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I Watched Every Razzie Worst Picture Winner (ft. ​Nikki Carreon & YungJunko)

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    What's up cinephiles,
    I'm Evasive,
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    and this piece of paper right here
    means two things:
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    Number one, I am tens of
    thousands of
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    dollars in debt,
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    and number two, I know a lot
    about movies.
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    And since it looks like the U.S
    government
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    is not going to be giving me any
    debt relief this year,
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    I have no choice now but to
    torture myself on the Internet
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    for money to pay off the loans
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    I took out to go to film school.
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    (eEeEewWwWw!)
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    So for this video, I watched every
    movie that's ever won
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    a Razzie Award for Worst Picture
    of the Year.
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    This was an extremely painful
    experience
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    and I regretted my decision
    immediately,
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    but for the sake of my adoring
    fans
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    and my bank account,
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    I went ahead and watched all 46
    of these
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    movies so I could explain them to
    you.
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    But after the grueling experience
    of watching all these movies,
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    I'm not about to tackle this
    breakdown alone.
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    So I went ahead and roped in
    another video
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    essay girly and a talking trash can
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    to help explain some of these
    movies for me.
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    But before I get to the movies, let
    me explain what the Razzies are.
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    The Golden Raspberry Awards are
    an annual event,
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    usually held the night before the Oscars,
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    to give out awards for the worst
    movies of the year.
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    It was founded by Hollywood
    copywriter
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    John Wilson and editor Maureen
    Murphy.
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    The idea for the Razzies came
    about
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    in 1980 when Wilson saw
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    Can't Stop the Music and Xanadu
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    back to back and hated them both
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    so much he thought there ought
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    to be an award show for this type
    of thing.
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    Months later, Wilson hosted an
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    Oscars watch party at his house,
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    and after the Oscars had finished,
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    he and Murphy passed out ballots
    to everyone at the party to vote
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    on the worst movies of the year,
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    and then he announced the
    winners in his living room.
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    Over time, the ceremony grew and
    grew,
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    and today they're considered a
    staple
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    of the Hollywood award season
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    as a low-budget Bizarro World
    Oscars
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    that distributes awards in
    categories
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    such as Worst Actor, Worst
    Director,
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    and Worst Screenplay.
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    Unlike the qualifications for voting
    at the Oscars, though,
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    becoming a Razzie voter is very
    easy:
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    either be friends with one of the
    producers
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    or just pay a $40 membership fee.
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    That's all it takes.
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    So that's the story of the Razzies.
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    Now, are you ready to learn about
    every single movie
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    that won Worst Picture?
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    Because I wasn't.
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    There's 46 of these things, so I'm
    going to talk about each one
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    just a minute or two
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    and hand off a few to my guests
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    so I don't completely lose my mind here.
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    Also, I put a content warning on a
    bunch of these movies
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    because of the sensitive subject
    matter I discuss.
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    Not trying to traumatize anybody
    but myself in this video...
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    well, me and my guests.
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    But I commissioned them for this,
    so i-- it's fine.
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    Anybody who can swallow
    two snowballs and a ding-dong
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    shouldn't have any trouble with pride.
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    [Evasive] The first movie to win
    Worst Picture was "Can't Stop The Music".
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    A movie about the "origins"
    of the disco group "Village People".
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    I say origins in air-quotes because
    the Village People play themselves
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    and the plot is completely made-up
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    and not at all how
    the Village People actually formed
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    The movie itself is super campy
    and full of these crazy musical numbers
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    that are unironically kinda great.
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    It's just too bad that in between
    those musical numbers are these scenes
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    with really terrible acting
    that go on for way too long.
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    "Wait a minute! I am not taking one
    more step 'til I know where I'm going."
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    "Yeah, quit my job, and you
    got me walking the beat again!"
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    - "And I'm not even getting paid for it!"
    - "Hey, hold your horses."
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    "I told ya I had a surprise for ya."
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    "I hope so. I turned in my
    coin change with the toll booth."
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    [Evasive] By 1980 the disco fad was
    almost over and
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    people loved to hate on
    disco music at the time
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    so you can see why this
    ended up being such a huge bomb.
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    Also, shockingly, this movie marks the
    first film appearance of Caitlyn Jenner
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    and apparently the experience was so bad
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    she didn't appear in a movie again until
    "Jack & Jill 2011".
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    And, uh, well.
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    Mommie Dearest is a "biopic"
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    about the life of actress Joan Crawford's
    adopted daughter Christina.
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    Again, I say biopic in air-quotes
    because the movie was based on
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    Christina Crawford's controversial memoir
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    that other members of Joan Crawford's
    family disavowed when it came out.
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    I haven't done much research on the topic
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    so I'm in no position
    to question this story.
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    But I will say that after
    the movie was made
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    Christina said the film was grotesque
    and not true to her memoir.
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    Released just 4 years after
    Joan Crawford passed away,
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    this movie basically spits all over
    her fresh grave
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    and portrays her as a horrible mother
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    who frequently, physically and emotionally
    abused her daughter.
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    Whether or not this is actually true
    is still a matter of debate.
