"Stop Waiting, Start Living": Public Talk in NYC, 2015.09.12 (Sr. Jina and Br. Phap Dung)
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0:06 - 0:08Dear friends,
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0:08 - 0:14please enjoy your breathing one more
time as we listen to the sound of the bell -
0:15 - 0:22With the inbreath, just feel refreshed,
breathing in fresh oxygen -
0:23 - 0:27breathing out, letting go
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0:36 - 0:40[three sounds of the bell]
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1:42 - 1:49With all respect to our beloved teacher
Thay and to our other brothers -
1:49 - 1:54and sisters who are with us, and with
the sangha and our friends here -
1:56 - 1:58This is a happy moment
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1:58 - 2:05we are surrounded by all my brothers
and sisters here -
2:06 - 2:11my sister Dieu Nghiem next to me
and the sangha is gathered -
2:12 - 2:15and on behalf of our teacher, who is in
San Francisco -
2:17 - 2:20we thank you for coming to support the
sangha -
2:20 - 2:23and being here with us this evening
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2:26 - 2:32Our teacher's deepest wish has always been
to build a community -
2:32 - 2:34a beloved community
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2:34 - 2:39as he shared his conversation with Martin
Luther King -
2:40 - 2:47that's our teacher's deepest wish,
is to form a family, a spiritual family -
2:48 - 2:52and so, tonight, sitting here among my
brothers and sisters, -
2:53 - 2:59I think this is one of the few times where we manifest like this
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2:59 - 3:05to, in a way, continue our teacher
as he is not physically here -
3:07 - 3:11So we thank you for coming together
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3:11 - 3:19This is something our teacher always gets
nourished by, and so do we -
3:28 - 3:32Tonight we, my sister Dieu Nghiem, she's
my oldest sister -
3:33 - 3:42she's asked me to share first so I will,
I tried to get her to share for us -
3:42 - 3:44this is the first time we're doing this,
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3:47 - 3:50She was supposed to represent the Dharma
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3:50 - 3:53and I was supposed to represent the
humor, I guess -
3:55 - 3:58just to let you know that that's,
I guess, the intention -
4:02 - 4:08tonight, just being together already,
I think we know how powerful it is -
4:08 - 4:11when people gather with the same intention
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4:12 - 4:15To learn, to open up, to really touch
something deeper -
4:15 - 4:19than what we normally do outside
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4:20 - 4:23I think that's the truth that I'm feeling
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4:25 - 4:29This e vening, the talk we're supposed to
share, -
4:29 - 4:40the theme, “Stop waiting and start living”
is quite American -
4:45 - 4:48When I found out that's what it was,
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4:48 - 4:54I was quite “wow, this is like a subtitle
somewhere” but it is -
4:55 - 4:59and I reflected on the theme of waiting
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5:01 - 5:07this morning we had a walk in the park
over here -
5:09 - 5:14and we sat in front of, I think, George
Washington, the statue, -
5:17 - 5:26and there were people protesting, voicing
support for the Syrian people, refugees -
5:27 - 5:31We sat there, I don't know how long
but it was very peaceful, -
5:31 - 5:39to be sitting there and supporting that
effort and acknowledging and being there -
5:39 - 5:44and contributing our peace,
and then sharing lunch -
5:46 - 5:49I had the chance to touch deeply
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5:49 - 5:53and be reminded that I was a refugee
myself, our family, -
5:58 - 6:08In 1979, our family escaped Vietnam on a
boat with maybe 200, 300 people, -
6:10 - 6:13and I was maybe six, seven years old
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6:15 - 6:18I touched that, sitting there in the park,
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6:19 - 6:22'cause we heard some of the voice and some
of the speech -
6:25 - 6:29we also know that this country is built
on that, -
6:30 - 6:34refugee, we all come from somewhere,
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6:34 - 6:39but not from this land, this continent,
most of us at least -
6:41 - 6:46so I feel grateful to be here and
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6:47 - 6:53reflected on our time where we were in the
refugee camp, my family, -
6:53 - 6:58and we were waiting for some
country to sponsor us -
7:00 - 7:04I find out later, as a kid I was just
playing around in the refugee camp, -
7:04 - 7:06throwing rocks and things,
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7:07 - 7:14we were on an island off of Hong Kong,
and, reflecting, -
7:15 - 7:21there was this huge warehouse,
maybe the size of this auditorium -
7:22 - 7:27and we were all, each family had little
spots, mats on the floor -
7:28 - 7:37and that was our waiting spot
until someone, some country or some place -
7:38 - 7:40sponsor us
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7:41 - 7:47and we were sponsored by a
Christian family in Oregon -
7:47 - 7:50for us to come over
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7:50 - 7:54and I think this is, there was a lot of
movement back then -
7:54 - 7:58between the Buddhist community and
the Christian community, to help -
7:59 - 8:07so many churches rose to the occasion
to gather and sponsor one family -
8:07 - 8:13and I remember another family that
sponsored us, the church actually, -
8:13 - 8:18is not just one family but I remember
it was many families from that church -
8:18 - 8:21and they each contributed something,
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8:21 - 8:26they bought a hous e for our family,
it was a two story house -
8:27 - 8:30they bought it and they filled it up with
furniture and food and everything -
8:30 - 8:38and I remember opening the cabinet full of
food and canned food and all kinds of food -
8:38 - 8:42and I couldn't believe how much food
was in that house -
8:43 - 8:46as well as toys, there was a room
full of toys -
8:47 - 8:50I think they collected from other
church members -
8:51 - 8:53and I remember opening the door and
seeing toys -
8:54 - 8:58and didn't know how to play some
of them I remember, 'cause it was so new -
9:00 - 9:07and the top floor was maybe 4 or 6 rooms,
there was many rooms and they wanted, -
9:07 - 9:13my mom and dad, there was four of us,
so they gave us each a room -
9:15 - 9:18I had a room, my sister had a room,
my brother had a room -
9:18 - 9:21even though they were little, they each
had a room -
9:21 - 9:25but we ended up staying in one room
my parents' room -
9:26 - 9:29in fact, I think my two brothers, and
I think I did too -
9:29 - 9:31we slept on this huge bed
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9:32 - 9:36you know, that's what we were used to
at the refugee camp -
9:36 - 9:39So that's, you know, sitting there in the
park today, -
9:39 - 9:47these memories of, of you know,
of having a place to come back to -
9:48 - 9:50and feeling grateful,
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9:51 - 9:54my mom kept in touch with our,
they call them sponsors -
9:56 - 10:00I never actually learned their names,
because around the house -
10:00 - 10:04they were just mentioned as sponsors
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10:07 - 10:12and this is a beautiful image
of people coming together -
10:13 - 10:15to help those in need
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10:16 - 10:19and this is what I remember around the
house growing up -
10:20 - 10:23my mom once in a while
would take a trip up to Oregon -
10:25 - 10:29and meet with our sponsor
and many other families -
10:30 - 10:31this is,
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10:34 - 10:38so the theme of waiting came up,
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10:39 - 10:43of waiting for a place to come,
to take refuge in -
10:45 - 10:49this is an important theme for me
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10:51 - 10:54'cause it's been a theme for
my whole family, my parents -
10:55 - 11:00as well as my grandparents, they
had to escape China after the revolution -
11:01 - 11:09and then my parents escaping (to) America
and then I guess my turn is, I kind of, -
11:10 - 11:13my turn is to escape America I guess
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11:14 - 11:20in terms of actually growing up in
Los Angeles, in the city, -
11:21 - 11:25confronting a lot of suffering
as well as a young person -
11:26 - 11:29in a way, becoming a monk, now I see,
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11:30 - 11:39another way of looking at it is taking
refuge or how shall I, a full-time refugee -
11:43 - 11:51I'm a full-time refugee now
and I'm always taking refuge -
11:53 - 11:58and this is a wonderful way to remind
myself, as I was sitting there in the park -
11:59 - 12:05What am I taking refuge in?
