Key & Peele: School Bully

School bullies don't just happen—they're made.

Why are you reading bitch?

Because I like to read and this is a really good book.

You are a really good bitch, bitch!

Why you gotta bother me, man?

Because...

I'm not doing very well at school,

I'm reading at a third grade level,

I really don't wanna get left back,

so when I see somebody reading for fun

it makes me feel that much more stupid,

and then I get mad!

I didn't know that.

Thanks so much for opening up to me.

Shut up queer!

I don't understand, I mean,

why you gotta go there?

I've been having sexual fantasies
about some of the other guys at school.

Give me that!

I'm afraid of these feelings
and what they might mean.

It's like because I hate myself so much

I gotta point that hate outward

towards you!

You understand this on such a deep level.

I don't understand shit!

Now I'm gonna punish you physically
for acknowledging my emotional problems.

No no wait, I was gonna say,

if you understand yourself so well

then maybe you should try working
on changing it.

Of course I wanna change it!

But it's the only defence mechanism I have

against deeper more terrifying problems

berried inside of me!

You are lucky my dad is here.

Get to the damn truck son,

I need to take you home and beat on you
because I hate myself

And you look like your mother who left me

And I'm gonna block out the guilt
I feel of mistreating you

with the river of vodka.

I'm gonna internalise that

and unknowingly transfer it
onto you tomorrow.

Coming reluctantly...