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← Why are Anxiety and Depression Connected? | Kati Morton

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  1. - Hey everybody.

  2. Today we're gonna talk about
    depression and anxiety,
  3. and why they seem to be so connected.
  4. But before we jump into that,
  5. did you know I wrote a book?
  6. It's called Are u ok?
  7. And it's available for pre order now.
  8. In the book, I talk about all
    things mental health related
  9. like what's the difference
  10. between mental health and mental illness?
  11. How do we diagnose depression and anxiety?
  12. What type of treatment should I get
  13. if I am struggling,
  14. and also how to manage
    toxic relationships.
  15. So click the link at the
    top of the description
  16. and pre order now.
  17. By pre ordering you get signed book plates
  18. and some special giveaways, so hop on it.
  19. Now let's jump into today's topic.
  20. Now, by simply watching
    my diagnoses videos
  21. about depression and anxiety,
  22. you can easily think that
    they are vastly different.
  23. On one hand a depressed person
  24. doesn't like doing anything they used to.
  25. They can feel hopeless and sad.
  26. And have changes in their
    diet and sleep patterns.
  27. A person with anxiety can
    feel like they're living
  28. in a state of extreme agitation,
  29. being on edge most of the day,
  30. and worrying about anything
  31. and everything happening in their life.
  32. These two mental illnesses
  33. seem to be on the opposite
    ends of the spectrum,
  34. not related to one another at all.
  35. However, it's important to note
  36. that statistically speaking
  37. the most common form of depression
  38. is actually what we call
    agitated depression,
  39. meaning that someone
    will feel both hopeless,
  40. empty, and lack enjoyment,
  41. while also feeling on edge, irritable,
  42. and worrying about all things
    going on in their life.
  43. Many of my patients who are struggling
  44. with agitated depression
    feel like they're caught
  45. in a terrible cycle,
    because they'll feel bad
  46. and lonely and empty, et cetera,
  47. then they'll pick a fight with someone
  48. who tries to help them or support them
  49. 'cause they're just
    feeling like total shit
  50. and then go right back
    to feeling terrible again
  51. and that cycle just
    goes and goes and goes.
  52. And many people also share
    how they'll be tired all day
  53. feeling low, and completely unmotivated,
  54. but then at night they can't sleep.
  55. I even had a patient back in the day
  56. who struggled to stop her
    mind from running through
  57. each and every conversation
    she had had that day,
  58. and how she could have been better,
  59. more understanding, or less awkward.
  60. This can be exhausting,
  61. I know many of you told me the same thing,
  62. that you feel tired all day
  63. and then you can't sleep at night.
  64. Ugh, so annoying!
  65. Now it's not only the agitated depression
  66. that connects anxiety to depression.
  67. Research also shows that this link
  68. has more to do with how
    those with depression
  69. and anxiety manage stress.
  70. Whenever we're bombarded
    with the stress in our life
  71. those with anxiety and depression
  72. tend to deal with it through avoidance.
  73. Meaning when stress comes our way
  74. and we're pushed into our fight,
    flight or freeze response,
  75. we choose flight.
  76. I mean think about it,
  77. neither depression nor
    anxiety is decisive,
  78. confident or pushy.
  79. And to take it even further,
  80. anxiety is characterized by avoidance.
  81. I mean if we know something's
    gonna make us anxious or upset
  82. we're gonna avoid it, obviously.
  83. And when depressed, we
    don't think very highly
  84. of ourselves or our abilities,
  85. and therefore we tend to avoid situations
  86. or challenges, rather than jump right in.
  87. And in the therapy world
    we call that withdrawal.
  88. So you can see that with anxiety
  89. your obsessions about
    failure are fear laden.
  90. Whereas with depression,
  91. your rumination reflects
    intense discouragement
  92. to the point of hopelessness of despair.
  93. But in both cases you're
    feeling overwhelmed
  94. because of lack of self confidence
  95. and that's the real issue
    behind feeling overwhelmed.
  96. Like, the root of the root.
  97. You know how I'm always talking,
  98. to get to the root of
    the root of the issue.
  99. And so if that's the case
    behind feeling like this
  100. it can in turn lead us to either anxiety,
  101. depression, or a veritable combination
  102. of these two painful feelings.
  103. Furthermore much of the symptoms
  104. of depression and anxiety
    really do overlap.
  105. Here are just some of the symptoms
  106. you will see in both diagnoses:
  107. sleep disturbance, tearfulness,
  108. worry, loss of appetite,
    loss of sex drive,
  109. lack of motivation, body aches,
    difficulty concentrating,
  110. and that's just to name a few.
  111. So it is easy to see why many of us
  112. find ourselves toggling back and forth
  113. between depression to anxiety
  114. and even experiencing them
    both at the same time.
  115. Or on the other hand,
  116. possibly being diagnosed with one
  117. when we really have the other.
  118. But like anything I talk about
  119. I always wanna end with what we can do
  120. to better manage the symptoms.
  121. So let's get into that.
  122. Oh, and also, I know that we have
  123. a lot of new community members.
  124. Welcome!
  125. So if you have a question or topic
  126. that you want me to talk about,
  127. please search my name and any keywords
  128. associated with your question or issue.
