concern ourselves all day long with trying to fix the
-
Not Syncedreflection in the mirror, or we could try to fix whatever it is that is
-
Not Syncedcausing the reflection. So, when empaths are trying to say I want to protect
-
Not Syncedmyself against all of these psychic attacks they’re essentially stepping in
-
Not Syncedfront of a mirror and seeing that they’re a match to feeling like victims.
-
Not SyncedAnd then they’re trying to scrub the reflection clean without saying “Okay,
-
Not Syncedobviously for me to be a match to psychic attack…” I want you to think
-
Not Syncedabout it like this, like there’s two magnets. For psychic attack to actually work
-
Not Syncedone side of you can be engaged. So, let’s say that this is a demon.
-
Not SyncedLet’s just pretend. So, a demon basically is trying to get into you or
-
Not Syncedanother person’s energy is trying to get into you. It can’t actually
-
Not Syncedmake the connection unless this side, kind of like a negative aspect
-
Not Syncedof the magnet is magnetized to the degree that it goes like this…
-
Not Syncedslaps hands together
-
Not SyncedAmanda: Right.
-
Not SyncedTeal: It does not matter what anyone is focusing at you in this reality unless you are
-
Not Synceda match to it.
-
Not SyncedAmanda: Exactly
-
Not SyncedTeal: So really the question is, “Why am I a match to all these things coming
-
Not Syncedat me in such an extreme way?” And this is why the practice of completely
-
Not Syncedopening yourself up to these energies is so powerful. Because when you do that
-
Not Syncedyou’re acknowledging to some degree that you are welcoming of it.
-
Not SyncedSo you’re not resisting it anymore. And we realize that in this reality
-
Not Syncedthat anything that we resist persists, right?
-
Not SyncedSo, if I resist that demon coming at me I am now focusing on that
-
Not Synceddemon coming at me and I am making myself a match to it.
-
Not SyncedIf in that moment, a demon is coming at me and I open myself up.
-
Not SyncedAnd I’m actually able to do this. This is not like something that
-
Not SyncedI’m not wanting to do. So let’s say that I am actually able
-
Not Syncedto open myself up and saying, “I welcome and receive you as my teacher”.
-
Not SyncedI have a complete… like my polarity basically is not negative/positive.
-
Not SyncedIt can’t connect, right?
-
Not SyncedAmanda: Right.
-
Not SyncedTeal: I have just given them a vibration that they are not a match to.
-
Not SyncedAmanda: Right.
-
Not SyncedTeal: So if anything wants to attack me… This is like a really, really ancient
-
Not Syncedphilosophy which even the martial artists understand, which is that I am
-
Not Syncedable to completely open myself up to the bullet it cannot go off.
-
Not SyncedI am now bending the space-time reality because I made myself a
-
Not Syncednon-match to the experience. So what I am calling empaths to do,
-
Not Syncedwhich was the major changing point in my life is that I am calling
-
Not Syncedempaths to create a vibration of such magnitude that they are able to
-
Not Syncedbe an ocean that absorbs everything that everything is diluted in.
-
Not SyncedWe as empaths, our issue is that we visualize ourselves because of
-
Not Syncedour poor boundaries as very, very small and very weak. And everyone’s
-
Not Syncedintruding on us. If we could come into this space where we’re saying,
-
Not Synced“You know what? Maybe I was given this ability for a reason. Maybe
-
Not SyncedI am capable of transmuting everyone’s vibrations.”
-
Not SyncedWe are actually switching to a frequency that is so high that we can’t
-
Not Syncedbecome a match to experiencing the attack.
-
Not SyncedI’m like the perfect, prime example of this.
-
Not SyncedI am not the person that came up with this idea regardless of understanding
-
Not Syncedthe way that the universe works. I was the person who was at 17, 18, 19,
-
Not Synced“I can’t go outside without my hoodie on because even that’s just too much
-
Not Syncedenergy coming in towards me. I’m not cut out for this world.”
-
Not SyncedThis is what most empaths are like, right? “I’m too sensitive.
-
Not SyncedAnd this world is not, so maybe I’m not meant to be here.”
-
Not SyncedAmanda: Mm-hmm
-
Not SyncedTeal: So when I went to China originally this guy was watching me and
-
Not Syncedsaid this makes no sense. You have to understand that whenever you walk
-
Not Syncedinto a room with that vibration you are match to things like it.
-
Not SyncedAnd I didn’t understand the correlation until he made me do it.
-
Not SyncedHe said, “See right now, you’re cowering as this person is walking towards you.
-
Not SyncedDo you feel the energy of that and what that might be a match to?”
-
Not SyncedSo then he takes me to this train station and he says, “Stop doing that!
