How can I see my father in myself when I have never met him?

Zen master Thich Nhat Hanh,Thay, answers questions. May 2014. Plum Village Monastery, France.

(Half Bell)

(Bell)

Dear Thay, I never met my father,

so there will always be this longing
I have to meet him.

You learn here to recognize
our grandfather or our grandmother or father

in ourselves.

So my question is:
how do I practice to see my father

when I never met him or have seen him?

There are people
who see their father every day,

but have not really met him.

I mean that there are couples: there are
fathers and sons, fathers and daughters

who see each other every day, but
there is no communication between them.

They see the other person, yes, but
they have not really met the other person

because there is no communication;
there is no love;

there is no understanding.

So, in that case,

to see a father every day

that's not true happiness

because there is no understanding,
no love.

But if you practice looking deeply,
meditation,

you will see that you are
the continuation of your father.

And this is the truth.

You are not only the continuation
of your father, but you ARE your father.

You cannot take your father out of you.

Look at the cloud in the sky.

The cloud may become the rain

and the rain may become the tea.

And when you look at the tea
you can see the cloud.

It's not so difficult to see
the cloud in the tea.

So when you look into yourself

is not difficult to see
your father in you.

You are not only

the continuation of your father,

you ARE your father.

The rain IS the cloud.

And the tea IS the rain and the cloud.

So the appearance is not
the most important thing.

It is the content.

So if you can smile with joy and peace,

your father is smiling with joy and peace
at the same time.

And you carry your father always with you.

When you make a step
that is full of peace and joy,

your father is making this step
at the same time with you.

And you are closer, closer to your father
than you might have thought.

And you can talk to your father
at any time.

My own father, he has not died

and he walks with me every day.

He breathes with me every day
and I talk to him.

The cloud has not died.

It is now a new form:
the rain or the tea.

So you can talk to the cloud,
and you can drink your cloud.

And meditation can help us see
things deeply like that.

And when we are able to see
things like that we can remove

all kind of afflictions, and regret,
and sadness, and suffering.

(Half Bell)

(Bell)