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    Regardless of the real-life circumstances
    behind the movie,
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    Faye Dunway's performance
    of Joan Crawford is iconic now.
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    People who have unfortunately
    experienced emotional abuse from a parent
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    found her performance
    scarily true to their own life experiences
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    but general audiences thought
    she was just being outrageously campy
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    and over the top the whole movie.
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    Because of its reputation, the movie
    became a queer cult classic over the years
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    especially in the drag community.
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    It was even featured in the most
    recent season of RuPaul's Drag Race.
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    "No wire hangers!"
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    ♫ No more wire hangers ♫
    ♫ Ah, ah! ♫
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    ♫ No, no, wire hangers ♫
    ♫ No, no, no, no ♫
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    [Evasive] Inchon is a movie about
    the battle of Incheon in the Korean War.
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    It was financed and produced
    by the Unification Church,
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    a movement that was and still is
    considered a dangerous cult
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    with a leader who called himself
    the second coming of Jesus Christ.
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    The film's producer was
    a very wealthy member of the church.
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    He said he was instructed by God
    to make the film.
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    So, unsurprisingly, no investors wanted
    any part of this.
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    All 46 million dollars of the budget was
    provided by the church and its followers.
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    The film itself doesn't have much
    to do with the Unification Church.
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    It's a straightforward war movie that's
    just boring and unremarkable.
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    It had some star power but only because
    the actors in it were paid a lot of money.
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    With Laurence Olivier even admitting
    before the movie was released
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    that he was only in it for the money.
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    It was such a flop that no one
    even bothered to release it on home media.
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    The only available version
    of the movie today
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    was from an old VHS rip from when it
    played on Unification Church TV channel.
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    The only thing worth seeing in this movie
    was Laurence Olivier's makeup job.
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    I mean he looks like the Joker.
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    This movie is just tasteless.
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    it's based on a novel by Harold Robbins
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    who was paid 600 000 dollars
    for the film rights
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    and apparently fell asleep
    in the screening room
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    and never actually watched the movie.
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    First of all, in the first 15 minutes,
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    young Ray Liotta,
    in his first ever movie role,
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    sexually assaults the main character
    with a garden hose.
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    After that the rest of the movie
    is just her being forced to have sex
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    with gross older men
    in order to get ahead in Hollywood.
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    And you see all of it.
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    It seems like it was trying to criticize
    sexism in Hollywood
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    but instead of handling it
    with any kind of nuance or respect,
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    the movie fully shows the sex scenes
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    and does the very thing
    it's trying to critique.
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    The final scene of the movie shows
    her winning an Oscar for Best Screenplay
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    and calling out the men
    who took advantage of her
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    in her acceptance speech.
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    Then she's booed off stage, and leaves,
    and the movie just ends there.
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    It's really uncomfortable to watch.
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    But somehow the next movie is even worse.
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    Ugh, god, ok.
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    Bolero is a movie by John Derek.
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    John Derek is—
    (groan)
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    John Derek was an old Hollywood actor
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    who appeared in supporting roles in
    several big movies in the 1940s and 50s.
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    In 1973 when Derek was 47 years old,
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    he traveled to Europe to direct
    a low-budget movie called
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    "Once upon a Love" starring
    a 16 year old girl named
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    "Mary Cathleen Collins".
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    During the production—
    (retching)
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    I'm sorry.
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    During the production,
    John Derek left his wife
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    and groomed Mary Collins
    into a sexual relationship,
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    With the two staying in Europe
    until she turned 18
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    so he could avoid
    statutory (censor beep) charges.
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    When they got married a few years later,
    she changed her name to Bo Derek
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    and proceeded to star in all of his movies
    until he died in 1998.
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    (retching)
    (vomit squelching)
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    I'm sorry.
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    So anyway, Bolero was a movie
    about a young woman fresh from college
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    who travels to Morocco in Spain
    to lose her virginity.
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    If that wasn't bad enough,
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    this movie features a full-frontal
    nudity scene with a 14 year old girl.
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    Not an actress playing a 14 year old girl.
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    An actual 14 year old girl.
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    (retching, vomit squelching)
    (coughing)
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    If you've never seen any
    Rambo movies before
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    the image you probably associate
    with the word "Rambo"
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    is the one where
    hypermasculine Sylvester Stallone
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    is firing a machine gun
    without a shirt on.
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    But see, that's actually from this movie,
    "Rambo First Blood: Part II",
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    which has very little to do
    with Part 1 at all.
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    The whole point of
    the first Rambo movie was that
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    Rambo was a Vietnam War veteran
    with severe PTSD
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    who snaps and kills a bunch of
    small-time cops who treat him like shit.
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    This sequel, on the other hand
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    throws that tragic anti-war character
    out the window
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    as the US government sends him
    back to Vietnam
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    to locate prisoners of war
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    and Rambo is weirdly ok with that.
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    It's like he immediately got over his PTSD
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    and just got straight to blowing stuff up,
    no problem.
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    This movie was
    a massive box office success
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    and made double of what
    the first movie made,
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    so naturally, Rambo III also ditched
    the anti-war angle
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    and sent Rambo to Afghanistan.
