SURGEON SIMULATOR (CO-OP) (REACT: Gaming)

♪ (old-school video game music) ♪

- Cooking game?
- (laughing) Surgeon Simulator.

That's a heart, not a tomato, Shannon.

- Surgeon Simulator. Oh boy.
- That looks fun.

- This is another really
super rage-inducing game.

These guys also made "I Am Bread".

- Have you seen this?

- I don't know anything about it.
- Okay, you operate on a virtual person.

- (Finebros) Today, you're going
to be working together

to control one of two hands
to perform a heart transplant.

- Okay! Let's do it.

- At least we're in this together.
- Yeah.

- We'll kill them together. (laughs)
- Yeah.

(EKG machine beeps)
♪ (funky synthpop) ♪

- This is intense music.

(phone rings)
- Hello.

- I can't go up and down.
I can only go side to side.

(phone rings)
Oh, hello! I'm touching stuff.

- I'm the right hand.
- Oh, can I point? How do I point?

I can point.
- Wait, can I grab this?

- No, that's grab.
- Wait, are you gonna tell us the controls?

- (Finebros) If you go
to the monitor on the left,

you'll see the controls.
- Oh, okay.

- "Rotate wireless controller." Whoa!

- So R1-- oh, I think that's yours.

- R1 is... pinch.

- Do you want to try
to give each other a high five?

Ready? All right.
Wait, my guy keeps going down.

All right.

♪ (catchy synthpop) ♪

(strained groan) Yeah!
- (laughing) Yeah!

- All right.
- That's a real life high five.

- Yeah, there we go.

(both laugh)

- Patient name is Bob. That's original.

(phone rings)
- Oh, go, Bob.

- We got you, bro.

- We're doing a heart transplant.

♪ (music becomes muffled, slowly fades) ♪
- Ooh.

I feel like we just took drugs.
- (laughing) Oh my god.

- Oh no.
- Oh gosh.

- Let's take this off. Let's...
- Grab that first.

(heart thumps)
- Come on. Go down.

- Go down and--
- Okay, voilà!

- All right, let's remove this--
- It's just so casual.

"Okay, perform a heart transplant."

- Honestly, hearts freak me out.
- They do?

- Yes.
- It's what keeps us living.

- Come on.
Okay, go down.

(grumbles) Did he die?!

- No, I grabbed anaesthesia.

This is trippy.
Why did you do this?

- Oh, let's use a hammer, obviously.
- Yeah, can we?

- How are we gonna break the ribs though?

Oh, the hammer!
- The hamm-- (laughs).

Don't worry.

I graduated medical school.
- I got this!

- Do you want to hammer him?
- I'm sorry.

Um, yeah, I wanna hammer him.
- (giggles) Okay.

- That does not sound right.

- How do you do a heart transplant?

- Should we--?
- Shannon, there's a bone saw over here.

- Pinch.
- Okay, I got the bone saw.

- Take this rib cage.

Am I breaking something?
- Yeah, I think you are.

I'm trying to grab it from you,
with my other hand.

- Oh here. Yeah, break it.
I mean grab it. Okay.

- Wait, don't move it yet.

- All right, do you have it?
- Yes.

- Nice!
- Shhh--

- Oh!
- Firmly grasp it!

What?!
- Oh, I got it!

I'll catch it.

Did I catch it?
- No, you didn't.

- Aww!

- Wait, I'm really trying
to pick up this saw.

- You have to go lower, I think.

(saw clinks)
Oh, how do I readjust

this angle?
- I got it!

- Oh. Oh, come on!

Wait, really?
- Wait, how do you do it?

- You have to use the--
- Oh, no way! Okay.

- Then...grab-- grab it!
(instruments clink)

(growling)

- We got some ribs.
- (laughing) He's bleeding!

(overlapping speech and laughter)

- Okay, cut open the ribs.
- I dropped it.

(laughing) I dropped it on his ribs
and I can't pick it up.

I dropped it.
What the heck?

