The secret of keeping a positive mindset through being told "no" | Dennis Kneale | TEDxFultonStreet
-
0:06 - 0:10Today, I want to talk to you
about the idea of thriving on no. -
0:11 - 0:13That's pretty much
how I've spent my entire career, -
0:13 - 0:16is trying to get past
that negative synonym. -
0:16 - 0:20That initial response and being stimulated
-
0:20 - 0:23by the adventure of trying
to turn no into yes. -
0:23 - 0:27Now, if you could be stoked by no
instead of discouraged by it. -
0:27 - 0:30If you could be challenged by it,
instead of defeated, -
0:30 - 0:34you could get a lot more accomplished
in your life and in your career. -
0:34 - 0:36Now, I spent
three decades as a journalist. -
0:36 - 0:39I was at the Wall Street journalist,
reporter and a senior editor. -
0:39 - 0:42I was the managing editor for Forbes
for a better part of a decade. -
0:42 - 0:46I was an anchor at CNBC
and Fox Business Network. -
0:46 - 0:50And when you're a journalist,
you're stock and trade is no. -
0:50 - 0:52Company's tell you no comment.
-
0:52 - 0:54Sources say, "No, I won't help you".
-
0:54 - 0:57Your editor says,
"No, I don't like your story idea". -
0:57 - 1:01At the start of my career,
reporter intern of the Detroit News, -
1:01 - 1:03well he left the profession
after only one year in it, -
1:03 - 1:05and it's because a little old lady
in Albuquerque, -
1:05 - 1:08who's doing a nice cute
little story on her, -
1:08 - 1:10would not even talk to him for the story.
-
1:10 - 1:11She was too afraid.
-
1:11 - 1:14He said, "I don't want to spend
my entire career being told no," -
1:14 - 1:19and I thought, but isn't that the fun part
trying to get to yes? -
1:19 - 1:22He didn't think so and so,
he joined big oil as an accountant. -
1:23 - 1:27Now, no gets a bum rap in America
-
1:27 - 1:31because America
is the land of opportunity, -
1:31 - 1:32the land of hope,
-
1:32 - 1:36and yes is a much more
popular thing than no. -
1:36 - 1:38No is from the wrong side of the tracks.
-
1:38 - 1:41In American, we had a popular band
years ago called Yes, -
1:41 - 1:44We had that Jim Carrey movie,
Yes Man. -
1:44 - 1:48We've got that sports montra
from Marv Albert, Yes. -
1:48 - 1:52Yes is such a positive response but no,
-
1:52 - 1:56no is so negative,
no is just the denial of hope -
1:56 - 1:58and all we hope to get done.
-
1:58 - 2:01No parking, no smoking, no loitering,
-
2:01 - 2:05no doing any of all of those things,
at the same time, in the same place. -
2:06 - 2:08I think it's time to reframe no.
-
2:09 - 2:11I think that if we can change
the way we look at no, -
2:11 - 2:14we could feel better about it
and we can accomplish more. -
2:14 - 2:19We could realize that no is nothing more
than a stop on the pathway to yes. -
2:20 - 2:24And keep in mind, without no
we would not enjoy yes nearly as much. -
2:24 - 2:25(Laughter)
-
2:25 - 2:27The few times, a few years ago,
-
2:27 - 2:30I got one of the biggest no's
of my career. -
2:30 - 2:32I was at the Fox Business Network,
I was an anchor, -
2:32 - 2:36and they decided no,
we don't want to renew your contract, -
2:36 - 2:4015 minutes before I was told
to get my briefcase and leave the building. -
2:41 - 2:43That's the way they do it these days
when they fire someone. -
2:43 - 2:46And I went
to almost every other major network, -
2:46 - 2:49saying, "Hey, I am available!" No.
-
2:49 - 2:52I went to other media outlets,
not in television, -
2:52 - 2:54and hey man, I'm coming
back into print. No. -
2:54 - 2:58I tried three or four
of the biggest PR firms in the world. -
2:58 - 3:00No, no, no, you're no PR guy.
-
3:02 - 3:05And I just thought,
you're playing with me that's all. -
3:05 - 3:07And so, I came up with a book proposal
-
3:07 - 3:11and my agent got his book proposal
looked at by 16 different publishers, -
3:11 - 3:14and every one of them said no.
-
3:15 - 3:18But you know what? It turns out
no just opens up a way for yes. -
3:18 - 3:22Because, I ended up having a book come out
earlier this year, -
3:22 - 3:27I teamed up with the world's best
crisis whisperer, Mike Sitrick, -
3:27 - 3:29and we wrote a book together.