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    I dunno if someone thought
    the first movie was amazing,
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    it really sucks to see how quickly
    they ruined this character.
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    But, like, I get it.
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    The people who went to see
    these sequels in theaters
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    didn't watch it for the plot.
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    They watched to see
    Sylvester Stallone do this.
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    (bow twang)
    (explosion)
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    In the early 80s, Prince was a rising star.
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    And his stardom was cemented in 1984
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    with the massive hit that was Purple Rain.
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    After the success of Purple Rain,
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    Warner Brothers told Prince he was basically allowed to do anything he wanted for his next project,
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    greenlighting Under the Cherry Moon without even reading the script
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    the story is, Prince plays a guy in the French Rivier named Christopher
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    He and his friend Tricky try to scam a rich girl out of her inheritance
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    but they both end up falling in love with her.
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    Problem with the movie became apparent early on
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    when Prince hired someone with no experience to write the script.
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    Then 16 days into filming, the director quit.
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    And Prince took over even though he had no experience directing a movie before.
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    The end result was a movie that features what I can only describe as
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    Acting.
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    "Don't try anything funny.
    Not this time, Christopher."
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    "I want the money or I throw you both out onto the street."
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    (gasp)
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    "That's right, [inaudible]"
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    "Throw me onto the street?"
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    It's bizarre, it's one of those movies where the acting is so bad it loops around to being funny
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    which has given the movie a bit of a cult following over the years
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    that and the soundtrack is amazing
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    like with Purple Rain Prince released an album with the movie that went Platinum
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    and is today remembered as one of the most iconic movies of his career
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    After Under the Cherry Moon failed, Prince tried one more time to direct a feature-length movie
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    but that one got nominated for a bunch of Razzies too
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    and after that he gave up and never tried to direct a movie again.
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    Also this here marks the first ever tie in Razzies history with Under the Cherry Moon tieing with
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    (laughing)
    Howard the Duck.
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    (laughing)
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    Greetings, Evasive viewers, it is I, young Junko, expert in Bird Law
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    and I'm here to defend my client Howard T. Duck,
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    star of the Razzies' Worst Film of 1986, Howard The Duck
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    For nearly the last 40 years my client's reputation has been tarnished and slandered against
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    by quack punch, chicken shit critics for this tragic box office bomb.
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    "Central character, the Duck, the one that we're gonna be rooting for,
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    he's neither funny, or bit of funny."
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    But I'm here to clear the air.
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    Howard the Duck is not a movie, no, it's a documentary.
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    I know this because I was there.
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    We all were.
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    My entire clan witnessed my client crash land on Earth
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    to star in a motion picture that of which has been
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    it's still awful. It's bad. We're not winning this case, buddy.
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    "I wasn't trying anything. Honest!"
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    This is a strange movie to say the least.
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    Howard the Duck notoriously opens with 2 instances of
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    full frontal duck booba in the span of 30 seconds.
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    But the rest of the movie is this whiplash
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    between what's a squeaky clean full house type family movie
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    that no one older than the age of 3 years old would find funny
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    followed by things like Marty McFly's mom showing off her ass and
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    pulling off a condom for Howard's corkscrew.
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    "Howard…"
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    It's like anti-matter Shrek where they didn't know how to mix adult humor and the kids' [inaudible] properly yet
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    so [inaudible] becomes this overly long bland comedy
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    with hardly any intentional laughs
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    that just happens to throw in something totally obscene every now and then
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    - [Howard] Oh!
    - I just can't resist your
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    intense animal magnetism.
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    There's a lot of attempts at duck puns, most are just replacing a random phrase in a word with "duck"
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    "That's it. No more Mr. Nice Duck."
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    Even the director's name is Willard Hyuck.
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    That's a duck name. That's a name you give a duck.
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    The first half of the movie has Howard pointlessly meandering
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    there's no funny interactions or observations or memorable bits
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    it's just an aimless movie with the guy in the duck suit.
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    You have an entire portion of the movie
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    where Howard has a job as a towel boy in a sex club
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    it's fun for the whole family!
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    Yeah, Breeders, what the hell.
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    Bareback bestiality and pedophilia.
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    Oh yeah, we find Howard getting a [inaudible] as a result of a [inaudible] incident.
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    Which also [inadubile] a Palpatine somehow returning from the dead and possessing the body of that one actor that's in every 80s movie who'd later be arrested for being a sex pervert.
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    "Whaddya think you'd like to eat?"
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    "I no longer need human food."
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    I need little boy butts.
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    You have a movie where a talking duck fires a giant laser
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    at a hell portal to stop a horde of alien warlords
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    from taking over the Earth
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    and they still manage to make it a total snooze fest
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    They try to give Howard a bit of edge
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    but he still feels too kiddy and sanitized for what they're going for
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    And part of that is his design.
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    He looks like a cross of a Furby and Mac Culkin.
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    There are some things I did like,
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    like these alien overlords are pretty cool
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    their design and their stop motion is really well done
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    and the sequence where Howard gets shot into space
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    is pretty neat, pretty impressive to look at.
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    I like this sequence where Howard and [inaudible] get a [inaudible]
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    and start flying away from the cops
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    that was good.