-
Not SyncedWhen people walk in I want you to think about yourself being big enough with
-
Not Syncedenough magnitude of breathing all of these energies in.”
-
Not SyncedAnd I did, and I expected the worst, right?
-
Not SyncedBut I am in a place as an empath, which most of us are, which is like,
-
Not Synced“You know it’s really not worth living this way anyway. So, why not? If I
-
Not Syncedget annihilated by this practice, it’s just going to be what I was
-
Not Syncedplanning on doing to myself anyway.” So I go and I breath it in and
-
Not Syncedafter a few breaths I realized, “Oh my God, nothing’s happening to me right now
-
Not Syncedbecause of this.” Because I had this open attitude there’s nothing really
-
Not Syncedfor these energies to hit against. So you’re not feeling the impact.
-
Not SyncedAnd that like shifted absolutely everything in my life. I was able to
-
Not Syncedgo out into public. I stopped wearing hoods. Y’know, it was just amazing.
-
Not SyncedAnd I really realize that anytime that you’re engaging in this idea of
-
Not Syncedprotection are you buying into the illusions of self-other, right?
-
Not SyncedAmanda: Right. Yep.
-
Not SyncedTeal: You’re really also making yourself a match to attack.
-
Not SyncedAmanda: Exactly. So what about… I know you’ve said there’s still days that
-
Not Syncedyou feel more vulnerable than others. And what do you do? Do you have any practices
-
Not Syncedor things that you do? What I would call discernment, if you know your vibration
-
Not Syncedis low for example, do you do certain things to make sure you’re not in situations
-
Not Syncedthat make you more vulnerable?
-
Not SyncedTeal: Oh yeah. Hell yeah. See, this is the difference. The difference is once
-
Not Syncedyou’re conscious of yourself being a match to it, it’s not about the other thing.
-
Not SyncedActually, I just figured out why we did this. Okay.
-
Not SyncedAmanda: laughs
-
Not SyncedTeal: So the day before Halloween, and I have a very hard time because of
-
Not Syncedmy childhood on Halloween. So I understand that just because that date is coming
-
Not Syncedup and that I have body memory because of that date I’m already in a
-
Not Syncedlower kind of vibration. And so I went over to this friend’s house and
-
Not Syncedbasically we made this trip through the woods, and I had this moment.
-
Not SyncedSo she basically told me, “There’s this tree that is by my house that has
-
Not Syncedbones that are tied up in the tree.” Now that triggered me… instantly, right?
-
Not SyncedIt’s not something the friend was doing to hurt me, but that triggered
-
Not Syncedme because of my associations with bones being tied in trees has to do with my
-
Not Syncedchildhood. So at that moment I had a choice. This is about poor boundaries
-
Not Syncedversus good boundaries. The self-loving version of Teal could have said,
-
Not Synced“I don’t really want to go on a walk by that tree.” Now because I am
-
Not Syncedtypical of a poor boundary empath I was thinking, “Well, I don’t want to
-
Not Syncedmake this friend upset. I’m just going to go on the walk anyways.”
-
Not SyncedSo, I go on the walk and sure enough I’m in a low vibration the entire
-
Not Syncedtime I’m on that walk. Later that night I ended up being a match to one
-
Not Syncedof the worst psychic attacks that I have experienced in years.
-
Not SyncedAmanda: WOW.
-
Not SyncedTeal: Yeah, like super bad. Basically I woke up and I was in complete sleep
-
Not Syncedparalysis and I was blended between the fourth and third dimension and
-
Not Syncedthere was this enormous leathery red… It was a demon-looking thing on top of me.
-
Not SyncedNow, PANIC, FREAK OUT. Stand up. Smudged the entire house with Paulo Santo and I’m
-
Not Syncedlike, “What the hell is it about this that is destroying my reality. Maybe I
-
Not Syncedcan’t hang out with that friend anymore. Maybe she’s psychic attacking me, right?”
-
Not SyncedAnd I’d go into the typical thing that we do. Now, I sat down after calming
-
Not Syncedmyself down and decided to do what I can do, which is to see what happened
-
Not Syncedon a conscious level so it’s not happening in dream time and sleep time
-
Not Syncedwhen we’re in between. And what I discovered was quite interesting. The place that
-
Not Syncedwe were walking actually made me a match to this thought-form which was created
-
Not Syncedhere in Park City by the people who used to be miners here. So, the story
-
Not Syncedgoes like this… There was a miner that came into Prospect and it used to be that
-
Not Syncedthey would pay a certain amount to go to a certain place and be able to dig
-
Not Syncedthere for a certain amount of days. Now, the place this guy wanted to dig
-
Not Syncedwas given to another Prospector and he basically thought that was a personal
-
Not Syncedvendetta. So he got really angry about that personal vendetta and he ended
-
Not Syncedup going there and killed the guy very brutally and then he moved the
-
Not Syncedbody, and in the process this body bled out, basically. So, it had no more
-
Not Syncedblood in it. And so when he moved it to this place and then left it and he skipped
-
Not Syncedtown, the people that then found the body and saw that it was bloodless and had
-
Not Syncedslash marks on his neck they basically thought, because a lot of them came from
-
Not Syncedthe east coast, that this has to be like the Jersey Devil.
