Hungama

The story of a bunch of misfits whose misconception about each others backgrounds end up in a series of chaotic, yet comic outcomes. Aftab Shivdasani (Nandu) and Rimi Sen (Anjali) play two strangers who have to pretend that are a married couple in order to get a place to live. Paresh Rawal (Radheysham Tiwari) plays a rich, yet ground to earth businessman whose business is named after his wife (Shoma Anand) Anjali. Akshaye Khanna (Jeetu) plays a young man starting a new business in electronic ware. Things get complicated when Rimi Sen goes to Paresh Rawal's house in search of a job & meets Akshaye Khanna who falls in love with her thinking she is Paresh Rawal's daughter. Paresh Rawal's wife thinks that he is having an affair with Rimi Sen & while Paresh Rawal thinks his wife is having an affair with Akshaye Khanna due to Rimi Sen and her having the same name. Then comes in Shakti Kapoor (Tejabhai alias Kachara Seth) whose daughter falls in love with a guy pretending to be Paresh Rawal's son and soon everything gets out of control

Fun and excitement...

all the fun and excitement

Fun and excitement...

all the fun and excitement

Is it love, or a battle? A colour you canít see...

I can figure out nothing, Lord!

Everyoneís all tied up, what predicament is this?

They walk together, and yet is there a tussle

Everyoneís all tied up, what predicament is this?

They walk together, and yet is there a tussle

To make them see reason...

is difficult to make them see reason

The actors that perform in this play...

they do perform a drama

Fun and excitement...

all the fun and excitement

Hurry! Itís time for school

Jungle! Rascal! Idiot! - Step on the brakes!

Youíre a girl, and you abuse me? - You want me to applaud you?

Why did you push me? - When did I? You ran into me

You deliberately rammed into me and now youíre talking back!

I know roadside loafers like you. You see a girl and get into the act!

Watch your tongue! You broke the button on my shirt...

and now youíre calling me a loafer? Where will I get a button from?

How about the dress which you spoilt? You know what the laundry bill comes to?

Canít you wash your own clothes? - Had I the time...

Iíd show you what else I can wash. - Go, get lost

Get going! - Go, go away

God! I didnít know youíd have such daring

You came away to Mumbai without telling anyone at home

What would you have done if I wasnít here?

It didnít occur to me at all. Had I stayed there another day...

my mother wouldíve got me married to the local landlordís son

So whatís wrong? You have to marry someone, donít you?

But that chapís a nut. Heís a real moron

My father had borrowed a lot of money from his father...

for my education and for my motherís treatment

My father died under the burden of the debt...

and heís now pestering my mother. He says, if you canít repay the debt...

have your daughter married to my son

He doesnít even want any dowry. - You mean your life is...

the sum total of the debt and the interest

So what do you want to do? - I must find a job at any cost

Iíve got to repay the debt and get rid of the landlord

Any job will do. - Easier said than done, Anjali

Iím living here with a friend whoís an air-hostess

Sheíll be here by 10:30 next Friday. Till then, you can stay here

But once she arrives, itíll be difficult for you to live here

Iím sorry, but you mustnít take that badly, Anjali

Iíve got enough money to see me through a couple of months

If only I could find a room till I find a job

Letís see what we can do. Iím getting late. I must leave

When love is one-sided... itís a punishment

When love is one-sided... itís a punishment

When love is requited, itís fun

Quiet! Weíre talking about life and death and youíre hollering away!

Come around, darling. - No

So it has to do with love! Iíll sing a romantic number...

the lady will immediately agree. - Iíve agreed. For a divorce

Iím not giving it to you! - Iíve got great number for divorce...

but itís a bit romantic and... - Sing it for your wife!

Now sing a song for losses!

Youíre more of a mosquito repellent! Youíve been driving the customers away

Iíll be a great singer some day, sir. That is my dream

Pipe-dream. Go away - Todayís the 4th., sir...

When did I say itís the 34th? - My salary?

I have it all worked out. 300 bucks. Let me have it

But we settled at 4000 rupees. - Sure, we did

You do get a salary of 4000. But who pays for your stay here?

Who pays for your food and your laundry?

It works out to 4300. Your salaryís 4000. So let me have 300 rupees

But this is a fraud, sir! - Really?

So go and find another job. Get lost!

Hey Bholu! Your milkís getting thinner and thinner every day

Are you pouring water in it?

I swear, Iíve never adulterated milk with water

But yes, I do adulterate water with milk

Buy it, if you can afford it. Or forget it

Hello, Nandu! How are you? Why donít you sing a song as usual?

Sing, my foot! Iíve heard the mosquitoes singing all night

Donít you have a mosquito net in the room?

Forget a mosquito net, it doesnít even have a roof and walls

I slept on the railway platform. - You must think of me at such times

I have a great place. Itís going cheap

But youíll need to pay me a commission for that

500 rupees. - I will. But where is it?

Iíll show you... do you have a wife? - Wife?!

You know Popat, the moneylender? He lets out his room very cheap

But only to married couples. - Why?

Because his wifeís an amazing dish. Heís terribly suspicious about her

Where will I find a wife? - Am I not here?

Youíre crazy! If I tell Popat that youíre my wife...

What rubbish! What Iím saying is that Iíll find you a wife

Iíll charge extra commission for that.

- Are you a milkman or a commission agent? - Iím an all rounder

You indeed are a fast guy

Whereís the other lady? - Sheís taking a bath

Quickly take the milk. Iíve got work to do

Youíre the one I was waiting for, Bholu. - What is the matter?

Thatís my friend, Anjali. Sheís looking for a room

Low rent. Will you find one? - There is a room. Very cheap

But only for married couples

Are you married? - No

She doesnít know anyone in town. But Bholu knows everyone

Bholu, Bholu the good boy... - Thatís enough

Will you give me a commission? - I will

All right, Iíll find a fake-husband for her then

So youíre thinking of leaving your house?

Strange games God plays. Here I am...

waiting to quit the dingy hole Iím living in and settling in a palace

And you! Youíre quitting a readymade palace

If you had a father like mine...

youíd have found my palace to be smaller than your dingy hole

But what is the problem? - Ever since Iíve finished college...

Iíve been begging for money to start a business

Whenever I talk about money, itís as if Iíve stepped on his tail!

This is the limit! - You have just one way, my friend

Change your father. - What?

Woo a rich girl, get married and become the heir to her fatherís riches

Youíre poking fun at me? - Iím not kidding

Iíve even scored with a girl. Teja, the garbage kingís daughter

Youíve heard of him, havenít you? Itís his only daughter. Madhuri

The garbage kingís daughter and you? Donít forget your status

Do you even have the money to buy her a box to collect the garbage?

I donít, but Radhesham Tiwaris son can buy even the garbage king...

not just a garbage can.

Tiwari? Owner of Anjali Industries?

Right. Anjali Foods, Anjali Chemicals, Anjali Pharmaceuticals...

and several other Anjalis under my fatherís belt

You told her that you are Radhesham Tiwaris son? - Yes.

Donít lose hope, my friend

The more thick-skinned you are in money matters, the better it is for you

Harass your father so much with your demands...

heíll give you something some day or the other

Dad, one last time. Are you giving me the money or arenít you?

Youíve been asking me for years and I didnít give you anything

Here you are. Start whatever business you want to with this

10 rupees! Youíre poking fun at me? - Hear that?

He thinks 10 rupees is too little! My grandfather ran the family with it

My father arrived in this city with just 10 rupees

And this is just what I got in my dowry

Ma, say something. Please. - What will I say, my son?

I asked him for a diamond necklace. He didnít give that to me either

He sold the land in the village yesterday. He got eight million

Let alone taking a look, I didnít even get to smell the money

Heís put it all in the safe. - Shout! Yell as much as you want to

Thereís eight million lying in the house...

and you refuse to give me 750,000?

I spend a lot of money...

in your education, boarding and maintenance

You arenít getting a penny more

Who will give me the money, if not you, Papa?

What will I do? - Rob and steal

But donít ask me for the money. - I canít take it anymore

If you donít give me the money, Iím leaving this house

Sure, go away. - Iím leaving!

Iíve made enquiries. Radhesham Tiwaris bungalow in Pali Hill is lying vacant

Thereís no one there except a care-taker

When the garbage king gets to know, heíll put you through a ringer!

Iíll marry Madhuri before he does that

Once the marriage has taken place, itíll all be over

Heís the brideís father. The only daughter

What will he do? Heíll have to accept me as his son-in-law

Are you out of your mind?

First tell me whatís to be done with my father, the villain

Did you ask him for the money? - Have I been talking in Hebrew?

Heís sitting on his money like a snake. He wonít give me a penny!

What did he have to say? - He asks me to rob and steal

Heíll fight my case for free. - Nice idea

So rob and steal. Best business. No capital required

What does he do for a living? - With a tanpura around his neck...

he goes around singing. - You mean heís a beggar!

Iíll have to live with a beggar? - No beggar, a large-hearted man

Here he comes

Sorry, Iím late

You? - You!

So you know each other? Thatís good. There wonít be any problem then

Iím not staying with this thug!

You think Iíll willingly move in with a witch?

You call me a witch? - No, you are a witchís mother...

a grandmother, everything. Youíre from a family of witches!

Priya, letís go. - Anjali...

donít act like a child. My roommate is arriving tomorrow

You must somehow find a place!

Adjust with him for now later, weíll find another place.

