The Heather world | Heather Artinian | TEDxGeorgetown

Heather Artinian is a student at Georgetown majoring in government and minoring in justice and peace studies. Heather was the focus of an academy-award nominated documentary titled "Sound and Fury." The documentary focuses on her family and their struggle to make a decision whether to give her, five years old at the time, a cochlear implant that would enable her to hear. Heather will share her journey through life, learning how to speak and hear, attending hearing schools, and being part of the deaf culture and the hearing world.

This talk was given at a TEDx event using the TED conference format but independently organized by a local community. Learn more at https://www.ted.com/tedx

Hi Everyone!

Can you hear me well?

Yeah? Okay.

My name is Heather Artinian,

and I am really excited to be here
in front of you all today.

I want to start off with a question:

What world do you belong to?

Because that's a question
I get all the time.

And my answer is always:

"The Heather world."

(Laughter)

Today, I want to tell you
about how I got to the Heather World.

And I sincerely hope
that what I'm about to say today

will help you understand better

why you should build bridges
between the worlds of your own lives.

I was born profoundly deaf,

which means I could not hear
anything but an atomic bomb,

which would be useful,
I'm thankful for that.

Otherwise, I get a peaceful night's sleep
every night without fail,

which is awesome.

(Laughter)

My family is deaf, my parents are deaf;
they're also culturally deaf,

which means they communicate
using sign language.

They went to deaf schools.

They have deaf friends.

They are just totally
immersed in that world.

I have two younger deaf brothers
who are the same way.

But I also have hearing grandparents,

hearing uncles, deaf aunts, deaf cousins,

so my family is just a giant mix
of hearing and deafness,

which I love, it's my favorite
part of my family.

When I was five years old,

I was standing on a bridge,

and to my left were my deaf parents
and the deaf world.

And to my right

were my hearing grandparents
and the hearing world.

I was just five years old at the time,

and I desperately wanted
to be included in both worlds.

And that's how the controversy started.

[SOUND and FURY]

The documentary came about because I
decided that I wanted a cochlear implant,

which is a device that helps me hear.

And my deaf parents
and the deaf world were very critical

because they felt like I was saying that
the deaf world is not good enough for me,

that I was rejecting
my parent's whole life,

which was not the case.

But then, we got criticism
from the hearing world as well

because they looked at my parents saying,

"Why wouldn't you give your child
the opportunity to hear?"

Complicated question, right?

And that's how it started.

At the end of the movie,

after all the fighting,
my parents ultimately decided

that it was the best choice at the time
for me not to get the cochlear implant.

So, I was once before
in the middle of the bridge,

but now I was totally immersed
in the left side, the deaf world.

We moved to Maryland,
which is a huge deaf community

compared to where I was living
before in New York.

You went to the Blockbusters,
or restaurants, the grocery stores,

it was easy because they were
very aware of the deaf world.

They knew how to interact.

I remember being back home in New York,

where my parents would sit
in a restaurant.

It was such a struggle
just to order drinks.

There would be a lot
of "What"s, "Huh"s, pointing,

"Oh, no, no, no, I didn't order this."

But in Maryland,
the servers knew what to do.

My brothers and I went to deaf schools.

My parents were visibly happy.

But then, we lived there
for about three and a half years,

and my mom got really sick,

so we had to move back to New York.

And I became, like, I was put
in front of the hearing world again.

Kids on my block, they all spoke,
they all didn't sign,

and I remember looking at them
and I wanted to communicate with them.

I wanted to play with them.

I was nine years old at the time.

And for a while, I did not want
the cochlear implant.

I desperately wanted
to move back to Maryland,

move back to the comfort world
that I'd known my whole life.

But after a while,

and especially after my dad got passed
over for a promotion at work

because he was deaf
and could not communicate,

I realized I did not want that for myself.

I just didn't.

And I really wanted to be able
to communicate with just anybody.

So I decided, at 10 years old,
I was going to get the cochlear implant.

[SOUND and FURY 6 Years Later]

And my parents said okay.

My doctor told me that the results
I would get would be very minimal

because I was 10 years old,

and that was past
the language learning stage,

that I probably would not learn
how to speak or hear very well,

but I wanted to try.

Who knows, right?

Maybe it will work.

And I think that today, it did.

I've gotten better at hearing
and better at speaking.

Right from the beginning,
I went to a hearing school,

and I had no speech skills,
no listening skills.

People could not understand me.

They would just sit there
and nod like "Uh-huh,

I have no idea what you're saying."

(Laughter)

But that's okay.

And throughout that time,
I was still going to speech therapy.

Then I got to high school,

and I realized that my speech
and hearing was getting better.

People were starting to understand me,
and I was starting to understand them.

And I also played sports,
which was my way in

because people saw
past the hearing or the lack thereof.

They saw me and they thought
I was good at sports,

so they wanted to be my friend.

That was my first opportunity
that I saw to bridge gaps.

What I would do is I would go to school,
then would go to my clubs and activities.

Then I would go to my practice,
my second practice,

I would come home
at nine o'clock at night,

go straight to speech therapy,

and then after that,
I would do my homework.

And I did that every day
right up until I graduated.

It was a lot of work, a lot of dedication,
but I was willing to put in the work.

And I saw the results.

I did not do all this myself, you know.

I had a lot of help.

I had speech therapists
who put up with me every night.

I had interpreters in the classroom
who helped me when I couldn't understand.

I had a wonderful family
who supported me through all this.