What am I waiting for? -
12:05 - 12:08Am I waiting for another sponsor,
another country? -
12:10 - 12:15And as I follow my breath, I realize that
what my teacher has taught me is -
12:16 - 12:19I take refuge in my breath
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12:20 - 12:23and taking refuge in the island
within myself -
12:25 - 12:27and the breath that saved me
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12:27 - 12:33once, when I learned from my teacher
what the power of the breath is -
12:34 - 12:37when you simply take an inbreath,
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12:37 - 12:42conscious inbreath, we become aware
of the inbreath coming in -
12:45 - 12:48when we breathe out, we let go
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12:49 - 12:52we let that outbreath penetrate
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12:52 - 12:55let it come from every cell of your body
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12:56 - 12:58feel the lightness as you breathe out
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12:59 - 13:03and I remember training like that,
sitting still -
13:04 - 13:09in the forest in France in our monastery
or in the bamboo grove -
13:10 - 13:14and I remember taking refuge in my breath
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13:16 - 13:19as I feel the breath into my body
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13:21 - 13:25every time we take a conscious breath
and we bring our mind to the breath -
13:26 - 13:32is a break from all of
the thinking, all the worries, -
13:32 - 13:34all the anxiety that we have,
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13:34 - 13:41that we're used to, we're so used to be
thinking and using our mind -
13:41 - 13:44and being constantly occupied
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13:45 - 13:52is always talking, a lot of
stimulation in our minds -
13:52 - 13:57and we don't know what it feels like
to actually just let it go -
13:58 - 13:59and just come back to the breath
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14:01 - 14:02When we come back to the breath
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14:03 - 14:09our minds come back to our body
return to our body -
14:10 - 14:15sometimes we are present, with our body
but our mind is somewhere else -
14:15 - 14:18and you can see that phenomenon
happening more and more -
14:19 - 14:24My brother and I, we walked the street
from Greenwich, -
14:26 - 14:32and sometime we come up and I see
all these shops, cafés, places -
14:32 - 14:37and place where people come to eat or
drink and I like to peek in there -
14:39 - 14:44and I've been finding that there is
a couple sitting there at the table -
14:45 - 14:47and it looks nice but they're both
you know, not present -
14:49 - 14:51I mean, they're present to their gadget
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14:51 - 14:55I think you're starting to see
that phenomenon -
14:57 - 15:01and so, this is our situation
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15:04 - 15:10This is the state that the coach of our
society is moving towards -
15:11 - 15:14This is something we need to look at,
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15:15 - 15:22there are wars and conflicts
between groups and nations -
15:23 - 15:30But we also need to look at where we're at
in the place we live, in our family -
15:30 - 15:36we have to look deeply and see: Are we
present? Are we present to ourselves? -
15:36 - 15:39Are we present to our loved ones?”
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15:40 - 15:45This is something I'm realizing
more and more -
15:46 - 15:54so when we come back to the breath,
it's a wonderful place for refuge -
15:55 - 15:58when we have a strong emotion
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15:58 - 16:03when we have something
that's coming up for us, difficult -
16:04 - 16:07we always have the breath to return to
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16:07 - 16:09take an inbreath
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16:11 - 16:13take an outbreath
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16:13 - 16:16take a break from that emotion,
take a break from that thought -
16:18 - 16:19(sound of the gong)
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16:19 - 16:21in
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16:24 - 16:25out
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16:25 - 16:28(sound of the gong)
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16:51 - 16:56In the monastery, when we hear
the sound of the bell, -
16:57 - 17:01we train to come back to our breath
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17:02 - 17:05I tell you now, and it sounds easy,
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17:06 - 17:10maybe you do it for a few minutes here
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17:11 - 17:14but I'm pretty sure, after this event,
you go outside, -
17:15 - 17:22and you go back to your habits and
tendencies to start thinking again -
17:24 - 17:28so the stopping, to come back
to the present moment -
17:28 - 17:32to be in touch with our body as it moves,
as it sits, requires training -
17:33 - 17:40So in the monastery, I remember in our
dining hall, we have a clock that chimes -
17:41 - 17:46I remember first being in Plum Village,
our monastery in France, -
17:47 - 17:51that it was difficult every time that
the clock chimed, -
17:51 - 17:55and I'm in the middle of a conversation,
like after lunch or something, -
17:55 - 18:00it was really annoying
and I always wonder, I always question -
18:01 - 18:05how did our teacher come up with this?
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18:05 - 18:10It's really a good hoop but
it was pretty radical -
18:11 - 18:14because, you know, the chime is
right there in the dining hall -
18:15 - 18:17and it was every fifteen minutes
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18:18 - 18:22And I remember trying to figure out
how to make it so it's a little longer -
18:23 - 18:27but I think, the brothers, I asked
permission and they didn't allow that -
18:28 - 18:34It was like an old one, it didn't
have options back then -
18:34 - 18:36but it was all fifteen minutes
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18:37 - 18:42but I remember, you're in the middle
of a conversation and it chimes, -
18:43 - 18:47and at first you're like “OK, you have
to do it” you know, -
18:48 - 18:50so you don't really enjoy it
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18:51 - 19:01and this is just from habit of not yet
used to a kind of clear thoughtless mind -
19:02 - 19:07you're used to always engage
and be in conversation -
19:08 - 19:10or always thinking of something,
you know, it's.. -
19:11 - 19:16it requires training and I remember
I struggled with that in the beginning -
19:17 - 19:21so it's pretty typical for us
to have difficulty -
19:22 - 19:26but throughout the training,
as the years pass, -
19:27 - 19:32I begin to see more the value
of coming back to the breath -
19:33 - 19:36especially in meetings or,
we have gatherings -
19:36 - 19:39and a strong emotion will come up
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19:40 - 19:44and slowly I began to see
the benefits of taking a break -
19:45 - 19:49the delaying of continual thought,
having a pause -
19:51 - 19:59I began to see the benefit of that
so this is one of the refuges that I found -
20:00 - 20:05that slowly become more and more
deeper for me, -
20:06 - 20:08finding different ways that it helps me
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20:09 - 20:12So just take a break,
train yourself -
20:13 - 20:17I sometimes share with the young adults
during Wake Up school -
20:19 - 20:27that a restful mind, a clear mind,
a thoughtless mind, -
20:28 - 20:31it sounds weird, thoughtless,
you don't want to be thoughtless -
20:32 - 20:35but more and more I think
we will gonna want to, -
20:38 - 20:41to use terms like that, because
we're so always thinking -
20:41 - 20:45that we don't know what it feels like
and I tell the young people, -
20:47 - 20:51“do you know what it feels like
when you have a bad breath?” -
20:51 - 20:58You know? After a six hour, ten hours
plane ride you get off and you're like oh, -
21:00 - 21:02You know? You don't want to talk
to anybody, right? -
21:03 - 21:08And we were not born to brush
our teeth, you learn that, -
21:09 - 21:11and you learn what it feels like,
to kind of ... -
21:14 - 21:18it's something you learn, you don't want
to be near or talk to someone like that -
21:19 - 21:25so our mind is like that, our mind is
restless, is angry, it is full of tension -
21:26 - 21:29and we think that's the norm
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21:29 - 21:32So, I say this, because it's
a little graphic and visual -
21:35 - 21:40'cause it tells you, we're so used to
this being full of, you know, stuff -
21:42 - 21:47but the equivalent is restless,
angry, full of emotion -
21:48 - 21:51you don't want to be, what happens
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21:52 - 21:56I use it as an example, because young
people find it very easy to understand -
21:57 - 22:01so, training our mind to feel when
it's fresh, like a fresh breath -
22:04 - 22:07it requires some training,
it needs some effort -
22:08 - 22:12so sitting down, finding time,
once a day and so on, -
22:12 - 22:17to really find that refuge of a fresh mind
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22:17 - 22:19you know the word 'brainwash'?
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22:21 - 22:23I like to reuse that word, you know
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22:23 - 22:26people hate to be brainwashed, it's like
kind of like cultish and all that, -
22:27 - 22:29but actually, it's a nice term
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22:32 - 22:34think about it, brainwash
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22:34 - 22:39it means like your brain is full of stuff,
it needs a washing -
22:44 - 22:48You grew up in your family,
I think you know what I mean -
22:50 - 22:54(laughter) - sorry
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22:56 - 22:59she's going to save me after
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23:01 - 23:03(whispering) sister, can I use your clock?