Hey boss... listen to me

In Bombay, you got to pay even to sleep on the pavements

And thatís so dangerous. If someone drives over, youíre dead and gone

Bholu, she agrees. - So does he

According to Popats condition, the two of you must look like a married couple

So hereís the bridal necklace. That will cost another 50 rupees

Here, put it on her

Hey! Iím not letting any Tom Dick or Harry put the necklace on me

Let me put it on you then

Sheís waiting for a prince to come along. Give it to her

One minute. Iíll put it on her

Popat-Seth, save my life!

Whatís the matter, Waghmare? - I caught a thief with 50,000 rupees

But Iím diabetic, you see. I went to take a leak...

and the thief escaped with the money. - How?

I have decided. Iím not going to trust a thief ever again

Thatís right. - You know what Inspector Rane says?

He says I took 50,000 from the thief and I helped him escape!

Rane has gone an filed a First Information Report against me!

Do you I think Iím that sort of a man?

This is the first time... Iím hearing of something like this.

If I donít keep 50,000 on Ranes table...

Iíll lose my job! - No, Iíll give you the money

But Iíll charge 10 per cent interest. - Why 10 per cent?

Iíll return all the money to you. I swear!

Iíll take all the money. But my interest will be 10 per cent

10 per cent? - Yes

And youíll have to pawn something too. - Sure, Iíve brought it

The papers of my room and the stamp papers

How often have I told you? Go inside!

You see a stranger around and you come running!

Look, theyíve arrived

Greetings. How are you? - Greetings.

When did you get married? - Very recently

And you said... - Itís quite some time, really

You donít eat non-veg food, do you? - No

You wonít leave each other and run away, will you?

Are you in a cattle market, sir? Why worry about such detail?

Let me make it clear. Sheís the wife, heís the husband

Give them the keys, and the commission to me. You get that?

Youíve brought the advance? - Sure, here it is

All right. You can stay here from today itself

Dulari, show them to their room

Murder of an elderly couple for money. Servant arrested

See this? When I asked you to do all the chores and not employ servants...

what did you say to me? That Iím a miser

But look at what you get when you employ servants!

Youíll sleep at home and wake up in hell!

Oh yes, nice heaven lím living with you in

Jeetu, my son! Youíve come back!

The way you left, I thought youíd never look back at this house again

Well? You went broke and missed the free food?

Have a couple of morsels if you wish. But youíre not getting a penny!

Daddy, Iím here to seek your blessings and sweeten your tongue

Iíve started a new business. - Really? What business?

Electronics, Mother. DVD players, CD players... itís a big showroom

It mustíve taken a lot of investment? - I invested 750,000...

and the bank financed me with the rest of the 6 million

750,000 rupees? Where did you get the money?

You are the one who showed me the right path, daddy

What path did I show you? - You asked me to rob and steal

So I did

I got to know that there was a lot of money in a house

I went there in the dead of the night. The husband and wife were fast asleep

I took the key from under the pillow, took the money from the safe...

and kept the keys back!

They mustíve called the cops by now!

They donít even know as yet. But now theyíll discover

But which house did you rob, son? - This one, Papa

itís the money you got from selling the land? Thatís the one I stole

So you robbed your father! Snake in the grass!

When I asked him for it, he didnít give it to me. He asked me to steal

Now how could a son disobey his father?

It was unaccounted money anyway. Let the cops arrive

Iíll tell them everything and the two of us will go to jail together

Tell me the truth. Is he really my son?

Iím convinced now! Heís truly your son!

My darling son... my good boy arenít you?

Return Papas money, my son! - Thatís not possible

Are you sure? - Sure

Get out of this house then! - Thatís what I came for

Lord! Protect my son!

Iím told that this house is to be sublet. Is it true?

Not true.

Who are you?

You walk into my house and ask me who I am?

There was this chap, Pandu... who used to dust and swab the floor

Isnít he there? - What work is it?

Itís in his own interests. Heíd have made an extra buck

But if heís not here, I must leave

Sir! Sir! Iím Pandu!

Canít you believe me? Here you are!

So this is the real movie! That was only a trailer?

Pandus mysterious ways, sir. Come on in, sir... welcome

This way, please...

As Lord Krishna says... how about a small drink?

No. - Iíll have one

Without any soda or water? - No

Nothing at all? - No

The boss has kept the liquor for guests

But the guests will come only when the boss is here

I didnít want the booze to get spoilt. I kept taking small drinks...

and pouring in small amounts of water.

And now, thereís just water in it!

Pandu, youíre a very smart man. - Not at all, sir

The moment I saw you, I knew I had met a thief in you

All I wanted to say to you was that I was as good as you are

You mentioned something about money

You live here all alone, donít you? - Yes...

the boss hasnít even looked at this place for years

Despite being such a rich man, he lives like a villager

The lawyers and the managers carry the accounts to him in the village

To pay me a salary, he has maintained such a big house in the city!

If you could get some cream apart from this salary...

what do you think about it? - Great idea

In that case, Radhesham Tiwaris son is living here from tomorrow

Me

Me!

First class!

Sheru, is your information accurate?

Absolutely certain, Garbage King... I mean, Teja-bhai

Whoís he? - Itís Radhesham Tiwaris son

Is it the Radhesham Tiwari of the multi-million Anjali Industries?

Yes. - He said, heíll marry you?

Tell me the truth. Else, Iíll kill you!

Heís been wanting to meet you

I swear it on the scales! Youíre really my little girl!

I knew youíd find a gem even in the garbage!

Hey! Get out! - This is my bed!

Your bed? I pay half the rent of this house!

Does the other half land from the skies?

All right. Letís draw lots with your name and mine

Whichever name the chit comes up with, gets the bed. Okay?

All right. Go ahead

One moment. Iíll pick it. - All right. As you wish you

Anjali! Now move... Go away

What are you staring for? Go away

Get up... what are you up to? - What?

Canít you sleep quietly? - When I lie on the floor...

the cold gets to my bones and I start snoring. Like this

itís more like an explosion! I need quiet when I sleep!

So go and sleep on the roof! I canít sleep quietly on the floor

All right, go and rot in the bed

I need peace, not a bed to sleep on! Go on!

Pandu...

The garbage!

Wash your eyes! - Itís the garbage king!

Remember what I told you? You wonít get a penny if you mess up.

Hurry up now!

Hello, sir, hello

Mr. Anil? - Heís on the phone

Donít keep calling me for 15 or 20 million

Take it from the drawer in my office

What happened about the car? The Ferrari? No way

itís become very common nowadays. Sachin has one too

I want a Rolls Royce. Three, in fact

One for me, one for my daddy...

and I want to donate one to my future father-in-law

Iím Teja-bhai. - Who?

The garbage... - Garbage! Sorry...

thereís no garbage here. Go away. - Iím Madhuris father

Father-in-law! Iím sorry, I did not recognize you

itís okay, youíll get to know me. My daughter has told me everything

What a gem my daughter has found! Youíll make a great couple!

So when do we have the marriage? - As early as possible...

But weíll have to tell your parents. Wonít we?

Thatís the problem

My parents want me to marry into a family of big industrialists

Theyíve even taken my birth chart. But Iíve told them in plain terms

If thereís anyone Iíll marry, itís Madhuri!

Thatís for sure. - So what are we to do?

Get married, at the earliest. Thatís it. - And how about your daddy?

Once weíre married, what will he be able to do about it?

Even if he does, my boss still has 500 million to his name

Till the marriage they all act funny. They accept everything later

In your shoes, this is just what Iíd have done, son

Thatís why Iíve taken the risk. Of getting married

So letís have the engagement tomorrow. You can exchange rings

Weíll find a nice day and have you married

But donít say a word to your Papa before all this happens

Come, letís sweeten our tongues. - Yes, letís go

Only after everything is over will they get to know the truth

Mr. Sahay from the city is here. - All right

Tell Ramdin to keep the calf away from the cow

It drinks up all the milk. - Very well, madam

Listen... - Lovely voice

You never said that to me earlier

Not you, my dear woman... Iím talking about Ustad Aamir Khan.

Will you shut him up now? There are guests waiting for you

How can you say such things about a luminary like him?

Iíve started businesses in your name all over the world...

and you wonít use your brains at all?

Do you have something in your brains? Or are you bankrupt already?

Enough of your songs. Chandrakant and Renuka are waiting for you

You ought to have told me! You just keep talking any nonsense

Anjali, you are simply taking the trouble

No trouble. Youíre more a friend than an AIDS virus

Not AIDS virus, Anjali. Sheís an advisor

Call her a legal advisor!

Itís the same thing - Is it really?

You canít tell a bear from a potato!

In there, I was talking about Aamir Khan. You must know about him?

Aamir Khan? Who hasnít heard of him?

- Iím a huge fan of his - See?

Now this is a well-informed man

As for her, the cattle, the fodder and the cow dung... thatís her world

It isnít her fault, actually. Itís your mistake

You didnít expose her to the city at all

How will she know about the world in the confines of the four walls?

Thatís not the case, sister-in-law. - Thatís how it is

Why did you send your son and daughter to London?

I was born in the city and I will stay here till I die

But itís different with the children.

Theyíve got to keep up with the world... move ahead in life, so...

I hope you donít have to...

go through what happened Anandilal Kitpitia did

What happened?

Like you, Anandilal Kitpitia sent his sons to London.

