HELLUVA BOSS - Spring Broken // S1: Episode 3

I love this song!

You were a spicy little...uh...demon with

bleach blonde hair...

Fiendin' for some semen when I caught your stare

Thought it might be love but you went too far

Holy shit!

Oh you “suck for life”, do ya?!

Hop out, you unoriginal pink cum dump!

You have three goddamn seconds

to get your dick out of my parking spot…

Oh shit!

Verosika?

Blitzo.

I should have known you’d be here

I could smell fish for miles

Which is odd because I believe the nearest ocean is…

Three rings down!

And I should have known you’d be here

when I heard the Amber Alerts

Oh yeah? I’m surprised they let your fat ass out of rehab

I can see you’re still a drunken whore

clutching onto that beelzejuice bottle

like it’s the last cock in Hell

They let me out because I’m still famous

and rehab is for sad, loser wash-ups

So your sister says hi

Why are you parking here?

This is the only parking spot my company has

So take your tampon race car somewhere else

Actually prick, it has my name on it

I’m doing a bit of freelance

for one of the infinitely more successful

companies in the building

No way

...to lead their team during spring break

A week?!

No, no, you are not parking here for a fucking week!

Aw, you mad, Blitzo?

You gonna run off, leaving someone else

to pay for the hotel room

steal their car and

run three rings to Wrath and back

and max my credit cards on shitty horse riding lessons?!

God dammit whore, you will not let that go!

Choke on a sandpaper cock

Hold on!

You better move that pussy wagon right now or I’m gonna…

You’ll what?

Or I’ll…um…I’ll call HR

Anyway, meet my new Hellhound, Vortex

Unlike you, he actually does his job well

Ta ta, fuck stain

Ugh, I wasted so much time with a bag of holes like that

You know Verosika Mayday?!

Huh. Oh yeah, her, yeah, we dated

Was it before or after she became a pop star?

You dated a popstar?!

Okay, why are you all acting like that’s such a shock?

Hello. It’s Verosika Mayday?

It’s you?

I just…Is she blind?

Suffering some form of brain damage?

Okay look, you are all making this

into a way bigger deal than it needs to be

I don’t pry into your stupid personal lives

You do that all the time, sir!

What was sex with her like?

Millie!

What?! It’s a pop star!

You’d wanna to know what sex with Michael Crawford was like

Touché

Okay look, let’s just drop it!

Millie, find a temporary spot for that truck, okay?

Loony, Moxxie, let’s go handle this shit

Fuck! I did my makeup shitty today

Oh you look perfect, Loony. Like always

Oh shut up da-...urgh!

…Blitzo!

Oh. Whoa.

Hey, big man

Where’s your bitch bag of an employer?

She’s in her office

There wasn’t room on the sucking floor

so they rented one here on this one

It’s way cheaper

Oh come on!

Sorry, man

Oh no you don’t, bitch

Sir, how about you let me go in and try to reason with her?

I don’t really listen to what’s classified as “pop genre” music

so her status to me is…

Moxxie, shut the fuck up

All righty then

Hello Miss Verosika, was it?

I work for I.M.P. and it is actually rather important for us

to retain the singular parking space we were assigned because…

Aw look at the little one. He’s got a wittle bow tie

Please don’t condescend me, ma’am. I...

Wanna kiss, you little guy?

A...kind offer, but… I’m married

Hey, why don’t you send a little message

from me back to your limp-dick boss?

Don’t touch that!

Moxxie, do not let her access any of your holes!

I…I gotta go lie down…now

Oh this won’t stand!

All right ****! That’s it!

If you’re gonna be shitty to my employees

then I challenge you to a fucking…challenge!

Fuck I said that twice

Is this imp boy starting a demon duel?

I think he is

What’s the game then, Blitzo?

Every year, you STD spreaders go up topside

for easy pickings while spring break is a prime time

for crime of all kinds

So I bet…you succu-bitches can’t fuck as many people

as we can off by the end of the day

Oh, you’re serious?

Game on, bitch

Alright, shut your assholes!

here’s how we’re going to do this shit

First, we find a fuck ton of clients

We portal up

We have our fun murder time as per usual

We pile all the bodies into a big fucking canoe

We push said canoe into some water

We light it on fire to attract the sharks and eagles

and maybe a goose, too. Fuck it

They come and eat the bodies. We win the bet

We rub it in that sloppy bitch’s drunken whore ass face

Do you have any questions?

Uh, yeah. Why was that nonsense?

That wasn’t a question

That wasn’t a plan

I’m sorry, but that was a flawless presentation

of what we should do, Moxx

It’s not my fault you’ve got a smooth little brain upstairs

A what now?

I’m calling you slow, Moxxie

God, why don’t you learn to take criticism

you talentless baby dick troll?

Well why don’t you take an art class?

Why don’t you see how expensive they are?!

Hey, is there a way I can come with you guys this time?

Absolutely not. I forbid it. Not gonna happen. Sorry, sweetie

Spring break is no place for young vulnerable goth girls

You know the kind of freaks up there who drool all over you

Well, I can blend in with humans easy enough

Just let me tag along

Wait, say that again

I can blend in?

