Public speaking needs more introverts, and vice versa | Dāvis Golds | TEDxRiga

It is often said that public speaking – the ability to communicate ideas clearly for a larger audience – is a skill for extroverts. However, introverts will often have ideas and visions that they need to share with the world as well. We would all benefit from more introverts taking up public speaking. After all, they do control a large part of modern-day society - technology, that is. This talk explores why introverts should look to public speaking as a means of communicating their message and how everyone, including extroverts, can help them do it.

A member of Toastmasters International, the largest public speaking organization in the world, Davis is currently the European public speaking champion and Vice‑president of Public Relations for the Riga Toastmasters Club. Ever since childhood, he has been obsessed with creative writing and story‑telling. As a teenager, he took up public speaking as a way to express himself and share his stories. Despite his continuing stage fright, he has fallen in love with presenting in public. Davis believes that Latvians’ rich story‑telling traditions have been somewhat overlooked when compared to their folk songs and dances. His goal is to encourage as many people as possible to tell their stories and break the stereotype that Latvians are quiet and reserved people.

This talk was given at a TEDx event using the TED conference format but independently organized by a local community. Learn more at https://www.ted.com/tedx

Imagine an unlikely story.

One day, you get a knock on your door,

and as you open it, you see a bunch
of official looking people in uniforms

who say that you have been chosen

to represent your country
in the next space mission.

And before you can say a word,

you get dragged to a car,
driven to the launch pad,

put in a tight space suit,
and fired into space.

How would you feel
in that tight space suit?

How would you feel spending months
in a lonely space capsule?

Some of you would feel trapped,
enclosed in that little space,

unable to communicate
with the rest of the world.

While others would feel
the complete opposite:

you'd feel safe, as if the whole
of space couldn't hurt you.

Nowadays, we call that second
group of people introverts

because in many ways,
introverts feel like social astronauts.

Whenever they engage
in a social conversation,

they feel like they are
on a hostile planet,

and they need to wear a social space suit

in order for there to be a layer
between them and the rest of the world.

In fact, if they could put on
an actual space suit

and come to parties dressed like that
so they wouldn't have to talk to people,

they'd do it.

Moreover, if they had a choice to come
to your party or be shot into space,

they'd be shot into space.

I myself grew up as a quiet child,
so very predictably, I became an engineer.

That is right, ladies and gentlemen,

I spent five years of university
just to become a stereotype.

But somewhere along the line,
I also got a love for public speaking,

being on stage.

So a typical workday would be
hours of silence, sitting at a computer,

and then in the evening,
I'd have to entertain an audience.

And when people find out
about this seemingly dual life of mine,

they act surprised, and honestly,
I find it a bit patronizing.

As if people are saying,

"Oh, so you not only generate ideas
in that little basement

but also crawl out into the sunlight
and present those ideas?

How fascinating!"

But I know they mean well;

I know they only mean that it's surprising

that someone could like
something for introverts

but also like something for extroverts.

But this is where I think
they get it wrong:

in assuming that public speaking
is only meant for extroverts.

I myself, I'm your bog standard,
run-of-the-mill,

ready-made, factory-produced,
stereotypical introvert.

I'm the type of guy that comes to parties

and then disappears
under mysterious circumstances.

(Laughter)

And I don't apologize for who I am;
I've been like this since early childhood.

Even though I loved
playing football with my mates,

I would make up excuses
as to why I couldn't go out.

"Yeah, hi. Yes, sorry ...
I can't go out, my cat died ...

Yes, again."

(Laughter)

The best part about that story
is I have never owned a cat.

I would much rather stay inside,
gather all my toys on my bed

and pretend like it was a Mars station,

pretend that if I had
to step out of my bed,

I would die in Mars's toxic atmosphere.

But then high school came.

And as a typical teenager,
I was dissatisfied with who I was,

so I decided to sign up for something
I thought only those cool extroverts did.

I signed up to do public speaking.

My school was hosting an artist's evening
where the more creative students

could show off their artwork,
perform their songs,

or in my case, deliver a story.

I remember my shaky legs
as I walked on the stage.

I remember my heart
racing like a hummingbird.

I remember my shoes

because that was the only thing
I looked at the entire time.

But after I finished and I looked up,

despite my fears,
no one was angry or hostile,

they just clapped, and I thought,
well, that wasn't too bad.

And ever since then, I've fallen in love
with speaking on stage.

After university, I joined
Toastmasters International.

I competed in several
public speaking competitions,

and me, the quiet introvert,
actually won a few of them.

But most importantly,
through public speaking,

I got to meet some of the most
interesting and intelligent people

I'll ever meet in my entire life.

And sure, most of them
are big, outgoing extroverts,

but occasionally,

I will meet a fellow social astronaut
who share my story,

who are also very quiet

but decided to step on stage
despite their fears.

But this is the exception, not the rule.

Mostly, when you ask an introvert

to come to a social gathering
or a networking event,

they just float in one of the corners.

I know. That's what I do.

But if I do meet someone
like me at these events,

I force myself to go to talk to them.

So I wobble up in my big space suit,
turn up my radio and say,

"H-hi, what do you do?"