To study. The old couple lived in the village

The children went on to become very modern, hi-fi...

and the old couple were still raw villagers

When the children returned from abroad...

they couldnít adjust themselves to the local conditions

They were ashamed of their parents. Forget living together...

they werenít even willing to call them Mummy and Daddy

And one day the children screamed You bloody Indians and went away

The children never looked at their parents again

They kept yearning till they died. - God!

If my children treat me like that, itís going to kill me!

Iíve told him so often to move to the city...

to learn the way of life there. Letís go to the city, please

Even if itís only for a month. - All right, donít be stubborn

Anandilal Katpitia... - Iíll think about it

Give me the papers. - Here are all the reports

Iíll bring the case papers of Anjali Chemicals next week. - Okay.

We must leave now. - Very well

Do call me if you meet Aamir Khan. I want a photograph taken with him

But heís dead. - Howís that possible?

I saw Lagaan only recently. - Lagaan?

Iíve been... itís Ustad Aamir... have you ever heard him?

Letís go. We might miss the bus!

You are all alike! Lagaan! What Lagaan?

Saved! The ceremony is over! - What are you saying?

I say, itís nice

Ten days later is an auspicious date. Weíll have the wedding on that day

Iím the one whoís eating this paratha. So you neednít laugh

I donít need your permission to laugh!

Those who laugh belong in a loony bin!

And broken parathas belong in the garbage bin!

My parathas are neither burnt nor broken. Iíll eat all I want

Is someone there?

The man and wife have left the lights and fans on, to have a honeymoon!

How are you? Is everything all right?

Any problem?

What aroma is that? Whatís cooking? Potato-pancakes?

Yes

When we were just married, Dulari made some for me too

Her mother died the moment she ate one

Ever since, potato-pancakes have been a no-no in my house

My wife makes nice ones. Will you have some?

Would you like one? - No, youíll be left hungry

Oh no, have some! - I hope your wife doesnít mind?

Do you mind, lady? - Oh no, not at all

See? Bring it up. Quick!

Hurry up, darling! Weíre hungry

Whatís one going to do? One moment. Thereís more

Not burnt, not broken...

steaming hot pancakes! Here you are!

For you and your wife. - Some chutney?

Sure, there is

Take it all away. Weíll take the bowl later

Yogurt? - We donít have any

It's ok.

Even if itís in pieces and burnt, I can eat to my heartís content

Iíll fix you!

Here you are! And I went mad looking for you!

In the bank, in the bar... - Youíll have your money

Let the marriage take place first.

No marriage! Only destruction!

Are you already drunk in the day?

Iíve only drunk, but when he arrives tomorrow, Iíll be buried!

What rubbish! Whoís arriving?

Your father Radhesham Tiwari

Heís arriving with his wife! - What am I going to do?

Go underground. Quit the city. If possible, quit the world!

Right now, go away from here! - What are you telling me?

That old man canít do without cows, buffaloes, fodder and the works

Heíll stay in the city for a week, at the most

So disappear for a week! - Thatís an expensive proposition

Living in style, Iím already deep in debt

Pawn the ring garbage gave you and check into a cheap lodge

itís only for a week!

Isnít that right? Of course itís right!

What? Youíre going away to London? For a week?

Whatís the hurry?

For business? To make money? Of course, you must go ahead

Take care of yourself in the aircraft

Donít thrust your arm outside the window. Yes, Iíll tell Madhuri...

go ahead and make money. Bye

Master is here! - So this is our Pandu?

How have you been, Pandu? - Your blessings, sir

Greetings. - Welcome, sir

Whatís happening here? - This is our manager, Mr. KC Shukla

This is your first visit to our city, so this is a small welcome

You must be tired, sir. Weíll leave now

What for? I want to get to know all of you

Please come in, all of you

Where are you going, Pandu? Go and fetch the luggage

For a week or two... how much luggage must he be carrying?

Who told you? - So?

Sirís going to live here now. Forever

What happened? Fetch the luggage. - Nothing.

God, nice way youíve found of snatching my livelihood

The things he did so he could sleep on the bed!

He now sits quietly! But at least I can sleep in peace

Not a drop of water here

Let me tell you what I must today...

Let me tell you what I must today...

let your heart remain with me

let your heart remain with me

Let me tell you what I must today...

Let me tell you what I must today...

let my heart remain with me

let my heart remain with me

My eyes are glued to your face...

to your face, Iíve lost my heart

You are the one... who lives in my heart

Pining torments me...

I feel scared

Your sweet words might yet cast a spell on me

Let me bear the sweet pain of love...

Let me bear the sweet pain of love...

let your heart remain with me

let your heart remain with me

Let me tell you what I must today...

Let me tell you what I must today...

let my heart remain with you

let my heart remain with you

Lay off!

Iím being forced to live with you!

I know youíre not a decent man...

but I thought you had some manners. You have proved me wrong!

Donít even talk to me again!

Donít ever talk to me!

Stop it! Is that the beat? Or are you killing flies?

Donít do something you canít! - So why are you doing it?

Shut up! - I was following you with the beat

Donít follow me. Accompany me with the beat

Get it? If tune is the mother, the rhythm is the father

One who doesnít get it is good for nothing

The bell. - The doorís over there

Want me to send you packing? - I forgot!

Whom do you wish to see?

The mistress!

Who are you, sister? - Itís me!

Who are you, sister? - Radhesham Tiwaris...

Shut up! Who are you, sister? - Iím Mrs. Anjali Tiwari

Iím glad your name hasnít changed

Iíve made Anjali a member of the Wild Forest

The forest? - No, itís a club. A social club

Now that weíre here, we must learn the ways of this city

The women in this city arenít lizards on the walls

They do a lot of social work.

Whatís surprising is that...

everyone there knew Anjali beforehand. - Is it?

The moment we stepped in, everyone shook hands and said...

Thatís when I realized what a huge business empire weíre running

Whatís more? He too recognized me and shook hands with me!

Who was the unfortunate man?

Shah Rukh. - Hungry who?

Shah Rukh. The Khan. Film-star

All the film stars come there. - We must live in style now

No style for me. - Bring a bat into the house...

itíll still hang from a tree when it goes to sleep!

Pandu, you get no salary next month. - Itís a saying, sir!

The saying is, bathe as much as the crow wishes to, it canít become a swan!

Thatís true! - Iíll bathe and get ready

Weíve got to go to the dance class. - Dance class? At this age?

Youíll sprain your waist! Let it be

itís an English dance. Like this!

A new way of sweeping the floor? - See?

He starts a fight whenever I want to do something nice

Thatís the only difference between marriage and war

In a marriage, you get to sleep with the enemy

Anjali darling... mercy!

Whatís happening here? - The English dance

If you jump around at this age and something happens, Iíll have to pay up

Nothingís happening to me. - Iím talking about the tiles, not you

Quiet! High society women dance every day...

to keep their bodies fit. I suggest, you dance too

Me? - Yes. Donít we live in Mumbai?

We must learn to live in style. Look at your managers and officers

They live in such style. You are their employer...

and yet you go around half naked! Donít you feel ashamed?

I wear what clothes are necessary to cover my body

And look at your body! Itís sagging

Take a walk every morning. Buy a dog, to throw your weight around

You can take a walk with me then. - You just wonít take me seriously

Iíve wasted a lot of years in the village with cattle and fodder

I canít take all that now. Just watch what Anjali does now

I can see it all! Your obsession with western culture has begun...

I wonder where it will end!

Radhesham Tiwaris from your village, isnít he?

Who? - The owner of Anjali Industries?

Oh yes, heís from my village. - Iím told heís in the city nowadays

Go and meet him. Since you and he are from the same village...

out of sentiment, he might give you a job

Really? - Give it a try

You and his company share the same name

Maybe that will make him happy and heíll give you a job

The third time he has stopped singing!

This thing has stalled for the third time!

The old one was good enough. But you still bought a new system

Youíve changed too. So why not the CD-player?

If you find a new woman, will you throw me out?

Iíll do that, if the need arises. - Just you try

Iíll show you. Iím the mother of two children

And people still say I look like your daughter

Be thankful they donít think Iím your grandfather

Stop joking and bring a new woman! Itíll become like your CD player!

Itíll break down! - Whatís the number of this store?

Radhe-Shyam. - Praise the Lord

This is Radhesham Tiwari speaking

Youíve sold me a qawwali in the name of a Thumri?

In just a day, itís broken down. Colds, dysentery...

You must see a doctor, sir. This is the Videocon Gallery

Iím talking about the CD-player... the nuisance you sent to me

No sorry. Pick up this trash and get going immediately

And send me a new one immediately

No, no, sir. Iíll come and personally check it

Who you? - Anjali...

Anjali, yes... what work do you have?

I wish to meet Mr. Radhesham. - Well? Whatís the good news?

For a job. - We have a flourishing business

He doesnít need a job. - No...

Iím the one who wants a job. Take a look at my certificates

All right. The masterís very busy right now. Come later

Please... - I told you! Go!

I think I must wait a while

If I get to meet Mr. Radhesham, my work will be done

Must be his daughter

Know where the CD-player is?

Iím here to repair it

But Iím not a mechanic. I own a store, Iíve got to check it

Must be in there

What airs! Spoilt brat!

Hey, roving eyes... over here. - Jeetendra from Videocon

Over there

The bodyís lying here. Take it away in a bier

Take it away. - Iíll take a look. Two minutes

No need to take a look. I told you, itís dead

Two minutes, Iíll check. - No need to check. Donít touch that

It must be minor problem, sir. Let me at least check it!