-
Not SyncedThey thought there was one of these things in Park City. So it becomes a belief
-
Not Syncedin the group of people who were living here that every inexplicable thing that
-
Not Syncedwas blamed on this Park City version of the Jersey Devil. But if you understand
-
Not Syncedthought-form, people who believe in something enough, they can actually create
-
Not Synceda multi-dimensional thought-form which is what they thought it was. And that
-
Not Syncedwas what I picked up on my hike because of being in that victim vibration.
-
Not SyncedSo, I helped it to cross over and all this other stuff. I explained to it that
-
Not Syncedthey don’t believe in you anymore. You don’t have to exist anymore, so that’s
-
Not Synceddone. The reason I am telling you this story is because it would be very easy
-
Not Syncedto say that I need to protect myself because there are all these things that
-
Not Syncedare going to attack me. What it really is, is recognizing that I was already triggered
-
Not Syncedprior to going out, which is what made me a match to that experience. It was
-
Not Syncedthat connection of the magnet. So it’s about, “What do I do next time?”
-
Not SyncedOkay, if I feel that feeling of “This is not right for me”, I get to honor that.
-
Not SyncedAnd so like, really the majority… I have a lot of practice which I could talk to
-
Not Syncedyou about. But the number one thing for me and for all empaths is to realize
-
Not Syncedhow to freaking honor our feelings, which WE DON’T DO.
-
Not SyncedAmanda: Exactly. I know for me that’s one of the number one reasons whenever I
-
Not Syncedhave become a match to something that is like that. Or I’m extremely triggered
-
Not Syncedand then I feel like a victim or something happens in that way, or I get
-
Not Syncedpsychically attacked it’s because of that exact thing. I haven’t
-
Not Syncedhonored my feelings and honored what I knew I was told or what I felt.
-
Not SyncedAnd actually you helped me a lot. A few months ago I remember I had sent you a text
-
Not Syncedbecause I was feeling psychically attacked and that never happens to me. Like I’ve
-
Not Syncednever really had that happen, but a particular person I was working with was
-
Not Syncedpretty mentally disturbed. I had triggered this person somehow and I could feel
-
Not Syncedthe… It almost felt like a penetration on my third-eye. Very intense. And I could always
-
Not Syncedrecognize this person’s energy signature. And I know these things, but I remember
-
Not Syncedtexting you because it was so overwhelming and so shocking. And I had never
-
Not Syncedexperienced that before. And you kind of gave me some suggestions with essential
-
Not Syncedoils, but the main thing you said was to do a lot of inner-child work around
-
Not Syncedfeeling victimized. And I spent about three days just recognizing what that
-
Not Syncedfeeling was, when the first times was that I felt this way, going within, and asking my
-
Not Syncedinner-child what she needed. And realizing as I honored that and I went to her and did
-
Not Syncednot make it about the other person at all, and then it complete went away and I
-
Not Syncedhave not felt it since.
-
Not SyncedTeal: Yep.
-
Not SyncedAmanda: And it also makes you feel empowered because you realize that it isn’t
-
Not Syncedsomething out of your control. This is within me. I can go in and I can deal with
-
Not Syncedit, rather than it being something scary out there that you have no control over.
-
Not SyncedTeal: Exactly. Which is what we have to get away from as empaths because we
-
Not Syncedrun the risk more than any other type of person of falling into that trap 100%.
-
Not SyncedSo, I have to be very careful with my vibration. That is what I have decided about
-
Not Syncedmyself over the years through a lot of trial and error. Basically, because you’re
-
Not Syncedan empath you run the risk of this ability going super, super south on you and
-
Not Syncedattracting only bad feeling things, right? And that is not an objective picture of
-
Not Syncedreality. We have to understand that. As empaths the objective picture of reality
-
Not Syncedis that we should be feeling equally as much as bad, if not more good than bad,
-
Not Syncedbecause more good actually does exist in this universe. So, if that’s not the case
-
Not Syncedthat means we have a vibration which makes us only a match to seething things
-
Not Syncedwhich are negative. So I have to watch it with my vibration from the get-go.
-
Not SyncedThat means the minute I wake up in the morning I have my positive aspects journal.