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23:04 - 23:06Sure, but it's a little bit fast
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23:08 - 23:11(normal voice)
This is a training, to be up here, -
23:11 - 23:15for us to share with you,
and it's also a training for us -
23:19 - 23:22so, the topic of waiting,
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23:23 - 23:32I grew up in, educated in
California as an architect -
23:33 - 23:39and studied, and wanted to be good and,
you know, make a name for myself and so on -
23:42 - 23:48to have a house and two garages,
you know, the American dream -
23:52 - 23:56my mother and my father sacrificed a lot
-
23:57 - 24:00for the children,
my two brothers and my sister, -
24:02 - 24:07they escaped with nothing
they had to leave everything -
24:07 - 24:12I remember giving away my toys
and I said why am I giving away my toys? -
24:14 - 24:17And I remember my dad
giving away his Honda -
24:20 - 24:23and slowly, our furniture,
we had to -
24:23 - 24:26but we had to do it secretively
so the neighborhoods don't know -
24:27 - 24:30we're going to escape one night
on a boat -
24:31 - 24:34and we left everything to come here
-
24:35 - 24:40I remember there was a lot of push
from my mom especially, -
24:40 - 24:46to be successful and to make, you know,
-
24:47 - 24:51and that's a dream for
all mothers and fathers -
24:52 - 25:00and I see as I grew up I saw there was a
lot of promotion and a lot of effort -
25:00 - 25:07to reach the diploma to become this
and that, -
25:07 - 25:11you know, all the awards and so on,
-
25:11 - 25:15these stickers you get, I forget
what they're called, certificates -
25:17 - 25:22you get trained to be like
always be somebody -
25:23 - 25:26and then you become an architect,
you work in, and you look -
25:27 - 25:32you see whose office is closer to whose
and who's got the better project -
25:35 - 25:41that's the system I grew up in
and I was stuck in that -
25:42 - 25:48and also, growing up,
I had difficulties with my father -
25:50 - 25:53he struggled a lot coming over here,
losing everything -
25:54 - 25:59so for me, I had a lot of anger issues
with my father -
26:01 - 26:06I think this is something
that the practise helped me with -
26:07 - 26:11to learn to come back
and look at ourselves -
26:12 - 26:16and to really confront the suffering
that I was having as a young man -
26:17 - 26:21and it helped me become a little happier,
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26:21 - 26:24once the practise
helped me look at my father -
26:25 - 26:29and look at my relationship with him
to begin to understand him more -
26:30 - 26:33and to begin to understand
my own suffering -
26:34 - 26:40and this is what was
the benefit of sitting, -
26:42 - 26:45of silencing the mind a little
-
26:46 - 26:50calming and having time to look deeply
at my emotions, -
26:50 - 26:54where I'm at,
and the goals I'm setting for myself -
26:56 - 27:01this helped me to understand more
of what true happiness was -
27:02 - 27:06once I was able to touch a little bit
of the root of my suffering -
27:08 - 27:13I was also able to touch,
so the things that I'm passing by -
27:14 - 27:17because of some future promise,
-
27:18 - 27:22to become this, to become that,
always wanting more -
27:22 - 27:28and I think it's a kind of suffering
always thinking that you're lacking -
27:29 - 27:34and this is something that's kind of
underneath our culture a little bit -
27:35 - 27:39and with the practise,
I think it can help all of us to really, -
27:40 - 27:44to recognize,
“wow, I'm still alive” -
27:46 - 27:48there's my eyes,
-
27:49 - 27:53my body is in good condition,
I'm healthy enough -
27:56 - 27:58my tooth-ache
-
27:59 - 28:04my teacher shared with us
about the tooth-ache, it's very.. -
28:05 - 28:09sorry, back to hygiene, but you know,
-
28:10 - 28:13this moment is a Non-Toothache moment
-
28:16 - 28:21it's kind of silly, 'what does that mean?'
but all you need to do is just reflect and -
28:23 - 28:29remember that tooth in the back,
-
28:30 - 28:35remember when it was aching
and the gum was inflamed? -
28:37 - 28:39Just touching that,
-
28:39 - 28:42even though it's not a great suffering,
it was suffering -
28:43 - 28:46and it reminds us like,
oh, how wonderful! -
28:48 - 28:50I don't have a tooth-ache now
-
28:53 - 28:57And this is a practise, just like stopping,
to recognize the breath, -
28:59 - 29:04recognizing a thoughtless,
a mind that's clear -
29:06 - 29:10it's a training to actually be
present to this moment -
29:10 - 29:11to this present moment
-
29:11 - 29:15and to recognize that wow,
the conditions are so many -
29:16 - 29:20I remember our teacher gave us homework,
to write down all the wonderful conditions -
29:22 - 29:27the happy moments in your life now,
and it's a wonderful exercise -
29:29 - 29:33and your loved one,
your brothers, your sisters -
29:34 - 29:39this is also something, we're there with
our loved ones, but we're not present -
29:43 - 29:47my brother made us some tea
before coming here -
29:47 - 29:50we were hanging out
at somebody's place -
29:51 - 29:58and he brought his tea-set and he made
one of my brothers, three of us, tea -
29:59 - 30:04and I recognized like 'wow'!
we haven't had tea for a while -
30:06 - 30:09and we sat there and drank tea together
-
30:10 - 30:15so, to recognize that,
my younger brother is so sweet -
30:16 - 30:20he brought his tea material
and we'd just woken up from a nap -
30:21 - 30:24and the first thing he does is
make us tea -
30:25 - 30:30I was reading a book or something and
I closed it and we looked at each other -
30:30 - 30:34and we're drinking tea,
I mean, that sounds like really, -
30:35 - 30:38what does that have to do with
my happiness, my career? -
30:40 - 30:46but that moment actually is the building
block for the rest of ... -
30:48 - 30:50that's your living
-
30:51 - 30:55so sometimes we put a lot of goals
and a lot of things that we want -
30:55 - 30:57but actually when we get there,
we want more -
30:59 - 31:03I give you an example, you have
a tea cup, you drink your tea -
31:03 - 31:05and you want to do the next thing, and
when you get to the next thing -
31:06 - 31:09you want to do, and so on,
and this is the way we've been trained -
31:10 - 31:14and this is where we're at as a coach
and we need to look -
31:15 - 31:20so when I say, I will become refugee
-
31:21 - 31:27I mean, in my lifetime we'll see that we
will need, we will all become refugees -
31:27 - 31:31and it's a kind of different thing,
it's not about one nation and another -
31:32 - 31:37but we will all need a place where
we can escape a little bit of all that -
31:38 - 31:44online, and wifi, and you know,
all this stuff, it's everywhere now -
31:46 - 31:53and we have no time to be with ourselves
and to be present for our body -
31:54 - 31:59be present with the moment
to enjoy life as it is in the now -
32:00 - 32:05to be present with our loved one
and to be present with nature -
32:06 - 32:11this is where we're heading at
-
32:11 - 32:13besides the climate change and all this
-
32:14 - 32:16there's something happening to our culture
-
32:18 - 32:22we're traveling around the world,
we see escalating faster and faster -
32:24 - 32:29and so, I hope you continue to train,
-
32:29 - 32:33to find a refuge within
-
32:34 - 32:40a refugee-camp within
we all will need that -
32:40 - 32:44and when you have a strong emotion
or when you need a break -
32:44 - 32:48you feel out of touch with
what you need to do -
32:48 - 32:53come back, everything you need,
everything you have is there -
32:54 - 32:58it's only from that place
that we can help change -
32:58 - 33:04where we're at as a society
as a human on this planet -
33:06 - 33:10we keep struggling, fighting that,
but we don't have this refuge, -
33:11 - 33:13then it will be difficult
-
33:14 - 33:19my sister, Dieu Nghiem will continue
on this theme for us -
33:20 - 33:23please take a breath,
-
33:24 - 33:28come back to that refugee-camp inside
-
33:28 - 33:32we all need a refugee-camp
once in a while -
33:37 - 33:41(sounds of the gong)
-
34:30 - 34:33There are times where I wonder
-
34:35 - 34:40why can I not go back to my refugee-camp
-
34:40 - 34:45or this place me that I like to call home
-
34:46 - 34:48why can I not go back home?
-
34:49 - 34:52What is preventing me
from going back home to myself -
34:57 - 35:03when my mind and body are in
the same place, I feel at home -
35:04 - 35:08I've been fortunate enough to always
have had a roof over my head -
35:09 - 35:13to have a home,
but I've not always been home -
35:13 - 35:15I'm not always home
-
35:15 - 35:18I was reminded of this
as I walked to come here -
35:19 - 35:23and I see so many posters saying
“bring him home” the Martian -
35:24 - 35:31and I thought, when they bring him home,
will he be really and truly home? -
35:31 - 35:34Will he find his true home?