Pick up the box and get going. At once!

Not to worry, sir. Iíll send a salesman and have it replaced

No, I want my money back!

I donít want any replacement. I want my money back!

He has left? One canít trust these city-guys at all!

Greetings. - Greetings. You?

I wanted to meet you. But madam told me that youíre very busy

Sheís a liar. Iím always free. What is it?

Iíve come here looking for a job. Here are my certificates

Wow! Youíve done M.A. And B.A.

Classical music too! Wow!

Havenít you done your SSC? - Of course, I have

I was only kidding

What sort of a job are you looking for? - Anything will do

All we need is a security guard

And thereís no need for an M.A. Or a B.A. For that, is there?

Letís clap

Girl, you havenít left? - I...

You keep out of this! - Sir...

He will talk any nonsense. You get going

Go away, I say! - What are you doing?

Is that the way you talk to guests?

Have you forgotten your manners? - I know my manners, mind you

The poor girl... - Poor girl?

So give her half your wealth! - Sure, I will!

I wonít ask you! - I know whatís on your mind!

But Iím the Pandey family too. I brought three cars full of gold

Return it to me with interest and do what you want to!

In any case, I fed your guests and took the vows to become your wife!

God! This wife sure is a curse!

She drove the poor girl away

Why did you take the trouble?

I told Mr. Radhesham to phone me... Iíd have the CD-player changed.

But Iíve come here for a job

You issued an ad, didnít you?

Sorry... I donít understand

I want this job

The job? What are you talking about?

I need it very badly

Whereís the need for Radhesham Tiwaris daughter to take up a job?

Looks like there is a misunderstanding...

I get it. I am an individual, I have an identity of my own. Right?

Thatís a nice thing. Iíve seen girls with that attitude of late

Even if their father is a millionaire, to prove your worth...

youíll work at pizza joints, cafes and other places

Iíll give you the job, if you wish. But what will I be able to pay you?

Whatís 5000 rupees for you? - 5000?

I know itís little. But this business...

Oh my God! I havenít even offered you a seat

Come to my office, please

If you speak the truth, youíll blow this last opportunity youíve got

I agree to work at 5000 rupees

Your name? - Anjali

Anjali! So daddy has named his business after his daughter

Jeetu. Call me Jeetu. - But...

Weíre going to be friends, okay?

Stop playing with water and get on with the work, Pandu

Look, our new puppy. - Wow!

Where are you going with the hippo? - No hippo, itís my doggie

And Iím asking the dog where itís going with the hippo?

Shut up! Because Iím your wife, you canít talk any nonsense!

Youíre always acting proud like a peacock

But donít forget. When the peacock loses its feathers, itís naked!

Letís go, puppy. - You can laugh all you want to

The things that happen in this house!

You? Here? - Hasnít Anil returned?

The lodge... heíll return after a week from London

You can come after a week. - Let me meet Mr. Tiwari then

Weíre going to be relatives soon. And we have to meet some day

Heís not in right now. - Where has he gone?

To the market. - He? To the market?

The temple! To offer namaz! - Namaz at the temple?

No... to chant the Lordís name. - All right. Iíll wait here

Thatís no good. After the prayer, heíll take a bath

Wonít be come home for a bath? - Yes... no!

Heíll bathe at the temple. He has sworn it, you see

Thereís a well at the temple. - He wonít drown in it, will he?

He will come home, right? - Yes, tomorrow!

Iíll come tomorrow then. - Sure?

Why are you crying? - Tears of happiness

Thereís going to be love between the two of you

Iíll come tomorrow

Didnít this garbage bin find another time to spring here?

Pandu, youíd rather vamoose. Or youíre going to be dead

Dead! - God

Someone from my village was here to inform me

Master, can you give me 5000 rupees? Iíll work and repay it

Of course. Iíll give you the money

Take a train and go to the village immediately

Or youíll land in trouble

Trouble will break out even after Iíve left for the village

Lord Ganesh, donít think Iím flattering You, but You can very well do it

That girl Anjali... make her fall for me

Sheís Tiwaris only daughter. If she falls for me, itíll be a huge lottery

An order from Hotel New Horizon. They want 50 sets of Videocon TV

itís 6 p.m. Let me drop you home

No... Iíll take a bus

Iíve got a car. Why must you take a bus?

Címon... donít think too much

What happened? - Nothing

How can I go away, until you go inside?

Why not? - I can see you then

A coke, please

Some chips, please

Come.

Mister, watch the movie ahead. Not here

Iím not an enemy...

Iím not an enemy...

why have you driven me crazy?

Why have you driven me crazy?

Iím a friend...

Iím a friend...

so whyíve you stolen my heart?

So whyíve you stolen my heart?

I was out one day, straying from the path...

when colorful roses of love blossomed

All distances were finished. We began to get closer

Such was our state, we began to breathe faster

Iím not among your assassins...

Iím not among your assassins...

so whyíve you thrust me among those that live?

Iím a friend...

Iím a friend...

so whyíve you stolen my heart?

So whyíve you stolen my heart?

Iíve lost my heart, although it all began as a joke

Iíve forgotten the world to lose myself in your love

I wonder how I will tell you about my love...

how will I profess my love to you?

I live in your heart...

I live in your heart...

so why have you given my heart a sweet pain?

So why have you given my heart a sweet pain?

Iím the beautiful moonlight everyone covets...

God alone knows who I was born for

My desire is a writing on the wall

So there will be victory and defeat in this game of love

I rock in your arms...

I rock in your arms...

yet, why do you accuse me?

Yet, why do you accuse me?

Iím not an enemy...

Iím a friend...

so whyíve you driven me crazy?

So whyíve you driven me crazy?

Whyíve you stolen my heart?

Whyíve you stolen my heart?

Canít you sit without clinging to the girl?

Canít you sit without clinging to her?

Is she your sister? - Sheís my wife!

So what are you going to do? What?

What wife, son? Your beard says it all. You werenít married ever

You baldie! Who the hell are you?

Who the hell are you to ask me? - Forget me. Who are you?

Who are you?

Whoever you guys are, Iíve bought a ticket to sleep in peace

Not to watch the movie! Go outside and fight!

Where will I get a rampuri?

I donít know Bhelpuri, paani-puri, you get there.

Iím talking about a knife!

Where will I get one? - Donít do anything rash, boss

Iíve decided. If I see him with Anjali again, Iím going to kill him

Either he lives, or I... - Master, master... heís her boss

She has only respect for him. Sheís not in love with him

How do you know? - I see them everyday in a restaurant

Which restaurant?

He escaped

But if he looks at you again, heís going to walk on his hands

He doesnít know what stuff Iím made of

Forget it. There you go again. - No, Anjali

I canít tolerate anyone teasing you. Iíll kill him!

Now look... Jeetu...

Why? What happened? - Letís go, please

What is it? - What is it?

Whatís biting you? - Whatís biting you?

Whatís biting you, tell me? - You tell me whatís biting you

How did you get here? - Walking. Whatís it to you?

Walking? Youíll run away now! Whyíve you standing between us?

Why? You own the place? - Yes, this is my fatherís pad. So?

Itís my grandfatherís pad, so? - You got the nerve, eh?

You got it? Want me to show? - All right, you show it

Try and touch me. - You try and touch me

Donít use my lines! - You donít use my lines

Go away... - Want me to show you?

Iíll show it to you. - Go on... get lost

Want me to show you? - Let me see!

Coward! You donít have the spine!

Paper-tigers. They wonít even touch each other

You donít know me. - Who are you?

Iíve seen so many like you! Go away!

Come here and talk to me! Pipsqueak

Iíve seen so many like you! Go away!

Here I am! What do you want to say? - What is it? What?

Iím not scared of you!

Oh God!

Iím going to catch them today!

God Almighty!

Whyíve you crying?

Whyíve you hollering away? Whatís wrong?

You ask me whatís happened? What a thick-skinned man! Disgusting!

Despite what you did, you proudly stand before me!

Arenít you ashamed?

Am I a virgin bride... to feel shy without reason?

Tell me clearly what has happened

So you want to hear it from my mouth?

Is someone else around? - Not the values Iíve imbibed...

to utter disgusting things! Iím from the Pandey family

Keep crying!

What were you doing with that girl in the shrubs?

Girl? What girl? I was looking for my cane.

Without your dhoti?

You look so innocent! Butter wouldnít melt in your mouth!

Tell me, who is that girl? I donít wear glasses like you!

Tell me. For how long has this game of hide n seek been going on?

You drive the girl away the moment you see me!

How can you even think of something so filthy?

You can very well do it! And I canít even think of it!

I have done nothing!

Even if I have... itís a great thing Iíve done!

You havenít bought me...

to expect me to watch the fun! - So go away! Right now!

All right, Iíll go away. But first return to me...

the 3 cars full of gold I brought in dowry, along with interest

Iíll go away after that... Till then...

I wonít let you have a ball! - Shut up!

Whatís up, master? Did the girl say something nasty to you?

One thing is clear, Bholu. Sheís in love with her boss

Not someone crazy like me

Iím glad my craziness has been of help

How else could I have made the world see reason?

Youíre getting disheartened for no rhyme or reason

Sheís in love with you, but she wonít tell you

She wants to make you feel jealous. - What sort of love is that?