-
Not SyncedNow this thing has been like a God-send for me because it makes me a vibrational
-
Not Syncedmatch to these things I write down. Now this might sound like a really super
-
Not Syncedkind of trite self-help technique, but the reality is if you are going to acknowledge
-
Not Syncedthat we live in a Universe that is governed by Law of Attraction, whatever vibration
-
Not SyncedI get into dictates what I am a match to. So when I wake up in the morning I will
-
Not Syncedtake this out and write an entire page about things that I feel good about right now,
-
Not Syncedor today. I have to focus on anything that causes me to feel emotionally good.
-
Not SyncedThat is how I start my day. Now that ensures, basically, that I’ve started a snowball
-
Not Syncedof attraction in my life where I wake up and my day starts going good. So, when
-
Not Syncedpeople come to me for help, it’s not like people who come to me don’t come with
-
Not Syncednegative things. What it is is that I’m more a match to seeing the solutions
-
Not Syncedthen I am a match to seeing the problems. The problems are something I’m aware
-
Not Syncedof, but it’s not something that becomes mine. Make sense?
-
Not SyncedAmanda: Right.
-
Not SyncedTeal: So I’m able to hold a much higher frequency for people who come to see me
-
Not Syncedthen I would otherwise have been. And I do this exercise when I wake up and when
-
Not SyncedI go to sleep. So, that’s one example. All empaths basically have to take the bull
-
Not Syncedby the horns of their own vibration. It’s not about what I’m allowing you to do or
-
Not Syncednot do. It’s about what I am doing to ensure that I am good and okay. And that’s
-
Not Syncedgoing to be different for every single one of us. It’s like a lot of us that are
-
Not Syncedempaths really need to learn to be divas. And being a diva is not about what I am
-
Not Syncedtelling you to do or not to do around me, right? It’s more about me honoring what
-
Not SyncedI need. So if I am sort of convinced that it is a diva thing that I have to take a
-
Not Syncedbath in salt every single morning, then that is what I have to do.
-
Not SyncedAmanda: Right laughs
-
Not SyncedTeal: So, we have to start experimenting with how good it feels and how less you need
-
Not Syncedto protect yourself when you really set things up from the get-go. That means that
-
Not Syncedyou develop relationships with people who are completely open from the beginning.
-
Not SyncedSo when any issue comes up you expose it completely. You and I were
-
Not Syncedpracticing this a little bit before you left California. You remember how we were
-
Not Syncedsitting down and I was telling you about this reception process where
-
Not Syncedit feels really good for empaths to explain to each other what the motive for
-
Not Synceddoing things is, both the shadow aspects and the positive aspects. That enables us
-
Not Syncedto feel safer right? So maybe that’s something that you need and that is in alignment
-
Not Syncedwith your own personal boundaries in your relationships. So let’s say you, Amanda, gave
-
Not Syncedme a present and I ask you why you gave me this present. And then the practice in our
-
Not Syncedrelationship is you saying the full truth about why you did that. Maybe one part is
-
Not Syncedmaybe you really like to see me happy or maybe the other part is that you feel guilty
-
Not Syncedthat you didn’t respond to my phone call.
-
Not SyncedAmanda: It just keeps everything in the open. And when someone is honest from the
-
Not Syncedget-go about even the shadow side of what their motives are it makes it so that there
-
Not Syncedisn’t any hidden agenda or something that is going to come up unexpectedly.
-
Not SyncedTeal: Completely. So not to be totally weird and plug stuff in here, but I do
-
Not Syncedactually have a really good resource for people who really want to understand
-
Not Syncedabout boundaries and start figuring out their own boundaries and conceptualizing
-
Not Syncedwhat the hell that even means. I did a YouTube video that is called something like
-
Not Synced“How to Have Healthy Boundaries”. Maybe if you go to YouTube and you type in
-
Not Synced“Teal Swan Healthy Boundaries” and it may come up that way. I explain what boundaries
-
Not Syncedare and questions you can ask yourself that help you to develop your own boundaries.
-
Not SyncedAnd I explain something in that video that is super crucial, which I want to repeat
-
Not Syncedhere for people who are empathic, which is that you can get really complicated
-
Not Syncedwith all types of boundaries. religious boundaries, spiritual boundaries, personal
-
Not Syncedboundaries, relationship boundaries, whatever they are, right? But you can sum
-
Not Syncedthem all up in this way… You always know what your boundaries are based on how
-
Not Syncedyou feel. So I’m watching this program and I know that this just causes a
-
Not Syncedcontraction in me and I realize I don’t like watching this movie. That is a
-
Not Syncedpersonal boundary. And so you will basically the most important thing that you can
-
Not Syncedpossibly do is care how you feel more than anything else.