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    Yeah, Tim Robins is in this
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    Imagine having what's considered one of the best movies of all time as part of your portfolio
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    and then on the other end of the spectrum having Howard the Duck,
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    now that's range
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    Genuinely I was taken aback because some of the shots in this movie
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    undeniably go hard.
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    I feel like there's a version of this movie that could've actualy been good with less work
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    like if they leaned into Howard being this cynical wise-cracking duck
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    that's down on his luck who gets thrust into Earth and finds this strange new realm
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    isn't so much different from his own
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    then it's all about the bills baby put it on my belt
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    [inaudible] taking that as an opportunity for a fresh start,
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    slowly climbing his way up the corporate ladder
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    until becoming a national celebrity that gets caught up in 80s consumerism and greed
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    then maybe having begrudgingly involved in some of the weird sci-fi stuff like the comics, i dunno
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    I'm not sure how to defend my client, give him the chair.
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    (Howard screams)
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    (Evasive laughing)
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    Alright, I may not be able to defend Howard,
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    but know this: from this day forth, I will ensure every client of mine
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    is proven innocent.
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    Now for my next client, I will be defending one Bill Cosby.
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    Bill Co-Bill Cosby.
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    I'm good. Your Honor? I would draw. We're done here. We're done.
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    It's Leonard, part 6.
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    Ask anyone who's seen this movie they'll tell you
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    that's when they first knew lil' Bill was a real piece of shit
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    When I heard there was a comedy movie
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    that just started on part 6
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    I thought, hey, maybe this movie could be bad in a good way, at the very least
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    Nope, it's just bad, it's boring, it's so boring.
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    If there's one thing Cosby was always a master at
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    it's making people very sleepy.
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    The whole thing was supposed to be a spoof on the spy genre,
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    sorta like Naked Gun, except they actually came out a year before that movie
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    They really just had the cameras rolling and had Bill Cosby do whatever he wanted
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    There's a bunch of weird sex shit
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    I mean the clues are all there,
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    in the movie his wife divorced him because he slept with a 19 year old
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    and his daughter is dating a much older man to further her career as an actress
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    so then Leonard has to see her flash her tits on stage
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    for no reason, none of these scenes add anything to the movie
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    I think Cosby just wanted to look at some young girl tits
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    The whole film has this lethargic and slow energy to it
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    Everything from the dialogue to the editing,
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    it's like watching a movie at 0.5 speed.
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    The movie opens with Leonard and an assassin having a little shootout in a kitchen
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    The joke being that what they're doing is actually helping to prep some of the food
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    Ok, could be funny but the pace of it all is so bizarrely off by a step
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    Every gag and bit is like this, like they took something that was
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    maybe a 3 out of 10 joke at best and spread it so thin that
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    you ask yourself was there even a joke at all to begin with?
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    The plot follows Leonard being the best agent in the world
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    who's long been retired after being pulled back for one last mission
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    after a buncha animals under mind control start killing people
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    Yet again a god-awful 80s comedy starts of with an animal looking at a porno mag
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    Here's two fucking nickels
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    The entire first half is him just stumbling around tryna get back with his ex wife
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    who pours soup on him—what is this gag?
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    Is this a fetish, Mr. Cosby? You think this was genuinely funny?
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    [mocking] We'll have him pour soup.
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    Cosby doesn't have a single funny line or hook to his character
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    you can tell he's put zero effort into any of this
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    It's like he said "Yeah I'll do the movie but I don't wanna look too stupid,
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    don't make me look too stupid."
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    Most of these so-called jokes are what the most boring uptight person in the world would think being silly is.
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    [mocking] Oh, look, wow he's being a ballerina, so girly.
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    Oh, wow, he's doing a silly fitness tape, how can he subject himself to that.
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    Oh, wee, it's like he thinks these things are so beneath him
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    that just him doing it would be funny.
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    What a piece of shit.
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    You know what really makes me mad, though?
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    It's completely unfair. Because everyone seems to be trying, but him.
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    There's a part where Leonard tries to free all the animals from captivity,
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    and I just wanna recognize this bird right here.
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    Who in this 5 second shot, bends the bars of his cage with his beak and breaks free
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    God bless this bird.
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    This bird put more effort than Bill Cosby in his own movie.
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    This bird did not deserve to be in one of the worst movies of all time.
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    None of these animals did.
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    This ostrich didn't deserve to be betrayed with a sex criminal grinding his pudding pop on its back.
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    If audiences in 1987 hated this, watching it now,
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    with all the humor naturally diluted even further to the passage of time
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    is like drinking a 40 year old can of new coke
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    and when Bill's the one handing you the drink
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    it's safe to say you probably shouldn't drink it
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    (gurgling)
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    Cocktail is a movie where young Tom Cruise plays a bartender in Manhattan
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    then he movies to Jamaica and falls in love with a girl
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    but then he loses her and moves back to New York to win her back
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    and that's pretty much it.
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    What you see is what you get with this one.
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    It's a really mediocre movie.
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    Not that good, but not that bad either.
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    Well except for this scene where Tom Cruise stands on a bar
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    and reads his shitty poetry.
