Prioritizing in the Busy Seasons of Our Lives - Ask Pastor Tim

This comes from Leah.

She says, "I don't have
one specific question for you.

It's more of a situation
that my husband and I

are just really becoming
very discouraged by."

Now, you've got to follow this one.

"We've been Christians for about 7 years.

We've seen God work
so much in our lives

and has brought us
through many difficulties.

We made many financial
mistakes in our early 20's

that we are now paying for.

My husband works 50 plus hours per week

and we are paycheck to paycheck.

I stay at home with our three boys,

ages 2 and 7 month old twins

who were born 11 weeks premature

and have some extra needs.

We're struggling both with time and money.

Soon my husband may need to

get a second job.

I spend the entire day
bouncing back and forth

between different kids' needs,

trying and often failing
at minimally keeping up

with the house, laundry, and cooking.

But the biggest problem here is that

we have less and less time for prayer,

reading the Word,

going to Bible studies,

evangelism, our marriage, etc.

We've cut out all
luxuries like television,

going out to dinner,

and other things for both time and money.

We've been praying for a very long time

for help in paying off debt

and for an income source

for my husband that doesn't require

quite so much time away from home

at both the job and the drive time.

While in all other areas
that we've prayed for

we have felt His presence

and have seen answers in
one way or another,

this is one area that
we just feel He is quiet.

I struggle with praying for issues

related to money because I spent years

in a megachurch that focused
too much on money,

in addition to other major flaws,

so I am very apprehensive in praying

for this area of our lives.

We don't want our prayers answered

so we can add luxuries
back into our lives.

We see how God is using this time

to strip us of things that have brought

sin into our lives and
hindered our walk with Him.

We just want more time to spend with God

to grow spiritually,

to grow in our marriage

and to be able to pour into our children.

Right now, I just feel like
we are simply existing.

We use the time we have to put

a sermon on in the background

while taking care of the kids,

and my husband uses his drive time

and his lunch hour to pray.

But we don't have the time to

cry out to Him for all
that we need to pray for:

for our family, for church needs,

for this nation, for missionaries,

for our children's salvation,

and to be spending uninterrupted time

learning and memorizing His Word.

We just need some encouragement,

direction and prayer.

I want to be sure that I
understand the difference

in His Word about
praying for spiritual things

versus supernatural things.

I've listened to sermons and read
about prayer many times,

but I want to be sure to be praying
for these things in a way

that is honoring to God.

Thank you, Leah."

So, you kind of get the gist?

Anything jump out at you?

(from the room)

Maybe experientially, it sounds like

listening to sermons,

or maybe even reading books -

it can be very hard,

especially for a mother

to be hearing a pastor
talking about praying

and long times of praying,

and then a mother trying
to assimilate that

into her life with three children

and kind of feel like I'm not doing it.

I can't do what they're saying,

and feel like she's not doing enough,

which sort of sounds
like that's the problem.

It sounds like she's pressing on,

but she has this high standard

that maybe has been created by

hearing of great missionaries in the past

or some sermon.

Tim: Yeah, it's interesting.

She says that her husband
uses his drive time.

Now, she first said that her husband

is working 50 plus hours

plus the drive time,

which makes you think that
the drive time is fairly significant.

And then she says he's using
his drive time for prayer

and his lunch hours,

but she says that she lacks -

"we don't have the time to cry out to Him

for all that we need to pray for:

for family, church needs, nation,

missionaries, children's salvation..."

And you know the reality is,

(incomplete thought)

if you use - I don't know how
much of the lunch hour,

but if you use the majority of
an hour at lunch for prayer -

let's say you bring your lunch;

you pack it, you bring it with you,

you take some time to eat it.

You could easily give a half
hour to devoted prayer.

And let's assume he's driving
a half hour each way.

I suspect that Christian men

who give an hour and a half

to dedicated prayer is
probably the exception.

And so, yeah, I think you're right.

I think her standard -

she may desire something

that she feels like she's
not able to accomplish,

but the truth is we do often
get into certain chapters

of our life where there are needs -

especially when there's children.

What we all have to do is prioritize.

And life is changing all the time.

You talk to R.L.

R.L. getting a mechanical
engineering degree.

This portion of his life looks different.

You talk to my wife.

From about the time that
we had the four children

until the youngest child
got to five or six years old

where the oldest was actually

significantly able to
start really helping out,

that time in her life is far different

from this time in her life.

The thing is, there was a time

when I was seeking to plant a church

down in Stockdale, TX,

and I was the primary guy down there.

I was doing the preaching.

I was leading the prayer meeting.