-
35:35 - 35:37So I've reflected on that
-
35:39 - 35:42my true home as my brother said,
brother Phap Dung, brother Embrace, -
35:46 - 35:49really truly home with ourselves
-
35:51 - 35:56many years ago, there was a lady from
Austria that came to Plum Village -
35:58 - 36:02and at the end of her stay,
at the end of the retreat -
36:02 - 36:07we asked some friends to give some input,
how it had been for them -
36:09 - 36:12and this lady said
she came to Plum Village because -
36:13 - 36:18she had read somewhere
Thomas Morton's words that said -
36:20 - 36:25you can see Thich Nhat Hanh is a monk
by the way he closes a door -
36:26 - 36:30so she had come to watch us closing doors
-
36:33 - 36:36we didn't know
maybe just as well -
36:39 - 36:43however, she must have
been impressed, because -
36:43 - 36:46she was scheduled to stay one week
and she stayed two -
36:49 - 36:55so, closing a door,
for me that became like a practise -
36:56 - 36:58how do I close doors?
-
36:59 - 37:02I think we all have doors somewhere
that we can close -
37:03 - 37:07either where this is a swing door
so, open if you act -
37:07 - 37:11but closing a door or
opening a door by taking the knob, -
37:12 - 37:13turning it, or the handle,
-
37:14 - 37:17and pushing it down
and pushing open the door -
37:18 - 37:22so it's very interesting to observe
how do we open a door? -
37:23 - 37:27And how do we close a door?
It's just a door -
37:28 - 37:32but it is a wonderful way
to bring us back to our home -
37:34 - 37:36to put our hand on the knob
-
37:37 - 37:41to feel the knob in our hand, already
brings our mind back to our body -
37:42 - 37:46so I turn the knob
or I push the handle down -
37:47 - 37:51and I'm aware of
how much force I use to open the door -
37:52 - 37:53and to close the door
-
37:54 - 37:58so if you don't have time
to sit, and breathe -
37:59 - 38:02maybe, since you're going
through the door anyway, -
38:03 - 38:07you can make that your practise
of going home -
38:09 - 38:11but coming home also is something else,
-
38:12 - 38:18like coming home to that place
where it's quiet -
38:19 - 38:23I've noticed, here in New York
it's quite noisy, outside -
38:25 - 38:28and as I was walking,
I came here on foot -
38:30 - 38:34I thought, yes, it's very noisy,
but let me see -
38:37 - 38:41if I just let the noise be,
then, is it then quiet? -
38:47 - 38:49And I realized, I'm thinking
-
38:51 - 38:55and sometimes I find,
even if there's no noise around me, -
38:55 - 38:58it's quite noisy inside
-
38:59 - 39:03maybe the most noise is inside,
the outer noise not so much -
39:05 - 39:11and when I listen to this noise,
I see most is just unuseful thinking -
39:11 - 39:13not helpful at all
-
39:16 - 39:19and then I think, ok, can I close a door?
-
39:20 - 39:22Why am I thinking so much?
-
39:22 - 39:28I've just come out of a meeting and
I carry things out of the meeting with me -
39:28 - 39:33I've already closed the door, right?
Physically, but in my head, no -
39:34 - 39:37why did she say this in that way?
-
39:37 - 39:39Why didn't she flow along, etcetera
-
39:41 - 39:44the meeting was closed, but not everywhere
-
39:47 - 39:50I continued the meeting in my head
-
39:51 - 39:55so, close the door, the meeting is over
close the door -
39:57 - 40:02and then, as I closed the door,
it's the same as opening a door -
40:03 - 40:08it means: new possibilities,
new challenges -
40:08 - 40:12and can I be there for the possibilities
or for the challenges -
40:19 - 40:23maybe we can close the door for a moment
with the sound of a bell? -
40:24 - 40:25Just close the door
-
40:26 - 40:29and enjoy an in- and an outbreath
-
40:29 - 40:32and just let the world be for one moment
-
40:37 - 40:42(sound of the gong)
-
41:06 - 41:09closing the door as we hear
a sound of the bell -
41:09 - 41:11or as we stop for a traffic light
-
41:11 - 41:14closing the door when we leave the office
-
41:18 - 41:21one retreatant came,
she would like to have a consultation -
41:22 - 41:25and she said, my problem is,
-
41:27 - 41:33I feel I'm married
to my husband's business -
41:36 - 41:39she said, when he comes home,
he brings the whole business with him -
41:41 - 41:43and of course, when we come home,
-
41:43 - 41:45there may be something that happened
in the office, we want to share, -
41:46 - 41:51but it was not just that, like something
shared, and 'this is how I feel about it', -
41:51 - 41:55it was all about the problems and about
the things, business, business, business -
41:56 - 41:58she said,
I think I'm married to a business -
42:00 - 42:05so when we closed the door of the office
and we go home -
42:05 - 42:12and then we open the door
of our apartment or house, -
42:16 - 42:19and we close the door behind us
and truly close the door, -
42:20 - 42:22then we can be truly present
for our loved ones -
42:23 - 42:26for our children, our partner
we can be there -
42:28 - 42:32we can share with them from our heart
and we can listen with our heart -
42:33 - 42:35and we can enrich each other's lives
-
42:39 - 42:47I am of Irish and Dutch decent,
of an Irish mother and ad Dutch father -
42:51 - 42:54and it took me a while when I started to
-
42:55 - 42:57we lived in Ireland and then
in the Netherlands -
42:57 - 43:00it took me a while to find out
where I belonged -
43:02 - 43:05I was kind of a little bit up-rooted
am I Dutch? Am I Irish? -
43:05 - 43:09Inside the house, it's Irish,
outside the house it's Dutch -
43:10 - 43:12where are my roots?
-
43:14 - 43:17And, if we want to live,
we need to have roots -
43:18 - 43:20trees have roots
-
43:21 - 43:25if you cut the tree from its root,
it won't continue to live -
43:26 - 43:30rivers have a source
if we cut the river from the source, -
43:31 - 43:33the river will stop living
-
43:34 - 43:36so if we want to start living
-
43:37 - 43:41we also need to nourish our roots,
our ancestors -
43:43 - 43:47so I would say, stop waiting
and start living -
43:48 - 43:54also in a way of, start celebrating life
celebrating our ancestors -
43:55 - 44:00our blood ancestors
our adopted ancestors -
44:01 - 44:05our spiritual ancestors
our land ancestors -
44:08 - 44:12to bring them, to reconnect with them
to be nourished by them -
44:13 - 44:16we cannot take our ancestors out of us
-
44:17 - 44:22our youngest ancestors, our parents
they are our ancestors -
44:22 - 44:24we cannot say,
I have nothing to do with you -
44:25 - 44:28no, we have all and
everything to do with them -
44:28 - 44:35we are their continuation
all our ancestors are within us -
44:38 - 44:44connecting with them inside of ourselves
-
44:45 - 44:48to recognize all their strength
they have transmitted to us -
44:48 - 44:50and also all the weaknesses
-
44:51 - 44:56and to nourish their strength and
to take care of their pain and suffering -
44:56 - 44:59of the wounded child that was
in them as well -
44:59 - 45:01and that is now also in us
-
45:01 - 45:04it's not just our child, our wounded child
-
45:04 - 45:08when we say 'our',
we mean all our ancestors -
45:12 - 45:15so, to connect with our ancestors
-
45:16 - 45:19in Plum Village we have Ancestors Festival
-
45:21 - 45:23where we honor our ancestors
-
45:24 - 45:28and where we express gratitude
to our ancestors -
45:30 - 45:35recognizing that we are their continuation
they are our roots -
45:42 - 45:49we all may like to look into our ancestors
and find ways to celebrate our ancestors -
45:50 - 45:51to celebrate our roots
-
45:52 - 45:56in order to find stability
in order to find freedom -
45:57 - 46:00in order to be able to be truly there
and truly alive -
46:01 - 46:03for ourselves and for our loved ones
-
46:06 - 46:12I know that in New York, you celebrate
St Patrick's Day much much bigger -
46:12 - 46:15than in Ireland I've ever seen
-
46:17 - 46:20I think there are many Irish people,
here also -
46:20 - 46:22maybe also refugees
-
46:23 - 46:30but staying connected to their roots
in this way, our roots are tradition -
46:33 - 46:36a tradition can be renewed, refreshed
-
46:36 - 46:40but a tradition is also our refuge
and our root -
46:45 - 46:47so, celebrate
-
46:47 - 46:49in Plum Village,
we celebrate also the Earth -
46:51 - 46:54we celebrate Spring, the Daffodil Festival
-
46:55 - 46:59we celebrate Plum Blossom Festival
-
46:59 - 47:03we have Full Moon Festival
the Solstice -
47:05 - 47:10they're roots we share all of us,
and we can celebrate together -
