What if you do your best to be mindful, but fail at it?

Thay answers questions on 21 June 2014. Question 7

(Bell)

(Bell)

Dear Thay, dear Sangha,

dear friends,

I have two questions.

I am a practitioner

and I go to meditation
to find some peace.

But I have not found it yet.

In my life I try to live in mindfulness.

I try to have hope in the practice.

I have a difficult life
and I try to stay calm.

But I am very affected by things
from inside and outside.

I feel I am too weak
to take care of myself.

It is the same with meditation.

I try to meditate...

I have experienced some times

that there is always something
inside of me or outside that...

I cannot concentrate on my breathing.

I feel I am not succeeding at it.

Some people say that
I am not ready to meditate.

And I would like have some advice.

My question is:

What happens during meditation

and what can I do
to progress in the practice?

(Sr. Pine) Dear Thay,
our friend tries her best

to practice mindfulness in daily life.

But she feels she is
strongly affected and pushed

by difficult situations.

She is not able to maintain her peace.

While practising sitting meditation

she tries her best but she is not
capable to concentrate on her breathing

because of everything that is happening
inside and outside her.

One person suggested that
she may not be ready

to practice meditation.

She would like Thay
to guide her on her practice.

For beginners there is
always that kind of feeling,

that you cannot practice well.

It is like playing tennis.

You have to spend a few weeks
in order to get used to the game.

The practice of meditation
is like that too.

But if you enjoy it,

you will learn very quickly.

You think that meditation is
something hard to do.

That is why you cannot enjoy.

You 'have to' meditate,
you 'have to' breathe in and out.

You have to sit still.

You think that
it is something not pleasant.

You have to force yourself to do it.

And in that way,
you cannot advance easily.

So the first thing is
to make it pleasant.

Whether it is walking,
or breathing or sitting

you have to learn
to make it pleasant.

When it is pleasant you can
be with it much more easily.

It can be nourishing and healing.

And you will miss it if
you don't have the chance to do it.

There are those of us
who need sitting,

need breathing and need walking.

We cannot be without these,

because they bring us
relaxation, peace and joy.

So the first thing is to try
to learn to meditate in such a way

that the practice can be
pleasant, nourishing and healing.

Not something you have to do.

The second thing is that

you have to be with a group
of practitioners, as you are a beginner.

The collective energy of a sangha
will help you to practice better.

You see that everyone is sitting
and enjoying breathing in and out.

Everyone is making steps
happily, joyfully.

Then you rely on the collective energy
of joy and mindfulness

in order to breathe and walk.

You need a sangha.

You should learn to practice with a sangha

to profit from the collective energy.

(Bell)

(Bell)