-
Not SyncedAmanda: Which is why I think there is a correlation at least in the empaths
-
Not Syncedthat I’ve worked with. I would say 95% of them have come from an abusive background
-
Not Syncedand childhood. People argue that empathic abilities are something you’re born with
-
Not Syncedand it doesn’t matter if you were abused. But I do think that you can be trained
-
Not Syncedfrom children to, I know with me it’s kind of a preemptive thing that if I can
-
Not Syncedread everyone around me then I can prepare for whatever might happen or get out
-
Not Syncedof any situation which might be uncomfortable. And so we’re basically from a young
-
Not Syncedage trained out of paying attention to how we feel and trained instead to tune into
-
Not Syncedthe environment around us.
-
Not SyncedTeal: Perfect. Could not have said that better if I tried.
-
Not SyncedAmanda: laughs
-
Not SyncedTeal: Because that is exactly the case with empaths. And empaths do not want
-
Not Syncedto see themselves in that light most often so they’d rather just think that this
-
Not Syncedis just a god-given gift that makes them feel like they are in a state of
-
Not SyncedMartyrdom for the rest of their lives. But that’s not the reality. The reality
-
Not Syncedis let’s keep the baby and throw out the bath water. The bath water is a lot of
-
Not Syncedus developed these abilities because we had seriously dangerous people we had to
-
Not Syncedread before they hurt us, or we were surrounded by people who wouldn’t love us
-
Not Syncedunless we honored their boundaries and not ours. So it’s like once we acknowledge
-
Not Syncedthat we are going to be able to get rid of the negative aspects of this, and keep
-
Not Syncedthe positive aspects of this. Which is really what we are all looking to do.
-
Not SyncedI don’t really want people to turn themselves off to it. I hate that too when people
-
Not Syncedask me, “Can you switch it off?” like it’s some sort of virtue.
-
Not SyncedAmanda: When you read things about empaths it almost makes it sound like either you
-
Not Syncedhave some special god-given gift that sets you apart from other people, or, you’re
-
Not Synceddefective and you need to learn how to turn it off. And I could never resonate
-
Not Syncedwith anything, not that I’ve explored everyone that talks about empaths, but things
-
Not Syncedthat have come into my awareness usually haven’t been very helpful. So, it’s one
-
Not Syncedof the things that I really resonated with you when we talked about it and how
-
Not Syncedimportant it is to really just connected with how you feel. And one of the things that
-
Not SyncedI think… There’s been a lot of talk about Light Workers and the believing that
-
Not Syncedthere is a spiritual hierarchy and the light versus dark and that whole battle.
-
Not SyncedAnd I think that empaths really get sucked into that especially if we’ve come
-
Not Syncedfrom a background of abuse we so badly want to feel like we have value.
-
Not SyncedAnd to feel like, “Oh, we can be important. We can be important to someone. We can
-
Not Syncedbe on the Light Worker’s side. We can fight evil and all of the people that hurt us.”
-
Not SyncedIt kind of drums up that kind of same aggressor/victim/savior mentality. And that
-
Not Syncedis a cycle we’ve been in for so long and I think when we really get out of that and
-
Not Syncedwe take 100% responsibility for how we feel, and what happened to us, and our
-
Not Syncedvibration, we get out of that whole cycle. And we realize we are the aggressor,
-
Not Syncedwe are the victim, we are the savior. You know, we don’t have to facilitate those
-
Not Syncedroles.
-
Not SyncedTeal: Oh, I love that. At my last workshop I had the Christians up on stage and
-
Not Syncedwe had a really good little conflict argument thing happened when I was trying to
-
Not Syncedexplain to him that Jesus and The Devil are the same person. Which is 100% true.
-
Not SyncedThe higher you progress through the spiritual levels you realize that regardless
-
Not Syncedif you are coming from this angle or that angle, it is all trying to get you to
-
Not Syncedthe same place, which is your own truth.
-
Not SyncedAmanda: Exactly. So would you say that really learning to thrive and be empowered
-
Not Syncedwith being sensitive is similar to doing shadow integration.
-
Not SyncedTeal: Yes. Hell yes. I think it’s a one-two step that we’re missing basically.
-
Not SyncedSo when we have these negative aspects arise rather than trying to escape from it
-
Not Syncedby trying to do whatever makes us feel positive instantly. Whenever that thing
-
Not Syncedarises and I’ve already got the negative up, we go into that and we learn from it
-
Not Syncedbecause it has extremely valuable information to share with you. And you also
-
Not Syncedrealize that the majority of these painful things that keep coming up for you is
-
Not Syncedin fact wounded children that are still way back stuck in the past. You’re
-
Not Syncedlike a skipping CD that just can’t move forward. So when you assist those
-
Not Syncedaspects of yourself back into an integrated state where you’re bringing them into
-
Not Syncedyourself and you’re accepting that there is no resistance to those states and
-
Not Syncedinstantly your vibration is like a buoy that was brought under water and instantly
-
Not Syncedjust boils back to the surface. And then the one-two step is, first we’re doing
-
Not Syncedthat, and second we feel the relief and association with actually allowing
-
Not Syncedyourself to feel how you feel and explore how you feel to the negative.