47:23 - 47:27let's celebrate a moment together
-
47:29 - 47:32by just getting in touch with our roots
-
47:32 - 47:41you can just close your eyes
and see our roots as the Earth, -
47:41 - 47:45we're part of the Earth
and everything that's in and on it -
47:45 - 47:50although we don't have roots like a tree,
we are rooted in the Earth -
47:51 - 47:54we have come from the Earth
-
47:54 - 47:58the Earth is also our roots with
all and everything that's on the Earth -
48:01 - 48:03so, just for a moment,
-
48:04 - 48:08connect with our roots of the Earth
with our land ancestors -
48:09 - 48:12our spiritual ancestors
our adopted ancestors -
48:13 - 48:15and our blood ancestors
-
48:22 - 48:27(sound of the bell)
-
49:09 - 49:13we, the monastics,
we're rooted in the Plum Village tradition -
49:18 - 49:22we celebrate every breath
we celebrate every step -
49:24 - 49:26whenever we walk, where we walk
-
49:27 - 49:30we walk on the Earth with love
and with compassion -
49:31 - 49:36we walk as if we're kissing the Earth
with our feet, even here in New York -
49:37 - 49:40as I was walking, I was kissing the Earth
with my feet, -
49:42 - 49:44saying “dear Earth, we love you
-
49:44 - 49:48I know we have covered you with stone,
with asphalt, with tarmac -
49:48 - 49:50with a lot of things
-
49:50 - 49:53we love you
we're here for you -
49:54 - 49:55we want to be here for you
-
49:56 - 49:58because you're here for us always
-
50:00 - 50:05and this walking gave me stability
and gave me freedom -
50:06 - 50:08as I was aware of my steps
I felt the contact -
50:08 - 50:12between my feet and the Earth
I created some space -
50:13 - 50:15some space inside
-
50:15 - 50:18I created some silence inside
-
50:20 - 50:25space to be there
when our heart is small, -
50:25 - 50:27Thay says,
sometimes it's like a peanut -
50:28 - 50:30I think,
sometimes my heart is like a mung bean -
50:31 - 50:34there's no space, neither for myself
nor for anybody else -
50:35 - 50:38but walking like this, my heart opened
and there's space -
50:39 - 50:42there's space for everything I meet,
for everybody I meet in the street -
50:43 - 50:45and I can smile
-
50:46 - 50:49so you walk like this, it's our root
-
50:50 - 50:54in the early years, in the early 1990s
-
50:56 - 51:00friends of Plum Village, practitioners,
they went to Vietnam -
51:00 - 51:03and they visited Thay's root temple
-
51:04 - 51:08and as they were walking there,
they practised walking meditation -
51:10 - 51:12and a young monastic, a young novice
came up to them and said -
51:13 - 51:15“you must be from Plum Village”
-
51:15 - 51:17and they said “yes, how do you know?”
-
51:18 - 51:20and he said, I can see it by your walking
-
51:21 - 51:23it's our roots, our spiritual roots
-
51:23 - 51:28it's our walking, our breathing
our listening and our speaking -
51:29 - 51:33we listen to ourselves
with compassion to others -
51:35 - 51:42we speak lovingly
we learn how to truly love -
51:44 - 51:49how to truly love, how to offer compassion
how to be loving and kind -
51:50 - 51:52how to share our joy
-
51:52 - 51:55and how to embrace each other
with equanimity -
51:55 - 52:00that is true love
and we learn how to be truly happy -
52:01 - 52:03as my brother already said,
not running after things -
52:04 - 52:09but to see that we have more than enough
conditions to be happy already -
52:11 - 52:17we do not need that other ice-cream
not the coffee, -
52:17 - 52:20although we had coffee before we came here
-
52:25 - 52:26we can have coffee,
-
52:26 - 52:29but it's not because we don't have
enough conditions to be happy -
52:29 - 52:33it's to enjoy the conditions
for happiness we have -
52:42 - 52:47so, celebrate our spiritual roots,
whatever our spiritual roots may be -
52:47 - 52:49discover the beauties
-
52:50 - 52:54everything that contributes
to our own well-being, -
52:55 - 52:58to the well-being of the others
and the well-being of the world -
52:58 - 53:00and the Earth
-
53:01 - 53:03celebrate, connect
-
53:04 - 53:06and we can do this altogether
-
53:08 - 53:11I think my brother wanted
to add something to this -
53:16 - 53:19I'm his souffleur
-
53:22 - 53:25she's giving another chance
to share something -
53:25 - 53:26yes, please
-
53:26 - 53:30so I'll take this opportunity
I'll stop being nice -
53:38 - 53:42our teacher, you know, he was a radical monk
-
53:42 - 53:45he grew up in a time of war
-
53:45 - 53:50he saw the French come
and the Americans come -
53:51 - 53:57this is what produced this practise,
this tradition -
53:58 - 54:01you know, the classic images of a monk
-
54:01 - 54:05is not sitting in there,
praying and doing the gong -
54:06 - 54:11hoping that there will be a better world
that we can be reborn into -
54:12 - 54:15but he stood up
and he gathered the monastics -
54:16 - 54:19as well as his elder monks and venerables
-
54:20 - 54:25and they went into the villages to help,
they actively -
54:26 - 54:30so this is what has moved our teacher
-
54:31 - 54:33and now he's come to the West
-
54:33 - 54:37and he's seeing that some of the roots
of why those wars happen, -
54:39 - 54:43and I just want to throw that out there,
just so -
54:44 - 54:47as we been around our teacher
he sees like, you know, what people ask -
54:47 - 54:51why are you guys speaking against war
and going out there? -
54:52 - 54:57like going to the warring countries
and doing what your teacher did -
54:57 - 55:04and there is a real teaching to it,
to ask and to keep that awareness -
55:04 - 55:08like, why is Thay teaching us to breathe
and smile, what is that? -
55:10 - 55:12Some people say that's like Buddhism,
right? -
55:14 - 55:16Like, what is that, you know?
-
55:17 - 55:20There is a real challenge
for our community -
55:20 - 55:23as we struggle between engagement
-
55:23 - 55:26and also taking, not losing ourselves
-
55:27 - 55:32'cause the war starts when we're actually
we've lost our roots, lost our refuge -
55:32 - 55:37we are not happy with just being alive
on this planet -
55:37 - 55:39you're going to die,
-
55:40 - 55:43the world will go on, you're going to die,
you know, -
55:44 - 55:49so our teacher teaches to really come
from a deeper, -
55:50 - 55:52of course you do the social change
-
55:52 - 55:54you do these activities
-
55:55 - 55:58but don't lose these deep moments
for yourself -
55:59 - 56:01and to do it together
-
56:01 - 56:07and this is our teacher's challenge
to our next century -
56:09 - 56:11I think maybe some of you heard,
-
56:12 - 56:17our teacher sharing about the last
century as a century of individualism -
56:19 - 56:24you know, everyone, me and my nation
and my people and so on -
56:25 - 56:28and it's caused a lot of stuff happen
-
56:29 - 56:32so the teacher is really emphasizing
on the collective -
56:34 - 56:38and it's tough to be in the collective,
part of this community -
56:38 - 56:40you know, it's not easy
-
56:40 - 56:43you have to conform and
you have to be like the rest -
56:43 - 56:48and kind of like, lose your identity
I just tell you some of the truth about it -
56:50 - 56:52it challenges every L.A. seed in me!
-
56:55 - 56:58I want to go out there and
change L.A. you know, -
56:58 - 56:59and the brothers say, no,
-
57:00 - 57:03you're going to go breathe and
walk in the woods -
57:08 - 57:10sorry my sisters and brothers
-
57:12 - 57:15it's a challenge to be part of a community
-
57:15 - 57:19it is, because it goes
against everything we know, -
57:19 - 57:21you know, I have rights,
-
57:21 - 57:27especially when you're right
you have to just.. -
57:28 - 57:34and this is the root of war
“I'm right” -
57:36 - 57:39and to live in a collective,
to live in a community -
57:40 - 57:44to live in a family, you know that,
that's a small little community there -
57:44 - 57:49in the family, around the kitchen
around the dining table -
57:50 - 57:51I was witness to that
-
57:52 - 57:57because we're not able to let go and see
the 'come on, it's just' -
57:59 - 58:01so this is the training for us
-
58:01 - 58:05to learn to let go of
our own ideas or notions -
58:06 - 58:08of what is right, what is wrong,
what is just -
58:08 - 58:09sometimes,
-
58:09 - 58:12even fighting for a just cause,
we cause a lot of suffering -
58:13 - 58:17so we have to be careful
as we come together and help -
58:18 - 58:21and remind ourselves
to check in with each other -
58:21 - 58:24to see that 'hey, is this where we want to go?”