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    This is pretty cringey.
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    "I see America drinking the fabulous cocktails I make."
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    "America's getting stinking on something I stir or shake."
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    (laughing)
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    "I make drinks so sweet and snazz-ay iced tea the kamikaze,
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    (hollering)
    the sex on the beach is Schnapps made from peach
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    the ball and hammer the Alabama slammer."
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    Unsurprisingly with Tom Cruise starring, this movie was a massive success,
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    earning a ridiculous 171 million dollars on a 20 million dollar budget.
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    It's also the movie the Beach Boys "Kokomo" song was written for.
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    Besides that, not much to talk about here.
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    I'm pretty sure it only won Worst Picture because this was the year Rain Man was favored to win Best Picture
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    and the voters probably thought it was funny to make both the Best and Worst Picture be Tom Cruise movies.
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    Ok before making this video, I haven't actually watched any Star Trek at all.
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    But because I'm committed to my craft, I went ahead and watched all 6 original movies
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    just so I can understand why this one is considered the worst.
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    After all that, I—yeah. I get it now.
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    It's not a horrible movie but especially compared to the previous ones in the series,
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    Star Trek V is pretty bad.
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    Pretty much everything went wrong behind the scenes.
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    William Shatner directed it with no prior directing experience
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    nobody could agree on anything during the writing process,
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    there was a writers' strike
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    then a Teamsters strike
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    They shot a lot of the movie in the Mojave Desert
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    which is just as miserable as it sounds.
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    And after the filming was done, they only had 3 months to make the special effects,
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    and all the best special effects technicians in Hollywood were busy making
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    Indiana Jones 3 and Ghostbusters II at the time.
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    Do I think this movie deserved Worst Picture?
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    No.
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    It does some wacky things like introduce Spock's long-lost brother that he never mentioned before
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    or show Kirk getting mauled by a cat woman.
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    But overall I really don't think it's that bad.
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    But to be honest, I'm not a Trekkie who had to see
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    Captain Kirk show up on the Enterprise in a "Go climb a rock t-shirt"
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    …So…I mean…is that bad?
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    I actually don't know.
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    Can someone in the comments tell me if that's bad, if that's out of character?
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    I actually don't know if I'm supposed to be mad at this or not.
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    The Adventures of Ford Fairlane was a "comedy" starring Andrew Dice Clay.
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    If you don't know who Andrew Dice Clay is, he was a comedian most active in the late 80s and early 90s
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    who was known as the Dice Man,
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    which was basically a cover for him to tell the most offensive jokes he possibly could.
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    "And they're always on parade."
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    "They march down the street with t-shirts and flags saying
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    'I want money for AIDS disease.' Beautiful.
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    I want money for a fucking car, I ain't marching up and down the street
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    Get a job, butt slammer."
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    [Evasive] The movie itself is about a detective, I guess,
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    I dunno, it's just not funny at all.
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    Honestly I was on my phone the whole time because I was just so bored.
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    - "I got something serious to discuss."
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    "Yeah, what is it, premature ejaculation?"
    (laughing)
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    "Like that time we were at our parents' wedding anniversary,
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    and I told that joke, 'What's the definition of vagina?
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    The box that peanuts come in!'" (laugh)
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    Gilbert Godfrey plays the only funny character in the movie
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    but he dies like 25 minutes in and the rest is just a boring mess to follow.
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    The director Renny Harlin was also working on Die Hard 2 at the time
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    which ended up in theaters at the exact same time as Ford Fairlane
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    and when you look at the money comparison between the two movies
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    yeah, it's pretty obvious which movie he cared about more.
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    "Clint Eastwood. I fucked him. Oh!"
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    [Evasive] 1990 was another tie
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    with Ford Fairlane tieing with another movie from unapologetic (censor beep) phile John Derek.
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    In this one, Bo Derek plays a woman married to a much older man
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    and when the older man dies, his ghost takes up residence in her head
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    and goads her into murdering another man
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    so he can possess his body and have sex with her again.
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    It's a supernatural dirty old man movie
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    where John Derek fantasizes about living rent-free in Bo Derek's head after he dies.
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    Plus this ended up being his last movie.
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    It would be poetic if it wasn't so disgusting.
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    "Bo was very very young. Linda was very young…
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    I guess I just meet them young,
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    before they're wise enough to know I'm not the guy."
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    Anyway the acting was bad, the story was bad,
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    the visuals are bad,
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    but the real cherry on top here was this movie
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    was the first film appearance of Donald Trump.
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    No joke, Trump's first movie was made by a (censor beep) phile.
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    He even does a little duck face in it, look at him.
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    Poetic.
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    Just watch this clip.
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    "Woah!"
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    "Happy (inaudible)"
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    "Oh no! How's my driving? 1800-I'm gonna-(censor beep)-die!"
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    [Evasive] Bruce Willis plays a master burglar fresh out of prison who
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    was blackmailed into stealing some art
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    but it turns out it's all part of a conspiracy to build a secret machine
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    invented by Leonardo Da Vinci that can turn lead into gold.
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    At this point in his career, Bruce Willis was mainly known for Die Hard I and II.