-
Not SyncedOnce you feel the relief that’s your indication that you can begin creating
-
Not Syncedyour reality. That’s the stuff most people already know how to do because
-
Not Syncedthere’s enough teachers to sink a ship that are teaching that. Stuff like
-
Not Syncedpositive aspect journals, affirmations. That’s the point to use that. We
-
Not Synceddon’t want to use that stuff to get away from the negative aspects that we
-
Not Syncedfeel. Because those are essentially hurt aspects of ourselves. Okay, classic
-
Not Syncedempath issue is Number One: Self-Abandonment. So, self-abandonment… We can
-
Not Syncedconceptualize of what that means, of course. Self-abandonment is like a great
-
Not Syncedmany things. At the primal level, self-abandonment occurs when we try to escape
-
Not Syncedhow we feel. When you’re triggered and you don’t feel good and you don’t feel
-
Not Syncedsignificant. That’s actually an indication that there’s an unhealed aspect
-
Not Syncedof yourself stuck in a childhood version of you that is basically a three
-
Not Syncedyear old you that is basically crying and making you feel insignificant in
-
Not Syncedreal time. So by you trying to skip out and saying, “Focus on the happy place.
-
Not SyncedFocus on the happy place.” You are basically trying to escape from a three year
-
Not Syncedold child. It’s not that you’re like so powerful that you can finally face the demons
-
Not Syncedbecause you do realize that most of these demons are like tiny children
-
Not Syncedthat are begging you to pick them up out of the damn crib. And once you do that
-
Not Syncedyou develop the understanding that it’s not scary anymore. These things are like
-
Not Syncedghosts that are projected through frightened children. And then you develop
-
Not Syncedthis loving vibration towards yourself. So when you start to feel this way you
-
Not Synceddon’t instantly abandon yourself by going in the opposite direction of how you
-
Not Syncedactually feel and the truth of yourself right now. And that’s like a major step
-
Not Syncedwhen it comes to developing boundaries.
-
Not SyncedAmanda: Exactly. And there’s something incredibly empowering about as an empath is
-
Not Syncedmaking sure to check in constantly with how I feel. And then I connect with it.
-
Not SyncedAnd I say, “That’s okay. It’s okay.” I will no longer abandon myself is how
-
Not SyncedI feel.
-
Not SyncedTeal: We’re doing a quote right now which all empaths need to, like, keep this.
-
Not SyncedPut it deep in your cerebellum, okay? The quote is, “The problem is not how you
-
Not Syncedfeel. The problem is that you do not feel safe to feel how you feel.”
-
Not SyncedAmanda: Exactly. Yep. Exactly. And when you open that and allow yourself to
-
Not Syncedfeel what you feel and make it safe for yourself, at least in my experience,
-
Not Syncedthat has changed everything. I’ve had more growth in the last year when I made
-
Not Syncedthe commitment that I will no longer abandon myself and how I feel. I’ve had
-
Not Syncedmore growth with this than eight years of therapy prior to that.
-
Not SyncedTeal: I feel like we also need to let ourselves go in graduated steps so we need
-
Not Syncedto be okay with what is. And that means being super honest with ourselves. I
-
Not Syncedwatch a lot of empaths that feel a psychic attack from somebody, and they feel
-
Not Syncedthat negative energy. They instantly go to a place either where they make an
-
Not Syncedenemy of that person or they say “No, I can completely love and accept where they are
-
Not Syncedright now”, and that’s lying to yourself. “I’m not right there. Maybe I hate her
-
Not Syncedfor that. I hate that she’s doing that to me right now.” That’s a valid feeling
-
Not Syncedthat we need to be able to admit to because unless we’re able to admit to that and
-
Not Syncedget angry about it move through that with ourselves, we’re never going to get to the
-
Not Syncedhigh enlightened place where we are able to say, “I can completely understand why
-
Not Syncedshe did that.” And really mean it. And not like we’re saying it because it’s some sort
-
Not Syncedof spiritual clothing that we have put on to really hide the way that we feel.
-
Not SyncedAmanda: Exactly. Well, and I think that, again that it goes back to the whole
-
Not SyncedLight Worker mentality. it tends to breed that type of… You cut off a huge part
-
Not Syncedof your emotional field. There’s some emotions that are acceptable and a lot of them
-
Not Syncedthat are not, so you only play in the ones that are “acceptable”, but you’re really
-
Not Syncedjust denying what you feel. You’re suppressing.