Pick it up. Come on, come on, come on!

Okay, I got it.

- Argh!
- I cut you!

- You cut me!

- Is the drill still going?

♪ (music becomes distorted and fades) ♪
- Did he die?

- Oh, we lost him.

- We just hit ourselves with those needles.

We just drugged ourselves.

- And then we have
to go underneath the lungs, I think.

- Oh, a drill! Yes, here we go.

- That-- that seems safe.
- This is the perfect--

(drill whirs)
- I'll just pat him down in the meantime.

(drilling bones)
- Just get into your...

there we go. (laughing)
Well, it's working.

♪ (music becomes distorted and fades) ♪

- Oh! Who's the boss!
- You are!

Just cut the bones.

Gentle. (gasps) You got one!

Okay, keep going.

(saw whirs)
- Oh wait. There's the heart!

The heart's right there.
- Oh, that's the heart

we're trying to put in there.

- Wait, what's this? What's this?

- Um, there's the heart. That's the heart.

- You're just gonna puncture his lungs.
- Yep.

- And there's no point of him living.
- Where is the heart?

How much blood does he have?

Oh, he is out of blood.
- Oh, we're dying!

(both laugh)

- Grab it!
- YARGH!

(whimpering) Get out, get out.

Okay, I got it. I got it.
- Do I have it? I think I have it.

- Ooh, press these buttons.
(sickly crack)

- He's in a better place.
♪ (sad music) ♪

- "Surgery failed."
Aw, it was going so well.

- (laughing) Yeah!
(sarcastically) It was going great.

- Look at his rib.

I'm destroying his ribs.
- Oh good!

- (splutters) Oh no, wait! No!

Oh, his blood level is going down. Okay.

Let's get the heart.
- Yeah, yeah.

Put that heart in there.
(EKG machine beeps frantically)

- (laughing) He's about to die.

The blood level is going down.

- (laughing) Give him the shot.

Maybe it'll make him live longer.

Well, he probably has--
(sickly crack)

- "Brutal murder achieved in
a mere 5 minutes and 32.725 seconds."

- We didn't murder him.

- Let's move the box.

Push, push, push, push, push!

♪ (music becomes distorted) ♪
- I can't even open the box.

There we go!
- Hwah! Hwah!

- Oh my god!
- I dropped the heart!

- You dropped the heart!
- Shannon, what is that?

- That's a drill.
- That doesn't look like a drill.

- [Inaudible].
- Oh my gosh!

And he's losing lots of blood. Stop!

You're stabbing the guy.

We dropped the heart.
Like, what are we supposed to do?

(gasps)
- None of this--

- I'm so sorry, Bob.
- None of this "we" business.

YOU...
- Excuse me?!

♪ (sad music) ♪
- (both) "Brutal murder achieved."

- That's not murder.
He died on the table.

- Oh. I--
- There we go.

- All right, we got it. All right.

(laughter)

- Oh, okay.
- The rib's over here.

- Okay, now I just gotta rid of this lung.

It might be an anaesthetic.
Yeah, try that.

Just pop it on in there.
- Come on. Okay.

- Yeah, you slid it down. Nice.
- It's in there. Whatever.

- Nice. Oh, that's gone.

Hang on, I'm trying to break this bitch.

(stammering) Get in there!

- Okay, you work on that.

I'll--
(organ squishes)

Oh god! Oh god!

Oh, that's a removed lung.

Everyone needs some
orange soda in their system.

- Wait-- shit, I think
I'm pulling out his lung.

Oh! Got it out.
Alrighty then.

- I already took out one--
- I took out the other.

- He might be dead by now.
- Who needs lungs?

- Maybe if he has two hearts,
he'll just be even better off.

We'll just shove this in there.
Now he has two hearts.

- (chuckles) Done.
- Look, I got a channel!

I mean, I got a trophy.

- We're about to lose this man.

Oh, I can save him!
- Yeah, there you go.

