George Carlin - "Proud parents" bumper stickers

Alright, here's another pack of

low grade morons who ought to be

locked into portable toilets and set on fire.

These people with bumper stickers that say,

"We are the proud parents of an

honor student at the Franklin school."

Ya know, for the Midvale academy or

whatever innocent sounding name has

been assigned to the indoctrination center

where their child has been sent to be stripped

of his individuality and turned
into an obedient

dead soul conformist
member of the American

consumer culture.

Proud parents, what kind of empty people

need to validate themselves through the

achievements of their children?

How would you like to live with a couple

of these misfits.

"How's that science project
coming along Justin?"

"Fuck you dad.

You simple minded prick.

Mind your own buisiness and
pass me the Cheerios."

Here's a bumber stick I'd like to see.

"We are the proud parents of a child

whos self esteem is sufficient that he

doesn't need us promoting his minor

scholastic achievements on
the back of our car."

That would really feel good.

Or,"We are the proud parents of a child

who has resisted his teachers
attempts to break his spirit

and bend him to the will
of his corporate masters."

Just be a nice little change ya know?

Here's something realistic,"We have a

daughter in public schools that hasn't been

knocked up yet."

"We have a son in public schools that hasn't

shot any of his classmates yet. But he

does sell drugs to your honor students.

Plus he knocked up your daughter."

Then there are the people who aren't

too proud of their children.

"We are the embarrased parents of a

cross eyed little knit whit who at the age

of 10 not only continues to wet the bed

but also shits on the school bus."

Something like that on the back of a car

might give the child a little more incentive.

Ya know?

Get him to try a little harder next semester.

Captioned by Danyoul