This game of love, you know

About swimming across oceans of fire and all that crap

Take my advice. Fall in love with another girl

Want me to knock your teeth out? - Donít jump the gun

Pretend to love someone else. Like youíre burning in envy...

she too will burn, if she really loves you

Sheíll come running to you. Take it from me in writing

Iíve had it!

Jeetu, my motherís here

If she sees me here, all hell will break loose

I said I was going to a computer class. - Why?

Because I havenít told my parents Iíve taken up a job here

If she sees me... - I get it, I get it

Stay here, Iíll handle her

Hello... welcome!

Wow! You look beautiful!

New sari! New pair of shoes!

What can I do for you? - Give me some music cassettes

Music I can dance to. - Sure, what do you want?

No, I want only Western music! A childhood habit, you see

Know what? Iíll make a nice collection and send it to your house

I hope you know my address? - Who doesnít?

Remember to send it across. Please donít forget

Has she left? - Has she?

Phew! Saved!

Jeetu, I got to leave early today. - Why?

Tomorrowís my birthday

Arenít you inviting your boss to the party?

No, thereís no party. Actually, Iíve got to out shopping

Letís go. Iíll accompany you. - No, Iím expecting a friend

You donít want to invite me to your birthday party...

but Iím going to give you a surprise surely

Priya, Priya, Priya...

My dear!

I went crazy about you, the moment I saw you

I know, there are obstacles in our path

But rivers and streams do flow down the mountains

Like we have to unite some day

You mean the life to me. I love you more than my life

You are dearest to my heart

If sheís jealous, sheís in! If sheís in, Iíve scored!

Did you write this? - Yes, but...

Devil!

You? - Iím here to wish the birthday girl

Fat roses! Who told you todayís the birthday?

You are a very special customer. And we maintain records

But thereís a mistake in your records. - Really?

The birthdayís tomorrow. Not today

But I was told itís today. - Who told you?

Thatís what I heard. - All right, all right

Do come again tomorrow, like youíve come today

You must. The first flowers have been given by you, you see?

Thatís all right

He has brought roses?

And a letter?

My dear Anjali. These roses are a token of my love

Roses arrive today, to be followed by the bee

Iím the one heís going to sting first

How was it?

What?

My bouquet, of course. - Bouquet?

I gave it in your mummyís hands. Didnít she give it to you?

I see, that one? It was very nice

Did you read the note I left in the bouquet?

The note? Yes, I did

What did it say? - Well...

donít you know? - No, I mean...

did you like it? - Yes, of course. Very much

So you donít mind any word Iíve written, do you?

Mind? Why would I mind?

So why did you lie to me? - Lie?

That yesterday was your birthday? - Actually, Jeetu...

You didnít want to invite me to the party

Thatís not true. There was no party at all

I know, because the partyís tomorrow and so is your birthday

Your mummy has invited me

So youíre coming tomorrow? - I wonít, if you donít want me to

You must! Why mustnít you? At what time did she say?

At 7, she said. - I see

Know what? Come at 9. - Why?

The time has changed a bit

Iíll be there at 9. - All right

If Jeetu had arrived before the cake was cut, Iíd have been exposed

Whyíve you standing outside? - Actually...

Iím waiting for some friends of mine. They donít have the proper address

Know what? Go in there and enjoy the party

Iíll join you as soon as my friends arrive

Of course! Iíll join you in a few minutes

Heís the same boy!

Dad! Iíve had it!

Heís hiding from me! So I was right

This boyís having an affair with Anjali, Iím sure

Youíve got your peace...

all Iíve got is my craziness

Youíve come to your senses...

and Iím still in a daze

But youíre the one my heart still loves

Youíve got your peace...

all Iíve got is my craziness

Youíve come to your senses...

and Iím still in a daze

But youíre the one my heart still loves

Youíve got your peace...

all Iíve got is my craziness

How am I going to placate it?

My heart is crazy, it wonít relent

How will I tell my heart?

It does not know what love is all about

Iím obsessed with you... and you donít even realize it

You got all the hospitality, I was treated with indifference

Youíve got back to your senses, lím still in a daze

Youíre the one my heart loves

Youíve got your peace...

all Iíve got is my craziness

Hereís someone who could die for her love...

and thereís someone whoís unfaithful in love

What pain these distances give... only in separation will we know

Ever since I have seen you, Iíve gone crazy

Youíve got your sleep...

I got only helplessness

Youíve come to your senses...

and Iím still in a daze

But youíre the one my heart still loves

Youíve got your peace... all Iíve got is my craziness

Youíve come to your senses... and Iím still in a daze

You dare call that boy to the party?

You invited that witch too. - Which one?

The one your eyes were glued to at the party!

Wow! Thatís a wolf in sheepís clothing!

I can understand it from the way your feet were moving and...

the way your anklets were chiming. Now that youíre exposed...

you accuse me and find the excuse of having fun with that young boy?

The pot calling the kettle black!

Speak! Who is that girl?

I caught you in the shrubs, so you cast mud at me...

and try to save yourself? Listen carefully!

Iím not letting your scheme work! Iíve had enough of your farce!

You take me for a fool? You think Iím an idiot?

Just let me tell you! I know how it is!

Itís not going to work for long! - All right

Give me the gold I brought with interest. Iíll go back!

Go back! How about the expensive saris Iíve given your horrible body?

Whoís paying for the goodies you helped yourself to over the years?

I cooked for you all day and night! My work pays for it all!

You paint the town red with strangers and talk back at me!

The scores are leveled! If you can do it, so can I!

Will you do it? Will you? - Yes, I will too!

So will I! - Go ahead and do it!

Whoís stopping you? Just stop interfering in my affairs!

You mustnít interfere either! - I wonít!

Hello. - Hello

Iím Teja-bhai. - Please come in

I havenít recognized you. - Iím your sonís father-in-law

I donít get it.

I wonít beat around the bush... and confuse you.

Iíll come the point

Donít let your B.P. Get out of hand when you listen to it

Thatís what I say. Come straight to the point

My daughter has decided to marry your son

What?

Hello

One moment. Your daughter has decided to marry my son

Right? - Right

So what can I do? Tell your daughter to change her mind

No, you donít understand

The two of them have got together and taken this decision

Theyíve got engaged. Theyíve even exchanged rings

What is he talking about? - It canít be our son

Because our son is not here. - I know

Your son is in London. - Right

But your son was here. - When did he go back?

After the engagement, he went away. On business

Iíve sent my son to London for further studies. Not business

Now look, mister. Whatís happened is in the past

Letís peacefully and amicably sort it out

It canít be sorted out, Teja-bhai.

My son will marry the girl I want him to

You mean, whatever has happened... - What has happened?

Theyíve just exchanged rings, right? They havenít got married yet

Heíll throw the ring away. End of the story

How will he take off the ring?

My daughter isnít an empty bottle whose label he can change at will

Donít talk too much! From the look of you...

I can tell how your daughter must be. - Does she also sport a moustache?

Radhesham Tiwari! If youíre a big man, I donít care!

You donít know Teja! I come from a family of killers

There wasnít a day when my fatherís knife did not taste blood!

His father was a butcher? - You are insulting me!

Youíre still here? Shameless man, go away. - Líll go away!

But I will surely come back!

Listen... - What?

Iím talking to her, not you

I suggest we call our son down here. - Yes, call him here

And see whether he obeys to you or me. - Wonít you go away?

Lím leaving. Donít yell as if youíre fighting the elections!

Could there be some truth in the rubbish he just spoke?

Not at all. Heís just a fool

Do you really think so? - No

Know what? Weíll telephone him and call him over

Wait!

Iíve got to know the truth. - What?

That Anjali and you are not man and wife

Meaning? - Iíve heard the bickering...

that goes on between the two of you.

How would you know how happy I am to learn the truth?

We do keep fighting... but we are really man and wife.

I know everything. Look at this

Miss Anjali Does anyone address a married woman as Miss?

Ever since you wrote that letter to me, I understood...

you would really marry me. You will free me from Popats cage!

Marry you?

What if Popat gets to know? - To hell with the old fossil!

Anjalis coming

Youíre the one I was waiting for. Thereís a letter for you

I thought Iíd give it to you. - Okay, I get it

So this is the extent he has gone to! But why must I care?

Mother has written to me from the village

The landlordís son will arrive. Heíll marry me and take me away

Weíll live in marital bliss

My dear Anjali, Iím sending Raja to you by tomorrowís train

Youíll get to know each other better, if he stays with you for a few days

Heís the one youíre going to marry anyway

Donít forget, weíre alive today because his family has helped us

You will never disobey your mother. You will agree to the wedding

Iím sending you a photograph of Raja. Heís no longer like he was...

he has changed a lot. He has shaved his beard, he now looks like a prince

Youíll be stunned

My prince will come to marry me and Iíll dance in joy

Another villain?

Who the hell is he? - Whoever

Heíll marry Anjali and even drive me out of the house

I have an idea. - What?

Letís scare him and force him to return

How?

Heís the one.

- So go and scare him! - No, not here.

Itís a crowded place

Once I scare him, he wonít step in Mumbai again. Come on

Whatís he up to? Has he gone mad?

Heís cleaning something. The shoe or the pole, I canít say

Heís stuck to it! - He must be electrocuted!

Go and save him! - Are you crazy? Youíll die too

Find a stick. One blow, and heíll be separated

Is that why they tried to kill me?

Yes. I brought you here, because I liked you

Anjali isnít as innocent as you think

Sheís having a terrific scene with someone

Who? - The one who...

Heís a very dangerous man. Have you heard of Chhota Chetan?

