The Shooting AKA Dear Sister

Hey, man. Whatcha doing?

Nothing, just, uh.

Writing a letter to my sister.

Cool.

Yeah, it's pretty crazy.

I, uh, I haven't seen her in years.

It's, uh, it's weird because

[gun shot]

Music: Mmm, whatcha say?

Mm, that you only meant well?

Well, of course you did.

Mmm, whatcha say?

Mm, that it's all for the best?

Of course it is.

Mmm, what you say?

Mm, that it's just what we need?

And you decided this.

Mmm, what you say?

Mmm, what did she say?

[panting]

[gun shot]

Mmm, what you say?

Mm, that you only meant well?

Well, of course you did.

Mmm, what you say?

Mm, that it's all for the best?

Of course it is.

Mmm, what you say?

Mm, that it's just what we need?

And you decided this.

Mmm, what you say?

Mmm, what did she say?

Ransom notes keep falling out your mouth.

Man: [laughs] Oh, guys.

I just thought of the funniest thing.

[gun shot]

Mmm, what you say?

Mm, that you only meant well?

Well, of course you did.

Mmm, what you say?

Mm, that it's all for the best?

Of course it is.

Mmm, what you say?

Mm, that it's just what we need?

And you decided this.

Mmm, what you say?

Mmm, what did she say?

[voiceover]: Dear sister,

By the time you read this

[gun shot]

Mmm, what you say?

Mm, that you only meant

[gun shot]

Mmm, what you say?

Mm,

[gun shot] Mmm, what you say?

[gun shot] Mmm, what you

[gun shots]

Mmm, what you say?

[gun shot] Mmm, what you say?

[gun shot] Mmm, what you

[gun shot] Mmm, what you

[gun shots]

[gun shot] Mmm, what you say?

Mm, that you only meant well?

[police siren]

[whistles]

We got ourselves a bloodbath.

Hey, Sarge, listen to this:

Dear sister,

By the time you read this, I'll be dead.

This is how I think it's gonna happen:

Dave will shoot me, then I'll shoot Dave,

then Eric will enter and get shot by Dave,

then you'll come in and get shot

by Eric, Dave, and I multiple times.

Love, your brother Keith.

[laughs]

P. S. Then two cops will read this

letter and shoot each other.

Isn't that the most ridiculous thing you

[gun shot] Mmm, what you say?

[gun shots]

Music overlaps: Mm, that you only meant well?

Mm, that you only meant well?

Mm, that it's all for the best?

Mmm, what you say?