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    And was looking to branch out a bit with Hudson Hawk.
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    But apparently he couldn't decide what he wanted the movie to be.
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    In an interview, one of the writers later said:
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    I started to know we were in trouble when Joel and Bruce would say during filming
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    You know what this is? This is a Pink Panther movie.
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    The next day they'd say
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    You know what this is? This is an American James Bond movie.
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    Then it would be: You know what this is? This is North by Northwest.
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    I even remember someone saying:
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    You know what this is? This is Casino Royale.
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    Eventually I realized that if every day they were saying it was something different
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    by the time we got to the editing room, we were gonna be in trouble.
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    So yeah, the final product is all over the place,
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    but the movie has developed a bit of a cult following over the years
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    just because it's so…so silly
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    - (screaming)
    - Honey?
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    - Ball ball?
    - Woof!
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    (dog screaming)
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    [Evasive] Here's another movie that's really not that bad.
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    It's a World War II movie where Melanie Griffith is a half Jewish woman
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    with no spy experience who signs herself up to be a spy in Berlin
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    because she wants to prove herself and save her Jewish cousins who are in hiding.
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    Michael Douglas plays another spy
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    and pre-Schindler's List Liam Neeson plays a Nazi officer.
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    Most of the complaints about the movie were aimed at how unbelievable Melanie Griffith is at being a spy
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    because she was really bad at her job.
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    Like "spilling soup on Liam Neeson and taking the German kids she's nannying
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    to the building her cousins are hiding in" kind of bad
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    But overall it's not that awful of a movie
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    because the plot holes and writing problems are balanced out by a good soundtrack and good cinematography
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    It's just average.
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    Not bad enough to be memorable but not good enough that you'd ever wanna watch it again.
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    Basically the cinematic equivalent of eating at Denny's.
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    I think 1992 was just a slow year for bad movies in general.
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    That same year they also nominated Newsies for Worst Picture
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    and Danny DeVito for Worst Supporting Actor
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    like…what? Why? How?
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    What?
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    Once again, this is a movie that's not that bad.
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    It's a drama where Woody Harrelson and Demi Moore
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    play a financially struggling married couple in Vegas
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    and Robert Redford is a filthy rich guy
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    who offers the couple 1 million dollars for a 1 night stand with Demi Moore.
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    Honestly, it's fine.
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    It takes itself very seriously and it's vaguely misogynistic at points.
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    Also it's completely unbelievable that a man who looks like Robert Redford
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    would pay a million dollars to sleep with someone.
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    But in the context of the movie it all works.
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    Definitely not the worst movie of the year that's for sure.
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    I mean you're telling me that Indecent Proposal won Worst Picture but Mr. Nanny wasn't even nominated?
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    Razzie voters were asleep at the wheel this year.
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    In this one Bruce Willis plays a psychologist who can't see the color red
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    who gets wrapped up in a murder after his colleague
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    gets killed Assassin's Creed-style and he suspects it was someone in his therapy group.
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    I'm so confused why it was even nominated for Worst Picture because this wasn't even a bad movie at all.
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    It's surreal and weird sure but it's in a Twin Peaks style of way that still makes it unsettling and fun to watch.
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    Definitely a 6.5 out of 10 movie for me.
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    Maybe a 7 out of 10 I dunno.
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    This is another one that became a cult hit after it was released on home video.
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    Partly because of this crazy sex scene in a pool that everybody wanted to see
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    It was even streaming on Criterion Channel at one point
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    which basically means that it's certified art.
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    That's all I have to say.
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    I dunno guys, some of these 90s movies aren't even bad enough to complain about.
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    There's a lot to be said about Showgirls.
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    First of all, Director Paul Verhoeven was the first to accept his Razzie award in person.
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    And that's kind of funny.
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    And I'm very happy because it was much more fun than reading the reviews in September. Thank you.
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    (clapping, cheering)
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    Second of all, Showgirls isn't bad.
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    It's actually a great movie, in my opinion, and a lot of people agree.
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    It is a wild movie about high budget Las Vegas strip shows
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    And obviously with subject matter like that
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    you're going to view the movie very differently
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    depending on your gender and sexuality.
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    But regardless of what kind of person you are
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    the experience of watching this movie is an absolute rollercoaster
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    "One. Two. Three."
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    "Thrust it. Thrust it. Thrust it."
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    "Come on, thrust it."
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    But for as over the top as this movie is
    it's also pretty true to life.
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    During his research, writer Joe [Esterhazs] interviewed
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    over two hundred strippers in Las Vegas
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    and the result was a shockingly realistic depiction of the lives of high profile sex workers and performers
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    And a biting satire against show business in general.
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    Take a look at these tits.
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    What are these, watermelons?
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    This is a stage, babes, it's not a patch.
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    See ya.
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    Your ears are sticking out. They are.
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    Come back and see me when you get em fixed.
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    See ya.
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    Can you spell MGM backwards? I bet you can't.
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    - MGM.
    - I'm impressed.
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    Come back when you fuck some of those baby fat off.
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    Now in today's era of gritty HBO dramas, none of this is that shocking
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    but in 1995 this was next level stuff.