  129. I have over a thousand videos
  130. so chances are I've
    already talked about it.
  131. Okay, now into the tips and tools.
  132. Number one, since our hypothesis
  133. is that lack of self confidence
  134. and our flight response
    is what's leading us
  135. to having our anxious
    or depressive symptoms,
  136. you knew this tip was coming,
  137. notice your self talk!
  138. It's so common that we
    just believe our thoughts,
  139. like I'm lazy, or my feelings are stupid,
  140. or I'm not good enough.
  141. Start paying attention to how you speak
  142. to yourself and maybe start
    using bridge statements.
  143. Bridge statements are things
    that you say to yourself
  144. when the positive or
    completely opposite things
  145. don't feel like real, right or attainable.
  146. So for example, if we're
    struggling with the thought
  147. I'm not good enough, a
    bridge statement would be
  148. I may not be as bad as I think
    I am, I mean, it's possible.
  149. We don't have to say
  150. I'm amazing and I'm way more than enough
  151. I love myself, because
    we won't believe that.
  152. Let's just be honest, right?
  153. And yes, you know, I've
    talked about faking it
  154. 'til I make it, and that
    does help some people,
  155. but most of us need a
    bridge to get us there.
  156. And so that's what those statements are.
  157. So I encourage you to give it a try.
  158. Try to notice the five most common
  159. negative thoughts you have, and argue back
  160. with some thoughtful bridge statements.
  161. And then after some time
  162. you'll be able to argue
    back with positive ones,
  163. or better yet, maybe you won't even have
  164. those nasty thoughts at all anymore.
  165. Number two, getting into talk therapy.
  166. It can really be so helpful, I promise.
  167. Having someone we can go to to talk with
  168. who doesn't know anything other
    than what we share with them
  169. can be so life changing.
  170. Now, obviously we need to make sure
  171. that we like our therapist,
  172. that we feel they're a good fit for us,
  173. but getting into talk therapy
  174. can help us better understand
    our anxiety or depression.
  175. And make sure that we're
    properly diagnosed.
  176. Remember I always talk
    about how important it is
  177. to spend time with a clinician,
  178. meaning like therapist,
    counselor, psychologist, whomever,
  179. we have to spend a lot of time with them
  180. before they can truly diagnose us.
  181. So allow yourself to make
    sure they're a good fit
  182. and feel like they really listen to you
  183. and then talk about your diagnosis
  184. and make sure that you both agree on it.
  185. And the therapist can also help us
  186. manage those symptoms
    that we're talking about.
  187. They find CBT to be a really
    helpful style of therapy.
  188. So feel free to ask your therapist
  189. if they utilize that style as well.
  190. And if you're wondering what CBT even is,
  191. I'll link my video about it
    in the description below.
  192. Tip number three, while
    medication can not make us
  193. like ourselves or feel more confident
  194. it can help alleviate the other symptoms
  195. of anxiety or depression
  196. that we may be experiencing.
  197. I've talked about this a lot in the past
  198. but if we feel like we're
    just drowning in the symptoms
  199. unable to even implement one of the tips
  200. that our therapist or other
    mental health professional
  201. has given us, medication
    can be that life raft,
  202. can help you get your head, you know,
  203. just above water enough so you
    can finally breathe (sighs)
  204. and do the work that you're
    gonna need to do to get better.
  205. And I do not encourage
    just if you're wondering
  206. I don't encourage people
    to only be on medication
  207. and not be in therapy,
  208. because medication when it
    comes to mental health issues
  209. doesn't really fix anything.
  210. It merely masks the symptoms
    that tell us something's wrong.
  211. And so working together,
  212. medication and therapy, I believe
    to be the most beneficial.
  213. And research does too, just FYI.
  214. And fourth and finally, resourcing.
  215. Now I've been talking
    about this more and more
  216. when it comes to trauma therapy,
  217. but I honestly believe that resourcing
  218. can be beneficial to anyone
    working on themselves.
  219. Resourcing's really just a fancy way
  220. of saying we need to have
    places, people, and things
  221. we can reach out to or do
    when we start to feel bad.
  222. This could be a happy place
    that we go to in our mind
  223. or petting an animal, if
    that always calms us down.
  224. It works for me.
  225. Or even in your therapy appointments
  226. that place could be like a safe haven
  227. to go to in your mind or to
    show up for your appointment.
  228. And the more resources
    that we have the better
  229. and also making sure that these things
  230. we can do regardless of the time of day
  231. is really important,
    too, because we all know
  232. nights can be the toughest.
  233. And yes these are similar
    to distraction techniques
  234. or coping skills, but they're
    just a little bit deeper.
  235. These need to be things or people
  236. that can help pull us out of
    those negative thought spirals
  237. and keep us feeling
    grounded fairly quickly.
  238. So take some time,
  239. consider what your resources
    are and write them down
  240. so they're available when you need them.
  241. And I hope you found this video helpful.
  242. As always, let me know down
    in those comments below
  243. how you experience the connection
  244. between anxiety and depression.
  245. Or if you think they're
    completely different
  246. and not connected at all.
  247. How does it feel to you?
  248. And most importantly, what has helped you
  249. to better manage it?
  250. Thank you so much for watching
  251. and I will see you next time, bye.