-
Not SyncedTeal: Which is just the exact same thing that happened to us when we were children.
-
Not SyncedWe weren’t allowed to feel how we felt. There were some emotions that were acceptable.
-
Not SyncedSo much were unacceptable and so we did whatever we could to deny and suppress the
-
Not Syncedaspects that were unsavory to the everyone else around us. Yeah, it’s a self-fulfilling
-
Not Syncedcycle with empaths. We’re like doomed because of these abilities we developed/gifts
-
Not Syncedunless we really take the bull by the horns of this situation we are doomed to repeat
-
Not Syncedthe relationship we had with our parents with the Universe, itself. We just project
-
Not Syncedthat relationship over the top of the Universe. And it’s a painful… super painful
-
Not Syncedlife.
-
Not SyncedAmanda: So this is what I’m really interested in. I’m interested in what the life
-
Not Syncedof an empowered empath looks like. Because what I think what is being an empathic person
-
Not Syncedor being highly sensitive can feel like a superpower if you know how to utilize emotions.
-
Not SyncedTeal: I would say that the life of an enlightened empath, like someone who is really
-
Not Syncedin am empowered state is what your archetypal vision of someone like Jesus is.
-
Not SyncedAnd I know some people have a resistance to him. If that’s not what you like, think
-
Not Syncedabout Buddha. The reason I’m using the example of Jesus is because, not only is it
-
Not Syncedrelatable to most people in the western world, but there are these images… these really
-
Not Syncedclassic images of him where he is able to walk in and kneel down at the foot of all of
-
Not Syncedthese leppers. And not only be able to completely understand where they are and how
-
Not Syncedthey feel, and because of that, say whatever the perfect thing to say to get them
-
Not Syncedinto a higher vibration. He also has absolutely no fear. The highest version of an
-
Not Syncedempath is a person who is absolutely fearless to anything. That is a person who can go
-
Not Syncedinto a place that is completely destroyed by leprosy and has absolutely no attack
-
Not Syncedor fear that he will come down or become sick with that disease.
-
Not SyncedAmanda: WOW. I love that.
-
Not SyncedTeal: Now try this on for size, and this is where a lot of people are going to be able
-
Not Syncedto feel the out-of-alignmentness with protection. What would Jesus feel like to walk in
-
Not Syncedthere who had himself covered in Hazmat material to work with people who had Leprosy.
-
Not SyncedThat is what we’re doing when we try to protect ourselves from people, as empaths.
-
Not SyncedAmanda: WOW. That’s a really good visual.
-
Not SyncedTeal: What Jesus did was to create a vibration, himself that was so high and so strong
-
Not Syncedthat it was not a match to the very conditions that he was assisting with. Because
-
Not Syncedwhen he walks into the room and instead of seeing everything that is wrong, and
-
Not Syncedworrying about that coming onto him, he saw what was right about them and helped
-
Not Syncedpeople line up with that. Look, you’re eternal beings. Look, you are not sinners.
-
Not SyncedLook, you’re always eternal and beautiful in the eyes of God. To express that
-
Not Syncedmessage helps that person in that low vibration to match that higher vibrations,
-
Not Syncedwhich is why he was able to perform the miracles he was able to perform.
-
Not SyncedAmanda: I know what the classic bible versions say, but what do you think he
-
Not Syncedinnately knew about himself that allowed him to do that?
-
Not SyncedTeal: I think he knew, back then, what all these new age teachers are now starting
-
Not Syncedto teach thousands of years after the fact. See, if you understand that language it
-
Not Syncedgets very complicated because a lot of the translations lost the virtual message.
-
Not SyncedFor example, in the culture he was first living in and in that language the very
-
Not Syncedword “son” means “creation”. So the problems there is that we have interpreted what
-
Not Syncedhe was saying as “I am the literal, only son of God” when in reality that very word
-
Not Syncedcould have meant “I am the creation of God, therefore I am not separate from God”.
-
Not SyncedWhich is the same damn thing everybody is saying nowadays in the new age, which is
-
Not Syncedyou are an extension of God and as such you are an eternal creator, which is why
-
Not Syncedyou can turn water into wine. So, I feel like what was really going on with him was
-
Not Syncedthat he had mastered this concept within the Universe, same as Buddha, that you are
-
Not Syncedabsolutely indivisible from his thing that you keep praying to, and because of that
-
Not Syncedthe amount of power that you have, and this is not power you have over other people,
-
Not Syncedthis is power of what your life looks like. This is that you cannot be a victim to
-
Not Syncedany person, or any condition. And love is the absolute truth of your existence.