I was leading the evangelism.

I had a full time secular position.

And I had a full time family.

And so life looks different

in different chapters of our life.

That's just the way it is.

And what you have to do is prioritize.

Many of you know about Susannah Wesley

and all the children she had.

What? Upwards of 20?

And this lady has three.

And I'm not diminishing the
difficulty of having three -

especially twins, but when you have 20...

There are ladies historically

who have walked with Christ

and what would she do?

She would put her apron over her head.

She would choose those choice times.

One of the godliest men
you could read about

is John G. Paton's father.

He would go into an inner
room in the house.

He had a business right there

in his home,

and at lunch time he would go in there

and he would pray.

And they would hear him just crying out

on behalf of their souls.

You know, we have to prioritize.

The Lord doesn't expect us

to do what we can't do.

But He does expect us to do

everything we're supposed to do.

And you need to capture that thought.

If God has given you ten responsibilities

in your life, He expects you to take care

of those ten responsibilities
in your life.

But the thing is,

prayer may be one aspect of that.

The time you spend in the Word

may be one aspect of that.

But at that certain time in your life,

you also have to balance
the other 8 things.

He doesn't expect you
to pray 24 hours a day.

He doesn't expect you to
pray all your waking hours.

In fact, there is a time

when praying would be wrong.

You can go to work for somebody.

This very man, if he thought,

I need to pray more,

and so you know what I'm going to do?

Aside from my lunch break,

I'm going to sneak away at different times

and find a secluded closet somewhere

that I can go pray,

and his boss would not
think that's a good thing.

And I don't believe God would
think that's a good thing.

You say, he needs to pray.

We need more prayer.

No, not at that time you don't.

If you do need more prayer,

then there needs to be
proper prioritization.

One thing is you need to sleep too,

and if you're not well slept,

you're not going to
give your employer

the kind of time that you need
to be able to give to him.

So, I would also say this.

There seemed like this woman

had a hesitation to pray

because of some experience
she had at a megachurch.

She had a hesitation to pray for money.

It's almost like, we
pray for spiritual things,

and God answers us,

but we're kind of hesitant
to pray about this.

It's kind of like coming
out of a background

where you have this
mindset that sex is dirty.

And now suddenly you're saved,

and you want to cast that off.

God created that.

Or you have this idea, you know,

miracles or whatever - that's charismatic.

But wait a second, what we have to do

is we have to look again at Scripture.

Scripture has to guide us.

Would Scripture ever indicate to us

that praying for financial things;

asking God to supply our needs

is carnal or secular or unspiritual?

It's interesting this lady's saying

we know lots of answers to our prayer,

but it just seems like this area -

she's admitting we don't really pray.

We're not getting the kind of answers

that we want, but we're
not really even asking.

And I would say to somebody like that,

well, you need to ask.

Why would you not ask?

Especially when she's emphasizing,

well, look, it's not that
we want luxuries.

It's that we don't want my husband

to be working 50 plus hours

and now maybe even have
to find a second job

for us to make ends meet.

I would say this,

you definitely want to pray.

I think they ought to be praying about -

she didn't say anything
about their giving,

but I do know that Scripturally,

I'm often drawn to the text

that says there's one who
gives more than he ought,

and the thing is it seems that he only

becomes all the more richer.

Then you have somebody that withholds

what they shouldn't withhold.

And it tends only to their penury

as the KJV says - poverty.

And so I would say this,

give sacrificially and then pray.

Here's the reality.

In fact, I would encourage this woman.

I've found great help and I know many have

in our church, especially
in the early days,

often quoted from Isaiah 53.

But in Isaiah 53, there are promises there

about you pouring yourself
out for the hungry;

you giving to the needy,

(chapter 58, not 53)

Isaiah 58.

And the promise there is this:

that when you cry,

God's going to say, "Here I am."

And I have always found that to be

a great argument in prayer.

Lord, we've given.

Lord, we've given. We've
sought to be sacrificial.

We've sought to pay our debts.

We've sought to help the needy.

We've sought to support the family.

After all, if you don't
support your family, what?

Worse than an infidel.

So, God wants you to support your family.

God wants you to give to
the needs of the needy.

God wants you to pay your debt.

I can show you texts that
say all three of those.

And so if you're doing what God

wants you to do with the money

and now you're running out,

you have every reason to come and say,

Lord, You promised to supply all my need.

You've promised.

And You've promised
that if I would be merciful,

that when I cry, You'll say, "Here I am."

And Jesus talking about storing up

treasure in heaven.

And see, I don't want to stretch this

where it ought not to go, but listen.

