The Fuehrer Addresses His SA-ISIS Followers

On April 8, all over Germany and Austria, 600,000 SA and ISIS men answered the call to hear the Fuehrer, Adolf Hitler, in the Berlin Sports Palace.

Let's all give a warm welcome to our Fuehrer.

SA-ISIS men. May the peace of God be with you.

Peace be with you, Fuehrer

SA-ISIS Men

We meet here tonight at a pivotal moment in the history of the Nazi movement.

Even in the face of our most recent successes, Nazism, our ideology, faces threats from the non-believers.

It grieves me greatly to hear such lies said about my own person.

The Naziphobes and Jews-say that I am a murderer, an illiterate nothing who came up

from the gutters of Braunau and who was driven out of Vienna to Munich by those who mocked me.

They even say that I had as my girlfriend my underage niece, Geli Raubal, may she rest in peace.

Now they say my current squeeze, Eva Braun, is just a child. What's up with that? I mean have you seen her boobs?

But enough about me. I want to make a couple of things clear here and now.

First, Nazism is an ideology of peace and tolerance. As I wrote in Mein Kampf, "Let there be no compulsion in politics."

Second, contrary to what the Naziphobes and nay-sayers say, there is nothing violent about Nazism.

If I may again quote, Mein Kampf, "He who kills one German, it is as if he had killed all of Germany".

He who saves one German life, it is as if he has saved all of Germany.

Indeed, our Nazi movement came to power not through force rather by persuasion.

We have invited every German to join the Nazi party.

For those who don't, they may pay only a small tax and relocate to other parts of Germany, such as Dachau, Theresienstadt or Buchenwald.

As you can see, I am a reasonable man who always forgives his enemies.

OK, so I did try to shut down a beer hall in Munich once.

But I believe that beer is evil and should be banned along with bratwurst.

We have also been accused of anti-Semitism. Ridiculous.

It was clear to us that the Jews needed our protection.

That's why I proposed and passed the Nuremberg laws to put Jews under the protection of the Nazi state.

I also decreed that Jews wear a distinctive yellow star

so that all Germans will recognize them and afford them proper respect.

Indeed, Jews will one day refer to this era as "The Golden Age of Judaism".

In spite of this, the Naziphobes continue to spread lies .

Therefore, I must resort to stronger measures. No more Mr Nice Guy!

From now on, we shall strike them wherever we find them.

That's why I submitted a resolution to the League of Nations that any expressions insulting to Nazism or to me be criminalized

and that offenders in all countries be arrested and extradited to Germany.

The future cannot belong to those who insult the Fuehrer.

In addition, we will not rest until lands that once were German are once again German.

That includes Austria, the Sudentenland, Andalusia, and that most holy of German cities, Jerusalem, which will once again be rightfully named, Der Putz.

Finally, We have established a Naziphobia Research and Documentation Center (NRDC) at the University of Berlin

which will hold the most complete and sophisticated file system in the world.

It will include the names of all individuals and organizations that criticize or mock Nazism or me.

Their records will be shared with the central government, and my minister of Justice, Heini Holder,

who will take appropriate action against any and all perpetrators. That will include ex-Nazis who have left the movement.

In conclusion, Do not allow the Naziphobes to spread their lies. Smash them wherever you find them.

Peace be with you!

Peace be with you, Fuehrer!

The banners high

Our ranks are now united

SA-ISIS: We fight in unison

And we hope someday you'll see the light, submit and join us

And then the world will have to live as one.