Who Should Ireland Support in the Euros? | Foil Arms and Hog

You watching the Euros?

No

What? Why not?

Well Ireland aren't in it so I just...

Yeah so it's great you get a free pass

to support a far better team guilt free

Oh I never really thought about it like that

It's brilliant

Alright I'm in who are the favourites?

France I think

France alright I'll support them

What?

No no no you can't do that

Yeah that's cheating you can't

you have to support someone crap

Well I thought the whole point of this

was that we finally get to support a team

that is not crap

Yeah but we're Irish

So

So you can't support the favourites

You have to support an underdog

Yeah

But why?

Because Irish people

don't like winning unless it's against

all the odds

Yeah exactly because then when we

do win it's like the biggest thing ever

And then if we lose?

Well no one was expecting us

to win anyway

Okay I can get on board

What about North Macedonia then?

You've got to pick a team that's you know

has a chance at winning

otherwise there's no point

Okay so I have to pick someone

who is crap but not like

really crap?

Exactly

Okay what about like Scotland or Wales then?

There is a nice Celtic connection too

Yeah a little bit too similar to Ireland tho

It would be a constant reminder

of how crap we are.

Yeah the better they do the more

bad we are going to feel

Okay

Right yeah I'd just love a personal

connection with the team that I

picked though

Maybe somewhere you went on holidays?

I don't know.

Okay well I have been to like Spain

Portugal, Italy?

Yeah they are all too good

Sorry

I don't know anything about all these

other countries you know?

Well you know a lot about England

I mean you know their players from the premiere league

Yeah but they are one of the favourites

So I can't pick them

Yeah but there is that loop hole that

they are always going to bottle it

in the end so

Ah look no it doesn't matter my

family would disown me if I supported England

Why?

Oh the English shot my great grand father in 1916

Your grandfather fought in the rebellion?

Oh no Battle of the Somme

German infantry

My mother's maiden name is Ziegler

Oh

Well there's your family connection

Just support Germany

Well you see I can't do that either

My great grandfather on my father's side

fought for the British army

in the same battle

So awkward at gatherings

Right

Oh what about the Ukraine?

Oh yeah they are a great choice

Oh yeah

But you can't have them

I'm supporting them

Oh

You have family there or?

No no I kinda just like the jersey

You know what Croatia

Great jersey as well

But they verge on a little too

good to support

Okay right

Slovakia maybe?

Are you serious?

Slovakia are the reason we are not

in the Euros in the first place

Penalties remember?

Alight jeez then Netherlands?

Nooooo no no no

They kicked us out of the 1994 world cup

second round.

That's another thing about the Irish

We hold a grudge

Okay right so I have to pick someone who is crap

but not like totally crap

they haven't beat us in a major game

in the last 100 years

and they can't so similar to Ireland that

it kind of just reminds us of our own fallings

Yeah see easy. Yeah.

What about Finland?

Finland?

They are new to the tournament

They are the ultimate underdog

They are not completely crap

they actually have a chance

Wait a second wait are they the guys

with the salted liquorice

Yeah yeah

Absolutely not

I can still taste it from the last time

Right

Well what about Sweden?

Sweden?

No sorry

Irish people are not good looking enough

to support Sweden

What?

Well you know when the camera cuts to the crowd?

In a Swedish match and they are all

ridiculously good looking

yeah

That's not us

Okay

Well I don't know maybe I could just

follow the tournament as a neutral?

Ah support Switzerland?

Yeah

No no sorry

Their national anthem is just

too boring

Really?

Yeah yeah

It feels like you are in Church

No I couldn't take that every match

How is that supposed to get you going?

I don't know not that

What about Turkey?

Not after what happened my granny

What happened your granny?

She fell off an Ottoman

What about Austria?

I'm afreud not

Is this about your relationship with your mother?

I don't want to talk about it

What about Poland?

There is tonnes of Polish people here

If they win the place will be hopping

I mean it will be like we are in the Euros

Do you not remember when I drank

that Polish beer?

I was sick as a dog the next day

You had 18 cans

Did I?

Yeah

It's still a no

Well that only leaves you with Hungary, Russia or Denmark

Denmark

There is a great idea

They have a player called Delaney for God's sake

Delaney?

Yeah yeah

His great great grandfather

Emigrated from Ireland

to America

And then his grandfather came to Denmark

So...

So he's practically Irish

Yeah yeah

And what's more Irish than claiming someone as Irish

who isn't Irish

Oh perfect I will support them then

Brilliant

Go on the Danes

His Ma is from Copenhagen

His Dad is from Castleblayney

Oh...

Thomas Delaney

You think he's Danish but

he's Irish to me

Oh...

Tomás Delaney

Barry's for breakfast

And Guinness for tea

Oi Oi

Thomas Delaney

Doomdah

You can see the varying different degrees

in the face paint of what we have planned

for the night

Nothing

A little bit of something

I got plans

I'm not putting it on

I'm going to meet at least one person

That's so true

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Tomas Delaney