I saw the movie. In 3-D. - Not that

Heís from the underworld. Even the cops are terrified of him

He has committed 40 murders, but he still hasnít been caught

He uses a new knife for every killing. I saw him with a new one yesterday

Maybe itís meant for you. - So why did Anjalis Ma send me here?

They plan to bring you to the city to bump you off

Even if Anjali marries Chhota Chetan after your death...

her family has nothing to lose. - No, that canít be true

Whether you believe it or not, your body will believe me

Is Raja here? - Go to sleep Raja!

Is there anyone here answering to the name Raja?

Iím going to finish him! Heís hiding somewhere around

My men have just broken a few of his limbs

Heís my 50th victim. Iím having a grand party after killing him

Iíll finish him if he comes here. Tell him I was here

Did you see? - How would I? You covered my face!

Why did you lie? You say he has committed 40 murders, he says 50!

Whatever! He has committed the murders, not me

Now get the hell out of here. - How far is the railway station?

Iíve got catch a train back home. - No point in venturing out

Thereís a strike in the railways. Canít say when itíll end

So what am I to do? - Hide somewhere here

Chhota Chetan and his men will look for you all over Mumbai

So hide under an assumed name. - But where will I hide?

Find a cheap lodge near the railway station. Hole up in one of them

Catch the first train out as soon as the strike is over

Else, Iíll have to mail your body to your village

Believe me, or go to hell

Welcome! Welcome, Teja-bhai

Hey sonny... come here. Let me show you something

This is my son. - This?

Recognize him? - No

No? And he says heís your father-in-law!

Ask him!

Have I married your daughter? - No

Have I promised to marry her? - No

Tell me something... are you weak in the head?

No. - So why did you kick up a fuss...

that he had promised to marry her? Why did you create a scene?

Is he your son?

Any doubts? - No

I have no doubt that heís my son

Heís not the one I spoke about. Itís your other son

Whatís all that about? Which other son?

Your elder son! - Look at him

I have another son and I donít even know about it!

You have a brother too! - You are a big man...

who runs a big business empire. You must have forgotten

But your other son lives right here. Everyone knows that

My God! What am I hearing?

You have another son outside my knowledge?

This man is lying! - Heís your son, all right

Though heís a bit dark of skin

When I saw her, I was a bit doubtful

But anyone who looks at you will say heís your son

The same eyes, the same nose, The same lips...

This is rubbish!

Donít scream!

Call your servant, Pandu. He knows everything

He was witness to everything. Where is Pandu?

Heís gone to the village, his father has died

Died, or did you have him killed?

You send him away when youíre about to be exposed?

I understand it all! Itís your ploy to stall the marriage!

Enough! Make anymore noise and Iíll sue you for defamation!

Shut up! You arenít Tiwari, youíre a disease!

Iíve cured diseases like you! I visit the courts every day

Donít forget, I come from a family of killers

Are you threatening me? Are you? - Yes, Iím threatening you!

So go and do what you can! - Youíll know it very soon!

In a weekís time, if you donít let the marriage take place... youíll know!

My God! Iím doomed!

Mom! What are you doing?

Am I supposed to stay here or go back to London?

My son, at what time is your flight? - At eleven tonight, Mom

Go away! If you stay here...

youíre going to get spoilt in your fatherís shadow!

Dad, Iím leaving. Iíll confirm my ticket at the airport

All right. God bless you

Letís get out of here. Thereís no meaning in staying here

Letís pack our bags and get going! - Only after coming here...

Iíve got to see your true colors! - What rubbish are you talking?

You donít believe me and you believe a stranger?

I wouldnít have believed it earlier

But thereís no way I cannot believe it now

You are a flirt! Before our marriage, you have been a womanizer!

Líll go back only when I have all the proof!

Iíll shave my moustache if you leave this city!

Your heart wonít relent unless you see him!

That bloody Videocon! - My virtuous husband, arenít you?

You keep listening to classical music all day...

and this is what you do by night? You are Satan himself!

Wow! You accuse me? Iíve seen your programmes already!

A good thing, isnít it? Keep watching it... and kill me!

God!

She wonít die like that... go to her help!

Manager, do you have a room?

Whatever it is, I shouldnít have to leave the room

And I want an attached toilet

Name? Raja...

Tulsidas Khan

What name is Tulsidas Khan? - Shut up, scoundrel

Your fatherís name? - Javed Chaurasia

Your motherís name? - Mumtaz Bedi

Are you the India-Pakistan border? Were you born to cross parents?

Shut up, or Iíll slap you! - Is your old man dead?

Of course, Iíll pay you

And give me the keys, quick. I badly want to pee

And donít tell anyone that Iím staying here

Pay for the cups you broke. - Get lost

Pay for the two cups you broke. - I wonít! Get lost!

Give that to me

My umbrella!

Iíll carry it for you. - Not necessary

The name is Babu Bisleri. - I donít want to bathe!

I canít trust anyone. Everyone appears to be Chhota Chetans man

Theyíre out to kill me! Anjali, why did you do this to me?

Why?

Priya, what am I going to do about Jeetu

If I tell him the truth, Iíll lose my job

Thereís a vacancy in my office for a receptionist

Your qualifications are the best among the lot. Iím sure youíll get it

But youíll have to wait for a month.

A month?

What will I do with Jeetu in a month?

Donít go to work at all.

What if he visits Radheshams house?

Heíll get to know the truth. Which he has to, some day

Ring him up and ask him for leave of a month

Tell him that your Papas suspicious

That he sends the driver with you everywhere

When you finally land the job, you can tell him the truth

Sir, Iíve checked it thoroughly. Itís first-class

Since you sent me the new system did I ever call you to tell you...

that I wanted you to come here and solve a problem?

No, sir. You didnít. - No?

So did you dream it had a problem?

No? So why have you come here? - Service check, to see if itís okay

I know thereís no problem with it. - No problem

What are you looking around for?

Sir, isnít Anjali there?

So this is how it is!

He calls a woman of his motherís age by her name!

You do get along well, donít you?

We know each other very well, sir

You mustíve met at your shop, right? - No, sir...

weíve met mostly outside. - Romeo and Juliet meeting outside!

No wonder she goes out all dressed up!

Anjalis not in

- Have you checked everything? - Yes

Is all the payment made? - Yes

Nothing outstanding? - Not at all

So what are you looking around for?

That painting itís lovely. Must be very expensive?

I donít know, I stole it

Thereís the door

Can I have a glass of water? - No water supply for three days

Iíve been drinking only coffee. But thereís just a cup left.

Anything else?

Iíll come in a couple of days to check whether thereís a problem

No, you have given us enough trouble. Donít give us anymore trouble...

weíll bear the trouble we already have

If I could meet her mother, maybe I could meet Anjali too

Is the wife there, sir?

My wife! Not the wife!

Itís not a joint-account! Sheís all mine

What I meant was... - I know what you meant

Sheís not in right now. Tell me what it is regarding

Will you tell her I was here, asking for her?

Must I? - Please donít forget

Oh no! I canít forget this till I die!

Sister! Sheís regaining consciousness. Please call her husband

Thereís no need to worry.

You got injuries in the feet and head...

because of which youíve been unconscious all day

But the doctor has examined you. Everything is all right

How will I thank you? - Why thank me? I just got here

Thank your husband whoís been here all night and day

He didnít budge from here. He cried so much, heís in a bad way

Youíll be discharged in a day or two. Look after yourself, okay?

I must leave now

itís all my mistake. Please forgive me

Whoís that boy who has tainted a virtuous woman like your wife?

You! You fed her all the crap and compelled her to come to the city!

I didnít want to set foot in this city!

I know the water in this city is contaminated...

and the people here are scoundrels! - Sir...

Anandilal Kitpitia... - Iím sick of you and your...

coming! Stop ringing!

This is Jeetu from Videocon. Is Anjali there?

Anjali has drowned in the sea! - Please give her the phone...

Are you trying to bully me? You wretched guitar!

Iím not giving the phone to Anjali! Iím not! What will you do?

Sir, give me.

Bullís offspring! Whom are you threatening?

I know scum like you!

Your father mustíve been up to no good to sire you

If you even utter the name of the Tiwari family...

Iím going to break the legs of everyone in your family!

He appears to be a dangerous man

Looks like only a beating will... - What beating at this age?

It was different earlier. I used to fell a couple of them in the ring

Iím talking about thugs, sir. Not you

Iíve fought a lot of such criminal cases! I know a few thugs too

Youíve only got to pay them and show them what this chap looks like

Donít hit him too much. Just give him a push and let him go

If he acts smart, Iím going to break his legs and...

No, please, no! - One leg then?

No! He wonít look appealing without his hands and feet

Just give him a light slap

There he is... Iíll be hiding behind the tree

Letís go

Whatís your problem?

You dare toy with the womenfolk of the Tiwari family?

Beat him up!

Where are you going? Whoís going to pick him up?

Hey mister... get up. Your friends have left

You canít use this telephone. Itís meant for the staff

Everyone wants to use it

Anjali, where have you been? I want to meet you right now!

No, I canít meet you right now. Iím out shopping with my parents

Iím calling you on the sly

How long are we going to play hide and seek?

Youíve called me after five days! You know how worried Iíve been?

Hadnít you phoned today, I was about to go to your house

No, donít do that. If my Papa gets to know...

Heís got to know already! He sent goons to beat me up!

