Defeating the inner impostor that keeps us from being successful | Knatokie Ford | TEDxMidAtlantic

Dr. Knatokie Ford is a Senior Policy Advisor at the White House Office of Science and Technology Policy (OSTP), Obama Administration, where she oversees development of national initiatives to raise visibility and improve the image of science, technology, engineering, and mathematics (STEM) fields and careers.

Knatokie previously served as a AAAS Science & Technology Policy Fellow at OSTP from 2012-2014 with the President’s Council of Advisors on Science and Technology (PCAST) where she managed concurrent projects on education technology and improving the Nation’s health care system.

This talk was given at a TEDx event using the TED conference format but independently organized by a local community. Learn more at http://ted.com/tedx

How many of you loved math as a kid?

No? Okay.

Now, how many of you
were maybe in the other bucket,

and you probably didn't like math as much,

and you maybe felt like,
"Hey, maybe I'm not a 'math person.'"

Unfortunately, we have a culture
that makes it acceptable

to opt out of developing math skills,

but when it comes to literacy,

it's not okay to say,
"Hey, reading just wasn't my thing."

(Laughter)

This is a major problem,

because 80% of the fastest growing jobs
require math or science skills.

And of the five million unfilled jobs
in this country today,

more than half a million
are in Information Technology, or IT,

which is more than any other occupation.

We have a mismatch between the supply
and this growing demand

for people with skills in science,
technology, engineering, and math.

In fact, a 2012 report

by President Obama's
Science and Technology Advisory Council

said that we need to produce

one million additional STEM
college graduates by the year 2022.

That's one million on top
of the projected three million.

So, why does STEM have
this worker shortage?

I just gave it away.

It's actually because STEM
has a major diversity issue.

Women make up
roughly half of this country,

but are only 29% of STEM workers.

When it comes to race and ethnicity,

African-Americans and Hispanics

comprised around 26%
of the US population in 2013,

but were only about, or barely 11%
of the science and engineering workforce.

This diversity challenge is not just
a matter of us needing more workers,

we're actually missing out on ideas.

Research indicates that teams
that have diverse perspectives

are more creative and more innovative,

especially when it comes
to solving complex problems.

So, STEM's diversity challenge
is a complex one,

and there are a number of factors
that contribute to this.

I want to share a few of them with you

in the context of my own experience
as a woman in STEM.

Here I am... (Laughter)

I knew you guys
were going to laugh, it's okay!

I was female Steve Urkel, I get it.

(Laughter)

So, this is me in the fourth grade.

I, already at this age,
had a real love for science.

I was really curious about
the world that surrounded me,

the physiology of the human body,
how did the eyes work?

I also really loved math.

In fact, when I was in high school,

my geometry teacher would actually
let me teach class for her

if she was going to be gone for the day.

She trusted me more than a substitute!

And I loved it,
I took great delight in that.

So, I was very fortunate
because I had a wonderful support system

in the form of great teachers,

and I had two wonderful parents
who always instilled in me the belief

that if I was willing to work hard,
I could do anything that I put my mind to.

So, this gave me a great sense
of confidence as a child,

and this carried me on to pursue

a Bachelor's and a Master's degree
in chemistry at Clark Atlanta University.

And I had a wonderful experience
at Clark Atlanta.

And my academic sucess continued.

So, this prompted me to be ambitious
as I applied for graduate school.

I applied for a PhD program
in biological and biomedical sciences

at Harvard Medical School,

and to my pleasant surprise, I got in.

But this is where things changed for me.

The transition to Harvard was hard,

not just because I was going from
rigorous chemistry to hardocre biology,

but I was also transitioning
to this culture shock

of leaving a historically
black college in Atlanta,

to go to an Ivy League
institution in New England.

For the first time,
it was hard for me to look around

and see people that looked like me,
as teachers or students.

And so, I started to struggle
with my classes, they were hard.

And it wasn't long
before I started to feel like,

"Hey, maybe I'm not that smart after all.
Maybe Harvard made a mistake.

And what if somebody finds out
that I don't deserve to be here?"

So, there's a term for this,
and it's called "the impostor syndrome."

This impostor syndrome wreaked havoc
on that confidence that I once had,

as a child and as a young woman.

I became a different person.

I even changed the way I dressed.

I said, "Surely, I shouldn't
look like a girly girl" --

if I was into fashion or make-up --

"because who would
take me seriously as a scientist?"

And so, I began to retreat
into this self-imposed shell,

I would go to class
and I was so afraid to speak up,

many times, I was the only
African-American in my courses --

which included small group discussion --

and I was paralyzed with this fear
of saying something wrong.

What if I sounded silly?

And what if that might confirm

what I thought everyone else
around me already suspected,

that as a woman, and as a person of color,

I wasn't supposed to be good
at science anyway?

This is known as "stereotype threat."

So, this combination of stereotype threat

and its close cousin,
the impostor syndrome

catapulted me into a deep depression.

Deep depression, it was so hard
to go through this motion everyday

of pretending that I was okay
and that I felt confident.

And so, ultimately, I decided
that I couldn't continue this way,

I just could not go on.

So, after one semester, I left.

I left Harvard.

And I went to Hollywood.

(Laughter)

Now, this is not as much of a stretch
as you might think,

I had always been
into the performing arts as a child,

and so I decided, if I was going
to take a break from graduate school,

I was going to go as far away
from science as I could get.

And so, trying to become
an actor is hard, too.