-
58:25 - 58:30so this is a challenge our teacher has
for our community,
for our next -
58:31 - 58:37you know, he's famous for having said
our teacher has a saying that's pretty, -
58:39 - 58:41I haven't heard it anywhere
-
58:41 - 58:45“the next Buddha will be your community”
-
58:46 - 58:48that's very beautiful, you know
can you imagine that, -
58:49 - 58:52you don't look for somebody leading
and charging, and -
58:52 - 58:54oh well the Buddha will
probably do something -
58:55 - 58:59but the community that actually
deals with challenges, suffering -
59:00 - 59:03but it checks itself, it helps each other
-
59:03 - 59:07there's a sense of love
and understanding, of septance -
59:07 - 59:10cause this is all the energy,
-
59:10 - 59:16all the difficulties that we're facing
as a family as a group of people -
59:16 - 59:20as a work place right,
where you look, and your company -
59:21 - 59:24what are the most challenging things
at your work place -
59:24 - 59:26it's all about that,
-
59:26 - 59:28people don't know how to work together
you have to let go -
59:29 - 59:33so the collective for us is a challenge,
-
59:34 - 59:38how to learn these practises
so we don't lose our center, -
59:39 - 59:43our harmony within
and then working ways, -
59:43 - 59:45finding ways to build community
-
59:46 - 59:51because to resist this other energy,
we need to do it as a community -
59:51 - 59:56and we need everyone to have
this kind of training so that you feel -
59:57 - 60:00I don't need another sweater,
just because it's a new season -
60:01 - 60:03or they change color on me again
-
60:08 - 60:13sorry, I remember, it's brown season,
it's yellow season -
60:13 - 60:16you know, you got to change your whole
wardrobe just because they say so -
60:18 - 60:20so they know, I don't want to say 'they'
-
60:21 - 60:26maybe some of us are in
advertising media now -
60:28 - 60:33but they know how the mind works
and if you don't know how your mind works -
60:33 - 60:38and if we don't come together
we're just, you think you're free -
60:42 - 60:47I'm sorry to kind of lay it out there
'cause this is our last chance -
60:49 - 60:53but this is what I've learned from my teacher
and I just wanted to share with you -
60:54 - 60:59we need to come together and really
resist all these temptations -
61:00 - 61:05these kind of temporary pleasures
these moments, right -
61:05 - 61:10more consuming, more stimulation, entertaining yourself
-
61:10 - 61:15this is what is happening
-
61:15 - 61:20we need to find ways to come together,
to resist -
61:21 - 61:24so, have a refugee-camp but do it together
-
61:25 - 61:29that's the addition I think
my sister was inviting me to add -
61:30 - 61:34so not just you alone on the
island in a refugee-camp -
61:34 - 61:40but bring friends, make friends
come together and make that island, expand -
61:41 - 61:45and if we can do this together
here a little bit -
61:45 - 61:48and a little bit around the planet
-
61:48 - 61:51I think, I'm pretty hopeful
-
61:52 - 61:58and we need to keep that,
don't let it drag you down -
61:59 - 62:01we were at the Huffington Post
-
62:01 - 62:04and we learned that they have a
department for Good News -
62:07 - 62:08yeah, that is pretty cool
-
62:09 - 62:13and I asked them, so what do you guys do,
make stories up? -
62:14 - 62:20'cause I don't see any good news
in the news and they say, yeah, we shared, -
62:20 - 62:27they have a small team and actually
they look at stories out there, and -
62:27 - 62:32they try to find something positive
and they go do more research -
62:32 - 62:35and that's beautiful and
I was really moved, -
62:35 - 62:39there was like four or five in that
department, and that's their work -
62:40 - 62:44we need to do that, we need to do that
in our family, within ourselves -
62:44 - 62:47look, there's something
happening that's good for today -
62:48 - 62:51and accentuate it, do it in the family,
do it at your work, -
62:52 - 62:54please, do it in your work
-
62:56 - 63:00it's tough to work at a hard place,
but do it there -
63:00 - 63:03and then create your work,
become a community -
63:04 - 63:07and then begin to come together
build a sangha -
63:07 - 63:11a sangha is just a group of people
coming together -
63:11 - 63:15to remind each other with the practise
-
63:15 - 63:18so this is our teacher's deepest wish
-
63:19 - 63:25to have a little bit around
every place for us -
63:26 - 63:29to remind ourselves and
remind others -
63:31 - 63:33thank you
-
63:34 - 63:36I believe there's something
-
63:41 - 63:50oh yes, we now open the mike
for any questions or any comment or -
63:52 - 63:54I think there's a microphone around,
-
63:55 - 63:56I think there's some brothers and sisters
-
63:57 - 64:03who'll come up here to join us to add a
different perspective -
64:06 - 64:09is there a mike around?
-
64:10 - 64:18Yes, you can come up here if you'd
like to share or make a comment -
64:30 - 64:31oh, they have a mike right there
-
64:36 - 64:38I just wanted to thank you
-
64:40 - 64:46gratitude for sharing your love and your
light with us here, -
64:47 - 64:53and bringing your stories, your honesty,
your experience, your humor -
64:53 - 65:01really grateful for that, it's really
refreshing to embrace the reflection -
65:01 - 65:07we all know that we have within us
and to see a collective -
65:10 - 65:18as you say, this community that does exist
and I just wanted to say thank you, -
65:18 - 65:20I'm really grateful
-
65:26 - 65:28and congratulations
-
65:49 - 65:52sister Jang Nghiem and Phap Hai
have joined us -
65:53 - 65:57and they will take personal questions too,
so if you -
66:02 - 66:04yes, questions from the heart
-
66:07 - 66:13hi, welcome, I'm actually new to the city,
I'm from Philadelphia -
66:13 - 66:17so I drove up this morning, three hours,
I took the back roads -
66:19 - 66:28and I go to Weltran Unitarian church and
every Sunday I'm blessed to have a quote, -
66:29 - 66:32like there is up on the screen,
by Thich Nhat Hanh -
66:32 - 66:35that leads us
into meditation for five minutes -
66:36 - 66:39all you need to enter heaven on earth
is one conscious step, -
66:39 - 66:41one conscious breath
-
66:41 - 66:45and I really appreciate
this opportunity to be here with you -
66:46 - 66:51and my question, it takes me a long time
to get to my question, is -
66:52 - 66:55as you talk about refuge inside and
refuge in community, -
66:57 - 67:02I'm blessed to have a small community
that really is building on mindfulness, -
67:03 - 67:08it's probably the most rapidly growing
Unitarian church in the country which is -
67:09 - 67:13tremendous, because it's very open,
spiritually and we embraced -
67:13 - 67:17a lot of things, including
Thich Nhat Hanh's mindfulness -
67:19 - 67:24How can we, I'm sure everyone in this
room is from a different place, -
67:26 - 67:33in our society, in our jobs that are
not sitting mindfully all day long, -
67:35 - 67:47how can we bridge this experience into
the world of wifi and phones, -
67:48 - 67:52thinking of myself last night when I was
on my phone with my boyfriend -
67:52 - 67:58at the restaurant, how do we actually
try to do that more? -
68:21 - 68:24So, dear family, life's full of surprises,
-
68:24 - 68:28I stood up to walk off the stage
to stretch my legs -
68:30 - 68:35and I was invited, is the kind
way to put it, -
68:35 - 68:37to be part of the question-
and-answer panel -
68:37 - 68:42so I'm very happy to be sitting here
and as I received that invitation -
68:43 - 68:48to be part of the Q&A-panel
I realized that as a practitioner, -
68:49 - 68:54the most central practise for me,
is to learn how to say 'yes' -
68:56 - 68:59not only to say yes with my mouth,
-
69:00 - 69:06but to say yes to the experience
that I'm invited to have in this moment -
69:07 - 69:10to look at the places that I close down
-
69:10 - 69:15or the ways that I try to manufacture
this moment into something -
69:15 - 69:18that I believe it should be
-
69:21 - 69:23in our tradition, in the Plum
Village tradition, we practise -
69:23 - 69:28what we call 'Engaged Buddhism'
and we've all heard the stories about -
69:28 - 69:33going out to bombed out villages,
building schools, -
69:34 - 69:38doing flood-work relief work, we've done
all of those things -
69:38 - 69:40and we do all of those things
-
69:41 - 69:43and yet, at its core,
Engaged Buddhism means, -
69:44 - 69:49choosing to engage in this moment,
whatever this moment is -
69:50 - 69:52as a moment of practise
-
69:54 - 69:56we're coming into the Jewish New Year
-
69:56 - 70:00and I'm thinking of somebody called Victor Franco,
-
70:02 - 70:06who wrote in 'Men's search for meaning'
-
70:06 - 70:09something that we also find to be true
in Buddhism as well -
70:10 - 70:14we can't always, or very often,
choose our circumstances -
70:14 - 70:17but as human beings
-
70:17 - 70:22the one choice we truly have,
is the choice of how we respond -
70:25 - 70:30so when we say that we can't
sit all day mindfully, why not? -
70:31 - 70:33What does mindfully mean?
