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Hello the internet ! Today we are going to make a vegan
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version of a Turducken , or as it's also known
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a Tofucken
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So lets get started
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A Turducken is a chicken stuffed inside a duck , stuffed inside a turkey
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which is probably the grossest shit I've ever heard of
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usually eaten by simple douchebags
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Now our Tofucken will start with some lovely tempeh
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Chopped up small , sauteed in olive oil with a little black pepper
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Mmmm , then we add a little soy sauce
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Next we'll stuff our tofu block with this lovely sauteed tempeh
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next we take that beautiful block of tofu
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we place it in our favorite marinade
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[ sigh] a little on the top
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This is gunna be the tits
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You know a perk of this recipe ?
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Is you don't have to eat body parts and shit
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Why , some of those cooking show twats
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they even smile as they stuff bread up a birds ass
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Isn't that fucking strange
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and after your tofu has soaked up that delicious goddamn
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marinade, then wrap it in your favorite home-made seitan
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I make my own seitan because
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I have no time for weak ass bullshit
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Then roast until its golden brown
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Isn't it nice to not be eating fucking corpses
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On today's farms , chickens , ducks and turkeys are totally fucked
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they're raised in tiny ass sheds and after
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a shitty life with ass hats beating the crap out of them
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they're fucking hung up side down
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their goddamn throats are cut at a slaughter house
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which is nothing more than a dickhead torture palace
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If shit like that was done to dogs everyday
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people would be like ' Jesus Fucking Christ '
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' you cock sucking , animal abusing
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So how are birds any fucking different ?
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In only the goddamn ways that count
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feeling pain and fear and shit
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bitch please ! You know eats like that ?
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weak ass motherfuckers , thats who
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So don't be a weak ass mother fucker
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Go Vegan
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I'm gunna eat the fuck outta this