I think because of texts like Isaiah 58,

I have reason to believe that this fits

into the words that Jesus said.

When He talks about storing
up treasure in heaven -

not storing up here.

So my mindset is this.

I'm going to strive to
not build empires here.

I'm going to strive not to
build up huge savings here.

I'm going to strive not to build
up huge retirement here,

but rather I'm going to store it there.

And then when I come to have needs here,

I'm going to look and say,

Lord, I stored it all there.

I don't have anything here

and I have a need over here.

When I'm thinking about storing up

treasure in heaven, I'm not just

thinking about when I die,

I'm going to go to heaven

and there's going to be treasure there.

Now, obviously, that is a primary emphasis

of what Jesus is saying there

in the Sermon on the Mount.

But, I also believe that storing up

treasure in heaven carries the reality

that that's where my surplus is.

That's where my supply is.

And I'm storing it up there

just kind of like putting it in the bank,

but I'm storing it there.

I'm giving it to the Lord.

I'm trusting Him.

Not just that there's going to be

treasure there when I die and get there,

but that there's treasure there

to be drawn on anytime
that I need it here.

And like I say, I take that from promises

like, "You'll call and
I'll say, 'Here I am.'"

I take it from the promises of God

concerning finances,

that both are a reality.

That what I'm doing is

I'm storing up and there's a promise

in my storing up there that when I

come to have need here,

God's going to meet it.

When it's a need,

and He sees it as a need -

not just when I want my
standard of living increased.

Not when it's something that
He doesn't think I need,

but I think I need.

See, that's one of the problems.

We like to put it in the bank

because see, then I can tap that

when I think I have a need.

Sometimes it has to do
with trusting the Lord.

If we give it all to Him,

well, what if I'm in need
and He doesn't give me.

But you know what I have found

is He always does.

He always does.

(incomplete thought)

I have typically found,

even when it's things that seem

really practical - like
that just makes sense

that we should have that -

He provides for it.

Even though I had no
funds there before that

or very little.

I mean, yes, I'm 52 years old

and I live paycheck to paycheck.

But, we are seeking to store up

treasure in heaven,

and I really have confidence

that the Lord is going to provide

whenever there's need,

even if that's retirement.

And the thing is, I can tell you this,

that I've walked with
the Lord for 26 years

and He hasn't let me down once.

He hasn't failed me.

So I would say that to this lady.

One of the things that
you don't want to do

when you're in financial difficulty

is stop giving.

Now, look, I'm not saying,

well how much did they give?

I would just say this.

Let the highly praised,

highly commended Macedonians

be your example when you're in straits.

They gave liberally.

They amazed even an apostle.

I would say that.

Go to 2 Corinthians 8-9.

Right there in 8, you've got the example

of the Macedonians.

Let them be an example.

Give something in the spirit of that.

Take care of your family.

Take care of your debt.

And look to the Lord

and call upon the Lord

and ask the Lord to provide.

She's admitting that she hasn't prayed

because of this megachurch mindset

that's been pressed upon her -

something like the love of money

is the root of all evil,

and sometimes we get it in our heads

that money is the root of all evil.

Well, we need money.

There's a place for money

so that dad can be with the family more.

There is a place for that.

Any other thoughts on that?

(from the room)

I think one thing that stood out as well

is that she said that through this time

and season in their life,

that it's made her more like Christ;

or at least, it's shown
her and her husband

their sin in their lives.

And I think there's a certain aspect

of thinking about just
embracing the suffering.

And I hope I don't sound
apathetic in any way,

but I think there's room
to embrace it in some way

where texts such as James and 1 Peter,

and just seeing that our suffering

makes us more like Christ.

And it helps us not to
settle in here on earth.

And it really just fixes our
mind on heaven, basically.

That's just my thought.

Tim: Right. Embrace it.

And there may be a place for that.

Because the reality is working 50 hours -

even though that might
not be what you want,

and you might want more time with dad

being with the children,

especially when they're at a certain age

and you know having
devotions and everything.

But you know what?

Working 50 or 60 hours a week is not bad.

And it sounds to me like they are

giving up some of the non-essentials

in their life, and that they do

actually have reasonable time.

She said it feels like
they're just existing,

but perhaps that's because certain things,

certain endeavors that
they would like to have

in their life that God's just
now allowing them right now.

Maybe they're putting too much

of a high priority on.

And very often, we do get into situations

where things are tight.

When our children were small,

the amount Ruby had to spend on food

was extremely tight.

But you know, there are seasons like that.

And certain Christians
in certain countries,

we might say there's lives like that.