And not the most lucrative
career move either.

So, I quickly discovered
that I was not willing

to starve to become an actor.

And so, I took a position
to help make ends meet

as a teacher in the Los Angeles
unified school district,

primarily getting positions
at this one middle school,

right in the heart of South Central L.A.

So, this was another turning point for me.

It was this experience,

working with these children
who were considered "underserved"

that made me realize something:

those feelings that I felt
in graduate school,

where I didn't feel smart anymore,
or that I was so insecure;

there are kids dealing with that
in the seventh grade.

I didn't experience it until grad school.

So, if those feelings could be
so significant for me, as an adult,

with a track record of success,

that these feelings could prompt me
to leave a place like Harvard,

how damaging could they be
to a seventh-grader?

This issue of stereotype threat

can literally impact
the students ability to achieve.

If you tell a group of girls,
before they take a math test,

that boys are better at math,
those girls will perform worse

than if you had not identified
this negative stereotype at all.

And the same is true
for African-Americans and Hispanics.

Students who express interest
in STEM in middle school,

are three times as likely
to graduate with a degree in STEM.

Middle school, unfortunately,
is also the age where girls and minorities

become more susceptible
to losing interest in STEM.

So, I decided that, after being gone
from Harvard for more than a year,

that I wanted to go back,
and I was going to finish that degree.

And not just because
I wanted to be a role model for kids,

but I wanted to also prove
to myself that I could do it,

and more importantly, I was hoping
that somebody, someday,

might see someone who looks like me
and be inspired to think,

"Hey! Maybe I can do it, too."

So, when I got back to Harvard,
it was even harder the second time!

(Laughter)

That impostor syndrome was waiting for me
right at the front door.

But my perspective
was a little different this time,

and I had an added incentive,
an additional motivation.

I was determined to not quit,
so I kept going.

And it was not until
I was about to graduate,

that I got a very simple
but practical piece of advice

that finally gave me a tool to help
address and combat this impostor syndrome.

A post-doc in my life
said to me, "Knatokie,

you have to get out of this habit
of comparing yourself to other people.

The only person that you should
compare yourself to is you.

If you can look at where you are today,

versus where you were
six months or a year ago,

and if you can see progress,
that's all that matters,

that's what success is."

And that was a real game changer for me.

So, my story is one of a person
who left STEM, and came back.

But far too often, that is not the case.

Students who begin college
interested in majoring in STEM,

of those, less than 40%
actually graduate with a STEM degree.

So, how are we going to get
this one million,

this additional one million that we need?

Women and minorities make up
around 70% of college students,

but only about 45%
of STEM college graduates.

We have to do a better job of drawing

from this largely untapped talent pool
of STEM potential workers,

especially in a context of a society
that's becoming increasingly diverse.

I'm very fortunate in that,

the work that I'm doing now
at the White House

is about bringing
all these pieces together,

about a love of science,
about this power of entertainment media,

and about this passion
to make a difference.

And that's exactly what we're doing;

we're working with
the entertainement comunity

to change the way that STEM
is portrayed in media.

Entertainment media is so powerful,
it can really cultivate and shape

the way that the public perceives

what is a STEM job,
and who should be doing STEM jobs.

But, unfortunately,

when it comes to portrayals
of STEM professionals in media,

men outpace women, five to one;

for computer scientists and engineers,
it's worse, fourteen to one!

So, entertainement media can play
this dichotomist role,

it can either normalise inequality

and reinforce these biaises
and stereotypes

that consistently discourage
girls and minorities,

or it can help us paint the picture
of this inclusive workforce

that we so desperately want
and need to achieve.

We put out a call to action,

and there are a number of amazing partners
who have really stepped up to the plate

in a major way.

The Cartoon Network launched
a 30 million dollar iniative

that's focused on STEM role models,

they're doing things
with their characters,

female characters that code now,

and they are also incorporating
hands-on activities for kids

that are at this intersection
of creativity and technology.

The Alliance for Family Entertainment
launched a new initiative

called "See Her," #SeeHer,

which is specifically focused
on the ways women and girls

are portrayed in both
adverstising and media.

How do the advertisers
leverage their power to help change this?

The role model piece is so important.

Role models inspire youth and adults

to envision themselves
as future STEM professionals.

Role models also help inspire confidence
in studying STEM subjects.

As the big boss said here,

it really is hard
to be what you cannot see.

So, we have made some progress --

(Laughter)

Go ahead, get it out!
Go ahead and laugh again, it's fine.

(Laughter)

So, we have made progress,
but we still have a ways to go.

And this is literally
this diversity challenge

that STEM has had for decades,
this is an 'all hands on deck' issue.

The good news is that
each and every one of us here

has the ability to make a difference.

How many of you are parents?

Quite a few of you.

If you're a parent --
you remember what I said earlier?

My parents were so critical

in this confidence
that I developed as a child.

So, if you are a parent, a teacher,
an aunt, an uncle, a mentor,

if you have young people
that are in your life,

you have the ability
to help inspire confidence in them;

to help them believe

that if they are willing to work hard,
they can do anything,

the sky is really the limit!

We all also have
to help our kids understand

that if something
is hard at first, or difficult,

it does not mean that they don't belong.

And we also have to help our kids

recognize that their uniqueness
is actually an asset, it's a good thing;

and the diversity of this country
is one of our greatest strengths,

especially when it comes
to solving complex problems.

Thank you.

(Applause)