(Laughter)

And they give me a stock answer, like,
"Oh, you know, nothing much."

(Laughter)

You'd be surprised how much hides
under the phrase "You know, nothing much."

I've heard some of the most
interesting scientific ideas,

heard about professions
I never knew existed,

and understood some
very complicated concepts

taught to me by people
who do, you know, nothing much.

Those who say the least
often have the most to say.

And we've heard so many
great introverts today

who shared their stories,

but it breaks my heart to think
that there are so many more out there,

sitting in design offices,
computer rooms, science labs,

whose minds are beaming with ideas,
but who will never tell them to anybody.

Oh, sure, they'll present
a boring presentation to their boss

or begrudgingly
do a report for their peers,

but most of us will never
get to hear their great ideas.

And what the hell is an idea worth
if it is not shared?

So, my fellow introverts, I see you ...

(Laughter)

sitting calmly in your seats

knowing that there are no more breaks
and you won't be forced to socialize.

(Laughter)

I implore you to take up public speaking.

Yes, it is scary,
and you will feel nervous,

but everyone who gets on stage
is nervous and feels scared,

even the most extroverted.

But here's the difference.

For extroverts, this is a new feeling,

but for us introverts,
this is home court,

this is how we feel every time someone
approaches us with a conversation.

(Laughter)

But public speaking
is much better than that.

I mean, look at this:

there are at least ten meters
between me and the closest person.

(Laughter)

This isn't so much of a space suit
as it is a space station.

(Laughter)

Moreover, I got to spend hours
writing my speech, alone.

(Laughter)

I get to speak with everyone
at the same time

and not have to spend hours
talking with everyone individually.

(Laughter)

Fifteen minutes -
fifteen minutes, and I'm out.

(Laughter)

Oh, and there's another great thing:
I only have to speak for fifteen minutes,

and then, not only am I allowed to leave,
I'm expected to leave!

(Laughter)

(Applause)

It's as if public speaking
was designed by introverts.

(Laughter)

I know, my dear extroverts,

I see you, squirming in your seats,

waiting for the networking event
so you can make new contacts.

Don't think that this talk is geared
only towards the quiet.

You have a task as well.

It is up to you to persuade
your more quieter friends

to get up on stage, to speak,
to inform, and to inspire.

I'm sure you know plenty of introverts,

but let's assume you don't and you want
to meet an introvert in the wild.

(Laughter)

Go to events, and here's how you find
and persuade your introverts.

Step one: find your target.

(Laughter)

Introverts are not difficult to find.

If you place an introvert
in an empty room,

he will naturally gravitate
towards a corner.

(Laughter)

It's basic physics.

(Laughter)

(Applause)

Another telltale sign is introverts spend
way too much time with the host's cat,

and they're the only ones
studying fire escape plans.

(Laughter)

Step two: engage your target.

Oh, and don't come up to them
with your brash confidence;

we [introverts] are quiet,
timid creatures,

and we are scared off very easily.

Instead, apologize to us for breaking
the silence and ask us the question,

"I'm sorry, but what do you do?"

Ask follow up questions if necessary,
listen, and encourage.

And step three: if you find
the [introvert's] ideas interesting,

urge them to share those ideas.

"So, have you thought about joining
a public speaking club?"

"So, have you heard of TEDxRiga?"

In many ways,

those who have the quietest mouths,
have the loudest minds.

So I've made it my mission

to drag up every nerd,
every shy person, every introvert on stage

so that they would be heard.

And it's not always easy,
it's an uphill battle,

but the social astronauts
are well worth it.

My favorite Latin phrase is

"ex glande quercus."

I don't know what that means ...

(Laughter)

but it's Latin, so it must be
something clever.

No, it means that mighty oak trees
come from humble acorns.

And it's all great and well,
teaching introverts when they are adults,

but don't forget that we have
classrooms full of children

in cute, tiny, little space suits

who will grow up to be introverts.

Our educational system will be
more based on technology than ever,

while communication
will continue to be relegated

to boring PowerPoint presentations.

These are the people who will run
this century and the next,

who will become better
at speaking with computers

while not really getting better
at speaking with each other.

And if we don't encourage
the most introverted

to open up their space suits and speak,

the professions that are
dominated by introverts -

technology and engineering -

will become less influential,
less understood, and less popular,

and as a result, all of us will lose out.

But it doesn't have to be like this.

Look, we can encourage
the shyest out of our midst to speak,

and in doing so, our entire
collective understanding will improve.

If there's one small thing you've learned
from today's brave speakers,

it's that the public speaking
in its essence is really human.

Sharing stories is human,
listening to stories is human,

and by doing so,
we all get a bit more human.

So, my fellow social astronauts,

I know that public speaking is hard.

But it is also important.

No one can share your ideas for you,
no one can tell your stories for you;

you must make this journey,

and there will be plenty
of people willing to help.

Learn from those introverts

who were brave enough
to step on this stage today.

And you do not have to stop
being an introvert.

Wear that space suit with pride
and never take it off.

All you have to do is turn up
your radio and speak to the world.

And the world will stop and listen.

To you.

(Applause)