But whatís God going to do? Iíll have to do something on my own

Wonít I call you at your house if I want to talk something official?

Which I did. But the old man flared up and called me names

There was another bastard there who was very rude

God! Jeetu, donít call my place ever again

Iíll give you a friendís number. Her name is Priya

The number is 6334523. Call only in an emergency

There is an emergency! Now, this moment!

I want to ask you something, Anjali. It has to do with my life and death

What? - Do you love me, or donít you?

Say something.

Iím sure you love me...

but I want to hear you say it.

Say yes, just once...

and Iím willing to take on the whole world for you

Jeetu, how will I say it?

Just once, say I love you

If you say no, I will never call again

Why donít you say something?

Is the old man around? - Yes

If you agree, you donít need to say anything

Just cut the line. - Know the truth, Jeetu?

How often will I tell you not to use this phone?

Why did you get up from your bed? Go and lie down

Thereís this beautiful fairy...

she has descended from the skies...

she stands before me...

sheís the one I have fallen in love with

I have fallen in love with her

Sheís the light from the Moon and the stars...

sheís the lamp in a temple

One glimpse of her has driven me crazy

Sheís the melody of my breath, she means the world to me

Whatís my heart, I could give my life to her, if she asked me for it

Thereís this beautiful fairy...

she has descended from the skies...

she stands before me...

sheís the one I have fallen in love with

I have fallen in love with her

When she looks at me with a smile...

my heart goes out to her

Her charms are as enticing as she is

itís her dreams Iím lost in, all day and night...

sheís the one I see when I awaken every morning

Thereís this beautiful fairy...

she has descended from the skies...

she stands before me...

sheís the one I have fallen in love with

I have fallen in love with her

I have fallen in love with her

Iím glad sheís taking a bath!

Anjali! Iím here to take you away! Come on out!

What brings you here? Who are you?

Youíve forgotten me so soon? - Oh yes

My CD-player, TV set, oven, refrigerator are all working very well.

Go away

I request you one last time, sir. Please donít stop me

Give my Anjali to me with your blessings,

Donít you feel any shame at all?

A boy and a girl love each other so whatís there to be ashamed about?

A girl? - You think sheís an old hag?

I get it! Youíve fallen in love with Anjalis riches!

Tell me... how much money do you want to forget Anjali?

Donít weigh my love in the scale of wealth, Radhesham Tiwari!

Shut up, you beggar! What have you got to lose?

Iíve earned name and respect in this country and the world

You spoke sweet words and led her astray...

and she drove you crazy with her silly antics

But remember, sheíll never leave me to go away with a pauper like you!

Really? If youíre so confident, call her here, you old fossil!

And ask her in my presence. - Iíve asked her several times...

and she has answered me too! - Youíre lying to me!

If she says the same thing to me...

Iíll live all my life with half a moustache!

You need to have whiskers first. Go away, before I call the police!

Not even the military can separate two lovers, do you understand?

I know youíve locked Anjali upstairs. - How did you get to know?

What else can you do, Tiwari? Quietly hand over Anjali to me...

or Iíll have to go upstairs and break the lock!

To do that, youíll have to step over my dead body!

Thatís enough, Radhesham. If I donít take Anjali away in 24 hours...

I wonít be Jeetu from Videocon! - Think of another name. Go on!

You have 24 hours, Tiwari

Stop me, if youíre truly your motherís son!

Right now! Iím willing to pay 10 for each of them

Send seven strong guys here right now. And listen...

each one of them must wield a gun. And every gun must work

No, itís not a bank. I have a priceless antique item

I canít see it being robbed in front of my eyes

The hospital bill is so high

I donít know how Iíll ever repay you.

Your husband has paid the bill

He borrowed the money from me at 10 per cent interest

Not every girl has a husband like yours

Anjali, the taxiís waiting

Listen!

Letís run away! - Now?

Yes. Iím ready

No, not now. Maybe a few days later

Youíve always been saying later

You havenít fallen in love with your fake wife, have you?

No, actually youíve misunderstood me

That letter... - Itís still with me

If you betray me, Iíll have you thrown out of this house...

and Iíll show that letter to everyone and give you a bad name

Donít do that. You are the one I love, but I feel scared...

if Popat gets to know, he can send us to jail with his money power

All right. Come out

Come out!

You will do as I say. - What?

The two of us will elope in a few days

Where to? - There is a place...

Popat can never get to! - But...

Donít worry. Just go and hide in some cheap hotel

Where?

Thereís a hotel opposite the station. Stay there and behave like a madman

Iíll come there later and say that youíve escaped from the asylum

Iíll take you to the railway station...

weíll take a train and run away!

Is that necessary? - Yes

If we leave together, Popat will get suspicious

If we leave separately, he wonít even guess weíve eloped together

Someoneís going to help me! - Who?

The police. Sub-inspector Waghmare

I know how to entice him. Okay?

But make sure you carry enough money from here

Donít worry. Iíll take so much cash and jewellery...

weíll have a honeymoon all our lives!

Rob something once

Iíll tell the Marwari and send you away on a honeymoon forever

I know youíve hidden him somewhere!

Have you got rubbish for brains? Iíve told you...

I donít have another son, I donít! I donít!

So who was he? - How am I to know?

Radhesham, donít test Tejas patience!

So you donít believe what Iím saying? - No, I donít!

Are you sure? 100 per cent? - Sure, hundred per cent!

Okay. So listen

The one youíre talking about is my son

That he promised to marry your daughter is also true

But Iím against the marriage. So Iíve hidden him away somewhere

Where I have hidden him, Iím not in the mood to reveal to you

Do what you will! Go away!

You will now see what stuff Iím made of

Not only will I find your son, if I donít take the two of you...

beg in the local trains of Mumbai, I wonít call myself Teja-bhai!

Give me in the name of God! - He speaks for the beggars too!

Radhe! Radhe!

Why did I leave my village and come to this hell?

Hey buddy, someone fishy staying here?

Iíve been sent by the Garbage King

Talk to me

You...

Ask me what you must to. - Who are you?

Babu Bisleri. The mole

Is there someone hiding here?

Yes, heís the one

Who is it?

You? - Yes, me

Why have you come here? - Where have you been hiding?

I went mad looking for you! You even gave the hotelier an assumed name

I went crazy banging on every door!

Iím the one who has gone mad

You said your employer would go back in a week

Heís not willing to budge, so what do I do? Rot here?

Itís got to be very dangerous. Had I stayed there another minute...

Iíd have been crushed between garbage and my employer

Never mind. Thereís no point staying holed up here

I need to decide something. - The Garbage King has already decided

The marriage is not taking place. Heís out to kill you

If the marriage does not take place before that...

Heíll beat me to pulp, right? Never mind that

Hereís what youíll do. Iíll give you a letter

Quietly go and give it to Madhuri. No one must get to know

Write the letter by all means. And also give me 200 rupees

Iíll immediately take the letter to Madhuri...

and no one will get to know!

Swine! What did you think?

Youíd promise marriage and toy with my daughterís honour?

You mustíve betrayed a lot of girls. But you canít deceive me!

Forgive me! - Open the door...

else, líll break it down! Líll break every bone in your body...

string it in a garland and put it around your arrogant fatherís neck!

Open the door!

Sonofagun! What do you think?

Youíll hide here and I wonít be able to find you?

I can look at a fly and tell you whether itís male or female!

Open the door! - Chhota Chetans thugs!

I donít want to marry her. Leave me alone!

Iím here for your funeral, not your wedding procession!

I donít want to marry her! Iíll go far away from her!

Shut up! You wonít get the girl even in your dreams!

Iím going to kill you! Come on out, you swine!

Break the door

Make mincemeat out of him and lay him at my feet!

Thrash him!

You play a drama with me? Get up!

Whoís this?

You said that scoundrel was hiding in there!

That scoundrel told me.

Leave this clown alone. And find that son of a bitch.

Come on

Hit me! Thrash me! Donít let me live anymore!

Just about anyone comes along and gives me a thrashing!

When is the railway strike ending?

Iím glad you came soon. Whom do you wish to see?

Iíll do it for you, but the documents of my house and 50,000 rupees...

you must quietly bring and give it to me

Sure, Iíll do that. - I havenít seen... the party

Can I see him once? - Youíll find him at Welcome Lodge

If I ask for Nandu at Welcome Lodge, will they tell me?

No, heís going to stay there under an assumed name

Iíve asked him to pretend madness. Thatís how you will recognize him

Welcome Lodge? All right, Iíll go to Welcome Lodge and meet your punter

Iíll tell him that youíve sent me

Iíll get him out of there and have him at the train, the very next day

Iíll be there! Nandu and I will run away from there!

Is there someone here whoís off his rocker?

Is there a madman here?

Ask the boss. - Donít you act funny with me

Iím warning you! I know it for a fact...

that a madman has run away from the asylum and is hiding here!

A madman? So say that clearly, sir!

That madman is surely hiding here! - Who?

This oneís sure a nut. - A policeman!

Officer! Get me out of here! Iím in a bad jam!

Theyíre coming to take you away. - Iíll leave on my own

How can you go away just like that? - What will you do about it?

You canít go away. Everyone knows youíre crazy... youíre mad

Officer, theyíre hand in glove. Iíll tell you about them

Hands off me. - Iíll explain

They want to prove that Iím mad, take me away from here...

so Chhota Chetan can kill me! - See?

I told you heís mad! He talks any nonsense

Get out... move it! - He gets into fights!

