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I could start my story
in several different places.
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I could start when I was 8 years old
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and thought I had become a Christian.
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I could start when I was
in high school or college
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and had to continuously persuade myself
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that I was a Christian,
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but I think the best way to start my story
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is in a small hospital room
in Lexington, Kentucky
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where we didn't know
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if my dad was going to make it or not.
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Things didn't look good.
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He had been sick so much
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prior to that moment.
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There were days where we
thought that was the end.
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There were days that we thought
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he was going to be better
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and everything would be fine...
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until he finally passed away.
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When you stay for a long
time in a hospital room
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and you're not the one that's sick,
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there's a lot of waiting.
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There's a lot of wondering
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what's going to happen next.
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There's a lot of conversation that happens
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between you and the people
that are with you.
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One of the topics that came up
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when I was talking with my mom
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was about dad's last sermon.
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At the time, we didn't know
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it was going to be his last sermon,
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but mom talked about how powerful it was.
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And she actually even said it was one
of the best sermons she's ever heard.
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Dad had been sick a lot before that day
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and I think at the time,
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he was even having to sit
when he was preaching.
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And he just didn't have
much strength left in him.
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But the way my mom put it,
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it was like... it was a miracle
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just how much power he had
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when he began to preach.
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In his voice you can hear strength.
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You can hear the passion
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flowing through him.
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And this was a man who
was just weak from sickness
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and was hours I think
from going to the hospital
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because he was so sick.
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Dad always uploaded his sermons
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onto Sermon Audio
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where people around the world
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could listen to his sermons
and learn from them.
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And we learned that obviously
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the last sermon hadn't been uploaded
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to Sermon Audio.
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I was going to do that.
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I was in the hospital room.
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I had an Internet
connection and everything.
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I got the file for it.
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I listened to a couple of seconds of it
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and realized that the recording was off.
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There was some kind
of setting on the recording
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that just made it sound kind of strange
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like there were no breaths in between.
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And so, I kind of got frustrated with it.
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Thought about uploading it,
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then decided no,
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I'm just going to save it
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and not worry about it.
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So, I just put it on my desktop somewhere
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and didn't even think about it
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for several weeks after that.
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Something that will stick with me forever
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is seeing how my father
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handled himself in the hospital
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in the worst of times.
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My brother put it best
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when he was speaking at his funeral.
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I think he said that dad
finished his race sprinting.
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And there's no better
way to describe that.
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I remember the nurses
were putting in IV's,
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central lines, things like that,
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and dad would barely wince.
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But one time, he looked
up at one of the nurses
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who was trying to do a procedure
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that he couldn't be asleep for,
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and he just looked at him and said,
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"You know, I was about your
age when God saved me."
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And he's going through this painful,
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traumatic situation,
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and one person after another,
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after another, after another,
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he's telling them how God saved him.
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I had seen my dad witness
to people all the time,
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but not to this ferocity;
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not to this degree.
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He knew I needed to hear that too.
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And he was witnessing to me
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as much as he was witnessing
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to those people in the hospital.
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On April 29th, 2016, my dad passed away.
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Over the next few days
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just pounded with grief
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mixed with conviction,
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mixed with desperate feeling
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and need to be saved,
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a need for redemption,
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all mixed in together,
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I was in prayer more then than I think
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I ever had been previously.
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Just asking God to show me a way.
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Show me something.
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Show me how.
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I understood what it meant to be saved.
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I understood what it
meant to be a Christian.
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I understood the "process," if you will,
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but I didn't understand how to get there.
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I didn't understand what did it mean
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to truly have faith.
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Yeah, I believe in Jesus.
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I believe in all the
things that He's done.
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I get it.
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I don't understand at
what point do I have faith
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and I'm saved?
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At what point does that happen to me?
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When does that transformation happen?
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I have the belief, right?
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I'm saved.
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But I knew I wasn't,
so what was I missing?
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So what I prayed for,
I prayed for an answer.
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I prayed: God, I need an answer.
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I need You to show me
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what am I missing?
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What am I not seeing that my father saw?