Do you have a human disguise?

Yeah. Don’t you?

You three have been screwing around on Earth

this whole fucking time without human disguises?

Okay, new plan!

Loony can help lure the humans to us

and we’ll take care of the rest

Okay how about that?

Flawless logic

I think you’re missing the biggest issue, sir

Isn’t it crucial to have a client who demands

enough kills to win this bet?

We're not just going up to massacre

I got that covered, Moxx

Now, we wait

Sir, there is no way we are going to get enough clients

by the end of the day with one poorly spelled

bad grammar flyer!

Now, who’s first?

Now remember, we can’t be seen, alright?

Loose shots will likely cause a panic

so Loona can help with leading targets

to a better spot to off them

You got the list, Looney?

Got it

Oh Loony, look at you! You look downright awful!

I am so proud. Now fetch

That’s nine kills in the bag! I'd like to see that waily snatch orgasm that many -

All right spring breakers!

Y'all ready to get fucked up and make some bitching bad choices?!

Verosika!

° This is your final boarding call °

° All Aboard °

° Pack your bags °

° Sun's out °

° Take a Vacay babe °

° Take it straight to Bonetown °

° V-time, free time, baby relax °

° Self care, no hair, Brazilian wax °

° Hardtop succu-bus to the beach °

° Catch some rays while catching some D °

God dammit, that bitch started her godish mating call!

Now she’s gonna win all those sex maniacs

We gotta pick things up, guys

Is he on the list, Loonie?

Huh?

Yeah I think so

Good!

Whoa, what are you? A leprechaun?

Oh yeah, pretty cool, huh?

But you sure as shit ain’t gonna tell nobody

All right, next one, Loonie, come on

Loonie?

Where’s my baby?!

Look

° how does it smell? °

° Pack your bags °

° Sun's out °

° Take a Vacay babe °

° Take it straight to Bonetown °

Now who wants a piss of this?

Heeey, you!

Hey. You’re the hound working for my boss’s freaky ex

Yeah. Sorry if that’s weird

It’s cool. Her beef ain’t mine

I’m not paid enough to care

Yeah. Yeah. I’m Loona!

Okay. I’m Vortex!

That’s hot

I mean like literally you know because vortexes

you know, they give off heat. Probably

Right?

Uh, yeah. I guess

But my friends call me Tex

Oh yeah? I wish I had friends

I mean no, I mean, I don’t. I…I don’t have friends

Am I interrupting something?

Nah man. Just having a conversation

“Conversation” leads to HPV!

Aaand we've lost him

Huh, it’s looking like it’s up to us handle this list

Hell yeah!

Team M and M, getting shit down, making the money!

Blitzo get the fuck out of here

You’re gonna get us all into shit

I just wanted to see what was so important

that you’d be distracted from your job

What, I can’t have a break?

We have a parking spot on the line!

Hey dude. Why don’t you chill out?

Why don’t you stay out of it?

Okay, this is our business. Literally

Oh fuck Blitzo!

Why can’t you stay out of my face for like five minutes?!

Because I adopted you!

And that should mean something

Oh what does it matter?

You’re not my real dad! I was almost eighteen

It still counts

Well it shouldn’t

I didn’t need you then, asshole!

I don’t now

Party!

Ew!

Oh my god! It’s a fucking possum!

Oh crumbs!

Shut the possum in the can!

Possum beer, baby! Beer possum!

Uhh...Blitzo...

I'm...

Enjoy your break, Loonie

’m gonna go kill something

Uhh

Damn, girl. That was savage. You okay?

Yeah, I’m fine. He’ll get over it

He always does

I’m glad you could stick up for yourself, at least

Hmm. Takes guts

Thanks

Moxxie!

Millieee!

Hi!

Hey, and when did you get four heads?

I wanna kiss ‘em!

Fish

I love that woman

Oh she totally pegs you, doesn’t she?

Oh yeah! Way to show off, Mils!

Is Moxx okay?

Oh yeah he’s fine

This is funny

I'm sooooo... drinky

Okay, this is too wholesome for my liking

Blitzo

Oh perfect. That must be the whores!

That was handled rather… obvious, don’t you think?

I don’t think this belonged to any of us

Would be a shame if anyone found out you guys

were behind a giant monster fish

in the human world

Oh Satan! You gotta be so fucked!

Yeah, well you three nasty ass gremlins

will be in shit for not being in disguises

A human called me a possum

I am not a possum

You know, we could keep this little B movie scene

on the down low if you agree to let us use that parking space

Fine

We fucking won!

Fuck yes!

In your face, bitch!

Come on, let’s get out of here. Tex!

Well, guess it’s time to bounce

But hey, if you’re ever down to party

I’ll give you a ring sometime

Really? I mean, Yeah. Yeah

Yeah. My girlfriend throws a ton of crazy hound parties

Nice. Can’t wait for my first one

Let’s get you some friends, girl

Come on, Loonie toony!

Let’s go back and park our fat fucking car

in our fat fucking space!

Put your hands up, you sick deviants!

Alright, sluts, get ready to suck a lot of pig dick