Put it in his face.
Put it in his face.

- Gah!

Ah, shit, I just increased it.

Oh no!
- Oh.

- I killed him.
- Okay.

I don't know if that could've gone worse.

- (Finebros) We're gonna
give you one more chance.

- Okay.

- So I'm gonna break the ribs off,

and you're gonna put the heart in him.

- Do you just crack
the ribs, put the heart in,

and then put the ribs back together?

- I don't know.

- I think we're gonna communicate better.
- Yeah.

- That's what we're gonna do.
- For sure.

- Let's get this.
- (anxious sigh)

- Let's just get this
completely out of the way.

- Why is there a coffee mug--?

♪ (music becomes distorted) ♪

What the hell?

(laughing) What just happened?

- Oh my gosh. Did we give ourselves...
- (giggling)

- ...the anaesthesia?
- Anaesthesia?

- If this actually happened in real life,

I would scream, "Help."

- Megan, can we just get the ribs out?

- Okay, let's get the ribs out. Bone saw.

(saw buzzes)
Okay, I've got the bone saw.

Just...
(grinding bone)

(blood splatters)
Ooh! That's not--

(anxiously) Ooh! Pick it up!

(laughter)

AAAAH!

- I'm just patting him while--
- I'm trying to be so careful.

Yeah, just pat him. That helps.

(chipping bone)

Okay.
- One more.

(chipping bone)
Okay.

- Nice!
- Whew.

- I feel like I should get
another tool and help you.

- You should.

Oh my gosh, this is so hard!

(chipping bone)
- (breathily) Okay.

- There you go.
- Okay.

- Move on to the next part.
- (squeals) Oh, no, no, no!

- Did you just drop it inside him?
- It's--

- Oh, okay, it landed on his bone.

We got really lucky.

- Grab the big thing of ribs.

- Got it.
- All right.

- Just throw it away.

- Okay, and then rip those lungs out.

(strained grunts)
(organs squish)

- I think it's-- I'm forcing it out.

(organs squish)
Oh.

- Oh, we lost it.
All right. (laughs)

It lost it in it's--
- Ghost lung.

Okay. There we go.
And my watch is off.

- We have to get rid of the ribs
and then move the lungs.

- So let me get the bone saw.

- Come on. You can do it.

There you go! There you go!

Okay, I'll make sure you're-- wow.

- This won't hurt a bit.
- Oh my god. Okay.

(organs squish)
(Mikaela gasps)

- Oh! That did something.
- What'd you do?

Okay. Put your tools down.

Put the tools--
- Wait, no! I can see the heart now.

I can see the heart now.
Do you see it beating?

- We're losing blood!
Put the thing down!

- No, wait! I need to cut
out more of the lung.

- Can we stop the bleeding first?
- Uh...

- (testily) Put the tool down!
- Yeah, I can't move!

I want to put it down over there,
away from the sedatives.

- Ooh, we need to grab the sedative now.
- I know.

I really don't want to drug myself.

(sharp gasp)
- Okay, ready?

- Okay.
- Just puncture him.

Like, in the lung.

- Did I do it?
- No.

(organs squish)
- Ooh! Ooh! That's his lung.

(laughs) That is his lung.

Wait, wait.
- I'm pretty sure he's lost--

- Oh! Oh! We drugged him.

- (snickering) This is gonna go so badly.

Eeeh... I see, like, that one spot.

(groans)
(heart thumps)

- Oh, I did it!
- Oh! Oh, okay!

- Be careful, Shannon!

(laughing) Don't sever his lungs.

SHANNON! (giggling)

Shannon! [Inaudible].

Move, Shannon!
(breathless laughter)

He's dead. He's dead!

She dropped the bone saw on the guy,

and we're losing
over 56 milliliters a second.

I'm gonna just stab you!

- Bob, I'm so sorry.

You had a loving family.

- When we were tripping on anaesthesia,

we lasted four minutes longer.

- He's about to die.
- Okay.