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    Plus with the subject matter, this movie has a lot of nudity.
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    It was rated NC-17 in America
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    and to date it is the only NC-17 movie that was given a wide release in theaters.
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    It was so explicit and controversial that MGM had to hire security at every movie theater in America
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    just to make sure nobody under the age of 18 snuck into the theater.
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    The movie lost millions of dollars and to this day, no studio has ever dared to try and release an NC-17 movie in theaters again.
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    If this sounds interesting to you, I actually really recommend giving this movie a watch
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    because I can't really do it justice with just words alone.
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    Just know what you're getting into before you turn it on
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    because this movie is every bit as traumatic as it is glamorous
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    And actually to prove to you how much I like this movie, watch this.
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    Oh.
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    Oh.
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    I'm a showgirl.
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    I'm a showgirl, baby.
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    I'm a showgirl.
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    In the mid-90s, Demi Moore was one of the biggest film stars in the world.
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    And the world was dying to know, what do Demi Moore's boobs look like?
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    That's actually the only reason this movie exists.
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    They paid Demi Moore 12.5 million dollars
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    the most any woman had ever been paid for a movie role at the time
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    just so she would star in this movie and show her boobs to the camera.
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    This movie is like if Showgirls was actually bad.
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    Demi Moore plays an FBI agent who loses her daughter in a custody battle
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    and then becomes a stripper in Florida at a place called Eager Beaver
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    to pay for a court appeal.
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    She basically girlbosses being a stripper.
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    Not in a nuanced way like Showgirls though.
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    But in a stupid way that it takes itself seriously
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    and is mostly boring and not believable at all.
  • Not Synced
    Despite the bad reviews, the movie ended up being such a huge success
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    and the director-writer-producer Andrew Bergman basically quit Hollywood after this movie
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    I'm pretty sure what happened is once he got Demi Moore to agree to go topless,
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    he basically just phoned it in for the rest of the movie
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    because clearly the audiences who were going to see this
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    weren't watching for the plot.
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    But what can I say?
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    That's showbiz, baby.
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    That's…that's showbiz, baby.
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    The Postman takes place in a distant future year of 2013
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    after much of humanity has been wiped out by a plague.
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    Kevin Costner, who also directed the movie,
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    stars as a traveling Shakespeare performer that's conscripted to Caesar's Legion
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    but he escapes and finds an old mail bag full of mail
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    and pretends to be a mailman so he can get food
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    and accidentally restarts the US postal service in the process
  • Not Synced
    Also it's almost 3 hours long.
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    Honestly, as most of post apocalyptic adventures go, this one isn't that bad.
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    It's about the same level of quality as Waterworld, actually.
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    But the fact that it was a 3 hour long Kevin Costner vanity project,
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    released just a week after Titanic,
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    made it a very easy target for critics.
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    What is Kevin Costner even up to, these days, anyway?
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    (typing) Kevin Costner.
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    I mean, hey. Good luck Kevin.
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    If you aren't familiar, the name Alan Smithee is a fake name the Director's Guild came up with in 1968
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    that directors who wanted to take their name of a movie were required to use instead.
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    And this movie caused such a headache that the Directors' Guild had to officially stop allowing the use of the Alan Smithee name in movies.
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    Ok so this movie was written by Joe Eszterhas and was directed by Arthur Hiller.
  • Not Synced
    It's a mockumentary about a guy whose name was actually Alan Smithee
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    that directs an action movie but he hates the finished product
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    so he steals the film reels and holds them ransom
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    because he wasn't allowed to take his name off it.
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    Now behind the scenes in real life,
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    Joe Eszterhas was in charge of cutting Burn Hollywood Burn
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    and when Arthur Hiller saw the final version
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    he hated it so much he had his name taken off the movie
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    But this of course created a confusion
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    because this was a movie about Alan Smithee
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    and the poster said it was directed by Alan Smithee
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    which you would assume was just a joke
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    but no, the director actually had his name taken off the movie.
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    It would take me so long to explain everything that's wrong with this movie
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    so let me just sum it up in four words.
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    Not funny.
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    Didn't laugh.
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    There's way too many characters,
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    the movie jumps all over the place
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    Harvey Weinstein is in it.
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    "Eew."
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    There's lots of not funny parts where the camera freeze frames
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    and there's a wall of text on screen.
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    I'm guessing what happened is they filmed all these scenes separately
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    and thought they were hilarious on set
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    but when they got to the editing room they realized they had nothing to work with
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    so Joe Eszterhas tried to salvage it by adding a bunch of text edit jokes
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    which actually made the movie worse.
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    I have no proof of this of course but it seems right to me.
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    I'd probably do the same thing in that situation.
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    Ok so this is a Western steampunk fusion movie
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    starring the Fresh Prince and the guy who plays Mr. Fischoeder in Bob's Burgers
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    as cowboy government agents who hunt down an evil ex-Confederate officer with no legs
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    who kidnaps President Ulysses S. Grant with a giant robot spider.
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    That's what this movie is.
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    (hooting)
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    This movie is ridiculous.