-
Not SyncedThat love is God and therefore God is you. And if you’ve tapped into that you’ve
-
Not Syncedtapped into everything you need to know about yourself. That’s what I think.
-
Not SyncedAmanda: I love it. Yeah, I think you’re dead on. It definitely resonates.
-
Not SyncedTeal: Jesus was an empath. If you want me to tell you, if you look at all of these
-
Not Syncedarchetypal figures throughout history who have these extra-sensory abilities, if you
-
Not Syncedwant to find the cardinal empath, it was him. Buddha was more the clairvoyant.
-
Not SyncedJesus was the empath.
-
Not SyncedAmanda: I’ve never really thought about it like that. Yeah, it’s very true. So is
-
Not Syncedthere anything else that you want to cover on this topic of being empathic?
-
Not SyncedTeal: Just that I feel like that those of us that are empaths really need to learn
-
Not Syncedhow to step into our power and quit forgetting that we have it. And the reality is
-
Not Syncedregardless of whether you developed these abilities because of some negative
-
Not Syncedcircumstance in your childhood or not, it is still a gift and a skill that you
-
Not Synceddeveloped. And if you have a gift or skill, that probably means that you’re
-
Not Syncedmeant to use them. And if you have a gift like that you probably have the capability
-
Not Syncedof doing exactly what I described, where you walk into a circumstance absolutely
-
Not Syncedunafraid of what is going to come at you because you know that your heart can contain it.
-
Not SyncedAmanda: I love that. Super powerful stuff. It’s so encouraging to hear people speak
-
Not Syncedabout empaths from an empowering point of view, rather than “Oh, protect yourself.
-
Not SyncedYou’re vulnerable.”
-
Not SyncedTeal: Well, does that feel in alignment? I mean, we need to ask ourselves
-
Not Syncedeven about that. Does that feel like it’s true?
-
Not SyncedAmanda: Right. It doesn’t. It doesn’t feel like it’s true. Yeah. Well, I’m so happy
-
Not Syncedthat we were able to talk about this. I know that we were going to do this in person,
-
Not Syncedbut then our schedules kind of mixed up. But thank you so much for doing this. I
-
Not Syncedthink this is going to be really good. I’ll share it publicly as well. I’ll put it
-
Not Syncedin my group, and you can share it if you want to because I feel it will speak
-
Not Syncedto a lot of people.
-
Not SyncedTeal: Yeah, I think so too. I think there are a hell of a lot of empaths who need a
-
Not Syncedhell of a lot of help on how to live. And it would be fun sometime to do a
-
Not Syncedworkshop, I think, because obviously this is just the skin surface.
-
Not SyncedAmanda: Exactly.
-
Not SyncedTeal: Whereas I feel like we need to develop ways, y’know, like actual, tangible ways
-
Not Syncedthat we as empaths can feel that empowerment in our environment. I would like to
-
Not Syncedactually do workshops where we had examples of how to approach people of what an
-
Not Syncedempath would normally do, which is probably out of alignment with what we do instead,
-
Not Syncedwhich help us to come into alignment.
-
Not SyncedAmanda: I love that. I mean, it’s so needed. I just started my group online, my group
-
Not Syncedon Facebook. I’ve had so many sign up for that group and so many people sign up for
-
Not Syncedmy class. So many people are desperate for something different. Not just how
-
Not Syncedto protect yourself, but “How can we be empowered?” How can we come into
-
Not Syncedalignment? I love your example of Jesus. How can we walk into situations fearlessly?
-
Not SyncedI think we should totally do a workshop. I think it would be huge.
-
Not SyncedTeal: I’ll do it.
-
Not SyncedAmanda: Let’s do it.
-
Not SyncedTeal and Amanda: laughing
-
Not Synced-End Closed Caption Transcript-
- Title:
- Advice for Empaths, Teal Swan with Host Amanda Flaker
- Description:
-
In this interview Teal shares her experience learning to cope/thrive with her empathic abilities and offers advice to other empaths on how to feel empowered and fearless with their sensitivities.
To join the "Empowering Empathic Abilities" online support group click here: https://www.facebook.com/groups/15103...To find out more about my "Empowering Empathic Abilities" online class, click here: http://chakracenter.org/2014/10/11/em...
For more about Teal Swan visit www.tealswan.com
For more about Amanda visit www.chakracenter.org
- Video Language:
- English
- Duration:
- 40:49
![]() |
ariasoul edited English subtitles for Advice for Empaths, Teal Swan with Host Amanda Flaker | |
![]() |
Teal Swan edited English subtitles for Advice for Empaths, Teal Swan with Host Amanda Flaker |