- Go get the heart.
- I'm trying to be here for you.

- Get the heart.
- I'm trying to--

Wait, but we have to take out
the other heart first.

- Can we pull out his lungs?

- Oh, shoot!
- Come over here. I can't see.

Oh my god! Did you drop the heart?
- Yeah.

That was by complete accident.
- Oh my--

- Maybe if I wasn't on drugs right now!

They should give us real arms to use,

and then actually do it.
- Use the Power Glove?

- Yeah, the Power Glove.

- Pull out his stuff.

♪ (music becomes slow and distorted) ♪

Oh, look at it!
I pulled his lung out.

-Take that out. Take that out.

- I got one lung out.
- Okay, perfect.

- Get the other--
okay, I'll get the other one.

Okay, I got it. I got it.
- Okay.

Okay, so there's--
- Oh my gosh! The heart's about to fall.

- Did I just cut out--

- The esophagus-- with what?

We already dropped everything.
- There's a scalpel!

- Where? Oh, there they are.

You got this.

- I'm slicing the heart.
I'm just going in for it.

(organs squish)
Oop, I sliced a little bit of the lung.

- Just keep slicing.
It's cool. It's cool.

Slice and dice.

- Cut. Cut. Cut.

Cut--
- Oh! Oh!

- Okay, we got it.
We got it. We got it. We got it.

I'll get that thing out of there.

- Do we have to cut the veins?

- Oh, wait.

We probably can't just rip
the heart out, can we?

- Would you want to put the heart over here,

then you'd--
- We have no time.

- He's gonna die in 100 milliliters.

- Dang.

We got a lot farther.

- We did better on the drugs

than we did not on the drugs.

- Legalize marijuana.

- Oh yeah! Just get in there! (laughing)

- Oh no! Really? Really?

- Grab the sedative!!!

- We don't need it. It's too late.

He's still drugged.

(seriously) It's all up to me.
- It is.

- ♪ Doo-doo, doo doo-doo ♪

♪ Doo-doo ♪
- The top's kinda-- remember to tilt.

- Yeah, I am.
- And just--

ooh, you cut something!

Darn it. We just killed him.

I guess that's why doctors
call it their "practice".

- (laughing) Oh g--

- That's always made me very uncomfortable.

Like, I'm not practiced.

- I only got the stomach out.

- Okay, I see a trash can.
(organ squishes)

(sharp exhale)

Oh, that didn't go in.

Get ready to grab it.
I'm gonna cut it.

Okay.
- All right. Go for it.

- Oh, I'm cutting him.

Okay, well, let's give him drugs.

- No, I think we should save the drugs

until it gets really bad.

- I think it's getting pretty bad.

Okay.
- But I think it's the wrong one.

- Is it?
- I think it's the other one.

- We'll just try it.
- Yeah, shit! Holy shit!

- Oh god! Oh god!
We just messed up.

We just messed up so bad.
- Grab the other one.

- Where is it? Where is it?
- Right there.

- The green one?
- Yes.

(glass tinkles)
- Oh my god!

Okay, we gotta go quick.
- Ah, shit.

- Grrrrrrr, no!
We were doing so well!

- I know.

- You're stabbing the heart.

(heart thumps)
(groans)

- You got it!
- Go! Go! Go! Go! Go!

- Okay. I can't grab it!

Just come here.
To come grandpa.

- You got it?
Now what? Now what?

- Drop it in there.
- Now what?

Wait, now what?

Wait- no, actually, what do we do?

- I think we have to put it back in order.

(laughter)

- This is--
- We got it!

- It looks fine to me.

- We did it.
- We did it!

We did it.
- Okay--

- We did it.

It's unbelievable how accomplished I feel.

- It's great. This is a very rewarding game.

- Thanks for watching this episode
of gaming on the React channel.

- Comment what games
you want us to play next.

- Subscribe or this patient
might bleed out on the operating table!

- Bye! Can't wait for med school.

♪ (old-school video game music) ♪