-
70:34 - 70:40Does it mean we need to go to a
mountainside or go to a cave or a hut, -
70:40 - 70:42a nice retreat-hut somewhere
-
70:43 - 70:47that was my view of what monastic life is
or life in the practise -
70:47 - 70:51and it's only ever happened once,
in twenty years -
70:54 - 71:00how do I use this moment as a moment
that I can be fully present in my body -
71:02 - 71:06with the experience that I'm having
with the person who's in front of me -
71:07 - 71:13Can I choose, when the phone rings,
to take an in-breath and an out-breath -
71:13 - 71:16bring myself back to my body and
pick up the phone -
71:17 - 71:22can I choose to, rather than
just run from here to the coffee-maker, -
71:22 - 71:30can I choose to take a few steps
with each breath, to arrive with each step -
71:30 - 71:34these are ways that it is possible for us
-
71:34 - 71:37to bring the practise of mindfulness
to our daily lives -
71:37 - 71:43so our spiritual life is not something
compart mentalized to one side -
71:43 - 71:45that we do inbetween things
-
71:46 - 71:50but it is actually our life itself
-
71:50 - 71:54that's the invitation of Engaged Buddhism
-
71:55 - 72:00to see what we can do, where we're
planted in this very moment -
72:00 - 72:03this is something that's possible for us
-
72:04 - 72:07there are some of us, there are maybe
a few hundred of us in this room -
72:09 - 72:12we're all sharing the same space together
-
72:13 - 72:17and yet, there are some of us in this room
who are thinking -
72:17 - 72:19oh, this talk was so interesting tonight,
-
72:20 - 72:24it was so wonderful to hear from a half-
Irish, half-Dutch senior disciple of Thay -
72:24 - 72:26and our brother Phap Dung
-
72:26 - 72:28there are so many interesting spirits
-
72:28 - 72:31and then there's others who are thinking
-
72:31 - 72:34I can't wait until this is over
why did I come here tonight? -
72:35 - 72:36This kind of thing
-
72:36 - 72:38some of us are in heaven,
some of us are in hell, -
72:38 - 72:40who's right, who's wrong?
-
72:42 - 72:45Now, I mean, some of you might think
it's a cheap shot, -
72:45 - 72:47but it really does depend on you, doesn't it
-
72:47 - 72:50it really does depend on our mind
and the way we interpret things -
72:51 - 72:53so I invite you to look at that
-
72:54 - 72:58I invite you to engage with that practise
and see if it's possible for you -
72:58 - 73:00to make just a small change
-
73:01 - 73:06not ten small changes,
but a small change in your daily life -
73:07 - 73:09good luck
-
73:24 - 73:29(sound of the bell)
-
73:44 - 73:46I want to thank you for being here
-
73:46 - 73:49and I'm really grateful for your
presence here -
73:50 - 73:55and your presence in the world
and I think about if there was -
73:56 - 74:01a beloved community of more people,
like in this room -
74:02 - 74:05how much empathy and how
much compassion -
74:05 - 74:06could really be present in the world
-
74:07 - 74:10and you've in a way answered
what my question was but -
74:11 - 74:14someone like me, I feel overwhelmed
when I read the news -
74:14 - 74:17really overwhelmed by for example
-
74:17 - 74:19what's happening to our brothers
and sisters in Syria -
74:21 - 74:28how do you balance being internal
and having compassion internally -
74:30 - 74:34and balancing that with being engaged
in the world -
74:34 - 74:37and something as small as
keeping up with the news -
74:38 - 74:42I could easily feel overwhelmed
and I know we have really beautiful -
74:42 - 74:45examples with Thich Nhat Hanh and
Martin Luther King -
74:45 - 74:49so we can reflect on their example
but how do you find that balance -
74:49 - 74:54when it's easy to feel overwhelmed
by the suffering and the violence -
74:54 - 74:57and the pain that we know that a
lot of people are dealing with -
74:58 - 74:59thank you so much
-
75:17 - 75:20yes, that's a very important question
-
75:20 - 75:26in terms of the amount of information
that we should expose ourselves to -
75:29 - 75:33the important thing is, maintaining
compassion in our heart -
75:35 - 75:39but more practically,
I think our human mind is not meant to -
75:39 - 75:43actually be constantly bombarded
with so much suffering -
75:45 - 75:48you hear it in your car or your subway,
you're driving here -
75:49 - 75:51you hear it in the morning,
you hear it while you take a break -
75:52 - 75:55in the afternoon you hear it,
I mean when I was driving in L.A. -
75:57 - 76:00an hour and a half to work in the
morning I listened to NPR -
76:00 - 76:06cause people said I should be informed
I have friends from Berkeley you know -
76:09 - 76:12so every time they come back
they always ask me to go to, -
76:13 - 76:15these picket things,
they were good -
76:16 - 76:19it was my way of my getting out of
my anger, now that I remember back -
76:21 - 76:25so, we put so high on a pedestal
'being informed' -
76:26 - 76:32you got to be 'up to date'
but how much more do you want? -
76:35 - 76:38I mean, you hear it in the morning and
then in the afternoon when driving back -
76:38 - 76:40it's the same news, but I keep hearing it
-
76:41 - 76:44before I even get to work,
I'm already angry -
76:47 - 76:49I haven't seen that secretary yet
-
76:51 - 76:55it's a good question, you have to know
how to take care of yourself -
76:57 - 76:59and question the 'being informed',
-
77:00 - 77:04how much should you keep inflicting,
it's a scar you keep picking -
77:05 - 77:10ok, this is a balance you need to find,
each one of us -
77:11 - 77:13in our workplace as well as in society
-
77:17 - 77:24we had a session, two days ago,
with news people, -
77:25 - 77:29it was at the Columbia University for
journalists at the Dart Center -
77:31 - 77:35where they take care of journalists
who have to go to, -
77:39 - 77:44conflicting sites or tragedy,
and then have to report -
77:44 - 77:48and then come back and
they can't handle it, -
77:48 - 77:53so this Dart center was formed
to take care of and bring more awareness -
77:53 - 77:57to the suffering that journalists face
as they come back -
77:57 - 78:02it's kind of like veterans
and I learned a lot from that -
78:03 - 78:07and the Dart Center is trying to bring
more mindfulness and wellness -
78:08 - 78:12to take care of the journalists
'cause after you see these images and -
78:12 - 78:17you've been in places like that
you see, the mind needs healing -
78:18 - 78:20it's kind of like, getting inflicted
-
78:21 - 78:23and you know, that's journalists
-
78:23 - 78:27but we ourselves as readers
we have take care of that as well -
78:28 - 78:31so be informed, be intelligent,
-
78:32 - 78:37but know what you're doing to yourself
and what that is causing -
78:37 - 78:42because that can actually spill out to your
loved ones who had nothing to do with it -
78:43 - 78:46but because you keep watering the seeds,
-
78:47 - 78:50in our practise we call,
we each all have a seed, -
78:51 - 78:58a seed of anger, a seed of discrimination,
a seed of blame and so on -
78:59 - 79:03and if these keep being watered,
you become immobile -
79:03 - 79:10you can't really be an activist
if you are not, like, solid -
79:11 - 79:15so this is something for us all
as we want to change -
79:15 - 79:18and help effect the world in a better way
-
79:18 - 79:22we also need to take care and nourish
our happiness, our joy -
79:24 - 79:27so it's how you say,
pay attention to the mud, -
79:27 - 79:31but don't forget to also pay attention
to the flower, to the lotus -
79:32 - 79:34that's also there
-
79:35 - 79:38so we keep reading books on negativity,
-
79:39 - 79:45and it makes you really,
you can't move and your mind becomes tight -
79:46 - 79:48and you start actually
causing others suffering -
79:48 - 79:50in a way that's toxic
-
79:51 - 79:55so, nothing is lost, everything you read,
everything you come in through the sens, -
79:56 - 80:00the eyes, the things you hear, the conversations I used to have with my friends
-
80:01 - 80:03they didn't make me happier,
they actually made me more angry -
80:04 - 80:07and sometimes anger is useful
-
80:08 - 80:13but as my brother or my sister shared
one time, maybe 5% -
