Bic Pens for Women

It's hard to believe, but Bic has a new line of pens, just for women. See what Ellen had to say about them!

So, uh, you know on my show,

what I like to do

is I like to promote kindness

and equal rights.

And I don't like labels and I don't see color;

I'm like a cocker spaniel in that way.

And I don't like pointing out differences

between people, especially men and women.

And I-I thought that women, we-we-we've made

a lot of progress towards equality.

And we-we're allowed to vote and,

I think, since 1982, now, and

we can wear pants.

We can drive at night.

All of those things have happened.

And then I saw something that makes me think

we still have a little bit, uh, ways to go.

It's a new product from Bic, the pen company,

and they have a new line of pens

called "Bic for Her".

And this is totally real.

They're pens just for ladies.

I know what you're thinking.

It's about damn time!

Where have our pens been?

Can you believe this?

We've been using "man pens" all these years.

Yuck!

And they come in both lady colors: pink and purple.

And they're just like regular pens

except they're pink so they cost twice as much.

That is absolutely true, as well.

The worst part is they don't come

with any instructions

so, like, how do they expect us to write with them,

you know?

I was reading the back of the pack-well,

I had a man read the back of the package

to me.

And it said it's "designed to fit a woman's hand".

This is all true.

I'm not making any of this up.

"Designed to fo-fit a woman's hand"

what does that mean?

Like, so when we're taking down dictation

from our bosses we'll feel comfortable

and we'll forget we're not getting paid as much?

I don't know.

I mean, just think over the last 20 years,

companies have spent millions of dollars

making pills that grow men's hair

and fix men's sex lives

and now ladies have a pen.

Wow!

We have-we have come a long way, baby!

It's so ridiculous.

And they called to ask me

to be their spokesperson, and I was outraged!

I said I would never do a commercial for you.

And then they said how much they'd pay me

and was like, okay.

So here's the commercial we shot.

Oh, what's wrong sweetie?

I don't know.

Sometimes I just feel...different.

That's because you're growing up.

I think it's time we have that talk...

the pen talk.

But, I can't handle those man pens.

That's why you need the new "Bic for Her" pen.

There's a pen for women?

There is now.

They're built strong enough for a man

but simple enough

that even a woman can understand
how to use them.

Here's how it works.

When you have an opinion,

you write it down on a piece of paper

and then crumble it up and throw it away,

because no one wants to know our opinion, sweetheart.

Wow! What else could we do

with a "Bic for Her " pen?

Well, you can use it to write down

a grocery list, or

even recipes for when you need

to feed your man.

And it's indestructible so it'll stand up

to all of your wild mood swings.

It's so pretty.

It's the only pen for ladies you'll ever need.

I can use it when I become president.

Oh, right!

You're silly.

We should get back now.

Okay.

Come on, girl.

(Announcer) "Bic for Her" pens.

For best result, use while barefoot and pregnant.

We should jog.

We need to burn off some of those calories.

Keep fit.

Come on, let's go.

Come on, let's go.

Come on, come on, come on girl.

Come on girl, come on.

Atta girl.

Oh.

Wow!

I wish my mom woulda talked to me

about lady pens.