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That other people I know have seen?
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They believed.
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They have faith.
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They're confident in their salvation.
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Where is my confidence?
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Where is my salvation?
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My father for his funeral
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wanted the Gospel to be preached.
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That's what he had always said
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I think to my mom.
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My brother spoke.
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Michael Durham spoke.
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Rob Pelkey spoke.
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And then Paul Washer spoke.
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I kind of thought in my head,
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well, okay, there is this group of men
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who know God, who are about to preach.
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As the lineup went, it would be
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Paul Washer who would simply
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preach the Gospel to the crowd
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that was there for dad's funeral.
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Many people have been
saved under his teaching.
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This whole funeral - I need to listen up.
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I need to really pay attention
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because God, I'm asking You
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to show me how to have faith.
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If I don't get it from this,
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then I'm not going to get it.
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The preachers spoke.
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They sat down, spoke, sat down.
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Spoke.
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We dismissed.
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And the Gospel was preached
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and it was preached well.
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What was said needed to be said,
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but I still didn't get it.
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I still didn't understand what I needed.
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For the next week, my wife and I
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stayed at my mom's house.
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One afternoon, I was
alone in my dad's office.
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And I was just going
through some of his stuff,
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some of his pictures
from mission trips,
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his journals.
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Then I remembered I had
the file of that sermon
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and I thought, well, you know,
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the recording was kind of messed up.
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I don't know what setting it was on.
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I don't know why it was messed up.
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But I never really did
listen to the sermon.
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And mom said it was his greatest.
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It was his last one.
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I should just give it a listen
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and see if it's worth putting up
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on Sermon Audio.
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So I played it.
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She was right.
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There were several things in the sermon
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that jumped out at me immediately.
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Things I had heard before,
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but never heard.
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I heard.
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My ears heard it,
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but I didn't truly hear it
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until that moment.
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Michael Morrow:
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There's a lot of people that believe
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Jesus was the Son of God.
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There are a lot of people who believe
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that Jesus Christ was born of a virgin.
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There's a lot of people
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who believe that Jesus came into the world
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to save sinners
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who have never personally trusted Him
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as their Savior.
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Jason: And then, the one thing he said
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that really just tipped me over the edge
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that was exactly what I needed to hear
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to finally realize
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what I needed for my salvation.
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Michael Morrow: There is a time
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when your heart quits trying to get to God
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and rests on the finished
work of Jesus Christ.
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Jason: I had never rested.
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I had never just given myself to Him,
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never given my full trust.
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That's what trust is. It's resting
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in His finished work.
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And I prayed. I said,
"Jesus, I rest in You.
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I rest in Your finished work
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in dying on the cross for my sins,
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in raising from the dead.
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I rest in that.
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You have given me life."
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What's crazy is I've
heard this a million times.
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Dad has preached this a million times.
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I've heard people's
testimonies a million times
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that it's not anything that I do.
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I know it's not a prayer that I pray.
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I know that it's not
anything that I can do.
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That Christ does it for me.
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Resting is letting Christ take over,
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letting Him take control.
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Because if you're trying to control it,
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you're not resting.
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And that is the moment
when my heart changed.
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I'm thankful that God used my dad
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to preach to me.
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Not only did he preach to me
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in the hospital room;
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not only did he preach to me
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throughout my whole life,
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but he preached to me
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in his final sermon
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maybe before he even
knew I would ever hear it.
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And God used that to help open my eyes
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to what I needed.
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Michael Morrow:
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I'll tell you what the blessing of God is:
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being in the will of God walking with Him,
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hearing His voice,
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staying in fellowship with Him,
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knowing His Word,
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loving Him,
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seeing miracles wrought
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because He's doing it through your life
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and in your life
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for His own glory,
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where only He can get glory
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out of your life.
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That is the life of faith.
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And it might mean that
you don't have anything.
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Guys, this world is not what it's about.
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This is not where your fulfillment is.
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Here we live by faith,
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not by sight.
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Then, we'll see Him as He is
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and we'll be like Him.
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And then it will be by sight.