80:14 - 80:18but I'm still trying to figure
how much of that energy -
80:19 - 80:24you know, I know, there's a,
sometimes it's useful to speak out -
80:25 - 80:29but how can we do it in a way
that has a little bit more understanding, -
80:30 - 80:31more compassion
-
80:31 - 80:36more of that sense of
embracing the other person rather than -
80:38 - 80:43so this is what happens
when we get informed -
80:43 - 80:45and it's over our limit
-
80:45 - 80:51we actually start to cause more
trouble than helpful -
80:51 - 80:57and this is each one of us through the
practise of taking care of ourselves, -
80:58 - 81:02nourishing ourselves with good news,
nourishing ourselves with moments -
81:02 - 81:06of actually recognizing
taking a walk in the park -
81:07 - 81:09recognizing, hugging a tree
-
81:11 - 81:16watching, you know, sitting there
in front of a flower and feeling, -
81:16 - 81:18recognizing that flower
-
81:18 - 81:24so these are things that I found helpful
in my practise in terms of engaging the -
81:25 - 81:29world as we travel and we hear people
suffering -
81:30 - 81:33you know, I have to take a walk in nature
after a consultation or something, -
81:34 - 81:39I can't do consultations six right away
'cause my mind is no longer present -
81:40 - 81:41for the third person
-
81:42 - 81:44I mean, it looks like I'm there
but it's too much for me -
81:45 - 81:51so I'd only do one, and then I go take
a nap or I go walk in nature -
81:51 - 81:53and this is just the truth of our mind
-
81:54 - 81:57we're not meant to actually
know everything that's happening -
81:57 - 82:01around the world
I mean, the internet now, you think, oh, -
82:01 - 82:05we have access, but,
look what it's doing to you -
82:07 - 82:14you have access but you're like,
you're afraid, and you're suspicious, -
82:14 - 82:16you're fearful
-
82:16 - 82:20and this, you cannot help the world
in that state of mind -
82:21 - 82:30so please take a look at your, at the balance,
we need balance in terms of information -
82:42 - 82:44we have one last question
-
82:46 - 82:48may we listen to one sound of the bell
-
82:49 - 82:50(sound of the bell)
-
82:51 - 82:57breathing in
everything we need is here and now -
82:59 - 83:01breathing out
we let go -
83:02 - 83:06this moment, without expectation
-
83:09 - 83:13(sound of the bell)
-
83:35 - 83:36Hi there
-
83:40 - 83:43you know, it's kind of intimidating
talking to you guys -
83:44 - 83:47but what I love in the nature
of how you spoke today -
83:48 - 83:52was that you're still embracing
that whole studentness about you -
83:53 - 83:56'cause sometimes when people that don't
live in the kind of environment -
83:57 - 83:58that you live in
-
84:03 - 84:06I guess I'm speaking for myself but I
have talked to a few other people -
84:07 - 84:14there's a way that we can feel not
as spiritual or not as worthy -
84:15 - 84:21and what I love what you brought here was
that you're still learning -
84:22 - 84:27and that you're still figuring it out
and that you're still on your journey -
84:28 - 84:32and that's really inspiring to hear
-
84:32 - 84:37because some of us are a little bit
further back in the road on the journey -
84:38 - 84:43one of the things I do is I go into
companies, into the dark, deep scary -
84:43 - 84:46territory of corporate America
and I try to bring -
84:46 - 84:49a tiny bit of mindfulness with me
-
84:50 - 84:54but what you've inspired me to do today
is, to take it further -
84:54 - 84:58you know, some of the little teachings
or some of the things you said -
84:58 - 85:03like, and I love what you said about
how being right is the root of war -
85:04 - 85:08and how we can bring a little bit of
non-violence to how we talk -
85:09 - 85:12to each other every day
by not trying to be so right -
85:13 - 85:15and trying to be more compassionate
-
85:18 - 85:21trying to be more vulnerable,
which you guys exhibited today, -
85:21 - 85:24the vulnerability of showing
that you don't know it all -
85:24 - 85:26you're still a student,
you're still on your journey -
85:27 - 85:29so I want to thank you for that
and to let you know -
85:29 - 85:35there are warriors out here,
working for the same cause, -
85:35 - 85:39we might not look the same way
that outfit would definitely make me look -
85:39 - 85:42a lot chubbier and that would really
annoy me -
85:43 - 85:47but, you know, we're out here
warriors on the front line, -
85:48 - 85:52with you and supporting you
and loving you from our place, -
85:53 - 85:55so thank you
-
86:03 - 86:04Hi, thank you for being here tonight
-
86:05 - 86:10I've been exploring the value of mindfulness
in organizations and I was wondering if you -
86:10 - 86:12could speak a little bit more about the
benefits that you see -
86:14 - 86:19to bringing mindfulness into workplaces
and I'm particularly interested in -
86:20 - 86:22how it might help to build trust
-
86:49 - 86:55For me, being a monastic is
something I always wanted to do -
86:56 - 86:59but in another way this,
-
86:59 - 87:02I agree with my brother,
there's challenges -
87:03 - 87:08so when I entered the community
you know, I love to do art, -
87:08 - 87:14to sing songs and write poetry
but I've always been asked to do things -
87:14 - 87:23that is out of the ordinary
you know, is not my field, is not my, -
87:25 - 87:28I feel like it's not even my capacity
-
87:28 - 87:34but recently, the sangha invited me
to join the finance team and -
87:35 - 87:41to work with all these figures,
and it's not what I imagined I would do -
87:42 - 87:48so I think the practise of mindfulness
just helps me to just be present -
87:49 - 87:56and to take things as they are
and not to have expectation or -
87:57 - 88:02to have to struggle with it
-
88:03 - 88:06at first I struggled a lot,
but I feel like -
88:06 - 88:11when I can just come back to my breathing
just to be what it is, I can just let it go -
88:12 - 88:17and whatever comes, I learn from it
and I build my experience on it -
88:18 - 88:25so I think that in the workplace,
we can apply mindfulness -
88:26 - 88:30for instance, when I am working
on something that is very challenging -
88:31 - 88:34for my brainwork
-
88:34 - 88:37then I just take a deep breath
and come back and smile, -
88:37 - 88:41and take a break
and we have the time-out on a screen -
88:41 - 88:46or a bell of mindfulness that we
install into the PC or the computer -
88:47 - 88:51and we just take a break, you know
you close your eyes and breathe -
88:51 - 88:53and then smile
-
88:53 - 88:58and I find that also working in a team
or in a group is very helpful -
88:58 - 89:03because I see that I have my brothers and
sisters who have experience in finance -
89:03 - 89:06and they have all kinds of experiences
-
89:07 - 89:10and when we come together,
we really make things work -
89:10 - 89:13without, you know, one having
to think too hard -
89:14 - 89:18so I think that try to learn from the
experience of the others -
89:19 - 89:21and be mindful, be open
-
89:22 - 89:25and, you know, things can
become easier that way -
89:26 - 89:28rather than taking on everything
on ourselves -
89:30 - 89:35and also create a space for nurturing
brotherhood and sisterhood -
89:36 - 89:42in our monastery, at Blue Cliff,
when we have finance meeting, -
89:42 - 89:47I'm always the team-master
I make sure, I prepare tea and bring some -
89:47 - 89:53snacks and cookies or some healthy snacks
and then we start the meeting that way -
89:53 - 89:57we don't just start by saying
'ok, what's the agenda' -
89:57 - 90:01of course somebody will say that,
but I always do the tea part first -
90:03 - 90:08and it's so light and nourishing and then
people feel like, oh, there's a connection -
90:08 - 90:15you are here for being together, it's
not just about trying to work something out -
90:15 - 90:19or trying to go forward with the result,
-
90:20 - 90:25so I think that teamwork and nourishing
brotherhood, sisterhood -
90:26 - 90:30and to build the energy of mindfulness,
-
90:30 - 90:32to share that together is very helpful
-
90:33 - 90:34thank you
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