-
3:29 - 3:32That is, I assisted him in writing it.
-
3:32 - 3:35There's a with Dennis Kneale,
biggest by line of my entire career there. -
3:36 - 3:37(Laughter)
-
3:37 - 3:40Now, working with Mike Sitrick
on this book -
3:40 - 3:44gave me a two year crash course
in crisis communications, -
3:44 - 3:48and taught me enough
to where I could go out on my own. -
3:48 - 3:52And in the art of consulting, now,
where I'm out on my own doing this stuff, -
3:52 - 3:53I get a lot more no's.
-
3:53 - 3:57I've learned that consulting
is the art of persuading people -
3:57 - 3:59to pay you to give them advice
-
3:59 - 4:01that they then feel very
empowered to ignore. -
4:02 - 4:03So that's alright though,
-
4:03 - 4:04(Laughter)
-
4:04 - 4:05as long as they pay the bills, right?
-
4:05 - 4:10Now, so that was a good thing
and that's given me a new lease on life. -
4:10 - 4:14Now, if you're the founder of a startup,
you're accustomed to a lot of no's too. -
4:14 - 4:16You try to raise money
and they tell you no. -
4:16 - 4:20You try to tell your story to the media
and reporters tell you no. -
4:20 - 4:23Now, I could tell you
how to go about turning that no into yes. -
4:23 - 4:27I could tell you how you emphasize
three key aspects of every good story -
4:28 - 4:32and that is conflict,
drama, and struggle. -
4:32 - 4:35I could tell you
how you have to wrap yourself in a problem -
4:35 - 4:38that became your obsession to solve,
-
4:38 - 4:41and that that become your company
and that's what you sell. -
4:41 - 4:45I could tell about the small man,
big picture technique -
4:45 - 4:48to give your story national significance.
-
4:48 - 4:50I could tell you all of those things,
-
4:50 - 4:52but then I'd have to charge you
$600 an hour. -
4:53 - 4:56So instead, I leave you with this.
-
4:56 - 5:02The trick is to realize that no
simply is one more step on the way to yes. -
5:02 - 5:06And so that, we have to realize
that when we see a big fat no sitting there, -
5:07 - 5:09you can zoom out in the distance,
-
5:10 - 5:12kind of look at it in a different way
-
5:12 - 5:15and realize that that's not no,
that's not no at all. -
5:15 - 5:18That's just the start of not yet.
-
5:18 - 5:19(Laughter)
-
5:19 - 5:20Thank you very much!
-
5:20 - 5:22(Applause)
- Title:
- The secret of keeping a positive mindset through being told "no" | Dennis Kneale | TEDxFultonStreet
- Description:
-
Media Strategist Dennis Kneale — former Managing Editor at Forbes, on-air personality at Fox Business News and CNBC, and writer at Wall Street Journal — knows that pitching media outlets means a lot of rejection. Here he shares his personal method of keeping an optimistic perspective. For three decades, Kneale has been a journalist and media relations strategist.
Formerly with FOX Business Network (FBN) and CNBC, Kneale was previously a managing editor at Forbes Magazine where he most notably covered corporate corruption, including the trials of Martha Stewart, Dennis Kozlowski, Bernie Ebbers. While there, he also oversaw business coverage including the Internet boom, bust and rebuild; corporate scandals and investor fallout; the backlash against the drug industry amid drug recalls and soaring costs; and the rise of Google. Kneale joined Forbes in 1998 to expand its coverage of technology, media and health.
Prior to his role at Forbes, Kneale spent 16 years at The Wall Street Journal where he was a senior editor, directing much of the coverage of new AIDS treatments, which won a Pulitzer Prize in 1997. He started at the Journal in 1982 initially covered advertising, technology and media before becoming an editor in 1990. This talk was given at a TEDx event using the TED conference format but independently organized by a local community. Learn more at https://www.ted.com/tedx
- Video Language:
- English
- Team:
- closed TED
- Project:
- TEDxTalks
- Duration:
- 05:34
Maricene Crus
A small correction, please:
at 0:46
And when you're a journalist,
you're stock and trade is no. => your stock in trade is no.
https://idioms.thefreedictionary.com/stock+in+trade
Thanks,
Maricene Crus
At 3:31
There's a with Dennis Kneale,
biggest by line of my entire career there. => biggest byline of my entire career there.
https://www.merriam-webster.com/dictionary/byline
Thank you!