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    I don't know what the executives at Warner Bros. were snorting in the board room
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    when they decided to spend over a 170 million dollars
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    on a movie where cowboy Will Smith fights a huge mecha spider
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    but thank god they did because Will Smith turned down playing Neo in the Matrix to do this movie
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    And I'd like you to imagine what it would be like if Will Smith played Neo in the Matrix.
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    I probably would have messed the Matrix up.
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    I would've ruined it.
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    So I did y'all a favor.
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    This might not be a "good" movie
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    but oh my god it's so funny.
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    Plus the theme song is pretty fire.
  • Not Synced
    If I may quote one of the great gangster rappers, William Will Smith,
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    (nonchalantly) wicki wild wild, wicki wicki wild
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    wicki wild, wicki wicki wild wild wild west.
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    wicki wild, wicki wicki wild wild west.
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    Do you find those lyrics inspiring?
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    I mean, I…
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    Battlefield Earth is an action sci-fi movie based on a novel written by Ron Hubbard, the founder of Scientology
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    which he wrote in 1982 when he was in hiding to avoid going to prison for his numerous crimes.
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    It's about a distant future world where humanity has been enslaved by aliens called "psychlos"
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    which are a very obvious metaphor for L. Ron Hubbard's vitriolic hate for psychiatrists.
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    John Travolta, who plays the evil alien leader called Turl
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    and has been a scientologist since 1975
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    is directly responsible for this movie existing.
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    The production company who took it on was later found to have defrauded investors out of 31 million dollars
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    by overreporting production costs
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    causing a lawsuit that forced the company to go bankrupt and shut down in 2007.
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    On top of that, the movie was a massive financial flop
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    not just because the movie and its John Travolta action figures
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    were an obvious Scientology recruitment tactic
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    but because the movie itself was a visual nightmare.
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    The special effects are ugly,
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    the costumes are disgusting,
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    and the whole movie was filmed in these crooked angles
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    that changed multiple times a scene.
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    which gave a bunch of people motion sickness.
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    It's a really infamously bad movie that's been covered by a bunch of other YouTube channels over the years
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    so if you want more information on it, go watch one of those videos.
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    Just don't watch the movie itself.
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    It'll do nothing but make you nauseous and waste two hours of your time.
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    I'm serious, don't do it.
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    I'm sorry, you guys, conflict of interest, I can't talk about Freddy Got Fingered.
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    One of my friends and I watched this movie like four times during quarantine
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    and we kinda bonded over it.
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    And now this movie has a special place in my heart.
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    "Aw."
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    So I made Nikki watch it instead.
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    Because she's never seen it before.
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    And here she is now.
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    Where the hell do I even begin with this movie.
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    Part of me thinks this movie is some kind of deep anti-comedy
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    meant to satirize the other gross out comedies
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    that were popular in the early 2000s
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    and the other part of me thinks that maybe it means nothing at all.
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    I mean any normal human being
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    would read a title called
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    Freddy Got Fingered
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    and run away in the opposite direction.
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    Because what the fuck is that supposed to mean?
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    But to put it simply, this movie is about a 28 year old man
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    "Stop it, stop it, Mom, I'm a 28 year old man."
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    "Hey, baby, he's a 28 year old man."
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    His name is Gord and he moves to LA to be a cheese worker.
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    And also to pursue his dream of being a professional animator.
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    Seems pretty simple, right? Seems pretty cut and dry?
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    But that's where you'd be wrong.
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    Because so very many things happen in this movie
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    that are beyond human explanation.
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    Just to name a few,
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    Tom Green jerks off a horse
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    he swings a baby around by its umbilical cord
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    Tom Green walks around in a deer carcass
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    And he goes scuba diving in his own toilet.
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    - Get out of that toilet!
    - (bubbling, gurgling)
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    But at the risk of sounding clinically insane
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    and demented
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    there are moments in this movie that I find kind of relatable.
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    Like this scene where the CEO of an animation company tells Gord that he doesn't like his drawings.
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    - It sucks.
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    And so he immediately sticks a gun in his mouth and starts screaming.
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    - The characters are so lame, I'm a loser.
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    I wish I was dead.
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    - (screaming)
    - Wait, wait.
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    What makes this even funnier is that once he receives validation,
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    he takes the gun out of his mouth and acts like none of that ever happened at all.
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    - Sir I can't work on this all day, I got a job at the cheese sandwich factory.
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    If you're mentally ill, and make art, this is the film for you.
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    - It's time I grow up and get a job instead of acting like a little baby all the time.
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    I can't think of anything to draw because I'm so stupid.
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    I'm so stupid.
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    - And this movie surprised me in so many different ways
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    For one, it made me laugh way more than I anticipated.
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    - Can't you see we're both just a couple of stupid idiots.
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    - Gord…
    - (mocking) Gord! Gordie!
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    It was also weirdly based at times.
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    I say weirdly because the early 2000s was a derogatory fever dream.
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    It was like running thru the perfume department in SpongeBob
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    but the perfume was slurs.
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    42:25
Title:
I Watched Every Razzie Worst Picture Winner (ft. ​Nikki Carreon & YungJunko)
Description:

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Video Language:
English
Team:
Captions Requested
Duration:
01:23:02

English subtitles

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