Dancing with the Stars Wants Sean Spicer - Monologue

Jimmy Fallon's monologue from Thursday, July 27.

Subscribe NOW to The Tonight Show Starring Jimmy Fallon: http://bit.ly/1nwT1aN

Watch The Tonight Show Starring Jimmy Fallon Weeknights 11:35/10:35c
Get more Jimmy Fallon:
Follow Jimmy: http://Twitter.com/JimmyFallon
Like Jimmy: https://Facebook.com/JimmyFallon

Get more The Tonight Show Starring Jimmy Fallon:
Follow The Tonight Show: http://Twitter.com/FallonTonight
Like The Tonight Show: https://Facebook.com/FallonTonight
The Tonight Show Tumblr: http://fallontonight.tumblr.com/

Get more NBC:
NBC YouTube: http://bit.ly/1dM1qBH
Like NBC: http://Facebook.com/NBC
Follow NBC: http://Twitter.com/NBC
NBC Tumblr: http://nbctv.tumblr.com/
NBC Google+: https://plus.google.com/+NBC/posts

The Tonight Show Starring Jimmy Fallon features hilarious highlights from the show including: comedy sketches, music parodies, celebrity interviews, ridiculous games, and, of course, Jimmy's Thank You Notes and hashtags! You'll also find behind the scenes videos and other great web exclusives.

Dancing with the Stars Wants Sean Spicer - Monologue
http://www.youtube.com/fallontonight

-Here's what people
are talking about.

I heard that
"Dancing With the Stars"

is reportedly trying to get

former White House
Press Secretary Sean Spicer

to be a contestant...

marking the first "Dancing
With the Stars" contestant

who's hit rock bottom
before he went on the show.

[ Laughter and applause ]

Yeah.

Spicer's not the only one
doing a reality show.

On the next episode of
"Undercover Boss,"

Vladimir Putin is gonna go work
at the White House.

-Really?

[ Laughter and applause ]

[ Russian accent ]
Hello.

I'm a tour guide here.

How are things at home?

[ Normal voice ]
You guys see this?

Trump's new communications
director Anthony Scaramucci

made news for comparing Trump's
attempt to repeal Obamacare

to Lincoln abolishing slavery.

In a related story,
Anthony Scaramucci

is now expected
to take Sean Spicer's spot

on "Dancing With the Stars."

[ Laughter and applause ]

What?

What did you say?

But get this,
it's rumored that Scaramucci

is fighting with White House
Chief of Staff Reince Priebus

because he wants his job.

And a photo went viral today

that shows them both
in the Oval Office.

It looks like things
are pretty tense.

Take look at this.

Ooh.

[ Light laughter ]

I can't tell whether
they're about to duel or kiss.

[ Laughter and applause ]

"Kiss me, you fool."

This is nice.

During yesterday's
White House press briefing,

Sarah Huckabee Sanders read
a letter from a 9-year-old boy

that was sent
to President Trump.

This is real.
Take a look at what it says.

"Dear President Trump,
my name is Dylan,

but everyone calls me Pickle."

[ Laughter ]

"I'm 9 years old, and you are
my favorite president.

I like you so much,
I had a birthday about you.

My cake was the shape
of your hat.

How old are you?

How big is the White House?

How much money do you have?

Your friend, Dylan."

Isn't that cute?

Well, Trump was so moved
by the letter

that actually he wrote one
in response.

Take a look at this.

Trump wrote, "Dear Dylan"...

[ Laughter ]

"My name is Donald,
but everybody calls me Pumpkin.

[ Laughter ]

We have so much in common.

I'm my favorite president, too.

To answer your questions,
I'm 71 years old,

the White House is huge,

and I'm so rich, I eat a cake
shaped like my hat every night.

Your friend, Pumpkin.

P.S., want to be
the new Attorney General?"

Isn't that nice?
Thoughtful.

-I don't know if he can be.

-That's very nice.

Hey, this is pretty big.

There's a lot of buzz about
Hillary Clinton's upcoming

memoir about the election.
-Oh.

-And she just unveiled
the title.

This is real.
It is called "What Happened."

[ Laughter ]

It turns out Hillary is also
releasing a children's book.

Take a look.

It's called "One Hat, Two Hat,
Red Hat, F That."

[ Laughter and applause ]

People are still talking about
the Republican health care bill.

Yesterday, on MSNBC,
Congressman Buddy Carter

defended Trump's Twitter attack

on a senator
who voted against it.

He used a pretty interesting
expression I'd never heard.

Listen to this.

-What do you think
about the president

going after Lisa Murkowski
for her "no" vote yesterday

on the motion to proceed?

-I think it's perfectly fair.

Let me tell you,
somebody needs to go over there

to that Senate and snatch a knot
in their ass.

[ Laughter ]

-"Snatch"?

Incidentally,
that's the only procedure

covered in the GOP healthcare
bill.

I just want to let you know.

That's snatched --
a snatched knot.

-Snatch a knot
from your posterior.

-Gonna get this knot snatched.
-Yeah.

Check this out.

I read that the owner
of a clown motel in Nevada

is looking to sell it.

The clown motel
is like any other motel,

except it only has
one parking spot.

[ Laughter and applause ]

♪♪♪♪

Hey, come on.
-[ Giggles maniacally ]

-It's a good, clean clown joke.

-It's a good clean joke
you can tell the kids!

-Yeah.
Come on.

Finally, I saw
that Anne Hathaway is in talks

to star in the upcoming
"Barbie" movie.

Yep, she'll have to say goodbye
to her brown hair for the role

while the actor playing Ken

will have to say goodbye
to something else.

We have a great show tonight.

Give it up for The Roots,
everybody.