When I was 16, my parents and my brothers
moved to Rochester, New York,

which has a large deaf community
just like Maryland.

I stayed behind, and I lived
with my grandparents

because that was the best decision
for me at the time,

because I wanted to keep on doing
what I had been doing all along:

going to speech and just building
the bridges with people.

And this is more pictures of my family.

You have my uncle, my aunt,
my wonderful grandparents,

and my other uncle and cousins.

Fast-forward to today,
I am a junior at Georgetown University.

I'm majoring in government,
minoring in justice and peace studies.

I'm at my dream school.

I have dreams of going to law school

and, hopefully, like everyone
else at Georgetown,

becoming a Supreme Court justice.

Who knows?

(Laughter) (Applause)

Maybe, maybe.

Thank you.

After high school, I realized one thing:
I didn't have to be in the hearing world;

I didn't have to be in the deaf world.

I could just stand in the middle
and be my own world,

the Heather World,

which is a mixture of all kinds
of experiences I've had -

being deaf, living in the hearing world,
having cochlear implants -

I have two now, by the way -
I forgot to mention,

which brings me to my idea:

I really strongly believe

[Grab the opportunity to bridge
the worlds within your own life.]

that we all should grab the opportunity
to bridge the worlds within our lives.

Whether your experiences are small or big,

you can do it.

I've learned through my experiences

that when people seem mean
or they seem standoffish,

it's not because they don't like you.

Most of the time it's because
they're scared and they don't understand.

All they see is the deaf,
and they don't see the Heather.

So, it's my job, and it's your job

to reach out and try to build
a bridge over that.

So what I'll do,
I'll introduce myself and say,

"Hey, I'm Heather. I'm deaf - I know.

But I have cochlear implants,
and we communicate just fine.

If you don't understand me,
I'm happy to repeat myself.

And trust me, my roommates
do it all the time."

(Laughter)

And, you'll see the difference.

People start realizing, "Oh, she's normal,
I can just have a conversation with her

like everyone else."

They become more comfortable,
which is the key:

people are uncomfortable
when they see new things.

And I think it's our job
as human beings to reach out.

And this idea can be applied
to a variety of different things:

race, gender, disability, politics,
access to education.

Reach out, and you'll be surprised.

I really believe that all of us
have experiences.

[Everyone can make an impact.]

Regardless of how big or small,
it will make an impact.

Just by me reaching out
to one other person about my deafness,

that person will probably become more
comfortable around other deaf people.

And those people will probably become
more comfortable around other things

because they've tried new things.

[We never know how our openness
will shape the lives of others.]

And I really feel like

once you bridge and you open yourself up,

you help them understand
why you're worth building a bridge over.

You are, we all are.

But when you open yourself up,

they understand,
and they will try most of the time.

I met my best friend

in high school.

And in middle school,
I was really shy.

I didn't reach out to anybody.

I would just stand in the corner
and say nothing.

But when I got my confidence in my speech,
I started reaching out to people.

And just by me reaching out
to this one person,

she's now studying sign language.

She's almost fluent,
studying speech pathology,

and she hopes to serve the deaf community
after just meeting me.

So you can do that too just by you
reaching out about your experiences.

You can make a change
in someone else's life.

But sometimes, people don't understand.

I remember talking to this one person,

and he would say to me,
"So, where are you from?"

I'd say, "Oh, I'm from New York."

He's like, "No, no, no, really,
where are you from?"

I'm like, "New York."

He's like, "No, no, no, no.
I hear the accent.

Where are you from?"

(Laughter)

And I was like "Oh, I'm deaf."

And they were like, "No way,
you're speaking right now.

Where are you from?"

I said, "Okay.

(Laughter)

You're right, I'm from Africa.

That's where I get my accent."

(Laughter)

So sometimes, it takes
more effort than you think.

But that's okay, that's okay.

(Laughter)

But other than that,
you will also get the negative reaction.

Building a bridge is not one sided.

You need the other person
to be willing to come to you.

And I've come across many situations

where people say to me, "Heather,
why even bother going to law school?

How are you even going
to communicate in the courtroom?"

Or I've had people laugh at me
and disregard my opinion

because they think I'm "deaf and dumb."

Or people would look at me

and all they'd see
is the cost of the interpreter.

But here's what I say to those people.

It's okay. Its part of human nature.

People will have their beliefs.

But what's important is the bridges
that you do make with people

will make up for those.

Those bridges that you make
will move society forward.

And as you build the bridges,
those numbers will grow.

And the numbers of those
who didn't believe in you

will grow smaller.

And I'm telling you,

when I get my diploma from law school,

I've kept a list of all the people
I'm going to email them my diplomas.

(Laughter)

And they will be sorry.

(Laughter)

They will be sorry.

This is an example of a bridge
I made in college.

My roommates are the best
people I've ever met.

And I would have never met them
if I didn't have the courage to reach out.

And that was just my little shout-out
to the most awesome people I know.

Shout out.

(Laughter)

So my conclusion is:

I'm standing in the middle of the bridge.

I'm understanding, really,

that I don't have to chose
what world I'm in.

I can be in the Heather World,

and so can you - you could have
your own world.

Who cares what anybody says?

I think that we all should reach out,
build bridges, be you,

ripple effects in the world.

And I think that you will be
very surprised

at what you will find
at the other end of the bridge.

So reach out, allow other people in,
try to understand different experiences,

allow others to understand yours.

No matter what your experiences are
positive or negative,

you will make an impact.

Thank you.

(Laughter)