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Hey, everybody. Happy Thursday. Now

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today's video is on a topic that we

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haven't discussed in years. And that topic

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is hypersexuality as a result of

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childhood sexual abuse or sexual assault.

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And the question I got was, "Hey, Katie, I

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was raped as a child and as a consequence

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I'm hypersexual. You've discussed how

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painful and hard it can be to have a

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healthy sex life after being sexually

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abused but you haven't talked about how

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else one might react, such as, being

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overly sexual. It would be interesting to

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see what you think about it. I feel we're

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a minority and it's not talked about much.

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I may be wrong but since it's not

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something widely discussed, I wouldn't

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know. It's something that I struggle with

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daily and has gotten me into many

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dangerous situations, so I'm curious to

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know." And the first thing that I want to

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say is, that the truth about childhood

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sexual abuse or sexual assault at any age.

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The most common response is actually to be

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hypersexual and so I just want to put that

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out there, that you are not in the

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minority, you're actually in the majority.

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So, know that you're not alone. And I know

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a lot of you out there watching this video

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who haven't gone through this are

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thinking doesn't that, isn't that like the

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opposite. Isn't that counterintuitive? Why

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would someone who was harmed sexually as

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a child or at some point in their life,

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then turn around and be hypersexual. Why

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would they do that? Why would they hurt

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themselves with the very thing that hurt

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them in beginning? And there are many

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reasons that we do it. The first, is that

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it's a way to regain control, to take it

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back. Many of my clients have told me

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that they will be hypersexual, they'll

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put themselves into dangerous sexual

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situations because it's their way of

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saying "It's my body, I decide. I do what

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I want." And it's almost like they get to

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reverse the role. Instead of feeling like

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someone has control over them and can do

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whatever they want to them and even

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saying no isn't stopping it. They get to

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choose and they get to have as much sex as

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they want. The second reason many people

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become hypersexualized, is validation.

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Imagine if we were sexually abused as

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children. We were raised in that

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environment. Thorugh that time in our

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formative years. We were shown that maybe

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the only way we got one on one attention

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was with sex. Maybe the only time we were

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really told that we were loved was through

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sex. Maybe that's how we knew we were

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worthwhile and we were important. And all

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of those things. Maybe that was something

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we were told while we were being sexually

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abused. So you can see, how if that's what

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happening in our formative years, even

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into our teens. We will associate love,

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support, validation with sex. Therefore in

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order to get what we all need, right, we

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all need love, validation and support. We

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will then turn to sex to fill that need.

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And if you're new to my channel, don't

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forget to subscribe and make sure you

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click that bell icon on my homepage so

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that you get notified. I've heard from a

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lot of you, that you're being made aware

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of the videos when I put them up. So

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clicking that bell and turning on your

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notifications should change that. But the

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third reason that I know of, in my

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experience is chemical dependency. And

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that sounds like we're talking about

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addiction and we kind of are. Sex can

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release those feel good hormones. You know

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how I've talked about different chemicals

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in our brain, like dopamine and

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norepinephrine. And all those things that

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swirl around and make us feel really good.

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Sex releases those. Therefore, if we've

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been hypersexualized we're already maybe

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used to being abused and being sexualized

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for many night, maybe every night growing

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up. When we get older we still seek out

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that same feeling and that's why when you

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talk about treatment for this, the next

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stage then is, like, dual treatment. We

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need to treat potentially the addiction

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and that like yearning for that feel good,

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that dopamine, that serotonin, that

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norepinephrine that gets released. We may

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seek that out, so we need to deal with the

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addiction, the sex addiction. And

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secondly we have to heal from our trauma

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and you I did those videos with Alexa,

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where we talked about trauma therapy and

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EMDR. And all the different ways that you

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can heal from a trauma. And as always

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leave in the comments your own experience.

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I'm just sharing what I know and those are

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only three reasons that I'm aware of.

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Maybe they're others that I'm forgetting.

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Please let us know. And if you want more

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videos about this and you like this kind

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of content, like I said we haven't talked

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about it in maybe years. Then give us a

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thumbs up and let me know as well. And

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I hope that you found this helpful, I hope

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this is healing and lets you know that you

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are not in the minority. You are instead

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in the majority and things can and will

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get better. And I will see you next time.

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Bye!