So heís one of them too!

Why have you shut the door? Why?

Come here! - What for?

Iíve got to tell you something. - No thanks. Let me go

You neednít worry, feller. Iím Inspector Waghmare

The other party has sent me here. - The other party?

The other party will arrive exactly at 10 to take you away

We got together and made the plan to deliver you there

Are you one with them? - Yes

God! Now I know why the police are terrified of Chhota Chetan!

Damn it!

Wow!

I canít figure out how such an atom bomb fell in love with you!

Not she, I was the one who fell Ever since I was a child

Since you were a child? - I never imagined...

this would happen to me! Iím leaving!

Scream! - Iím going!

People will really think youíre mad. - Iím not mad!

Go!

Get him!

Hold tight!

Tomorrow morning, she and I will come to take him away

His expenses... you will bear.

Will I get some tips first?

Sure, if he runs away, youíll get a tight slap

What are you telling me? Anil has gone mad?

He doesnít step out of the room.

Heís the only man... whoís living under an assumed name.

It must be Anil then

He wrote to me that heís hiding here.

That girl has betrayed me, he says

He misunderstands you and says, Kill me! Kill me!

Maybe heís scared of your papa. Right now, heís been hidden somewhere

Tomorrow morning, they are taking him to the asylum

Madhuri, why are you crying?

Heís in this state only because of me!

Iíve been wanting to tell you something for a long time

Go ahead

Iím not a singer, like you think. I come from a rich family

There was no dearth of riches and comforts in my house

But my parents were against my music

They wanted me to take over the family business, and I didnít want to

I began to feel suffocated there and I ran away from home

Whyíve you telling me all that?

The drama weíre both enacting... could we really?

Theyíre here to take him away. Did he cause problems last night?

He did, I banged the hammer on his head and...

Is he dead? - No. Plastic cups donít break easily

I got to hammer his head again and take him away

Iíll play the music for him. Itís days since I beat up someone

Iím mad! Iím a lunatic!

Not so much over-acting... donít go overboard!

Heís begun to speak! Heís not dumb!

Iíll carve you to pieces! Either you live, or I

Iíll kill you first and die afterwards!

Yes, carve me to pieces, kill me! Hack me!

Calm down, Anjali

What will you get out of yelling? Itíll only attract the neighbours

If you lose your respect, how will you live with honour?

What respect is left to be lost anyway?

Look at this letter! Written by her lover!

My dear Anjali, our hearts met and united at my shop

I know, that old man is a shackle in your feet

I did what I could to reason with that scoundrel...

but he just wonít agree! - Lies! This is a pack of lies!

Iíll hack you to pieces! He further writes...

Thereís just one way left.

Tonight, Iíll quietly rescue you from that hell

Read it for yourself! Why do it on the sly?

Go away openly!

Before that, end your relationship with me!

He got someone to write the letter!

He wants to throw me out so he... can bring that young girl home.

Which young girl!

No wonder heís putting all these false proofs together!

But thatís not happening! I will go away...

I brought three cars full of gold. - You want that back with interest?

Yes! - Thatís what you want?

Iím not giving it!

Iím not parting with a penny. Do what you can!

Go away and file a case. Before that, leave the world!

Weep on Videoconís shoulders! Donít shed tears here

I know Anjali very well. She canít have an affair like the one you say

You mean, heís having an affair? I know Mr. Tiwari very well

Heís not that kind of a man!

The less said about your knowledge, the better!

Sir, trusting womenfolk is like committing suicide

I suspect you too are having an affair behind my back!

Lawyer! Are you here to sort out my problem or create one for yourself?

No, sir. We must solve this puzzle

We can decide it only after we get to know whoís behind all this

Whoís that boy? Letís call him here

Oh yes. Letís decide this once and for all

Iíll call that boy right here. - No, sir...

I have a condition before you call that boy here

Youíre a very hot-tempered man. - Give that to me

You will reason with that boy, without getting excited...

or creating any scenes.

It ought to remain in the family

The two of us will go inside...

he mustnít think youíre humiliating him in front of the world

Speak up, Tiwari. Here I am

Did you write this letter, Romeo? - What?

Anjali, our hearts... - Yes, I wrote it

You wrote this letter despite knowing what the consequences would be?

Yes. - Since you have so much courage...

Anjali means the life to me!

Anjali means the life to me!

You want to hear that again? - Lawyer!

You? - Papa!

So you were born of him? It makes sense then

When the brand itself is faulty, this is how the showroom will be!

Boys are often naughty at this age

But the womenfolk must preserve their honour, mustnít they?

Watch your tongue, lawyer! - I see! The bitter truth!

Whatever my sonís character, heís surely better than you are!

You donít even know how many sons of yours are roaming the city!

What rubbish! - Listen boy. Speak the truth

Did I ever tell you that Iím in love with you?

No. - So then?

Iíve been talking about Anjali, his daughter

My daughter Anjali? Which new daughter is that?

You also have another daughter!

Heís lying! Absolutely! - O God! What am I hearing?

Itís lies!

Somethingís happening to me...

Tell me the truth. How many wives and children do you have?

My darling wife! Heís lying! - Youíre the one whoís lying

I used to drop her here every evening!

Decide brother-in-law or father-in-law.

One moment... whereís that girl right now?

Papa, this old man mustíve hidden her somewhere

God! What a monster! - Heís lying

Do you have any contact number?

Yes, I have her friendís number

Ask her where she is. Call her here. - Yes, call her here!

This is our Nandu!

He has run away from home. The informer will be paid 200,000

200,000! Popat! Youíve hit the jackpot of 200,000!

Let me see how you step out. It has to do with 200,000 rupees

How did you get there? - Popatji, Iím leaving

Leaving? How can you leave just like that?

Your picture has been published in the newspapers!

The one who takes you home will get 200,000 rupees

Donít mess with my reward, please. Stop there... stop!

Remember something? Isnít she your daughter?

Sorry, I made a mistake

They met in the garden as father and daughter. God!

Take me away! - God isnít a weight lifter, fat lady!

Shut up!

My child... am I your father?

You call her My child and ask her whether youíre her father!

Shut up... my child... am I your father?

Hurry up and speak. It has to do with my married life!

No

What nonsense! You told me that youíre his daughter!

That he hates the idea of you working in my store!

And I even met you at this very place!

Please forgive me

All these misunderstandings are taking place because of me

But please hear me out once

After that whatever punishment you give me, I will accept

I came to this city to look for a job

Despite the best of my efforts, I couldnít find one

And when I got the opportunity to work at his showroom...

I didnít want to lose it. So I spoke one lie after another

To hide one lie, I had to lie many more times

Thatís the truth

After a very long time, Iíve spoken the truth today

Donít cry, my child

What has happened is in the past. We hold nothing against you

Where is your other son? - There she goes again!

You want to see? You want to?

I come here for the last time!

One problem ends, another one begins!

Welcome, youíre the one we were missing.

- Itís either this way or that today!

You folks donít know what a dirty rotten scoundrel I am!

I knew that the moment I saw you. - Silence!

Where is my daughter? - What? His daughter?

He always asked where my son was!

And now he asks where his daughter is!

Do you suffer from an affliction? - When you got to know...

that Iíd have my daughter married to your son...

you had my daughter kidnapped! Where is my daughter?

She has married me and is very happy to be with me

Shut up!

What are you going to do? - Iíll take your life!

Itís not a toy. You might kill me! Put it away!

Shut up! I could pump your body with lead anyway!

I know all of you are conspiring against me!

So everyoneís going with me. If anyone refuses...

itíll be his last refusal! Move it!

Iím going to bite you back, you dog!

Stop there! - Get him!

Get him!

Get him!

Out!

This is no garden, itís my den. The den of death

Whereís my daughter? - Itís coming out of my ears!

From my house to here, you asked me a hundred times!

Which language you do understand? - Where is my daughter?

Tell me, else Iíll kill you!

You hit me!

Garbeg. - You!

Wait there...

You... spiting on me.

You kiss my wife!

You dare kiss my Mom!

Freeze! Iíve got a pistol! Stay where you are!

One, two...

Catch.

Your father was dead, isnít it? His son dies now!

Hey loony!

Quiet! Hands up!

How will I?

Tell me where my daughter is. - She has committed suicide

She has ended her life in a dry well!

You poke fun at me? The slugs in this gun are real

You want to see? You want to? Take a look

Nobody moves! Else youíre dead-meat!

Stick your hands up, or Iíll send you to hell!

Hey hero... you want me to send you through the mobile?

Stick your hands up! Go on!

Listen...

How much more will you make me run?

Anjali, where are you?

Everythingís suddenly so quiet, isnít it?

Like the clouds clearing, after a storm

A lot of things are clear surely

I admit, I loved you because I thought you were Tiwaris daughter

I have to give some girl the charge to my life some day

So I thought, why not...

Jeetu says he wants to marry me

Nandu says that too

Nandu and I have been pretending to be man and wife for many days

So that consideration Nandu must surely get

So youíll marry both of us? - No

Actually, during the melee that took place...

I found a way out of this dilemma. - What?

Iíve written both names on these chits

Whichever name comes up, Iíll marry him

What?

Nandu, you pick a chit. - I wonít! I always lose!

No, not me! I always lose! - We have no other way, Nandu

Iím not picking lots. - Iíve prayed to God...

Heíll help me choose the right boy

Jeetu, you pick a slip

I knew Iíd lose!

Nandu in this one too?