Hypersexuality as a Result of Abuse | Kati Morton

Hey, everybody. Happy Thursday. Now

today's video is on a topic that we

haven't discussed in years. And that topic

is hypersexuality as a result of

childhood sexual abuse or sexual assault.

And the question I got was, "Hey, Katie, I

was raped as a child and as a consequence

I'm hypersexual. You've discussed how

painful and hard it can be to have a

healthy sex life after being sexually

abused but you haven't talked about how

else one might react, such as, being

overly sexual. It would be interesting to

see what you think about it. I feel we're

a minority and it's not talked about much.

I may be wrong but since it's not

something widely discussed, I wouldn't

know. It's something that I struggle with

daily and has gotten me into many

dangerous situations, so I'm curious to

know." And the first thing that I want to

say is, that the truth about childhood

sexual abuse or sexual assault at any age.

The most common response is actually to be

hypersexual and so I just want to put that

out there, that you are not in the

minority, you're actually in the majority.

So, know that you're not alone. And I know

a lot of you out there watching this video

who haven't gone through this are

thinking doesn't that, isn't that like the

opposite. Isn't that counterintuitive? Why

would someone who was harmed sexually as

a child or at some point in their life,

then turn around and be hypersexual. Why

would they do that? Why would they hurt

themselves with the very thing that hurt

them in beginning? And there are many

reasons that we do it. The first, is that

it's a way to regain control, to take it

back. Many of my clients have told me

that they will be hypersexual, they'll

put themselves into dangerous sexual

situations because it's their way of

saying "It's my body, I decide. I do what

I want." And it's almost like they get to

reverse the role. Instead of feeling like

someone has control over them and can do

whatever they want to them and even

saying no isn't stopping it. They get to

choose and they get to have as much sex as

they want. The second reason many people

become hypersexualized, is validation.

Imagine if we were sexually abused as

children. We were raised in that

environment. Thorugh that time in our

formative years. We were shown that maybe

the only way we got one on one attention

was with sex. Maybe the only time we were

really told that we were loved was through

sex. Maybe that's how we knew we were

worthwhile and we were important. And all

of those things. Maybe that was something

we were told while we were being sexually

abused. So you can see, how if that's what

happening in our formative years, even

into our teens. We will associate love,

support, validation with sex. Therefore in

order to get what we all need, right, we

all need love, validation and support. We

will then turn to sex to fill that need.

And if you're new to my channel, don't

forget to subscribe and make sure you

click that bell icon on my homepage so

that you get notified. I've heard from a

lot of you, that you're being made aware

of the videos when I put them up. So

clicking that bell and turning on your

notifications should change that. But the

third reason that I know of, in my

experience is chemical dependency. And

that sounds like we're talking about

addiction and we kind of are. Sex can

release those feel good hormones. You know

how I've talked about different chemicals

in our brain, like dopamine and

norepinephrine. And all those things that

swirl around and make us feel really good.

Sex releases those. Therefore, if we've

been hypersexualized we're already maybe

used to being abused and being sexualized

for many night, maybe every night growing

up. When we get older we still seek out

that same feeling and that's why when you

talk about treatment for this, the next

stage then is, like, dual treatment. We

need to treat potentially the addiction

and that like yearning for that feel good,

that dopamine, that serotonin, that

norepinephrine that gets released. We may

seek that out, so we need to deal with the

addiction, the sex addiction. And

secondly we have to heal from our trauma

and you I did those videos with Alexa,

where we talked about trauma therapy and

EMDR. And all the different ways that you

can heal from a trauma. And as always

leave in the comments your own experience.

I'm just sharing what I know and those are

only three reasons that I'm aware of.

Maybe they're others that I'm forgetting.

Please let us know. And if you want more

videos about this and you like this kind

of content, like I said we haven't talked

about it in maybe years. Then give us a

thumbs up and let me know as well. And

I hope that you found this helpful, I hope

this is healing and lets you know that you

are not in the minority. You are instead

in the majority and things can and will

get better. And I will see you next time.

Bye!